My answer is definitely a yes. Everyone runs away from these jobs, even when financial desperation kicks in. What do you think?
hi. I have been directed to this subreddit.
i am 19M. I have had identity issues since puberty (and i have repressed myself a lot during high school) and i still struggle but thanks to therapy and a gap year dedicated to self-reflection i am a bit better and i will very likely switch my undergrad to sociology. i wanted to switch to sociology partially because it seems like a major that won't restrict me on choosing an area of interest, identity and my social skills are subpar, I thought sociology could help in this manner. it also plays to my strengths unlike my previous degree which demanded a skillset that I didn’t have.
now, by picking sociology a lot of different paths and areas of interest open up and i do want to try out all of them for they all sound interesting and I want to learn as much as I can. some examples i could give (but not limited to) are cognitive sociology, urban sociology, sociology of medicine…
as for areas i would want to work in academia seems inevitable (and i wouldn't mind academia honestly) but i also want to work in more "fieldwork" areas as well.
and that's why the title is such. if i want to live a life that i could classify "fulfilling" i need to completely forego stability as in settling down and starting a family (I don’t think I could do that anyway, I am not good at giving people the attention they need.) I also don’t want a a career to dedicate my entire life towards. What I mean by that is I want to switch what I am doing every so often. i would like to add are i am already a workaholic person and i am not in the degree to make money.
In light of all of this, how could I use my 20’s?
thank you for reading my post.
The question of «what is the purpose of life, and how do you know when you have fulfilled it» has been crossing my mind from time to time over the timespan of the past 5 months and up until today have I not have had an answer to that question.
Although today I feel that I have managed to create what would be a draft for my answer. I have decided on writing this down rather than saying it in a voice message in order to avoid unrelated rambling.
The short answer to the question «what is the purpose of life, and how do you know when you have fulfilled it» in my train of thought would be that it depends on an individual’s perspective entirely.
If I were to see my life’s purpose to consist purely of physical achievements and accomplishments which are visible to the naked eye, then I would say that I have not accomplished anything in my life so far.
On the other hand, if I were to tell you that my perspective on life’s purpose consists purely on how I have benefited those around me (in more ways than one). To have helped and supported the 20, 10, 5, or even 2 people closest to me, cherished them and made their bad days good, then I would argue that my life’s purpose has already been fulfilled and that whatever comes next is simply a bonus.
So you see, the question «what is the purpose of life, and how do you know when you have fulfilled it» does not seek out one objective solution, because a solution to this question does not exist. The answer is purely a reflection of one’s own current state of mind and perspective on the concept of human life.
I am 16 years old sitting on the stairs in the dark writing this on my phone while my parents watch tv in the living room.
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So my question is about washing clothes with hot water, is it good or actually anyhelpful?, my only knoledege about it is tv shows, and you always see clothes after it getting smaller, so I don't know, is there any real reason to use hot water instead of cold water for washing?.
The way I see it, root problems are able to solve many current problems, many future problems, & actually solve those offshoot problems, rather than stalling.
When you solve offshoot problems you effectively stall cause the offshoots you solve are going to be replaced.
Hence I believe solving root problems is much more effective in the long term & leads to more problems being solved per unit time, & you even have the chance to stop certain types of offshoots from ever appearing again at least theoretically, although it of course takes a lot of effort to prevent the root problem itself from reappearing. At the very least, solving root problems with all humanity's effort means that humanity can solve problems at a faster rate than they appear.
The opposite is true currently. Currently humanity's problems grow faster than we solve them, which is why things feel as if they're getting more & more out of control/overwhelming.
Of course sometimes urgent important offshoot problems are worth focusing on for the very urgent moment like stopping nuclear war. But very few problems have that same level of combined urgency & importance.
Most of our biggest problems I believe would best be solved by attacking root problems.
The question is why aren't more people passionate about solving root problems. & how can we get them more interested.
Also an important aspect of solving root problems is that you don't want to go too deep into the fundamentals that they're unachievable but also not too shallow that solving them is not effective enough.
