r/ewphoria

My spouse and I (MtF) recently made friends with another couple (cishet), which was a huge deal for us because we haven’t made new friends in years.

We bonded over the same interests. I ended up clicking really well with the husband because of shared references and my spouse clicked more with his wife. I was so happy to finally have friends we genuinely vibed with.

Recently, though, I noticed the vibe shift. He isn't as expressive anymore, keeps a little more distance, using more bro-like language with me like "I dunno, man" and "Dude!" (not in a disrespectful or misgendering way though). From some glances and comments his wife has made, it seems to me that she feels threatened somehow by our relationship, and he is trying not to trigger her.

It is such a weird feeling. I never thought about or wanted to be perceived as a threat to another woman's relationship. It really sucks because I just wanted to make friends.

So for context, I transitioned a few years ago. I’ve been living at home to help out my mum whilst I work and go to university. My NEET of a brother still lives at home and was initially not very supportive of me transitioning but has come around since I went full time like 4 years ago.

I do sometimes still get into arguments with him or complain to him about his slobbish behaviour. Generally he’d get upset and use fairly generic insults but of late it’s progressively become almost exclusively highly gendered insults and name calling of like a misogynistic quality. For example, brushing off things I say with saying I’m just being hormonal, using ‘princess’ in a derogatory tone, calling me a cunt or being cunty, or calling me a bitch or complaining I’m bitching at him about whatever the issue is.

I should add this isn’t a regular occurrence and we mostly get on, there’s never any violence or anything, just he’s incredibly childish and acts like an angsty teenager despite being over 30. Basically he treats me as poorly as he does my cis sister when she comes to visit. Like it’s annoying but in a way affirming that he has as little respect for me as he does other women.

Also a little more context vis a vis living arrangement. He mostly doesn’t interact with either me or my mum 90% of the time and stays in his room just doing whatever it is he does on the internet. Also claims he can’t work due to an injury he had a few years ago that caused him to quit working and precipitated his moving back in at the insistence of our grandmother much to everyone else’s objections. He does however still go places and do stuff, he’s basically just lazy.

Ive been thinking about this all day, and so I thought Id share. For context Im 46 yrs old, and have been transitioning and on hormones for nearly four years now. My hair is growing and naturally curly, I dont really grow body hair much anymore, and Ive had top surgery. I look in the mirror and still see my old self.

Im now living in Medford, OR, after a recent move. Today I drove up to Olympia, WA to see some friends Ive not seen in months and raid my storage unit. I knew it would be a long day driving up there and back so I was slumming it. No bra, no make up, just some pink shorts and a hello kitty tshirt. Anyways on the way back, I didnt think I looked very feminine so I opted for the mens room at a truck stop in Salem, OR. I tend to use the restroom of whatever gender I feel like I look like on a specific day, despite attempting to present as female everyday for the four years. Ok back to the story, I walk in the men's room and right up to a urinal. Two guys in there look at me weird but say nothing. I quickly go to the restroom and wash my hands. As Im walking out the doorway there is a third guy standing there. He is fiddling with his phone and starts harassing me about using the mens room. I dont remember exactly what he said, but he pursued me out of the truck stop entrance shouting "ma'am Ill calling the cops" several times, or there in sorts.

I was completely dumbfounded that I was first not even androgynous enough to pull off the mens room, but even more so that the guy felt the need to protect the men from the ladies. Regardless, it was euphoric for me. I guess I dont see myself the way others see me. Secondly, it was a learning lesson. Ill have to be more cognizant of energy im putting out.

So, yesterday I was invited to a an event to paint cups of glass. The event was clearly women-coded. I decided to go.

Context: I’m a passing trans woman who goes stealth in the condominium I live in.

Okay, 90% of the event was super nice, I had several talks with the other girls. But near the end they started talking about a man who lives next to us who is a crossdresser. He wear women clothing and make up when he feels like it. But apparently the girls found it “too strange for their tastes”

Before replying anything I like to see the overall opinion to see if exposing my opinion will endanger me, and I’m glad I waited. Some phrases were said

“He is married to a woman and has a daughter, how can her wife stand it?” (She is his wife, not you)

“I couldn’t stay with my husband if he started doing this” (Nobody is obligating you to anything)

“People should assume who they are! If the person likes guys then go and be with guys” (this has so many layers of being wrong that I don’t even know where to start)

“I couldn’t keep track of the letters since LGBT” (i listen to it as “it’s not my problem, I’ll pretend I don’t live in a world they exist”, not because she didn’t memorize the letters but the complete lack of interest on information)

I replied with a lot of caution “well, he is a crossdresser but he feels like a man, he may like women, it’s just how he expresses himself. And just out of curiosity, right now the most used is LGBTQIAPN+”, they kept bullsh#tting after my context explanation but they started to lower down the topic until it faded away.

(I wanted to give better replies or go away, but those people live too close to me, I don’t want to put myself in unnecessary danger, I preferred to not participate)

After the event ended and I got home I was like:
“Ok, im feeling awful knowing these people suck, but over 20 women there and I passed to the point they started feeling safe bulls#itting next to me…. Yay….?”

