r/SplendidaBrown

​

So I'm thinking only thinking to go on modelling but what i have observed that thiss industry have insane beauty standards so I'm lil confused because i hate beauty standards any standards I think we should celebrate every body type and blahh blah

Anyone in this industry i need your real answer based on your experience

Guys I’m incredibly frustrated and shocked at how common it is for ABDC couples to have in laws issues, to the extent where marriages end in divorce. Couples who don’t even live with in laws have these problems. Why is this even happening? Why aren’t we evolving from our toxic cultural baggage? These people have been in USA for 30+ years!?

I know of couples who dated for 10 years, and then right after marriage the husband switches up on his wife and neglects her and prioritizes his parents. Or worse, puts false accusations of the wife being “disrespectful” for not cooking, cleaning, or bonding with husband’s family. I’ve never seen the woman’s side of the family create these issues.

Why is this happening? I’ve seen men abandon their wife and child for their parents. According to them, only their parents and siblings are their family. What about your wife or child, are they not your family? When will we evolve??? This is USA not Pakistan/India/Bangladesh/etc. When will the misogynistic buIIshlt end?!

rant over 😤🎤

I’ve known my friend for the past few years. We talk very regularly but we don’t agree on a lot of things. But I think a friendship can definitely survive if there are differences in some areas. But there are parts of her personality that I don’t really like.

Here are some examples of things we don’t agree on:

1. During convos about marriage, we were talking about deal breakers I brought up several times about how certain pasts are deal breakers for me. She would always get defensive about peoples pasts and then eventually one day, she kind of told me that she also has a past but she’s repented from it and that’s why she doesn’t think it’s fair to judge on peoples pasts. I don’t judge her for it because she’s not a marriage potential. I told her that we don’t have to agree on this and then I just didn’t bring up this topic ever again.
2. She had an employee that reports to her who wasn’t the smartest and she kept degrading him by calling him dumb and stupid. She was gossiping about him a lot and it made me uncomfortable. I’m not the smartest person either, definitely not as smart as her, and now I feel incredibly stupid and self conscious around her especially after seeing how harshly she judged someone else for not being smart enough.
3. What if she judges me the same way even tho she never said anything to me I just don’t like the way she treated him and talked about him. I don’t reall

y

1. gossip about people unless they have done something personally wrong to me. I just felt like gossiping about someone’s lack of knowledge or intelligence isn’t really right.
2. She’s been going thru a lot lately with her siblings health and has been very overwhelmed with responsibilities. I kindly suggested to her that maybe she can find a job that’s not as demanding and even sent her links about how she can get this less stressful job. She talked to me in a very condescending manner and said I would never tell you to focus more on your career (she knows I took a career break). She kept emphasizing that her career is so important to her and that I wouldn’t understand because for me a job is just a job. Which is true but she could have chosen less offensive terminology.

Keep in mind I was trying to comfort her while I’ve been goign thru a lot myself too. I definitely didn’t expect such a condescending response from her.

5. It also sounded like she was mocking me for wanting to get married from a young age. Yes I wanted to be married young so I can do things the traditional “right way”. She didn’t start looking for marriage at a young age because she had been in relationships and wasn’t interested in marriage.

Keep in mind I also come from a “successful” background but took a career break as I was burnt out. I just feel like she’s very arrogant.

I also don’t really enjoy hanging out with her and I think our hangouts are really boring and forced. She calls me her bff and says that she’s really happy to be my friend but I don’t feel the same way. Maybe we don’t have a compatible personalities. I was just friends with her because I thought she was nice but it doesn’t even seem like that anymore.