Some root problems that I came up with are:
high rate of change
maximalism / lack of simplification / lack of strong prioritization,
lack of individual level & societal level exploration/generalization/diversification,
high Inertia / slow relative adaptability,
lack of strong checks & balances
& I think lack of wisdom is an emerging phenomena that is built off of multiple fundamental root problems, but is more encompassing of humanity's problems because conscious & unconscious thinking are the main methods through which humanity decides actions for change. & because humanity is the main actor in it's environment besides the sun & nature & Earth's geological processes/orbit, all of which we know are not problematic like humans are. Hence we can conclude that humanity creates the majority of its own problems & that the lack of good decision making AKA lack of wisdom leads to most of humanity's offshoot problems.
The question is can you greatly increase humanity's wisdom.
With my personal definition of wisdom being two fold the first being that wisdom is simply a combination of good thinking & good values.
The second being that thinking & values aka wisdom exists for the purpose of understanding the current state aka point A & understanding the various achievable states point Bs & then using the understanding of how the universe works & the understanding of different options & values to decide on the best point B & then navigate the universe from point A to point B.
I believe we use this process of thinking & valuing all the time. As we navigate change, we mentally calculate our present & our desired future & then we act. I believe that this navigating process becomes fallible when our thinking &/or values are not logical. I believe values can be somewhat logical although they probably can't be completely logical. & thinking can be completely logical.
Our values I believe are represented by good & bad, attraction & repulsion. We either move toward something or away, labeling it as good or bad. & indifference is the balancing of these two forces. Our values are built from our experiences. If we experience something in a bad way we label it as bad, or as good if we experience it in a good way.
I'd say it's much harder to understand how thinking works but the good thing is that the process of thinking leads to easier agreement, whereas values are much harder to come to an agreement on even though there's probably some logic to values. Values also often lead to bias in thinking.
Basically humanity needs to master the art of thinking & values if it wants to achieve wise desirable future states cause you can't navigate if you don't know how to think & you can't navigate if you don't know what to value/prioritize.
I think humanity underestimates this thinking & valuing combination in regards to being able to achieve future wise desirable states.
Hence wisdom is lacking, hence many offshoot problems arise.
I'd love to know what you guys think about these ideas I brought up. I'm trying to get people more interested in solving these root problems. Also if you're interested in increasing humanity's wisdom just let me know. I have a discord community called Help Humanity Be Wise + More.
How do you get rid of evil located in the mental state. The basic things like mindfulness or observing without engaging really don't work how I want them to and trust me this evil is a tone. It's quite scary having this in the mind I need the most support.
Hey Guys. I am extremely scared of HIV right now.
I had Sex with 2 Sex-workers on saturday. (4 days ago)
One was a women, we had Protected Sex and the condom was used without issues as far as i know. We also did 69 and i licked her Vagina oral.
Then after that, i went to a trans-women. She gave me a blowjob without protection, i gave her a short blowjob with protection. We didnt have analsex. After giving a blowjob to each other, we jerked off our dicks with one hand (our dicks touched unprotected while jerking both off with a hand). There was no cum, blood or anything else from her side as far as i know. I didnt notice precum from her side, but im not sure.
I was so scared, i went to the hospital to get PEP. ive been taking it for four days now and got it 16 hours after the contact with the trans women.
I know this may sound idiotic, i read a lot, im young snd confused and especially scared.
Does anyone have an Idea of how scared i have to be or what else i can do? Whats the risk i am infected with HIV?
A family member who I am in the wedding party for is having a destination wedding on a long weekend so the accommodation is ridiculous is expecting everyone to come. No one is speaking up but I think its absolutely ridiculous. The whole wedding is going to cost me easy 5k plus time off work. There is really nothing i can do but I just wanted the perspectives from people who have destination weddings and expect everyone to foot the bill WHY.
and why?
