23 M here.

I just lost 6k on a cruise. I wasnt going to even be able to lose that much until I found out that room charges arent cash advances and I can just charge money to the room.

I didnt max out any credit cards. But I will have 6k on one because of this gambling problem on the cruise. with a 10k limit im gonna work religious to try and pay down. The 28% APR scares me.

I feel alone, I feel ashamed, and I feel like a failure as a man and a failure as a son to my dad because I broke my promise of no gambling to him.

It was an endless cycle. I won more than enough to be liquid or 100 dollars in debt multiple times and i just couldnt stop. It just kept itching and itching and itching me....

I want to fix myself and be better but dont even know how to begin. I want to start going to Gamblers anonymous meetings. But I need other resources.

I think im gonna put my dad in charge of my finances as well.

My brother had asked for money a few months back and I refused twice.. now he won’t talk to me?? I’m married and I travelled 1000km because his haemoglobin is low at 5.6 and he won’t even look at me. I’m here to take care of him since he’s not on talking terms with mom! He’s 33 and has multiple addictions alcohol, gambling, tobacco. What should I do? I’m trying be practical and not get hurt since I’m also emotionally sensitive after a miscarriage and other issues in life. But it hurts doing the right thing no? It’s like I care for him and give him no money and he’s angry at me? Wow

Also what is rock bottom? He’s been suicidal in the past so I’m more worried obviously!

I'm honestly at my wits end... I've relapsed a million times over the last 10 years and I just can't seem to stop. I keep trying to be a winning poker player for side income and I'm failing over and over because of tilt. I lost my life savings of $5000 in a single night like a sick crackhead... I was just playing some small $50 tables of online poker, but I kept getting unlucky and lost like 15+ in a row. This drove me mad. I went to the $100 table, lost, then $200, $400, $1000 and then $2000. All of a sudden I’m at the highest stakes possible. What the fuck is going on? I lost all of them!! My anger spiraled out of control and I kept depositing until my bank hit 0. I kept depositing more in hopes of a recovery. It's like a sick joke. I can't stop until everythings gone because every last dollar might just be the big win to my fucked up brain...

I always double down when I lose becaus the pain is unbearable when you lose big. I need to win it back to stop the pain. I CANT STOP THE PAIN IF I STOP PLAYING... I feel like an idiot... I really hate myself and want to end it all. I am so sorry to my partner who I've betrayed by losing everything without you knowing once again... I am so sorry... I don't know what to do... I'm so depressed and empty that I don't smile at work or care about anything anymore...

I am turning 30 this week on friday and my birthday is completely ruined... I can't do this anymore... I've lost the will to live. I am a pathetic failure who can't even control oneself. My relapses are always caused by anger from losing in poker. I don't fucking want to play poker or gamble anymore. I am honestly so sick and tired of losing my sanity and then ending up broke over and OVER AGAIN. FUCK. Fuck this shit. Enough is enough. Even if I can win a couple hundred playing good it doesn't mean shit when I can lose my temper then dump back thousands! This makes no fucking sense. Fuck gambling. I'm fucking done. I'm 30 now and I need to fucking grow up for fucks sake.

I am fucking done betting. I can turn this ship around. All the money I’ve wasted on this awful fucking activity. I have the will to stop this shit - I am tired of relapsing every other month. I’m tired of the damage I’m doing to myself mentally and physically.

I’m at the point that I am ‘bored’ of losing. I don’t even want to deposit nor place another bet. It’s weird feeling that I’ve never experienced.

So here’s to my day one of no gambling tomorrow. One small step at a time.

Day 3 done!
Cannot wait to completely forget about this addiction!

Hi,

I don’t know why I am writing this and not really looking for any responses either. Maybe just a final vent before leaving, or a warning to anyone starting to struggle with gambling.

I have gambled every single day for the last 16 years. Not one day off, always found the money to play with. I have debts upon debts, and I would never be able to pay even a fraction of them back. We are talking really high six figure debts. To top this off, I am unemployed, have been for years, and unable to work due to my health.

Have already lost everyone close to me, I have no friends left or no close family members.

This is just the end of the road for me. I have tried everything throughout the years, without anything being succesful. I have tried blocking softwares, therapy, groups and medication. None of which have helped me stay off gambling for even a single day. I have also given over my finances to someone close to me in the past, that just made me steal money and lie even more, just to get money to gamble with, and again, no days off gambling.

I guess I hope that this post could reach someone in the future who is on the verge of an addiction and would help them quit, it is unfortunately too late for me.

