u/zonemiax

hello! 20F
i don’t have any official diagnoses but im in early stages of contact with my uni’s counselling team

i suffer with panic attacks daily, very persistent low mood and just utter exhaustion. unfortunately this classes me as lazy to my family and i am constantly shouted at everyday for it: i have been called “the laziest person” by them as i struggle to get out of bed, im late a lot.

this does not help me, especially when ive been dealing with increasing suicidal thoughts and just hopelessness. i’ve tried to make them understand but they are veryyy judgemental of mental health: there were somebody in the family who suffers from depression, they are very well managed and recently had a kid. my family were just slagging her off behind her back and saying things like “why did she do that, what if she goes off the rails.”
and even then i hate comments like that in regards to mental health
“going off the rails”, “gone mad” etc, it just makes me feel more ashamed..

i’ve had to hide the fact im in contact with the wellbeing team as this is the same family who got me discharged from CAMHS immediately like 5 years ago because they hid my appointment letters, it upset me so bad that they did that because i was coming off a crisis point and i really needed that support & i was essentially shut down from it.
and even now, ive not really recovered from it, nor other things thats happened to me in my life and its just like huge chain following me everywhere.

edit: I’m from England :)
I have profound hearing loss in my left ear with a cochlear implant and moderate-severe in my right ear with no aid.

I tell everyone, family, friends, work, uni, doctors, audiologist to use OTHER means of contacting me and if you HAVE to ring me, make sure to send an email or text message with all of the information afterwards.
No one listens to me!!!

I’ve just come off the phone with a new job and they were telling me all this information and I’ve no idea what he’s saying!!! I have told them in advance and multiple times that I am deaf!
Now I am panicking because he said some important things as I was able to catch him say things like “make sure to do this” but I have no idea what he wants me to do!
There’s no other ways to get in contact unless I ring him again.

Just looking at the screen where someone is ringing you gives me panic attacks!!
Listen, the bluetooth features are amazing, they are great for people who I know, who I’m used to their way of speaking, their accents, mannerisms but I’m useless with anyone else.

hello!
I received my N8 just 3 weeks ago and I noticed the strangest Bluetooth fault!
It wouldn’t stream any audio from my phone despite it saying it’s connected via the Nucleus Smart App & my phone settings (iPhone16 ProMax) but only one app worked - Spotify ?
However, it streamed my Macbook just fine!

I tried all the usual ways of fixing it, switching phone & processor completely off and back on again, forgetting & reconnecting etc etc

So, I took it to my audiology clinic & they investigated by doing all the steps to reconnect to back to the phone & updating my phone. They even replaced the processor with multiple new N8s but nothing worked.

So we did a little test, would it work with the N7?
It did! How strange..
So, the only thing that my clinic can think of that’s happened is that due to the Nucleus Smart App being updated there’s been a potential interference & its preventing any N8s from streaming to my phone.

They’ve given me back the N7 (& my N8) and said to just wear the N7 and they will get into touch with Cochlear themselves to investigate as my clinic was concerned that it might not just be my processor & that it could happen to others!

So guys, if you’re having the same issue as me with the N8 please please tell your clinic, it might be a problem that’s across a lot of batches of the N8 (i really hope not)..

Hi!
I have a referral to Dermatology & I have received an SMS saying that the referral has been deferred and that my service will contact me to make an appointment.

My issue is that for some reason, even though for every service I use (Audiology, GP, Pharmacy etc) I have always told them & have updated my contact preferences to have NO phone calls as I struggle immensely to use the phone despite having a cochlear implant, they still phone me.
Thankfully due to Bluetooth, despite telling everyone that I prefer not to use the phone and use other means of contact, I can connect my processor to my phone so I can just about get by albeit still struggling.

However, I have received a new processor and the Bluetooth isn’t working so I contacted my Implant Centre via email to investigate this and my concern is that in the meantime while I am waiting, Dermatology will try to ring me & I will miss it and what’s so frustrating is that there’s no voicemail that gets left when the hospital rings you, so I can’t use the transcription that is provided.

I tried to find the email for my trust and there isn’t one, there’s only phone numbers :(

I have been begging my GP to refer me for over a decade for this referral and I finally got it, I just can’t afford to be kicked off the referral.