I’m 21. I slacked in highschool and is why I’m in community college trying to make up. I want to transfer to a 4 yr and get a job that pays well someday. I want to be able to buy a house, have a wife and kids someday. I feel like this is a very normal want and life pat. I don’t like to watch social media news a lot because I feel a lot of is driven off engagement and fear to get more clicks. I feel no one wants marriage or kids anymore. I feel now I have to justify to the world why I want marriage and kids. I want marriage and kids because it’s just something I emotionally want not because it’s some calculated scheme. I feel the world now hates this, is pessimistic and hates me for wanting this. Does the world now really think life is over, ai is going to ruin everything, and getting married and having kids is now inherently wrong want and theyve given up
Hi friends so I want to understand one thing here. So I know society has gotten a lot stricter on young adults and teen relationships eg 16 and 19 year olds together or 15 19 or 17 and 20 year olds dating and the parents of those younger teens even if it’s a 2 year age gap feel a need to end the relationship and or report it to police rather than just seeing both as kids and being involved with guidance in the background. I’m wondering why is it nowadays like let’s say a 12 15 year old or 13 15 seems to get seen as ok and a 16 19 year old is not? I’m trying to just figure out why one is not viewed as a big deal and the other is a major criminal case potentially? For instance, the influencer Jiji wonder when she was 15 she was close with a 13 year old and Jiji did not get in trouble?
I’m a 35yo single-parent looking to go back to school. I’ve worked in the service industry for the last 16yrs, and I want to put my mind/money towards an industry that I can still drop off/pick up my child from school in. Remote ideal, but honestly just want something that I can get in at entry level. I’m freaked out by everything I’m reading about AI taking over, entry level jobs disappearing, unlivable wages, etc. I just want a livable wage, reasonable hours, and fricken health insurance. Please help!
My friend has around $12M in cash and assets that he's going to leave behind to his three adult sons. His kids are doing fine in life. Not rich but not wanting either.
The other day, he told each of his kids privately that he will leave the other two more inheritance because "they need it more and I believe in you most" as a sort of fun test. His eldest took it well, said it's not his money and it's up to him how to divide it. His youngest took it in stride too, saying yeah they do while laughing. His middle child though, much to his surprise, started to curse him out and saying it's unfair how they got what's rightfully his. Hurtful things are said and apparently he threatened to hurt his siblings if this is ever done. He calmed down after told this is just a prank and they would of course all get the same amount.
Apparently this experience left my friend quite traumatized. He now plan to cut off as much of his middle child as possible as he no longer consider him his son.
I told him perhaps it's just a moment of lapse as usually his middle son is normal. But my friend said he consider it "showing his true color and not deserving of anything." Apparently he has it all on video and plan to send it to his lawyer to play after his death so everyone knows the reason.
As much as I'm in agreement that ungrateful people shouldn't receive anything, this feels wrong. What do you think?
What's up yall, so I got banned on ig (hardware ban) and i do have a pc and old tablet but ig on pc sucks especially for watching reels and the tablet is way too slow, my question is should I sell my phone and get a new one (even if its worse) or what exactly?
Everyone always complains about being isolated in smaller cities, but no one points out what's genuinely missing (like third places, better transit, or community hubs). People just accept the boredom instead of demanding actual solutions, and it needs to change.
I really notice how people underestimate themselves and don’t really understand the responsibility they possess, often maintaining an opinion of “all or nothing”(for instance either everyone changes the city, or no one does — and I move away). What are your thoughts on this?
i’m a woman in my 20s. i have a masters degree and am abt to move to switzerland. my life is good and there is no need to change anything immediately, but i’m reflecting rn on which life i want for my future and i don’t seem to be able to decide. i have two different life ideas which cannot be mixed!! would love if you could share YOUR perspectives on those two different lifestyles. it is not about me- it is about the pros and cons.
in both i am equally wealthy.
life 1: in my 40s
i have a secure job and an even more secure relationship. everything is set, very balanced and “normal” life.
everything is secure, almost boring at times.
highlights are hiking w my partner/friends or going an relaxing trips. or a job promotion.
i collect special experiences 3x a year
life 2: also in my 40s
i have a good job but gotta put more effort in projects and prioritise things, more self reliance.
i life in a non-monogamous relationship, my partner and i are often on trips for work and spend only half of the time together. i party a lot, do the one or other drug and hook ups.
many good friends. i have everything but still want more. very dopamine driven.
i collect special experiences weekly.
