u/zonemiax

Hi. so sorry if this isn’t in the right sub but idk where else to go, I’m 20F and I’ve been dealing with depressive symptoms for a long time with multiple times of crisis as a young teenager that required intervention from School, Police & A&E. (Mental illness & severe personality disorders do run in my family & I have a very complicated physical health history)

I dodged any type of diagnoses, therapy, support etc. due to being told to avoid getting any type of mental health diagnosis by family members as in their experiences they found that getting their mental health diagnosis was the worst thing that they had ever done as symptoms that were as a result of serious medical conditions were either ignored or completely disregarded by GPs because of their mental health history in their record.

This is genuinely my worst fear of having something serious ignored and dying as a result of it so for years i’ve basically suppressed any types of emotions I feel and all my friendships and relationships always break down and are never long-lasting.

My problem is that things are getting too much for me and this time around things are different, as i’m in University and have spent most of first year in student accommodation lying on my bedroom floor and not eating which resulted in near fainting episodes and so I’d stagger desperately to the lifts just to get a snack from the vending machine.
Imagine months and months of this, alongside daily drinking and participating in risky behaviours with friends who basically dragged me out, you can imagine that I would develop some dark, scary thoughts and non-stop browsing through certain “advice” forums (I’m being purposely vague as I don’t want others to come across it)

I would have thought since coming home for the summer, things would go back to my baseline of normal but it hasn’t and going into the next year of uni scares me a little because how long would it take for things to basically reach a crisis point ..?

This week, I finally spoke to my family about how things are and the reaction I got was one of anger and shame and the message I got was to shut up, stay away from the NHS about it and figure something out for yourself. I have always used online chat support services thing (think of things like childline when i was a kid) and yeah it’s nice but it feels like a script and when i do the things they ask nothing really changes and they always say that they can see i’m trying but there’s not much that they can offer me.

Hi with uni starting again soon, is anyone else feeling glad and happy for it to be back so you can be away from home?

My parents, who are 70+ and while i do love them, can be exhausting as they have very little patience and get angry and yell a lot over little things. I’ve not been out much this summer apart from work because they give me the silent treatment and huff and roll their eyes at me if i go out with friends so ive lost a lot of friends I got in first year.

Im transferring my course so im starting all over again so im a little nervous about having to go through the whole process of meeting new people again.
At least going back to uni, I have more freedom to live my life without feeling like i need permission all the time!

Hi! 20F, and as well as eczema, I also suffer from hay fever and asthma!
I break out in hives daily, some small and some big ones (have had one covering my entire lower arm) and get tingling sensations all over including mouth and throat. I manage my eczema with topical steroids but this is only management as, as soon as i stop or run out, it all comes back again. I have brought this up with the GP about my frustrations and whether if i could get a dermatology referral but all I get are new prescriptions for higher-content steroid creams and so i’m currently on a very strong topical steroid.

I have had a basic allergy test as I have allergy & infection prone asthma that tested for house dust mites, animal dander, timothy grass, aspergillus and mould. All of which came back with me being severely allergic.

I run a very strict schedule in my home in avoiding these allergens, no pets, requiring anyone who has pets to put on clean clothes and washing hands before they come into my home (I have very nearly died from an asthma attack due to pet hair and strong perfumes), and more.

I run a food diary, replaced any skin care products with prescription ones that are non-scented, with nothing working. I feel like i’m just trying absolutely everything they’re telling me to do and nothing is changing. I’m at my wits end.

I brought this up to my asthma nurse in my yearly asthma review about my hives and she basically said that I have to take MULTIPLE pictures of any big hives before i attempt to make any type of appointment relating to it as my pictures of the hives I already have, are just too small and I will not be taken seriously and essentially fobbed off. She basically said that it is extremely difficult to get an in-depth allergy test and that I shouldn’t hope for anything.

This is basically now a luck game of me waiting everyday taking any pictures I have and hoping that something big will come up. It makes me sad that I have to essentially suffer and get worse before I am taken seriously.
I’m not the only one who struggles to be taken seriously by the NHS and have had multiple family members having to sacrifice months and months worth of wages to be seen by a private doctor and to run tests, to only end up in hospital due to conditions that have been ignored by NHS GPs.

I love the NHS and wouldn’t get rid of it for the world and understand that it is very overstretched with 14 years of austerity and underfunding but surely something has to change.

Hi! 20F, and as well as eczema, I also suffer from hay fever and asthma!
I break out in hives daily, some small and some big ones (have had one covering my entire lower arm) and I manage my eczema with topical steroids but this is only management as, as soon as i stop or run out, it all comes back again. I have brought this up with the GP about my frustrations and all I get are new prescriptions for higher-content steroid creams and so i’m currently on a very strong topical steroid (Clobetasol 0.05%).