I came here to write this because not many people understand how bad a gambling addiction can be. I'm happy to say that I officially deleted my sports betting app today. I have relapsed multiple times though, but I'm trying to stay strong. It's so hard to break the cycle when your bank account is in a negative balance. I feel like if I could just get ahead of my finances, then I wouldn't feel the "need" to gamble. I feel like I do it out of desperation. Due to gambling, my bank account is -$1000. My paycheck then comes in and puts the account to a zero balance. Then my bills come out and my account goes back to -$1000. It's fu*king embarrassing that I can't even go to the store to buy groceries. I just needed to vent to people who may understand what I am going through.

I used to be someone who usually bets on sports, but I started playing blackjack a month ago. I've had wins and losses, but exactly a week ago, I had an eye-opening experience. In a five-hour period, I played blackjack non-stop and increased my balance from 13k USD to 248k USD. As you can imagine, I didn't stop and lost almost all of my balance.

This experience showed me that, at least for me, it's not about making money, but about escaping the stresses of life and releasing dopamine.

If you win, it won't be enough; you'll keep playing. If you lose, you'll keep playing to make up for it. Don't waste your time and quit gambling.

(Most of us) can't gamble if we don't have the funds. I'm telling you, nothing squashes "the itch" like realizing you only have $112 to your name. The key of course, is to have access to emergency funds on a time release basis, think of it like a bank safe. The robber is a degen gambler like you and I, but can't get the money for a day or two so they'll give up. Heck, even if you have to wire the funds in an emergency should be sufficient - I do wish there was a credit card or gift card with a VISA logo that maybe doesn't work online anywhere that you can also use for regular purchases, but have yet to figure that out.

Regardless, move your salary to a liquid CD or bank that only has ACH and no Zelle, etc. and you literally have nothing to gamble with!

Just signed up to pay off six accounts totaling about 16,000. My payment is 150.00 bi weekly. 4 credit cards and two payday loans are included. Anybody have a good or bad experience using JG Wentworth and is this a smart move? Have no savings or emergency funds due to massive gambling addiction. Thank you

I genuinely don’t know what to do about my father anymore and I need outside opinions because my emotions are all over the place.

Growing up, we basically never had money. My childhood was constant financial stress. We lost our house, were always in debt, and there were times we literally did not have food in the house. The second I started working, my dad started taking my money to “help support us.” This went on for years. Eventually things got so bad he got evicted and I had to move out and live with my mom.

What confuses me is that he actually makes/made a good salary. That’s why my family thinks he has a gambling problem. I’ve personally never seen him gamble, and part of me feels guilty even thinking that about my own father, but I honestly don’t know what else explains the constant financial disasters. He is ALWAYS broke or in some emergency despite making good money. There’s always a reason: his car broke down, he’s on sick leave, work issues, debt, unexpected expenses, etc. He constantly asks me for money even now that I don’t live with him anymore.

I’m conflicted because I don’t know if he’s truly a gambling addict, financially irresponsible, manipulative, or just someone who genuinely cannot manage his life. My mom, grandmother, and other family members are convinced he gambles and say he was emotionally, financially, and sometimes physically abusive toward my mom during their relationship. But because I never actually caught him gambling myself, part of me keeps doubting whether I’m being unfair.

On top of that, I feel like he’s emotionally manipulative. Any time I question him about money or ask why he never has savings, he guilt trips me about everything he did for me as a father. He sends long messages about sacrifices he made, how ungrateful I am, how I “lost the person who loved me the most,” etc.

Part of me feels guilty because he IS my father and I know he struggled in life. Another part of me is angry because I feel like I spent my entire childhood carrying stress that shouldn’t have been on a kid. I also feel like he uses guilt instead of taking accountability.

The biggest question I have is: should I cut him off completely or try to keep some type of relationship with boundaries? I no longer live with him and I don’t financially depend on him at all anymore. I just don’t know if keeping contact with someone like this is hurting me more than helping me.

And for people who’ve dealt with gambling addiction in family members: is it common to never actually SEE the gambling itself, but constantly see the financial chaos around it? What would you do in my situation?

Gamban, Cold Turkey, BetBlocker.... they all have an uninstall option, a "trust this site" switch, or a process you can just stop. And in a few minutes, I find the bypass. If you're reading this, you probably know the feeling....

So: how do you make tearing the block down take longer than an urge actually lasts? Even for an engineer?

github.com/stayout-gambling/stayout-gambling

macOS and iOS working. Windows is the next priority. PRs welcome.

I check the repo every Sunday.

Removing access is the single most evidence-supported intervention for compulsive behaviour, and the time it buys you is time you get back for the stuff that actually matters.

​

​Hey everyone. I have a story to share.

​I’ve gambled most of my life. I’m 43 now, but it started back in the late 80s/early 90s at the racetrack with my uncle. He’d give me $20, and the tellers would take my bets because they thought a kid betting on horses was cute. Obviously, I never won just guessing horses based on their names, but I remember the immediate urge to just keep trying. I’d ask him for more, but he’d usually cut me off. When I stayed at his place, I remember asking him to rent a Super Nintendo just so I could play the casino games. I’d spend hours playing blackjack on a screen.

