Trans girls aren’t the enemy
Hey y'all, I used the recent Supreme Court ruling as a springboard to talk about why I have hope for American men, even if things look bleak.
I can feel so hopeless about us sometimes—like we’re too far gone, too isolated, too anti-social. But the core of my politics and work with therapy clients is honoring the human instinct to belong. To connect. To relate.
No matter what the billionaires and billionaire-funded politicians say about human nature being competitive, we’re truly wired to cooperate. No matter what the manfluencer grifters say about men not having emotional needs—which is a lie—we need each other to survive. No matter what some people even on “my side,” the left, say about some people being “bad,” labeling them criminals, rapists, and abusers, unworthy of redemption.
Our need to belong is the very thing that people at the top of capitalism channel to get what they want. They get seduced by the power that comes with turning people against each other, which lets them off the hook for hoarding wealth and resources.
I hate to give them credit, but they’re like sorcerers of making some people think they belong by “othering” others. They encourage and amplify white supremacy and misogyny. They stoke anger and shame to keep us fighting over crumbs. They’re damn good at it.
They’ve got us men in a bind. They want us to think feminism and trans people are the reason we don’t feel like we belong. They blame “radical feminism” for everything from school shootings to rising rates of suicide by men. They ban trans girls from girls’ sports. They throw expensive combat fights on the White House lawn with jokes about Michelle Obama’s gender. They question the masculinity of political candidates who dare challenge them. They’ve introduced 804 anti-trans bills in 43 states so far this year alone.
The truth is men don’t feel like we belong right now because of them, the rich and powerful. Because of the system they orchestrate and benefit from. Because of capitalism.