I have had a basic allergy test as I have allergy & infection prone asthma that tested for house dust mites, animal dander, timothy grass, aspergillus and mould. All of which came back with me being severely allergic.

I run a very strict schedule in my home in avoiding these allergens, no pets, requiring anyone who has pets to put on clean clothes and washing hands before they come into my home (I have very nearly died from an asthma attack due to pet hair and strong perfumes), and more.

I run a food diary, replaced any skin care products with prescription ones that are non-scented. I feel like i’m just at my wits end.
I brought this up to my asthma nurse in my yearly asthma review about my hives issues and she basically said that I have to take MULTIPLE pictures of any big ones before i attempt to make any type of appointment relating to it as my pictures of the hives I already have, are just too small and I will not be taken seriously and essentially fobbed off. She basically said that it is extremely difficult to get an in-depth allergy test and that I shouldn’t hope for anything.
This is basically now a luck game of me waiting everyday taking any pictures I have and hoping that something big will come up and I feel like this shouldn’t be this way.

I love the NHS, but God, they are honestly awful in managing chronic conditions.

Hi! i’m 20F and just passed my test in February, I have a 2015 Fiesta and I’ve just had to get it taken to the garage due to a awful rattling noise, a pulling back-and-forth sensation when going up to speed and oil light.
The garage found a degraded wet belt and a blown head gasket and has said it needs a completely new engine.
They described the car as otherwise in very very good condition with 50k mileage.

However, with added labour costs I have been priced at £3000, the same value I bought the car for.

On one side, my parents say, go for it and we’ll help you to pay the costs which is very very generous but i feel extremely lucky and guilty that they’ve considered that.

One an another side, my sister’s boyfriend said, don’t pay for it, you’re basically paying the same of what the car is worth and that i’m better off getting it towed to an another garage and getting it done cheaper.

I only have just under £3000 and cannot afford an another car and the options aren’t great.

It just passed its MOT like 3 weeks ago and i just got a new job, hoping to build a bit more money, this is the worst timing hahaha 😭
(keep in mind, before you say bank of mum and dad, i’ve paid for absolutely everything to do with the car AND my driving lessons & test)

I’m at a standstill of everyone telling me different things and it’s honestly so stressful to try and figure out what the best option is for me.

Hi! i’m 20F and just passed my test in February, I have a 2015 Fiesta and I’ve just had to get it taken to the garage due to a awful rattling noise, a pulling back-and-forth sensation when going up to speed and oil light.
The garage found a degraded wet belt and a blown head gasket and has said it needs a completely new engine.
They described the car as otherwise in very very good condition with 50k mileage.

However, with added labour costs I have been priced at £3000, the same value I bought the car for.

On one side, my parents say, go for it and we’ll help you to pay the costs which is very very generous but i feel extremely lucky and guilty that they’ve considered that.

One an another side, my sister’s boyfriend said, don’t pay for it, you’re basically paying the same of what the car is worth and that i’m better off getting it towed to an another garage and getting it done cheaper.

I only have just under £3000 and cannot afford an another car and the options aren’t great.

It just passed its MOT like 3 weeks ago and i just got a new job, hoping to build a bit more money, this is the worst timing hahaha 😭
(keep in mind, before you say bank of mum and dad, i’ve paid for absolutely everything to do with the car AND my driving lessons & test)

I’m at a standstill of everyone telling me different things and it’s honestly so stressful to try and figure out what the best option is for me.

hello! 20F here with profound bilateral sensorineural hearing loss with just one cochlear implant!
i have older parents and i started to notice my dad was getting symptoms of hearing loss so i encouraged him to go and get seen and he was diagnosed with mild hearing loss in both ears.
He received 2 hearing aids and he was so embarrassed to have them and while i understand where he comes from, it’s a new thing to him, it hurts me a little.. like, i’ve lived with this my entire life and he sees it as embarrassing. I do my best to relate with each other - struggling in crowds, people mumbling etc - so he could feel a bit more at ease with his new hearing aids.

I don’t feel upset towards him at all for feeling this way, he’s 70+ and it’s a lot for him, it was just a little sting in my heart. is there any other way i could help him feel a little more comfortable with it

hi!
i am on the market street depart. more specifically deli, i joined just over a week ago and have just been told by my manager that i will be closing on my own this week. I’m so nervous because there’s so much to remember and do and im scared of forgetting anything important and having me/someone else get into trouble for it and the idea of not being able to ask for help from my colleague/manager makes it a bit more daunting.
my store is only small so there’s only 2 of us at a time, but the hours were cut recently (i was told) so closings are down to one person. this might just be the standard in other morrisons but i don’t know hahah 🥲

any tips?