So today a phone compagny called me think it was my mom all the call it's kinda funny but I love how he gender me . What do you think does something similar happened to you

I was replying to this post in r/askmen asking why men are receiving so much hate these days on social media, in response to a post by a woman (tiktok or whatever) saying men should start in prison and earn their way out.

https://www.reddit.com/r/AskMen/s/j2EHYVyCaH

I spend hours on r/GirlDinnerDiaries, and the number of posts just on that sub about what asshats men can be is astonishing. Add in lots of other women oriented subs and it's gets recockulous. This was my reply:

>I believe it's simply a realization that women feel safer not having anything to do with random men, either on the street or in a dating context. Say "well not all men..." all you like, but when a significant enough portion of those "other" men lead to numbers of as much as 4 out of 5, ***80% of women*** (according to a quick Google search), reporting being assaulted, sexually assaulted, or raped, at what point do you tell a woman "well, just try again, maybe it won't be as bad this time you go out" before they say *"hell, no!"*. Can you blame them for not wanting to take the chance? We live in a patriarchal society in which men are socialized, in general, that it's ok to do whatever to a woman because of one myth or another, about wanting to be dominated, or "it's their place", or "no means yes", and it's fed by incels who feel deprived and denied their "rights" or people who are idolized, like the Tates, or fundamentalist Christianity.

>I'm MtF, I'm trans, I lived life for 50 years as a man, before I came to a realization that that wasn't me. But I've lived with those ideas, the "boys should be experienced and have lots of partners, but girls should be pristine and virginal" and how it messes with a guy's head. Now that I'm living as a woman, and consider myself one, I get it from the other side too. Once I started listening to women, going to women focused reddit subs, listening without judging, and believing what I heard, I think there's a huge lack of self awareness among men over the way they treat women, what they expect from them, and frankly, women are getting tired of having to be teachers and mothers and caregivers to people who are supposedly grown ups. And yes, "not all men...", but at some point, people get burnt out and don't care, sorry.

I logged on this evening to a notice from the r/askmen mods saying I've been perma banned. No mention of what rule I broke or anything, just "yur banned, hur hur". I'm not fighting it. I don't belong there anymore.

I was in a changing room (I am closeted to everyone except my parents and pre hrt) and I accidentally got in someone’s way, and then he says to me “bro get out of my way, your tits are bigger than my moms” (keep in mind I am not fat or muscular enough to have man boobs as my friends call them) so me and my friend who was next to me (who knows I’m trans) burst out laughing, and finished getting change and move on. I felt both euphoric that my tits are big pre hrt but ew because he was looking at my tits

I was playing a game I liked before I transitioned cod zombies and when I was playing one of my teammates asked if I was a boy or girl cause I didn’t have a mic I was just typing in chat. When I said I was a girl they immediately stated making sexiest and sexual comments and jokes it was really weird and honestly sucked but I would be lying if I said it didn’t bring me gender euphoria is this normal?

I’ve been posting a bit on a popular sub with a large percentage of trans women and this morning I got a message request from a rando. Before I even opened his message I checked his post history and he only had 3 posts, all 3 about looking for a puppy girl without an owner, immediately ignored it but I thought I’d share lol

I was out and about today with my sister, shopping for makeup and hygiene products. Wonderful day. I was dressed up and feeling super.

Somehow my ex must have seen me for the first time since I've started presenting femme full-time, and immediately started texting me with insults, bigotry and trying to dig up our past to hurt me. Saying I look ridiculous, i can't be a woman because she was in love with a man and this can't be, that I should take off the "sports bra" (I was wearing a lacy bralette and halter top).

I wasn't feeling anything bad. I was laughing at how butt-hurt and knee-jerk she was behaving. I kept telling her that it's pointless to try and insult me, and that it's always been a forgone conclusion that she was a transphobe.

I eventually just got tired of the massive spam, and asked her if she was asking to be blocked.

"Okay, ma'am" she responded before I ended the conversation.

Yay? No. She was being hateful.

Still... 🤔

I have accidentally referred to a transgender at work of their original gender. I did so without even thinking in my email reply. “Hello Sir…” vs “Hello Ma’am…”

I feel like complete garbage!!! It was a complete mistake! I apologized in an email specifically to her, her and I have not always had a great working relationship, but I mean her absolutely no disrespect. She is a complete badass!

How am I to get over this horrible feeling? She did not deserve it, I should not have replied, I have been working on my emails more professionally written, but this was a complete stupid mishap on my end.

I'm a closeted trans girl with extreme genital dysphoria. I naturally wear women's underwear under my unisex clothes (i just can't tolerate boy clothes even while hiding in the closet) but recently I've started to wear very tight panties to keep my crotch flat. I hate erections. I wish I had a vagina but there's a long time before I can get vaginoplasty. Now it causes my girlstick incredible pain but allowing the erection makes me feel very suicidal. I do like masturbating, but the dysphoria hits when the sexual pleasure fades. So I've permanently shifted to nipple until I can get my vaginoplasty. Anal is too painful and messy for me. I've stopped using my girlstick because of the dysphoria it gives me. So I basically endure a lot of genital pain to experience a little euphoria. It has also lead to eczema but i don't really care about the well-being of an organ I hate so much. When I'm fully soft, it just feels like I have a vagina and it makes a bit more comfortable than being reminded of my penis. I hate my genitals so much