Hi! I finally received the N8 and this is my review coming from the N7

Main thing, I do recommend only going every two generations if you can, however I do not have this choice so I got the N8. There isn’t much of a difference between 7 & 8 compared to going from the 6 to the 7.

The first thing I noticed when opening the box is that the bag has changed; it used to come in a big bulky backpack but now it’s a cloth tote bag, it was just an interesting observation.

Sound quality is very similar as I did only go up a generation but can notice slight differences in crispier & clearer sound.
Used forward focus while shopping with my sister as it wasn’t available for me in N7 as it was locked by my clinic, definitely a massive difference in being able to understand her as we walked through the shop and paying for items & actually being able to understand the questions from the cashier.

There’s definitely a massive push to rechargeable batteries now as I received 3 and only one disposable which was in separate packaging, not in the main box with others.

Mini mic is tiny!!! The last mic I used was the Phonak Roger mic from the early 2010s!
(If anyone’s got any advice regarding it, i’d love to know as it’s been over a decade since I used any type of mic)

Overall, processor looks really slim and pretty, I plan to accessorise it as the stickers that came with it are more for children, if anyone has any recommendations for a website i’d appreciate it :)

(Also, noticing more issues with Bluetooth streaming with the processor connecting just fine but not streaming audio from certain apps)

hello! 20F and I have had asthma since I was a baby as a result of chronic lung disease of prematurity.

My regime for many years were quite poor and I’m honestly shocked in how I really fell through the system and that no one realised it and addressed it.
I relied on solely salbutamol and no way to address the reoccurring inflammation which gradually got worse over time as I am very susceptible to respiratory infections & viruses more so than the average person.

It all came crashing down when I was 12, I had multiple sleepovers over a course of a few months at a friends who had a lovely dog. I am allergic to dogs & I pushed past it because I was 12 and didn’t want to be seen as the “weird” one who didn’t go to the sleepovers.
I started to use my inhaler basically daily with i must say over 20 puffs per hour, plus back then you used to be able to stock up on inhalers with getting multiple per prescription (not the case anymore)

The final week that I ever entered her house, we went on a day out to the local high-street and we went into a perfume shop and I forgot to bring my inhaler! The attack was so bad that I couldn’t walk, we went into a random shop and they put a stool down for me. I don’t remember much apart from being wheeled to the walk-in centre, having a nebuliser and being sent home.
I had a life-threatening asthma attack two days later, mum and sister drove me to A&E and dragged me in (couldn’t ring an ambulance as they took too long and doctors say if we left it an another ten minutes I would be dead)

I spent a weekend in hospital and was sent home with oral antibiotics, steroid inhaler to go alongside the salbutamol and medication to suppress the allergies.

I was fine for a while but then they cancelled my steroid inhaler prescription so i was back on only salbutamol.

Last year, the attacks slowly started to creep in again and the peak of it was I was in university accomodation and me and my flatmates, we all went to the Christmas Markets and I had to basically drag myself back to the accomodation because once again I forgot my inhaler.
Thankfully, I resolved the attack but this time around I saw what was happening and how it mirrored the life-threatening one.

I, immediately booked an appointment with the asthma nurse for a review and she did a little test on my asthma control and basically said that I was at a high-risk of dying from an another attack if I didn’t get it under control.
She prescribed me on a MART regime.

Honestly, my asthma has never been better, if ever actually. I can run, I can exercise and feel out of breath WITHOUT ASTHMA which I have never felt to be honest.

Hi, I made this post just under 2 weeks ago and i just wanted to give an update to say..

i finally got my referral! I had to wait for the eczema to get worse to the point it was constantly bleeding and weeping to take photos of it to show the GP. I also told my GP how I’ve been on topical steroids for many years and just how much pain i’m in & how it’s affecting my quality of life.

I can’t believe they’ve actually listened!! So now, all I have to do is wait 5-6weeks (or more) for a phone call for an appointment! They’ve also given an emollient gel to use while i’m waiting.

i just wanted to say thank you all for your kind words and support, it means the world to me

Sorry if this isn’t the right sub! Just really over my head on whether if it’s worth it or am I just wasting my time!

