r/CougarsAndCubs

I’m 23 and I work with this woman who is 49 I know it might be nothing but sometimes I feel like she’s into me. First she will touch my shoulder a lot when talking or walking by or if she’s walking infront of me from a distance she will turn around to look at me just really quick and then keep walking I don’t think she thinks I’m a creep which is why it’s weird. Also she will stand really close to me like almost shoulders touching if I have to show her something work related or if we’re talking she will put her hair behind her shoulder exposing her neck and she only does it with me or if I tell a joke she will start giggling like a kid touching my arms

im 24 and I have this coworker who I spend a lot of time goofing off with. she's 40 but she acts just like me so naturally she became my closest friend at work. sometimes she'll tease me about when im going to find a girl, she comments on what i wear if i show up in something new. she'll grab my hair and pull it and then one time she bit my shoulder but idk if thats flirting or her just being odd. i have a hugeeeee thing for older women but i dont wanna like make a move and make things awkward if she's just being friendly. also im sure older women would rather make the move on a younger man right ?

Not much to say just the same as usual, am M/29 in case anyone wonders. Is getting tiresome for real

So I’m 28 dating a 45 year old, I do want a one child of my own, but she’s on the fence about it. Issue is I really do love her a lot and would love to start a family with her. I do have two jobs, but I don’t have a career.

As of this year, I’m 38, and I think I still look pretty good for my age. I take care of myself, I’m educated, established, and generally have my life together.

Over the past year or so, I’ve had about three casual hookups/week-to-week flings with guys in their early to mid-20s. One was a successful computer engineer who basically ghosted me after we slept together. The other two were actually really nice to me, didn’t ghost me initially, and we saw each other multiple times. But all of them eventually disappeared around the third week.

The thing is, I don’t necessarily want to date these guys either. Obviously, there can be pretty significant financial and life-stage differences between a 38-year-old and someone in their early 20s, and I’m realistic about that. But I do enjoy their company and would be perfectly happy to stay in touch, keep seeing each other casually, or just maintain some kind of friendship.

Instead, it seems like once we hit around week three, they just completely disappear.

So I’m wondering: is this simply a life-stage/age-gap thing?

I’m obviously in a very different place in life than someone in their early 20s. I’m established, more educated than these guys, financially independent, etc., while they’re still figuring out what they want out of life.

I’m not expecting a 22-year-old to want to settle down with a 38-year-old. I’m just curious why even the casual situations seem to have such a short shelf life.

Is this just what happens when you’re dating/hooking up with guys that much younger, or am I doing something that causes them to lose interest after a few weeks?

I (32F) am dating a man 7 years younger than me (25M) and feeling uneasy about our future.

We’ve been together 3 years & the age gap has never really been a problem. We have so many common interests, he’s incredibly mature for his age, is an amazing communicator & partner, & is the love of my life.

However, recently he has been struggling with the fact that he doesn’t feel ready for kids or marriage. A lot of my friends (& his) are getting married & settling down/having kids, & he feels a lot of pressure to do the same, even though I’ve never put this pressure on him. I do want to have kids, but I’m not ready for them yet nor in a rush to have them. He is feeling super hesitant about the future because he doesn’t want to put me in a situation where he’s still not ready for kids in 5-6 years which puts me at 37-38, which is on the later side of my personal ‘having kids’ window. I am open to having kids later, but he’s scared he won’t be ready when I am & doesn’t want that to cause our relationship to fail & then me end up being 38 & single.

We’ve decided to take a break to give ourselves a chance to truly think through the compromises we both will have to make if we decide to stay together & take the next step.

Have any of you been in a similar situation? Did you stay together? Did it work out? Personally I want to take the leap because he is the one for me & I want to spend the rest of my life with him. He is blossoming in his career & has so much ahead of him, & I also don’t want him to feel like I am holding him back or impacting his freedom/future in any way down the line.

tl;dr my boyfriend is unsure if he will want to have kids & with me being 7yrs older, my biological clock is ticking & if we stay together he will become a dad at a younger age than he’d ideally like

First off, this post is not meant to come off as judgmental in any way. I am genuinely curious.

