r/SomaticExperiencing

Hi everyone,

I’ve been dealing with an array of nervous system related symptoms and maybe the worst one is this intense neck, jaw and shoulder pain, as well as tender muscles in most of the rest of my body. It’s not just sore but the actual tissue feels so incredibly tight and thick and almost rigid and lumpy, chiro and acupuncture always comment on how intensely hard the tissue feels and that’s when “relaxed”.

I believe this is mostly from chronic muscle guarding/body armouring and stress. But I am so scared that it’s permanent because of how abnormal it feels and how long it’s been like that- almost feels like fibrosis in the muscle in some areas.
Oh and physio, chiro, osteo etc etc haven’t helped at all so I am now trying very hard with SE and nervous system work.

Has anyone had chronically bad body pain or muscle tension that has been relieved using this work? Or any success stories about symptoms that felt permanent but managed to shift via this work.

Thank you

I’m only two sessions in. But, it’s so uncomfortable to try and notice what I feel in my body and stay with it. Probably means that I really do need this kind of therapy. Does it get less uncomfortable?

I do love my therapist though, and feel safe with her. But it’s still early and I still feel so vulnerable sharing myself in this way.

I’m traveling for the holidays and my symptoms always flare up away from home. but this is my baseline. 24/7. for years on end. I have the weirdest, most vivid dreams all night long. I wake up so nauseous and out of body. I remember every detail of the dream. but I’m severely dissociated and numb. I always have this urge to go home, but I don’t. my nervous system is so hyper vigilant and won’t drop into deep sleep.

im utterly miserable and exhausted after 5 years of this. no meds, therapy, or just living my life has helped. Im just white knuckling through every day. i cant feel panic. But occasionally I get a tiny swoosh of adrenaline. But the dpdr is so thick. I feel awful pretty much all day every day and have for many years. It’s no way to live. ive accepted this is my life. But that hasn’t even helped either. This is so deeply subconscious, I have no access to what my mind is even afraid of

I’m a dance teacher and recently quit my corporate job. I want to incorporate somatic healing in my own dance practice and be able to teach my students about it. Honestly, this will sound dramatic but dance saved my life. And I don’t think it needs to be that serious for others, but I feel so fulfilled when teaching embodied movement, especially to folks who didn’t grow up dancing. Can anyone recommend legit programs for learning more about somatic therapy and healing?

31 M. I have struggled a lot in the last 10 years with a hyper sensitized nervous system, and struggling to properly feel “self-contained” /fully embodied and grounded in my body , as if there became a duality between myself and my body, creating a lot of hyper-vigilance and tension.
This happens to be the same time period I started drinking alcohol regularly, and I don’t know how much of a correlation there is.

When you stopped alcohol for several months or longer did you notice an increased interoceptive ability to feel grounded and embodied in yourself and the feel the “container” of your body? Or no difference?

my nervous system developed existential ocd from going into a chronic dpdr state and I’ve been stuck for many years this way. I’m living my life, I’m in therapy weekly and I’m on meds. I’m getting worse, because the dissociation is getting worse over time, which sparks more existential OCD, which makes the DPDR worse. my brain is basically stuck in a loop it created with no way out.

I’ve never felt more hopeless, lost, out of body, detached from my own identity than I do now. it’s like I’ve been erased from my own mind. I’ve been taking small trips for summer which I haven’t been able to do for the last 4 years and it’s making my condition worse. I used to travel solo all over the world just 5 years ago, and now I’m trapped in my own mind. even moving to a new apartment 15 mins away, my nervous system is freaking out.

idk what to do anymore. somatic experiencing hasn’t helped because I’m so dissociated I can’t even feel my own breathing. my mind is dumping numbing chemicals to the point where I’m almost in a coma. I’ve been battling this for so long, and I’m exhausted, anyone would be. and it’s not for lack of effort, I have tried everything at this point. between the daytime suffering and the vivid weird dreams all night, I don’t get one moment of peace.

im looking for recommendations on how to deal with this or cope, because it’s becoming impossible. this is chronic 24/7. looping thoughts, severe numbness, loss of identity and memory, agoraphobia, existential OCD, no sense of time or seasons, unable to function or be present in anything.

i feel like im being punished for a crime I didn’t commit. I had a horrible childhood and then when I finally grew up and made a life for myself that I was finally happy and felt myself, I lost 2 family members. then 4 years later I had a nervous system collapse and I’ve been stuck this way ever since. this is not a life. it’s a nightmare.