Hi, I applied for a job as a Tesco Colleague via the Tesco careers website a week-ish ago but I missed the call as I was driving.
Every single day since, I have rang up the number I was given on both the email and phone number but I got no answer at all. I then rang and went up into person to the Tesco store and was basically told that there’s nothing they can do until I ring the number.
I have just got sent a rejection email and I feel this is a little unfair? I mean I have made the upmost effort to get back into touch, and it’s a little frustrating as I’m in a big need of a job & there’s little to none retail jobs in my area at the moment

to preface: (19F)
i know this is my fault, and i don’t want this to sound like a woe-is-me post but i’m wondering of anyone who’s had a similar experience as i don’t have many people in my life.

basically i failed for not turning half of my assignments in, the assignments i did turn in got either a 1st class or 2:1.
i spend over half of first year in bed, just staring up at the ceiling, not eating and if i did eat, id use delivery. this made me experience near passing outs multiple times in my student accommodation lifts.

id watch the sun rise and set over and over and watch as the emails flood in my inbox about attendance warnings.
i dont really feel much of anything, its crazy because i used to be a passionate person about my academia.
and now im home and unis finished for the year, not much has changed except i just sit in the living room with parents and look at my phone & nitpick at my appearance like any girl.

i expect to be withdrawn so im not going to bother anyone with the question.
i do apologise if its such a downer post haha, i dont really have anywhere to go, i dont really know what i want out of it except just to say something ig?

hi! i just got a part-time job in the market street & cafe, and im waiting for my first day but i dont really know what to expect, does anyone have any advice?

hi im 19F living in England, not currently diagnosed with anything.

I use Kooth quite regularly, and I was due for a booked chat with a practitioner; however i missed it because of a family issue and messaged to reschedule. The thing is with Kooth is that you never get any notification when you get a reply, as it's a website, so I'm constantly checking for a reply, and there was nothing, so I went to bed and woke up today and checked and saw a message saying that I've been kicked off it.

I am devastated.

This isn't my first experience of this however, I got acquainted with CAMHS in 2020 when I was 14 because I was struggling to cope with lockdown (amongst other things), and I only got one phone call and heard nothing else since. I recently found a letter in my mum's room from CAMHS saying that I was discharged because of non-attendance for appointments that no one told me about.

I understand why they do it: they think you don't need it anymore and need to make space for others who do, but you can't help but be hurt by it.

Because of this, I am terrified of reaching out to the NHS again and having any type of mental health issues on my medical records because I've heard horror stories from people saying that doctors didn't take them seriously when they had life-threatening illnesses because they saw anxiety on their medical records, and that's my genuine worst nightmare.

i genuinely dont see a way out anymore

Hi, I got hired with Asda only just this week and I need to complete new starter tasks before I get a start date.

However, I can't seem to get onto Workday at all as I got sent two emails with username and password, was told to put the password in and then ill get prompted to reset it. I do this and I get an error message saying that it's 'Unable to process request'.

I've tried clearing my cache, using different browsers and nothing, and this is the day after I got sent the emails, and I couldn't get on yesterday, too.

Anyone had the same issue and are there solutions?

I haven't had my induction yet, and I've not heard a date. I don't have any contact details from anyone. I was just rang up Friday saying I've passed the interview, told to log onto the asda careers website and do the tasks (basic info) over the weekend and then got sent the details for workday yesterday

Hi,(19F & UK) over the last year or two, I have started to get intense headaches on my magnet site that go into my eye, neck and mouth. My eye has a strange pressure feeling like someone is squeezing it, and my left side of my mouth, more specifically my cheek (implant side) has a weak sensation. It happens a couple of times a day with varying intensity; it could be that it's a very slight headache and I can ignore it or it's just so intense that I have to rip off the processor and physically hold my hand over the magnet site.

I am 18 years post-cochlear implantation, and I have never had any symptoms that were processor-related until now.

I, at the very first point of call, went to my audiologist, and he seemed concerned and wrote it down. He checked my implant site and my electrodes, he said all is fine and that since I have an average of 15 hours on air daily, he thinks it'll be down to overuse.

I switched down magnet sizes as I've been on a size 3 all my life, and nothing has changed except for my processor falling off all the time, so nothing has come out of that.

I'm not disputing that it may be down to overuse, but I have always had a range of 13-15 hours with the processor, and symptoms have only cropped up recently, and I've tried everything, even putting a little plaster on the processor, thinking it was just rubbing onto the site.

I obviously have tried to cut down on my hours, but I find it gives me that usual headache in the morning if I don't wear the processor for a while, and everything feels overstimulating, so 13-15 hours is the most comfortable for me.

I have not changed anything with my mapping, and I'm scoring very highly on hearing tests; I'm just at my wits end.