(20F) To summarise a very complicated situation, I was a victim of child-on-child sexual exploitation in 2019 and I participated in a Police investigation where they just basically asked me what happened in the year it happened over, & took my phone I had at the time.
Afterwards, I was told that I would be contacted with the next steps but never heard anything else since (99% sure it was liaised with the adults in my life but I was never spoken to regarding it again). I did access my medical records recently and found new information in terms of a MASH meeting document & that the general consensus of all agencies that I was a victim of abuse and was highly vulnerable due to my fragile health & my severe hearing loss and it was decided by agencies that I would have a high risk of exploitation again in the future.

You may be asking why am I all of a sudden digging up old ghosts now; I was contacted by the individuals who exploited me via social media around a year or two ago when I was about 17 with some horrible cryptic sexual messages. I blocked them and deleted the messages as I was scared of going through it all again.
This has made me worry about what the result of that investigation was and if they got any repercussions as I worry that they may not have due to the fact that they felt so comfortable contacting me again with such messages. I have spent the last part of two years since stressing that they may reach out again and what the repercussions it could have on my life.

So my question is that is it really worth it digging up a subject of access request (if it’s possible really?) or am I just going to waste everyone’s time?

I work at the deli department and I was closing on my own. I’ve only been here for a week.

I put all the meats away and closed the snacks counter in the time it needed to be shut and I was washing the dishes & logging from the salad bar.
An older lady came around to the counter and started to demand that I give her a kebab, whilst I was at the sink washing.
I very nicely said that we were unfortunately closed but we open again at 9am and would be able to give her the kebabs she wanted.

She started ranting and raving and swearing at me and then stormed off so I went back to doing the dishes. Then like 15 mins afterwards, she came back with the head of store and i was basically demanded to open the counter again just for her meaning that I would be behind on closing and finishing late.

I feel a little bit undermined and annoyed that she did that, but i don’t know if i am in the wrong for telling her that we were shut? Was I supposed to open the counter again?

I am exhausted, 20F with childhood eczema. It never used to be this bad and has only gotten worse since COVID.

I have it everywhere. My face, neck, shoulders, upper and lower arms, armpits, hips, breasts, torso, legs, buttocks.
I sit down and it is excruciating, I stand, excruciating. Sleep is impossible, it gets to the point where i’m so exhausted, I fall asleep all the time.

I have had multiple appointments with the GP (England) basically begging them to look at the eczema and for them to do more. They don’t even look at it. As soon as I say the word “eczema” they look straight to their computer, start typing and immediately print off a prescription for a stronger topical steroid along with emollients and send me to the pharmacy. I’ve even had doctors who stop me while i’m in the middle of explaining how I feel and say “okay we’ll just put you on a stronger steroid then”
I go through these tubes of steroids in less than a week because it’s the only way i notice a tiny difference, then it takes ages for the pharmacy to restock so i’m left for weeks and weeks without it.

I’m currently on a very potent steroid, I use moisturisers daily, I only take cold showers, i don’t use soap, i only use prescription ones.
I take food diaries, I take allergy medications as i’m allergic to dust mites, animal dander, timothy grass & mould.

I have gotten to a point where I would genuinely rather take my own life than to suffer daily and not be listened to.

Hi, (20F) I relied on childline heavily as a teenager as I went through some traumatic events and found their 24/7 chat services & quick emails to be really supportive!
However, I found that once I’ve grown out of childline, my needs haven’t changed but the support has.

I don’t think I’ve found a SINGLE service that has 24/7 chat lines that wasn’t a crisis service. Emails are slow too and the range of activities on the websites are very limited (e.g i used the art feature on childline and was able to show the counsellors on there as i struggle to verbalise). Callers & counsellors on the chat lines are so much more colder on other services than childline, they feel so much more scripted and quite frankly desperate to get you off the line. I massively understand that they are underfunded and the whole adult mental health services is too, and i don’t have any qualms about any specific individuals but it just feels like the humanity is lost here..?

This change made it so incredibly hard to leave childline and what sucks is that, I still feel the exact same as the scared 13 year old and the fact that i lost this service just because of my age was truly a bitter pill to swallow.
I have experiences of moving to adult services as I’m a lifelong patient at my audiology centre and I actually felt like i got MORE support as they gave me new ways to seek support in terms of my hearing loss.

The best i’ve found so far is Kooth (Soluna now) but they don’t have 24/7 chat lines which suck because I really struggle during the night times compared to the day as I have really poor sleep and have been diagnosed with a sleep disorder for over 10 years & activities are limited too.