Hey everyone :)

I started somatic experiencing in April this year from a severely compromised baseline. I was recovering from an unknown virus, a big event and some vaccine load before I started.

I did 3 sessions over 4 weeks, with each session resulting in big releases. Felt freezing cold. A lot of tremoring and emotional release.

After that I paused sessions for 5 weeks. I felt like I was somewhat better regulated, but my capacity was barely improved. Unable to work at all, I could barely exercise, just going for 1-2 short walks per day. Every day has been incredibly difficult dealing with fatigue and the associated fear, anxiety etc that comes along with reduced function over a long period of time.

I then did another session, this was two weeks ago. Prior to the session I could finally work once per week and then after it I had to take almost another two weeks off.

I’m kinda back to being able to work once a week, able to pay for basics but my mortgage is now overdue and I’ll have to get support from family to survive this period and keep my house 😬

Can anyone corroborate that SE can cause this much fatigue on a compromised, sensitive system? Basically 4 sessions over almost 12 weeks now. The timeline is complicated because I was also dealing with post viral fatigue (almost 4 months ago now), vaccines + large external event (3 months ago). But I’m trying to find some hope that if I keep SE paused my baseline should recover. Otherwise I’m not sure what else is continuing to cause this.

I’m booked to see a fatigue specialist in September. Otherwise I’ve just been doing gentle craniosacral therapy, eating healthy, taking my supplements and resting while trying to survive on minimal work.

Thanks!

Edit; I should say I have spoken to my therapist somewhat briefly about this and she has affirmed that it can be very energy intensive and I should listen to my body. But I’m still confused about whether this is normal or if at this intensity it’s likely not totally related to the SE

So I KNOW that certain family members love me. But it’s not the kind I need or necessarily want. It’s almost twisted. Conditional, even if they say it’s not. I’m expected to fulfill certain things, and get no appreciation. We also aren’t a touchy family, but when we do touch, it’s awkward and foreign.

I’ve been dealing with resentment, grief, feeling trapped and resigned to my fate, consequences to actions that I did not take and should never have been made responsible for, among a whole host of factors.

A lot of my strife is manifesting in body pain, particularly in my neck, shoulders, arms, and wrists. I honestly thought I was on the path to disability or fibromyalgia with the level of pain I was experiencing in my upper body.

Through therapy, my arm and shoulder issues are mostly resolved. But the neck is still an issue. There’s postural things at play, like tech neck, but I know it’s exacerbated by feeling anxious and negativity. I have to physically drop my shoulders all the time. My upper back and neck muscles are riddled with knots and adhesions.

All that to say, when I’m getting to know someone (ie hopeful) my pain lessens. I feel joy. When it doesn’t work out, as it often doesn’t, I’m emotionally spent. I wonder why get back on the horse when it goes nowhere. The pain intensifies.

I feel like I need someone to show me the kind of love I deserve. I do NOT not love myself. But it’s different when someone validates you, is there for you, is not judgemental, and provides genuine safety. Holds your hand instead of swatting it. Builds you up instead of shaming you.

How can i internalize this in the absence of someone else actually doing this for me???

I just had my first session and I’m just curious how reliable this provider is. I’ve never had one before so I don’t want to judge too quickly!

She did an assessment of my posture and pelvis. And did some maneuvering to align my pelvis. Then it was very light pressure to my tight areas. I do have a high pain tolerance. She was a physical therapist assistant and licensed massage therapist. Myofascial release is the only thing she does.

Thanks!