Has anyone else experienced the same? Is there anything else I can do holistically, or is this a thing I need to go to the GP with? I just want rid of these headaches.

Edit: I forgot to mention that I have a nucleus 7.

I’m disabled through being deafened as a result of being severely premature and given ototoxic drugs.

All my life, I have been babied, infantilised and having no independence and now at 19 it’s ruining my life.
I feel trapped in my own home and i feel like my life is wasting away.
My parents didn’t even want to let me go to the gym because it would mean that I was driving at night, they didn’t even let me take the train to the city centre (15 mins away) until I had to for University, hell they didn’t even want me to go to Uni. They didn’t want me to get a car or drive on the motorway.

During my first year, I went into student accommodation (against everyone in my family’s wishes) and honestly it was the best thing i have ever done in my life, I experienced SO much that most people probably have already done, I went on nights out, I went clubbing, I went on midnight walks with my friends and I didn’t tell my parents what I did and it was so freeing.
But even though i was in uni, they still didn’t leave me alone. I was in my lecture and my mum BLEW UP my phone with texts and phone calls and i couldn’t answer right away (in the middle of my lecture!!!) so I waited until the break, my mum and my sisters were panicking when i rang them back! Turns out all my mum wanted was to know if i’d liked a coat she found in the shop!

Is there any need for that?!
I give my sister my Life360 location as a compromise instead of my parents having it and apparently my mum was ringing my sister up begging her for my location and thankfully my sister said No and that I was fine.

Now, i’m at home for the summer and i feel like i’m being suffocated and it upsets me greatly when i see my friends doing amazing things that I can’t do, they do solo-trips, marathons or just cool shit and i bring it up to my family the possibility of me doing something like that and the message i receive back from them is “It’s not you that i don’t trust, it’s other people”

I’m going to turn 20 soon and my biggest fear is that when I have grandkids of my own, I’m going to have nothing to tell them about my life. I’m so scared of having regrets. It makes me cry thinking about it because I want to do more, I want to live a fulfilling life and I’m not going to have time like I do as a young person and what kills me is that my parents grew up in the ‘50s and ‘60s having that independence and they tell me about it ALL of the time.

I don’t know if i’m being ungrateful but I wish I wasn’t disabled, I wish i was normal.

hi! I have a cochlear implant on my left side since I was 2 years old (implanted 2008) and my right ear (moderate-severe) unaided. (UK based with NHS services & take in consideration that I do not know my current audiologist as I have moved from adolescent to adult services and i’m not due to meet them until next year)

I got my first hearing aid when I was 15 and I wore it for 6 months, I gave up it because i struggled with bullying and people slamming books down next to me which led to me developing severe ringing in my ears whenever i wore the hearing aid

My implant centre has said to me that if and when i feel ready to try again, I am always welcome to and now at 19, i am struggling a lot more with only having one-sided aid due to the difference in my environment and not being in a structured school setting so having an hearing aid is back on the cards for me.

The only thing stopping me now is not knowing how to get used to the hearing aid properly and what to do to make my experience easier.
My problem is that I found that the cochlear implant overpowered the hearing aid and I was still heavily relying on the implant and everything just felt so imbalanced. If i wear the hearing aid on its own, I could make out more sounds but i still can’t make out speech, the only thing that’s clear enough for me is strong letter sounds (“b” “g” etc) and I don’t know how to get my brain to balance my ears out more
Also please note my cochlear implant is from Cochlear and the hearing aid I had was Phonak (most likely to get same brand again)

hello! 19F (UK) and i was first prescribed Montelukas in 2019 after a life-threatening asthma attack. We went into lockdown immediately after and my mental health plummeted and I had a mental health crisis that put me in A&E.
I still struggle with it to this day (stuck in the waiting lists to see anyone because i’ve been kicked out and then put back on over and over) and ive only ever had 1 telephone consultation with a woman that asked why i needed the mental health services.

Now fast forward to a couple of months ago, I arraigned an emergency appointment with my asthma nurse at my GP as my flare ups were getting worse and worse and a severe attack was imminent. She was appalled at the medication regime I was on (Ventolin, Montelukas and hay fever medication) and switched me over to Luforbec.

I then ran out of Montelukas and it took weeks for the pharmacy to give me it and i immediately noticed that my mood changed and while i do still struggle, it felt like I was somewhat functioning for the first time in years.

Now, i’m really concerned that I developed and have mental health problems that will follow me for the rest of my life as I have a long family history of it with both parents struggling with personality disorders and addictions and my sisters struggling with depression and anxiety.
I didn’t know that Montelukas had this effect as I was only a child when first prescribed.
Has anyone else had the same symptoms from it and how did you get over it