I would massively appreciate some recommendations for mental health support services that I could use while I build up the courage to see my GP.

Hi. Sorry this is long but i’ve been dealing with this for years and im tired, 20F here and I was sexually exploited as a 13 year old and had School involved who honestly treated me awfully and to basically sum it up, told me that I was not very ladylike and pulled disgusted faces at me when I was forced to tell them what happened. In the end, Police got involved and I had to give an interview, I don’t know what the end result of it was, the last thing I know about it was one of the officers saying to me that they’ll ring up and that never happened or it did, just that no one told me.

(i did access my medical records recently and found documents of a MASH meeting they made about me and the consensus that they made about me that I was vulnerable and that all agencies believed that I was at a high risk of being exploited as an adult again). This definitely made me feel like shit to read.

This happened just before COVID so when lockdown came, you can imagine me trying to deal with this by myself because I was so genuinely embarrassed and angry with myself for even saying anything to anyone so I ran away from home so was placed on a S136.

To spare you the details because I still feel a lot of shame around it, I basically lied to the mental health assessors because I felt so so embarrassed and guilty and I was basically terrified of how people would see me, I couldn’t even look at anyone in the eyes, I just kept my head down.

My family basically made fun of me for it, i remember specially one person grabbed the evidence bag that the police put my things inside and was taking pictures of it and posting it on her snapchat story to her friends. I locked myself into the conservatory because I was overwhelmed and this individual climbed through the window and chased me through the house, everyone was laughing at me even though I was terrified and was sobbing. They make some nasty offhand comments about people we know who have had mental health crisis’ and just about mental health itself,
basically using words like “crazy”, “freaks” etc.

During this, my parents would use the crisis team as a threat. If i misbehaved or whatever, they’d tell me that they’d ring up the crisis team. I did have like 1 therapy appointment but this was COVID and it was a phone call which is useless to me because i’m Deaf and so my mum was just answering for me and so i lied about how i felt because she was standing next to me.

I locked myself into rooms a lot at that time.

I passed all my GCSEs afterwards with some grade 7s and one mark of a 8 (an another whole story that i don’t have time to get through with an another CAMHS referral that went nowhere), i have no idea how i did that.

I thought after leaving school, everything would go to normal. How wrong was I.
I still had panic attacks in college, I would cry and cry in the toilets before lessons, I’d turn up late and fall asleep everyday.
Just before A-Levels (2024), the individual who exploited me at 13, started to send me and my college friends messages. Still don’t know how she found us, I believe through extensive stalking.
The messages were incredibly sexual in nature and it just brought everything back for me but thankfully at 16, I saw what was happening and told everyone to block her and to not engage at all, I wish i did tell someone about this, even Police so something could’ve been done regarding her as it was clear she felt no remorse and that she was willing to take advantage of me again but i was so embarrassed yet again so I said nothing and it’s definitely too late now as the messages are long gone as i purged them because I was terrified.

My A-Levels were definitely affected and I came out with a pathetic C, C and D.

In uni now, and I’m doing a Human Biology degree with foundation year, I’m doing well academically with getting 1st classes and some 2:2s.
Last year, I basically just tried to forget everything that happened in this last 7 years and spent all my time socially with friends and this involved in drinking, doing risky things, whatever. Things were going well, but winter came and I just absolutely crashed. I couldn’t even sleep in my bed so I’d lay on my bedroom floor for i don’t know how long, it must have been months. I’d stopped eating and only ate snacks from the vending machine if i started to pass out too much. I got a lot of attendance warnings from uni at that time.

Im terrified of reaching out, of how people will view me. I don’t want to be seen as a crazy person, I don’t want people to see me as the person with “issues”. I’m scared of having appointment letters sent to my house because my parents want to know about any posts i get and they ask a lot of questions.
They’re 70+ so they came from a generation and an era where weaknesses was not accepted and anyone who were “different” was outcasted. They definitely carry this view into the modern age.

Hi. so sorry if this isn’t in the right sub but idk where else to go, I’m 20F and I’ve been dealing with depressive symptoms for a long time with multiple times of crisis as a young teenager that required intervention from School, Police & A&E. (Mental illness & severe personality disorders do run in my family & I have a very complicated physical health history)

I dodged any type of diagnoses, therapy, support etc. due to being told to avoid getting any type of mental health diagnosis by family members as in their experiences they found that getting their mental health diagnosis was the worst thing that they had ever done as symptoms that were as a result of serious medical conditions were either ignored or completely disregarded by GPs because of their mental health history in their record.