​Fast forward to when I turned 18. I moved to Calgary, was legally allowed in casinos, and the cycle really started. I would go and lose everything I had, week after week.

​Eventually, I got into poker. I could win, but the reality is that if you never stop, you inevitably run into bad beats. People love to say poker isn't gambling, that it's pure skill, but I completely disagree. When you can have a 95% mathematical advantage, be forced to commit everything you have, and still lose on that 5% outlier... that’s gambling.

​I was doing okay for a while, but then COVID hit. I got into crypto. I didn't think Bitcoin was going to take off so I started day-trading altcoins. I treated it exactly like a casino, and I lost.

​Last year, my mom passed away. The exact same night she passed, I won $100,000 online. I found out I had about $140k coming to me from an inheritance. Deep down, I knew winning that money wasn't a gift; it felt like a trap designed to prime me to blow the inheritance.

​At first, things went "well." I kept winning up to around $140k. I paid off my car, cleared all my debts, and had about $120k left over. But my bet sizes spiked. I was wagering $1,000 a spin. I went to a physical casino, tracked my play, and was up another $12,000.

​Then the trap sprung. In the single month it took for my inheritance to actually clear, I gave almost all of my winnings back.

​Where I Am Today

​As I sit here writing this, I have around $75k left of my actual inheritance. I just self-banned from yet another random online casino. I know I have exactly two options: continue down this road and lose every single cent left, or stop right now. I know the rational choice.

​This is where I want to pivot my energy. I've been lurking on this sub for a while, and I want to start a YouTube channel dedicated to exposing how predatory the gambling world is, the tactics they use. My goal is to put my energy into stopping people from ever trying it in the first place.

​I want to share stories from people in the community (with absolute anonymity and explicit permission only). I’m not looking to identify anyone. I want to know if anyone here would be interested in collaborating, sharing ideas, or letting me tell their stories to help warn others.

If anyone wants to contribute to the project please let me know I tend to have a hard time with this stuff I'm not a great video editor or story teller but I know what I want to say. I'd be interested in finding others that want to help others instead of hurting themselves

​Thanks for reading. One day at a time and no matter where you are up money or down the only answer is to stop. Deep down I think we all inherently know that.

Day 1 completed! I don’t even know how the day passed , feeling horrible, stressed and anxious.
Maybe it will get better tomorrow.
At least i wasn’t stressed about the odds this tims.

Will try to anonimyze as much info as I can here. I am 30F, engaged to be married to 30M. My uncle 45M inherited half of my childhood family home and is currently living in it estranged from the rest of the family due to his issues. His half of the house is insurance for some of his loans and the only way to get it back is to buy off some of his micro loans, which are not a lot but a blocker for it to go on market. As a family member, I'd be able to do that per local laws.

When my grandmother, his bio mom but a "in role" mom of all of us in the close family circle, died in 2022, the entire family went no contact with him, myself included. Blamed her death on him. Me, on the other hand: I have been trying to get him help, but he was angry with me and kept spewing hurtful things literally just to hurt my feelings whenever I'd touch on the subject, so I went NC for my own mental health. I co-own the other half of the house.

A VERY BRIEF BACKGROUND of him:

\- He started using back in 2010, xanax. This was when he was depressed. Went on to become an alcoholic

Started gambling online and doing harder drugs in 2011. He fell into the wrong crowd and had a great job, so he had a lot of money and time to splurge, and what happened - happened.

\- He now has a job where his license was at risk to be taken away multiple times with his arrests (3-4 arrests related to drugs, but it was either his possession within the limits of "personal use" or he was caught in a car with people who had drugs on them, so minor misdemeanors = however, he's been stacking them which could grow into something more), but because my grandparents were pretty influential people in the community, people kinda keep covering up for him.

\- He has maxed out all of his loan capabilities plus he owes thousands to multiple close family, friends, and neighbors.

The house is a two-story house with two separate flats and a giant yard. After nearly 4 years NC, I'm now considering also buying off the other half of the house under a signed agreement that he still gets to live in one of the flats, and that I would provide housing/shelter for him for the rest of his life. I have selfish reasons, to be frank; I want to be able to return to my childhood home and make it a place of joy again, I do co own it after all. The other 50% of my reasoning, though; I feel like I still owe it to my grandparents to not give up on him. He was also like a brother to me, and not a day in these four years has passed where I didn't ask myself if I could have done more.

