r/divorced

Ladies of reddit. Where does someone find a wholesome, decent, feminine woman in this world today? So I'm a 46M and I was married for 18 years before my wife left me. She also left my now 11F daughter with me and I've been raising her basically alone. What can I do to meet someone who is decent? I want a relationship, I don't need one. I was always faithful, honest, and open with my ex but that wasn't enough.

To be real, I struggle daily with feeling like I'm not good enough to be in a relationship because of how much I'm still broken. Any constructive advise from anyone? I'm really about to lose hope here.

Ready to begin a new journey. I don't even know where to begin.

I am going through divor$e in Florida and wanted to know if there is any suggestions for good lawyer$ , how to pick a lawyer and any tips to watch for . Thank you

Heyo!

So, yeah, pretty much how the title says.

I am fairly recently divorced (my decision), 36m, and I have days, that I really want a relationship, someone to talk about my days with, hold, snuggle, go out to dinner with and feel comfortable with, (yes intimacy too), etc..

And then maybe later in that same day, that feeling passes and then it is like "nah, I am good, maybe I really shouldn't want/don't want a relationship and should just enjoy "my time" and be the best coparent I can be.

Just curious if anyone else deals with these feelings? And if you do, is there anything you do about them? Did you get into a relationship and then think "oh no"?

Thanks in advance and look forward to hearing all about it! Take care! :)

Married for 3 months. We ran into immediate problems. She has been drunk since the wedding and I filed for divorce a month ago. We have been sleeping in separate rooms, now she is pushing to sharing a bed again, without intimacy. She is also pushing making the relationship work, I have explained it cannot.

Is it a major step backwards to share a bed?

I’m a 40-year-old married man who has reached that stage in life where everything looks fine on the outside, yet something feels missing on the inside. Between work, responsibilities, and family, I’ve slowly realized I’ve forgotten how to talk about what I’m actually feeling.
I’m not looking to disrupt anyone’s life or judge anyone else’s choices. I’m simply hoping to connect with a married woman who understands the quiet loneliness that can come with midlife—the questions, the self-doubt, the changing relationships, and the search for meaning beyond everyday routines.
If you’ve ever felt like you’re carrying thoughts you can’t easily share with the people closest to you, maybe we’ll understand each other. I’d value honest conversations, mutual respect, empathy, and a place where we can listen without pretending to have all the answers.
Sometimes a kind conversation with someone who truly understands can make all the difference.

Here in a few weeks is the fifth anniversary of getting my divorce from my wife. Just for a quick summary. I’m 2020 I found out my then wife had been cheating on me. She told me she had been sleeping with a male coworker friend from an old job, she then also told me she had also been sleeping with my own sisters husband (aka asshole-in-law). My sister also knew that they were fooling around and was ok with it and didn’t say anything about it to me. Everyone got what they wanted out of it, my ex found someone else and was dating them by the time the divorce was final. Her friend got who knows how many times to do with her what he wanted, and My asshole-in-law got to get his jollies off and got to stay married to my sister and have another kid with her who was conceived during the affair. Everyone got to be happy…except me.

Now here it is 5 years later and I’m still single, but not for a lack of trying. I’m not sure I know how to meet people. I’ve tried so many dating apps well more than one time each. I’m 5 years I’ve had only a few dates and nothing that went past the first date. I have no idea what I’m doing wrong, how to date, how to meet someone or even what I like anymore or how to learn that. Anyone have some actual advice that could help me?

Hi everyone. I am new here and am looking for conversations with anyone and am open to chatting and helping with any stress . I am a good listener so you can vent out and I am quite comforting. So upvote me and let's start chatting.

Who do you talk to now that your partner is gone. I was with him for over 20 years I shared everything with him of course and now that he is gone who do I tell everything to?
I don’t have close girlfriends so that’s not an option. I talk to my parents but that’s not the same. I have an adult son but I saw my mother in law and husband have a relationship where he was her confidant and it didn’t seem healthy.
So do y’all do?

Nobody spends thousands on a wedding expecting to become divorced. I didn’t.

Remember, the wedding is one day. Marriage is thousands of ordinary days like:

Communication.
Forgiveness.
Patience.
Repair.

What’s one thing you wish someone had taught you before you got married?

I’m a 45 year old woman who is separated and planning on getting divorced. I have a child. I think that I am competent, smart, and beautiful. I’m politically very progressive and have a master’s degree. I don’t really feel like getting on dating websites. I would love to meet a divorced dad who successfully co-parents with similar values as me. But where do I look?