This is genuinely my worst fear of having something serious ignored and dying as a result of it so for years i’ve basically suppressed any types of emotions I feel and all my friendships and relationships always break down and are never long-lasting.

My problem is that things are getting too much for me and this time around things are different, as i’m in University and have spent most of first year in student accommodation lying on my bedroom floor and not eating which resulted in near fainting episodes and so I’d stagger desperately to the lifts just to get a snack from the vending machine.
Imagine months and months of this, alongside daily drinking and participating in risky behaviours with friends who basically dragged me out, you can imagine that I would develop some dark, scary thoughts and non-stop browsing through certain “advice” forums (I’m being purposely vague as I don’t want others to come across it)

I would have thought since coming home for the summer, things would go back to my baseline of normal but it hasn’t and going into the next year of uni scares me a little because how long would it take for things to basically reach a crisis point ..?

This week, I finally spoke to my family about how things are and the reaction I got was one of anger and shame and the message I got was to shut up, stay away from the NHS about it and figure something out for yourself. I have always used online chat support services thing (think of things like childline when i was a kid) and yeah it’s nice but it feels like a script and when i do the things they ask nothing really changes and they always say that they can see i’m trying but there’s not much that they can offer me.

Hi with uni starting again soon, is anyone else feeling glad and happy for it to be back so you can be away from home?

My parents, who are 70+ and while i do love them, can be exhausting as they have very little patience and get angry and yell a lot over little things. I’ve not been out much this summer apart from work because they give me the silent treatment and huff and roll their eyes at me if i go out with friends so ive lost a lot of friends I got in first year.

Im transferring my course so im starting all over again so im a little nervous about having to go through the whole process of meeting new people again.
At least going back to uni, I have more freedom to live my life without feeling like i need permission all the time!

Hi! 20F, and as well as eczema, I also suffer from hay fever and asthma!
I break out in hives daily, some small and some big ones (have had one covering my entire lower arm) and get tingling sensations all over including mouth and throat. I manage my eczema with topical steroids but this is only management as, as soon as i stop or run out, it all comes back again. I have brought this up with the GP about my frustrations and whether if i could get a dermatology referral but all I get are new prescriptions for higher-content steroid creams and so i’m currently on a very strong topical steroid.

I have had a basic allergy test as I have allergy & infection prone asthma that tested for house dust mites, animal dander, timothy grass, aspergillus and mould. All of which came back with me being severely allergic.

I run a very strict schedule in my home in avoiding these allergens, no pets, requiring anyone who has pets to put on clean clothes and washing hands before they come into my home (I have very nearly died from an asthma attack due to pet hair and strong perfumes), and more.

I run a food diary, replaced any skin care products with prescription ones that are non-scented, with nothing working. I feel like i’m just trying absolutely everything they’re telling me to do and nothing is changing. I’m at my wits end.

I brought this up to my asthma nurse in my yearly asthma review about my hives and she basically said that I have to take MULTIPLE pictures of any big hives before i attempt to make any type of appointment relating to it as my pictures of the hives I already have, are just too small and I will not be taken seriously and essentially fobbed off. She basically said that it is extremely difficult to get an in-depth allergy test and that I shouldn’t hope for anything.

This is basically now a luck game of me waiting everyday taking any pictures I have and hoping that something big will come up. It makes me sad that I have to essentially suffer and get worse before I am taken seriously.
I’m not the only one who struggles to be taken seriously by the NHS and have had multiple family members having to sacrifice months and months worth of wages to be seen by a private doctor and to run tests, to only end up in hospital due to conditions that have been ignored by NHS GPs.

I love the NHS and wouldn’t get rid of it for the world and understand that it is very overstretched with 14 years of austerity and underfunding but surely something has to change.

Hi! 20F, and as well as eczema, I also suffer from hay fever and asthma!
I break out in hives daily, some small and some big ones (have had one covering my entire lower arm) and I manage my eczema with topical steroids but this is only management as, as soon as i stop or run out, it all comes back again. I have brought this up with the GP about my frustrations and all I get are new prescriptions for higher-content steroid creams and so i’m currently on a very strong topical steroid (Clobetasol 0.05%).

