Wife moved out while I was away - unsure how to process this
I’ve been married for around 2 years. The last couple of years have been extremely difficult personally — my father passed away, my mother had a knee replacement, and I was consumed with family responsibilities, work pressure, and grief. I know this affected my marriage emotionally.
Recently, my wife and I have been going through a very rough phase. She said things haven’t been okay between us emotionally and otherwise, and that we owe each other a proper conversation before going further. She was planning to move to a separate rented place, and I was trying to give her space and remain respectful.
I had to travel for visa-related work. When I came back from the airport at around 10:30 pm, I found that she had moved out most/all of her things — clothes, documents, cosmetics, suitcases, microwave, fridge, shoe cupboard, tables, racks, etc. The house was left messy and dirty from packing/rummaging, with dust and items lying around. I was exhausted from travel and ended up doing basic cleaning/jhadoo-pocha because I couldn’t sit in that mess.
I called her immediately after seeing the house, but she didn’t pick up.
I feel blindsided and deeply hurt. I understand needing space, but the way this was done — while I was away, without a proper conversation, and leaving the house like that — feels very painful and disrespectful.
I’m not sure whether this is effectively the end or whether I should still try to have a calm conversation. I’m also wondering if I should consult a counsellor or lawyer at this point, just to understand my options.
How should I handle this without reacting emotionally or making things worse?