She’ll willing walk anywhere else in the house but not the basement. She’ll cry at the top of the steps. She’ll go down any other steps. She refuses to go down the basement steps. She doesn’t mind being in the basement if I carry her and bring her down, she just won’t walk down the steps willingly. The steps are the same as they are in any other part of the house so idk what her issue is.
I want her to be my little buddy.
Edit: the steps are identical to the steps in the rest of my house in both condition and in appearance
Hello everyone, I (19F) have a major history of all kinds of cancers on my mom's side. It has never truly frightened me that I might have inherited genes related to all these cancers; lung, colorectal, ovarian, breast cancer etc.
Last year I started having troubles with my bowel movements so horribly that my intestines were swollen so much after 2 weeks of pain and thinking it'd pass on its own, that the ultrasound tech couldn't see my appendix (I haven't had mine removed). This was a crappy experience but I believed it was a once off, this however turned out to not be true, since the first time this happened in January of last year, it has recurred at least 5 or 6 times total (every few months). I thought my stomach was being whack, but for months now I have had unexplained abdominal pain, bone pains, fatigue and overall tiredness and a plethora of other unexplained symptoms. I have gone for bloodwork, for ultrasounds, etc. and everything comes back clean.
So to understand my cancer concern, we discovered my sister has a gene that my mom's uncle had (ultimately lead to his death sadly), which she inherited from my mom, which increases the odds of developing colorectal cancer/cancerous polyps in the colon and rest of the intestine. Our family doctor thinks there's a high likelihood I have inherited this same gene.
So it's been over a month of me not having regular stools, it's been constant constipation or diarrhea; sorry for tmi but each time I wipe even if it's constipation, the residue on the TP is always gooey which is abnormal for me, I started having migraines a couple months ago which isn't something I used to experience frequently at all, but it has become almost a daily guarantee, I feel constantly tired and unmotivated to do things, I randomly get nauseous and have to lie down, I am in constant on and off lower abdominal pain and it has become hard to function as I'm doing my final year of high school (I took 2 gap years)
I saw the doctor last week Monday and I told her I haven't had a regular stool in over a month and the look on her face kind of concerned me a bit. I would like to preface by saying that this has been my doctor since I was a premie, so that is the reason she doesn't always fully keep her expressions neutral. She has been our family doctor for over 20 years, so it's a bit different to her seeing a stranger. My mother made her aware of our discovery about the gene and I'll be honest, before my mother mentioned it, this woman seemed concerned. I know her well by now and I can tell when something is a small issue and when she thinks something is truly wrong and it looked like the latter. She told me she isn't going to prescribe anything because she doesn't know what is wrong with my stomach, though my intestines were swollen again. She then heard about the gene and was even more in support of her intial idea which is me having to get a colonoscopy. She also mentioned randomly how cancer patients are in the most denial out of all the patients she deals with (I understand this is just general talk since a cancer related gene was mentioned).
Even months prior I had been researching colorectal cancer when I had a plethora of correlating symptoms, it's like I know something is wrong with my body, but there's never truly any answer through the general medical tests I've been for. I want to be clear that I am not sitting here convinced I have cancer, but the concern is real for me for some reason. I have all of the symptoms but do understand that those symptoms could also be due to a million other conditions or health hiccups, the knowledge that a ton of different cancers are inherited in my family is what is making me more concerned at the possibility of my symptoms not being due to something else. Google isn't a medical professional, I just researched because I was getting nowhere in terms of answers at the time.
I have also been eating tons more than usual in the last few weeks and I was scared to see the number on the scale, but to my surprise, I hadn't gained even a 100g which just genuinely doesn't seem right to me. I also lost 1kg overnight.
My consultation is this week, but my colonoscopy might have to wait, because my exams are coming up. I was initially gonna go on the 29th of June, but discomfort, hella nausea (basically throwing up in my mouth at times) and pain have pushed me to call and ask for a much sooner date.
I am not convinced I have cancer, but I have broken down crying at random times throughout the week, having this unnerving feeling that I have cancer, but this could just be anxiety or the stress of not knowing what the issue at hand is. I have just been emotional and feeling worried that the issue isn't as small as everyone is hoping or preparing for it to be.
How do I know if I am overreacting in this situation or just thinking intrusively or being paranoid? Does anyone have advice?