To add more detail, what I did do in years prior to going NC:

\- Contact all people who were ever close to him to disclose his addiction (with a request of discreetness, of course) and ask them to no longer send him money,

\- had long sessions with my grandmother guided by my therapist (she didn't want to go herself, and when she gave in she sadly passed),

\- tried talking to him and reasoning with him in about a million different ways (including discussing my own feelings about his addiction instead of pointing out what it's doing for him),

\- covered some of his debt and paid off some loans (in retrospect, I didn't know I was possibly enabling him),

\- contacted an addiction rehab facility and tried to enroll him multiple times, guided by their counsellors,

\- staged interventions with friends and family,

\- begged to enroll him into group Addicts Anonymous (very successful program here with high success rates, but until you get a sponsor, during the first few sessions = a friend or family member you trust needs to be with you on those meetings as an accountability partner, they say it's a prerequisite to successful sobriety idk)

The problem: he never admitted his issues, not even when confronted with evidence, like drug test results, baggies of substances, or bank statements that show the amount deposited into online casinos. He always claims they were falsified or someone is trying to set him up or whatever. I know admission is the first step towards recovery and is mandatory, but we never got to that step.

I was told he needs to lose something he truly cares about in order to be motivated to get sober. I thought when grandma passed, that would be the defining moment, and he would want to get sober for me (we were incredibly close, even through his addiction). I graduated from my MA program a week after she passed, and he missed the ceremony. I had access to his email and bank statements (something he willingly gave me for another reason years prior but forgot he did) and saw hundreds of dollars deposited to a casino. We had a huge fight and i saw red, but he wasn't even phased. A couple of weeks later with multiple incidents like these and a lot of hateful snapbacks, I went NC.

It's been almost four years, and from what I hear around in the community, he's stuck in place. Still using, still gambling. He managed to get one of my late grandma's family members to pay for his bills under the premonition that he's in debt due to her medical bills (yes I tried talking to her too, but she won't listen as he managed to manipulate her into thinking I'm making up stories about him and that I'm just hateful). Still works the same job, people still cover when he's "out of it". His entire paycheck goes toward the odd meal, gambling, weed, and amphetamines.

My (probably naive) thinking into why buying the house and covering the debt would be a good idea and not necessarily enabling:

\- He would no longer have property that could be estranged if he doesn't give back his loans. If his payments stop, he would be forced into community service to pay them back, but the property would be secured and he would have a place to come back home to.

\- I could control who comes to the house or not. Was planning on putting up security cameras and filing restraining orders if any of his junkie friends tried visiting.

If he were to revolt and crash somewhere else, he would be back sooner or later (as much emotions as he's lost, I think he's still sentimentally attached to that place, too)

\- We're planning a family. There will be Birthdays and Christmases and Easters, and part of me hopes he'd want to get clean to not miss out on them. I would offer AA as a prerequisite to be family. I obviously expect him to still slip up, I just need him to start trying.

Obviously, this goes against what I have been advised (to let him lose everything and hit rock bottom). So, I hope I'm not being offensive or hurtful by asking this question in this community, but as addicts who have admitted their addiction and are on a path to getting sober -- you may know where his head is right now much better than I do, and give me clarity I can't get right now.

Is this a good idea? Or would I be enabling him even more? If so, then what \_could\_ work, what have I not thought of?

Any POV is appreciated, thank you in advance!

Today I woke up feeling more thankful than usual after seeing how other people are living around the world.

For the past 23 days, I’ve been waking up depressed and cried a few times due to the situation I put myself in as a 29 yr old man.

Instead of making money the right way and build a family, I put myself into debt of over 20k. I live with my mom so I am really struggling mentally and financially and don’t think Ill never tell her about what I went through. I can’t afford simple things anymore because I pay interest + minimum amounts on my credit card loans. I can’t save money anymore, I can only live paycheck by paycheck which is not something I want to live.

Today is the first time I felt some sense of happiness after seeing how others are living around the world. It made me realize how I should be more thankful for having a roof over my head, clothes, food etc..

Im gamstopped

I bet through a guy i know on discord, this makes it fucking impossible to ‘block’ myself. I can just simply unblock him if i block him etc, its horrible i feel trapped idk what to do anymore i have £3000, my parents think i have about £20,000 and thats ive recovered from my gambling addiction they knew about 1 year ago. How do I cope with this folenekwlajrj GOD

I relapsed after 3 months. I feel like killing myself.lost all my money

I’m 27 years old, started gambling around 5 years ago, i forgot what happiness mean since then.
I’m in debt i have gambled all my salary for the last 6 months, tomorrow i have to pay 600€ for someone or i will have huge problems and i have 0 money on me!
I’m will be a dad in two weeks, idk what to do, how to carry on with my life. I’m depressed stressed all day.
Today, i have self excluded from all online and local casinos ( it is possible where i live ). Idk if that’s going to help or not.
May god help me and everyone else.