Hi all, could someone recommend an online somatic experiencing practitioner in UK? Unfortunately there are no practitioners in my area…

Sorry English is not my mother language so I try to my best to explain. I'm looking for someone with the same problem: chronic stiff neck caused by fight-or-flight response. My neck is tense af. It has been like that for maybe about 15 years. It started at school, I had a lot of emotional turmoil and was very sensitive to people around me. Too many responsibilities also. I tried to hide and repress my emotions. I also started to hate physical activity, because I thought that I suck at it (because of school sports). My neck got really bad, I suffered neck pains and headaches almost daily. It got little bit better when I did some mild exercises but I'm always aware that I can't do anything too intense because it can cause muscle strains because my neck is so stiff :( I'm an adult and I want to find the joy of physical activity, but my neck gets sore and painful so easily.

Does someone have experience and can tell me what kind of somatic release is best for this? I've done some exercises but I'm not sure if those are helping, I feel like stretches make my neck (and then head too) hurt even more. Or is neck pain and headaches part of the healing? Because I feel like I'm doing something wrong when I get them. I'm honestly depressed and feel like I'll never be able to get better. I've done so much emotional healing in the past years, also I've released so much repressed feelings and trauma from all around my body, but my neck is definitely the hardest one and I feel stuck. I want to be able to move my head and neck without pain.

Thank you if someone understands because I don't know anyone who has the same problem. Of course all people have their neck problems sometimes but mine is very serious and makes my life harder. Causes me physical and emotional pain tbh. I'm not expecting fast results because I know how healing works, it takes time and patience but I need some help to know where to start. 🫶🏻

I've been mapping a strange pattern in my body for years — and I think it goes back to a head injury at age 4

I want to describe something I've been observing carefully, because I've never seen it explained quite this way and I'm genuinely curious if anyone else has experienced it.

When I was 4 years old, I was pushed by another kid at school and hit the right side of my head hard against the edge of a staircase. The impact was severe enough to split the skin open — a deep wound that left a permanent scar on the right side of my skull. I somehow came out of it without obvious neurological damage, at least nothing that was ever formally diagnosed. Life continued. I developed normally. By adolescence I had an intense, almost overwhelming sex drive — strong erections, high energy, strong physical presence in my body.

Then, after a specific high-intensity event in my late teens involving extreme emotional conflict during peak sexual arousal, something changed. Morning erections disappeared. My libido dropped dramatically. A physical nodule formed at the internal left base of my penis. And my general drive — not just sexual, but the impulse to act, to think, to initiate — became significantly reduced compared to what it was before.

What followed has been years of oscillation. Sometimes things improve. Then they regress. No stable recovery, no clear progression. Just a cycle that keeps returning to the same baseline.

The pattern I've been mapping:

The same structure appears across almost every domain of my life. I start a project with full energy and abandon it right before it produces results. I build a habit and drop it right before the change becomes visible. I begin something, reach a certain threshold of momentum, and then something cuts it — not gradually, but abruptly, like a switch. The cut always happens near the point of completion, never at the beginning.

Sexually, it manifests as an oscillation: arousal begins to build, reaches a certain point, then drops. Not because of lack of desire — the desire is present. Something intervenes right before the cycle closes. Any help?

I can sort of get behind the idea of the whole nervous system thing and I have been pointed towards books to read but if everywhere says trauma lives in the body, why does the anxiety also feel all in my head? I’m Just constantly catastrophizing, worrying, telling myself I’m worthless /crap / not going to get the job I’m looking for / ugly etc etc. thinking about difficult experiences I had during adolescence….It’s exhausting…. i’m not sure how working on my nervous system can help my head.

Is there anyone else here who can help explain it to me?

I used to do a lot of EFT tapping when I was struggling with grief and mental health issues. It used to help me a lot to center myself. Now I'm doing much better and today I went back to a morning tapping routine just for some extra motivation and I'm immediately anxious as it has brought back memories of the time I was struggling so much. I'm sad that maybe I can never go back to tapping. Is there a way to get over this feelig of going back in time whenever I start tapping

I'll try to keep this short! I've had a variety of health issues for about ten years. Many of these started around the same time I developed a panic disorder which later became generalised anxiety. I'm in a good place mentally now but I still have various health issues. In particular, I experience quite intense muscle tightness all over my body. All my muscles feel like they are permanently clenched. I also feel my breathing is restricted. The muscle clenching seems to be the cause of pain in many places in my body, especially my jaw, neck, shoulders, head/face. I also suffer from constipation which I believe is linked to my muscles being all clenched, including pelvic floor.