I have had a basic allergy test as I have allergy & infection prone asthma that tested for house dust mites, animal dander, timothy grass, aspergillus and mould. All of which came back with me being severely allergic.

I run a very strict schedule in my home in avoiding these allergens, no pets, requiring anyone who has pets to put on clean clothes and washing hands before they come into my home (I have very nearly died from an asthma attack due to pet hair and strong perfumes), and more.

I run a food diary, replaced any skin care products with prescription ones that are non-scented. I feel like i’m just at my wits end.
I brought this up to my asthma nurse in my yearly asthma review about my hives issues and she basically said that I have to take MULTIPLE pictures of any big ones before i attempt to make any type of appointment relating to it as my pictures of the hives I already have, are just too small and I will not be taken seriously and essentially fobbed off. She basically said that it is extremely difficult to get an in-depth allergy test and that I shouldn’t hope for anything.
This is basically now a luck game of me waiting everyday taking any pictures I have and hoping that something big will come up and I feel like this shouldn’t be this way.

I love the NHS, but God, they are honestly awful in managing chronic conditions.

Hi! i’m 20F and just passed my test in February, I have a 2015 Fiesta and I’ve just had to get it taken to the garage due to a awful rattling noise, a pulling back-and-forth sensation when going up to speed and oil light.
The garage found a degraded wet belt and a blown head gasket and has said it needs a completely new engine.
They described the car as otherwise in very very good condition with 50k mileage.

However, with added labour costs I have been priced at £3000, the same value I bought the car for.

On one side, my parents say, go for it and we’ll help you to pay the costs which is very very generous but i feel extremely lucky and guilty that they’ve considered that.

One an another side, my sister’s boyfriend said, don’t pay for it, you’re basically paying the same of what the car is worth and that i’m better off getting it towed to an another garage and getting it done cheaper.

I only have just under £3000 and cannot afford an another car and the options aren’t great.

It just passed its MOT like 3 weeks ago and i just got a new job, hoping to build a bit more money, this is the worst timing hahaha 😭
(keep in mind, before you say bank of mum and dad, i’ve paid for absolutely everything to do with the car AND my driving lessons & test)

I’m at a standstill of everyone telling me different things and it’s honestly so stressful to try and figure out what the best option is for me.

Hi! i’m 20F and just passed my test in February, I have a 2015 Fiesta and I’ve just had to get it taken to the garage due to a awful rattling noise, a pulling back-and-forth sensation when going up to speed and oil light.
The garage found a degraded wet belt and a blown head gasket and has said it needs a completely new engine.
They described the car as otherwise in very very good condition with 50k mileage.

However, with added labour costs I have been priced at £3000, the same value I bought the car for.

On one side, my parents say, go for it and we’ll help you to pay the costs which is very very generous but i feel extremely lucky and guilty that they’ve considered that.

One an another side, my sister’s boyfriend said, don’t pay for it, you’re basically paying the same of what the car is worth and that i’m better off getting it towed to an another garage and getting it done cheaper.

I only have just under £3000 and cannot afford an another car and the options aren’t great.

It just passed its MOT like 3 weeks ago and i just got a new job, hoping to build a bit more money, this is the worst timing hahaha 😭
(keep in mind, before you say bank of mum and dad, i’ve paid for absolutely everything to do with the car AND my driving lessons & test)

I’m at a standstill of everyone telling me different things and it’s honestly so stressful to try and figure out what the best option is for me.

hello! 20F here with profound bilateral sensorineural hearing loss with just one cochlear implant!
i have older parents and i started to notice my dad was getting symptoms of hearing loss so i encouraged him to go and get seen and he was diagnosed with mild hearing loss in both ears.
He received 2 hearing aids and he was so embarrassed to have them and while i understand where he comes from, it’s a new thing to him, it hurts me a little.. like, i’ve lived with this my entire life and he sees it as embarrassing. I do my best to relate with each other - struggling in crowds, people mumbling etc - so he could feel a bit more at ease with his new hearing aids.

I don’t feel upset towards him at all for feeling this way, he’s 70+ and it’s a lot for him, it was just a little sting in my heart. is there any other way i could help him feel a little more comfortable with it