u/welcometothechaos9

Hey dad.. i have a bad eating disorder. One that convinces me food is out to kill me and everyone is watching me eat.
In the worst of my episodes i’d go days at a time without so much as a bite of food.
I tried so hard dad. I promise but after 7 months the longest i’ve gone yet i’ve relapsed. I hate it but its been expected. Lately its been so much harder to force myself to eat and i’ve been surrounded by triggers. Yet i tried. I promise dad i tried. I ignored the thoughts and kept eating whatever i could. Today i felt the paranoia creeping in while eating a meal. So i tried doing as im supposed to and redirecting. I abandoned that meal and made a sandwich. But i couldnt eat that either. Even with a simpler meal my brain convinced me it was dangerous. I ate as much as i could i promise but i started getting a panic attack and.. i just couldnt dad. Im sorry.. i wish i wasnt this way. I wish my brain didn’t see normal food as dangerous. Im sorry.

No advice about like fixing the situation please. the cause of this is sadly something that cant be prevented or undone.
And please don’t be harsh on any alter this isnt anyone in the systems fault

In our system of 3 when we aren’t fronting we stop existing until we are fronting again.
We recently learned something incredibly stressfull and it been effecting our life, since then the only other adult alter has went dormant due to grief.
The only other alter not dormant is our little whose been confirmed to be mentally 4. Allowing her to front would be dangerous for her mental health, and as the gatekeeper i cant allow that she already struggles due to being unlucky enough to be a traumaholder and a little at the same time.
But honestly i’m so tired of fronting and i really dont want to deal with the stuff going on right now. While im able to control who is allowed to front and will an alter into front i cant force a front if the party fights back.
So i’m forced to stay fronting, because i’m the only one who can pretend to be fine right now. And i hate it so much.
I’m not good at handling extended stress yet here i am, pretending i can till our actual protector feels comfortable to front again. I don’t blame xem this is a stressful time for all of us.
Im just so tired of this

Hi dad! I don’t want any advice but i’m in a really tough situation were i have no say, and kinda just need to talk to a parent who will listen.

My mother signed a lease for a house states away. Without telling me. I found out yesterday we are moving in two weeks.
Im a minor but honestly i hate this so much. Ever since i was 8, i’ve never had real friends everyone i tried to befriend either ghosted me out pitied me for my medical history.
but in the past year i’ve made connections! I have friends, a therapist, doctors, even a crush! Yet I’m being forced away from all that with basically no warning
My therapist agreed to work on getting a license for the state we are moving to but that could take months. It took me 3 years to trust her enough to tell her everything she knows i cant switch therapists its too risky.
Not only that after telling me this no one checked in on me. The only conversation mother had with me was defending her choice and telling me i was selfish to not want to move..
i’m a diagnosed su*cidal i have been for almost two years. yet no one in my family thought to check in on me after such a betrayal. They didn’t even notice when i was obviously having a panic attack. (Hyperventilating very obviously)
Yet my friends my amazing friends who i’ll have to talk to basically only online from now on? First thing they did after being informed of this unreasonable deadline before moving was checking in on me.
Sorry for the kinda word vomit i’m just processing alot right now love you dad

Tw talk of medical neglect, allergies, minor mentions of cancer/dying. and mental abuse, and minor mentions of anorexia
(could also be tagged under family/in-laws)

I’m a cancer survivor with anorexia who doesnt have many allergies but the ones i do have my immune system has the habit of turning severe. I’ve flatlined from a originally “minor” allergy to a preservative in blood/platelet transfusions
So when I noticed i started developing a cherry allergy i took that seriously and immediately started avoiding any chance of an allergen

however for the first month after realizing i didnt tell my guardian. They have a habit of making my struggles about them and often pulls the “im the worst parent!” Card, whenever you bring up any of their failures

Eventually i had no choice to tell them and they reacted even worse then i imagined even accusing me of just “not liking” cherries and making it up to make their life harder.

So for about 2 months i just managed my symptoms alone with constant cross contamination happening dispite everyone in the house knowing and me specifically telling them i was moving my stuff to a specific part of the freezer no one uses people would “accidentally” place their contaminated stuff right next to my stuff.
But from constant contamination my allergy has gotten slightly worse, now even touching third hand contamination causes symptoms.
so i went behind my guardian’s back and told my doctor. The whole appointment my guardian was very obviously glaring at me and giving me a side eye. Today they got everyone a large shake except me. Nonono they got me a small! I could understand getting me no shake because she was scared of contamination but the got me the size a toddler would eat and they didn’t even explicitly state i have an allergy!
You’d think you’d want your recovering anorexic dependent to be properly fed and know how to avoid allergens but no they messed with ice-cream a sacred dessert for anyone
Am i overreacting or is this clearly targeting?

(TLDR i went behind my guardians back to get diagnosed for an allergy they don’t believe i have and now they are punishing me by restricting my icecream)

So im about to start a new war based moded server, and I’ve agreed with another player i’ll be their spy. My question is how private exactly are password voice chats? Our current plan is to act as rivals to stop suspicion but if we voice chat together could people see we are sharing a group? Worst case scenario i could relay the information via discord but feels abit less in the spirit of the game

As the title states i’ve been incredibly stressed lately and last night i heard my mothers friend call me lucky for my allergy on the phone, mother even laughted and agreed. My allergy is a deadly reaction to a preservative that’s in pretty much every medical transfusion (except saline ofc). I’ve went into a coma from a vaccine before and legally died from a blood transfusion
As a cancer survivor i’ve had to be repeatedly exposed to it to the point I’ve developed ptsd just from thinking about it.

I once had an allergic reaction over sunscreen because someone put a medical grade preservative in a sunscreen. And she called me lucky.. because im legally exempt from mandatory vaccines (they are both antivacs) like i wouldnt love to get them if i wont die! I have a phobia of metals! Why? because i havent had a tetanus shot since i was 4!
Im so tired dad how can people be so disrespectful about such serious problems :(
So last night i ended up spiraling only to gave a allergic reaction to nothing.
There’s nothing i’ve ate lately im allergic too or havent ate in a extended period of time. Nothing just my body overreacting at the mere thought of the preservative.
I could use a pep talk dad im tired of my conditions being downplayed..

I’d like to preface this by saying we are a system and have alters who are like their own people.
Does anyone else sometimes dissociate without switching? If i had to describe it i’d say its like a alter steps down only to just front again, or an alter spaces completely out only to snap back before someone else can take over.
I tried doing research on this but i couldnt find anything, somehow every article just described just not having alters and dissociating. Anyone else experience something like this?

We have a legally recognized cat ESA called Domino, our little is incredibly shy, fully nonverbal and doesn’t see herself as remotely human. she fronts when she feels safe and when alone. That being said whenever she decides to front Domino has started immediately going to her side and guarding her, even going as far as grooming her hair relentlessly lol. And whenever they do get playful somehow she never comes out with a single scratch on the body (domino can get carried away when hyper and will often give us micro scratches) its honestly incredibly wholesome and helps us feel safe to let her fully front without worrying about her getting in danger :) and has also served as incentive to get her to front more and spend next time stuck in the mindscape!