I have two questions I would really like some help with.

1. Do these symptoms seem likely to be related to PTSD? My hypothesis is that because I have had along term generalised anxiety my body/nervous system became trapped in 'fight or flight' mode and my muscles have just become 'stuck' in clenching
2. What are some of the best things to try for PTSD, especially in terms of how it shows up in the body? I have done 4 years talk therapy in the past, I am on an SNRI, and I got into meditation and eventually became a Buddhist. My lifestyle is very calm (accept for constantly ruminating on the cause of my muscle/pain issues). I don't drink.

I'd really appreciate any help!

I wonder if as the body processes something big the body might readjust and get temporary issues, one being vertigo?
Would love to hear other stories or if in just lying to myself

I’ve had this dream dozens of times, it’s so real and I can feel the pain in my sleep. I’ll pull out a bunch of nails and more come right back. I guess this is my nervous system saying it’s overwhelmed, but idk what it needs.

i feel like I’m in a prison. I’m traveling this weekend and my mind keeps telling how unreal and unsafe I am. how I shouldn’t go, I should stay home etc, I go through this all the time with the things I want to do. my survival brain is keeping me trapped.

You wake up. Go to work. Live your best life.

But something is off.

Your back hurts. Often.

Your head hurts. Often.

You're tired. Even after sleep.

Your weight changes — and you don't know why. Up or down. Without reason.

You think it's the chair. The screen. The weather.

It's not.

Let's talk about weight first.

Chronic stress triggers cortisol. Cortisol tells your body it's in danger. And a body in danger stores fat — especially around the belly. Not because you eat too much. Because your nervous system is stuck in survival mode.

At the same time, cortisol disrupts insulin. Your blood sugar spikes. You crave carbs. You eat. You gain weight. You blame yourself.

But it's not discipline. It's biology responding to unprocessed emotion.

Now let's talk about prostate.

The prostate needs blood flow and regular function to stay healthy. Chronic stress and suppressed libido reduce both. The pelvic region tightens. Blood circulation drops. The organ sits idle.

No infection. No bacteria. Just a body that stopped working properly because the nervous system never got the signal that it's safe to relax.

Prostatitis without infection is psychosomatics. Doctors often don't say this out loud.

These aren't rare edge cases. They're what happens when emotions have nowhere to go.

A racing heart for no visible reason — that's not cardiology. That's anxiety living in the body.

A churning stomach before a difficult conversation — that's not gastritis. That's unprocessed stress.

Muscles tense even during sleep — that's a body that hasn't been given permission to relax in years.

You're not sick because of bad luck.

You're sick because you never stopped — and no one ever truly asked you — to honestly answer: what am I actually feeling?

Neuroscientists today say it openly: all disease begins with the nervous system. The body doesn't lie. It just speaks a language we were never taught to understand.

Want to discuss?

I haven’t been able to travel far from home for years now. if I even look at travel, my mind sends me all kinds of intrusive imagery about panicking far away from home, being unable to escape, not feeling real or safe. mind you, before this I flew all over the world solo with no issues at all. it’s been disabling beyond words. even moving to a new apartment is a whole thing.

i haven’t had a panic attack in 3 years. I’m living my life. running a business. seeing friends. trying to heal from this. yet my mind keeps in this same thought/fear loop 24/7. it’s like someone showing you a horror movie every day in your mind even when you don’t want to watch it. theres something deeply ingrained in my brain that I’m not safe. who knew 2 panic attacks would do this to you, and it’s been over 4 years since they happened. I’m deeply dissociated and numb, like a robot. yet I still have all these irrational fears. I can’t even put into words the shame I experience around my friends for this state I’m in. I can’t do anything and am at the whim of my nervous system. basically if I go against what it says and do something anyway, it’ll torment me until I cancel the trip, or go home. it’s no way to live. I feel like I’m being controlled by some robot, that makes all my decisions for me. and it is constantly telling me that I’m not safe, I’m stuck, I’m unreal and can’t handle my own reality. what a life, 34 years old and this is what I deal with 24/7. I feel like an insane loser