27M, single, and looking for a friendship or relationship with a divorced woman. Age is not an issue for me—I’m open to connecting with women of any age as long as we get along and share similar values.

If you're interested in getting to know each other and are looking for friendship or relationship , feel free to send me a message.

I left my wife for another woman about 2 weeks ago. Life’s been great! I really do enjoy being able to enjoy my girlfriend without bounds. We’ve even discussed marriage and I’m not opposed to it but without my divorce being finalized, that could be an issue. Hell. I still get bored and stay the night with my wife sometimes and don’t feel bad for it cause I don’t know wtf all my girlfriend could be on. Trust issues. Idk.

The other day I had dinner with my girlfriend and her family while they were in town. All I could think about is how none of them knows about my situation. And omg. Idk wtf I’d do if they found out either. Because I really do like my girlfriend.

There is a real bitterness now. Before it was look how happy and wealthy I am.

Now its he has been awful to me for years. Not sure if they hid the abuse then and lied to me, (whic happens) or are they interpreting it differently now and finally seeing it for what it is or perhaps twisting the narrative?

Money really brings out the ugly in people. The entitlement, greed and envy its unleashed it insane.

I feel like I dont know these people anymore.

A lot of hate is directed at me because I have my own home, no partner, so I have ( at least currently) no risk of losing half.

I dont understand what's going on and am confused by the anger and hatred directed at me when all of the ladies involved will still be way richer than I will ever be.

Has a taste of money changed them or were they gold diggers and I didn't notice?

They also never told me how much of a slave they have to be to their partners, telling me its equal and their partners helps. Now its switched to resentment that they run about being his mummy and now will be left with a lower standard of living because they no longer want to do this.

I get i have a different life experience and outlook which Is why I am asking for other peoples perspective

I'm a 52-year-old husband and father of two children.

For most of my marriage, I trusted my wife completely. She could go out with friends, travel, stay out late, and I never thought twice about it. I wasn't jealous. I wasn't controlling. I genuinely believed that if you love someone, you trust them.

Over the last couple of years, I discovered multiple affairs. One started with exchanging explicit photos and ended in a sexual encounter at a club. Another involved a man from another city that she actively pursued and met up with.

The worst one was a man in California. There were multiple trips, multiple lies, and a lot of things I found out long after the fact. Some of those trips involved explanations that turned out not to be the full truth.

Since then, my wife has been very clear about something: She doesn't really believe in traditional monogamy anymore.

She talks about sexual adventures, swinger's clubs, open relationships, and experiences with other people. She says she doesn't want another long-term relationship if we split. She wants freedom.

The strange thing is that I don't think the sex is the part that hurts me most. What hurts is the betrayal. The lying. The feeling that while I was trying to save our business, save our finances, and hold our family together, she was living a different life.

For a long time, I thought I wanted to save the marriage. Now I'm not so sure. The woman I married wanted the same future I wanted. The woman sitting across from me today seems to want something completely different.

And maybe that's okay. The realization I've had recently is this: I cannot stop her from being who she is.

If I tell her she can't go somewhere, she'll resent me. If I tell her she can't see certain people, she'll resent me. If I tell her she can't live the life she wants, she'll resent me.

And honestly, I don't want to spend the next 10 years policing another adult.

I'm starting to think the marriage itself is the problem. Not because I hate her. I don't. I love her and I probably always will.

She's still the mother of my children. She's still the most beautiful woman I've ever known. But maybe love isn't enough when two people want completely different lives.

She wants an open relationship and I don't want a long term relationship it's not with her. I'm really not the jealous type but betrayal took a toll on me. The girl I married is gone and I really don't think she's ever coming back.

My current thinking is that divorce may actually bring peace. Not because I want her gone. Not because I want revenge. But because it ends the betrayal.

If we're divorced and she stays out until 3 a.m., that's her choice. If we're divorced and she travels with friends, that's her choice. If we're divorced and she sleeps with other people, that's her choice. There is no betrayal because there is no marriage contract being broken. If she finds someone else, so be it. I'm fine with either or at this point.

Ironically, I feel like I could have a better relationship with her divorced than married. We have children together. We will always be connected. We genuinely enjoy each other's company. We still have an amazing sex life. But I no longer believe we want the same marriage.

Am I crazy for thinking that divorce might actually improve our relationship? Has anyone gone through something similar where the friendship survived but the marriage didn't?

Ask anything, need some new single friends. All of mine are married with kids, I have one teen, so I’m close to having my freedom lol