I was combing through the subreddit and saw some stories about cougars dating cubs / kittens that were in the age range of 18 - 22 years old. I thought to myself and wondered about the dynamics of that relationship.

For the women that dated someone in the 18 - 22 years of age demographic:

• What about them did you find attractive?
• Did you / how did you overcome the age aspect?
• What was the relationship dynamic like? Benefits? Challenges? What did their family think?
• What is the status of yalls relationship now? If it ended, how did it end?

Does it mean like you’ve been hit on by older women or vice versa, is it the actual age gap itself (my reasoning), is it after you found out their age like what exactly makes a cub a cub please shed some insight I’m confused

What qualities stand out most to you when dating someone older/younger vs closer to your age?

I (25M) having been dating a woman much older than me (47F) for almost a year now - it has been my most fulfilling relationship! I enjoy spending every moment with her, having laughs and going on trips together. Things feel so natural between us, but there’s definitely things that stand out in our relationship than I’ve had in previous relationships. Prior to her, I’ve been in two long-term relationships with girls who were both my age. I was curious to know what have been some of the biggest differences in age gap dating, whether it’s been a positive or negative…..or just different!

The most prominent for me has been maturity…..seems obvious enough haha. I feel like whenever I talk to my lady, we are having real conversations. We can pick up where we left off with the same energy, remember every detail about each other, and be meaningful in the words we say. There’s less flakiness or changing minds, and if something happens to that effect we are good at communicating if we are feeling off or uncomfortable. I truthfully feel more at ease whenever I have something important to say, knowing she will hear me out rather than jump to conclusions.

Confidence is another thing, kinda goes back to my previous point. She will lay out what she wants or how she is feeling. I really respect her for just speaking her mind. That’s not to see we weren’t nervous wrecks when we first started seeing each other! But I like that she is much more grounded and that I can be the same. She likes it when I am confident and act naturally rather than put on a macho act or anything like that!

I won’t dive too much into the sex life, but I will say I’ve never felt sooooooo fulfilled! This is definitely a major part of our relationship, can’t denied great sex is powerful. But we also can just cuddle up and be close to each other physically like laying on the couch, there’s no nerves or anything.

Got ghosted by someone who i was chatting with for a while, was even going to visit soon. Thought he respected me at least on a friendship level and that he was better than that. I was wrong. Lesson learned..
Fool me twice shame on me 😔

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Just ranting

Im an attractive 47 yr old and I get hit on by younger men a lot. However, I can never find a younger man who wants to actually date me. I feel like all I am now is a fetish. Are there any younger men who want an actual relationship with an older woman? Like hypothetically speaking...

Met her on Bumble. I do have a thing for older women but never had the opportunity till now. We’re just grabbing coffee. We seem to have similar interests and hobbies. Health and fitness, being active outdoors, etc. Any advice or what to expect?

I’m a 24M and just wanted to know if older women are generally picky when it comes to body types. Like is there a specific preference if they prefer muscular or slimmer guys?

For context I'm a 32M who used to be obese. Spent the last 4 yrs working on myself & I'm in the best shape of my life. My cougar (who's overweight) wants to call it off because she's insecure of my physique now.

Not sure how to process this, is it really a thing? Or she just wants out?

I just want to share a funny story that this community can laugh at. My bf and I were in Vegas this past wkend and we were walking when we saw a novelty/sex shop and decided to detour in. There were only 3 women in there and one says “I need DOBs to make sure you two are old enough to be in here.”

I say 1976 and he says 1996. She repeats and then says, Woah, who is 76 and who is 96?! I laughed and said I was 76 and she loudly calls to the other two ladies in the store, “We’ve got us a cougar in the house!!!” Lollll 🫣🫣😂😂

The other two started cheering, my BF and I just laughed. I felt maybe a tiny bit embarrassed, but he came over right away and said Yes, this here is my Lil Cougar and I felt all better 🥰

I’m still laughing thinking about it. 🐅🐅😂😂

Anyone else been called out in public??