My dating journey so far:

Late 2024, I was dating Muslims. I use the term "dating" loosely as I've never made it to the relationship stage 😭 Back then, I accepted that I was going to marry a Muslim guy and fake being practicing. I was willing to fake pray and carry on living my double life after marriage. After meeting Muslim men, I realised they are just pervy misogynists who will definitely turn religious after marriage. The first guy I fell really hard for actually violently threatened to hurt me. I then moved onto to trying to date Muslims that were less practicing or cultural ones. I also realised that the double life is not for me and I really want a partner that I can be myself with and have a haram lifestyle with.

Earlier this year I was dating this really kind Muslim guy I got on really well with for a few months. I made it super clear that I am not religious and do not want to be left in the future for that reason or expected to become more practicing. 3 months later he decided that he did want someone practicing after all.

So then in April this year, my friend suggested looking for ex-muslims on Hinge and Reddit which I decided to do. The Idea of being with an ex- muslim just sounded amazing to me. Being with someone you can relate to but also get your freedom.

I managed to find a lot of ex-muslim guys, talk to a lot of them and I went on a date with 3 of them. My issue was I wasn't finding most of them attractive. I managed to run out of everyone to see on Hinge because I was just pressing the cross icon constantly. The attractive guys I did speak to were looking for something short term. One guy literally asked me on the first call if I have a date rule for sex. He was clearly just looking for sex.

So then the third ex-muslim guy I went out with was the first one I was ever attracted to that also was looking for something serious. Obviously my heart had hope. I wasn't delusional and thought we definitely going to end up together but he did end things very suddenly and out of the blue when I thought things were going well. No real reason or closure was given as well.

But what did I do? I start sobbing like a baby for two days and start worrying about my future. I also was crying when the guy before that rejected me... even though I wasn't really attracted to him. The whole reason why I'm telling you this is because... I don't think I would be that upset if I had more options. If I had a bigger dating pool and wasn't relying on these men to be my escape fantasy to a future of freedom.

There is pressure to get married in a young age in my family. Everyone gets married young. People are always asking me when I'm going to get married. I am realising now that's it's not healthy for me to sob over men that I barely know who reject me.

I've been thinking in order to work on this, I need to live my life more authentically. I need to give myself that freedom rather than waiting on a man. I'm going to be honest with my family about taking the hijab off soon as before my plan was to do it after marriage when I'm no longer under her roof.

I also do enjoy dating and I am thinking I need to date more authentically and not restrict myself so much. I love flirting and teasing a cute guy. I love compliments and physical affection. I love having someone to talk to everyday and laugh with. I love having someone that's thinking about me and I just switch off more when I'm dating someone. I love chivalry from a gentleman. I love how happy and bubbly I feel when I'm with someone cute. If I'm thinking less about an escape fantasy and what my heart truly wants if there was no pressure to get married- then marriage wouldn't even be on my mind. I would just want a long- term relationship.

I've never been in a relationship before but I want to know what it feels like for someone to call me "mine" and to belong to someone. There were a lot of attractive never-muslims on Hinge that I couldn't like because I knew they were not going to be in my future but now im thinking who cares?

My heart just wants to be loved by anyone I want and to date at any pace. No deadline for marriage. Just to date someone of my own choice that I like for however long it takes.

Im considering doing just that. Opening my dating pool to never-muslims even though I might not have a future with them. I don't know how risky that is though. I am a clingy loving person so I am scared of getting attached and then having to let go but maybe it's what I need?

I spoke to an ex-muslim girl a few months ago who had a white boyfriend but she was in the dilemma where she loves him but felt she might have to let him go because she loves her family too. I also don't want to lose my family. Has anyone else been in this position before?

31 M 4 F

31M Egyptian, living in China, looking for a genuine connection

Hey!

I'm an Egyptian guy living in China, looking for a real relationship—not into games, ghosting, or wasting each other's time.

I have a stable career, and a clear plan for my future. Outside of work, I enjoy traveling, going to the gym, hiking, learning languages, exploring different cultures, and having conversations that go beyond small talk.

A few things about me:

• Egyptian 🇪🇬 living in China 🇨🇳

• Ex-Muslim & open-minded

• Financially stable with a good sense of where I'm heading in life

• More of a gym, coffee, and travel person than a party person

• Undecided about kids, but currently leaning toward not having them

• Looking for a life partner and open to marriage if we’re a good match

I connect best with someone who's kind, emotionally mature, curious, and values honesty and communication. Nationality doesn't matter to me—I'm more interested in finding the right person than the right passport.

If you think we'd get along, feel free to PM me here or on Telegram "@No\_pain\_no\_gain\_yo "

East Africa / Open to LDR

Hey! I’m a 22 y/o uni student (5'3 / 160cm) currently doing volunteer work on the side. I’m an apatheist, and I’m looking for a thoughtful, liberal, and open-minded ATHEIST/AGNOSTIC partner who actually aligns with my values.

I’m completely childfree and will never want kids, so please be 100% sure you feel the same way. I’m loyal, honest, and not materialistic or superficial at all—character and kindness mean everything to me. I want to take things very slow and build a real emotional foundation, so if you are driven by lust, looking for fast gratification, or want to control someone, we will not be a match. We’ll be long-distance for a long while, so you have to be comfortable and patient with an online connection first. I also have zero tolerance for disrespect or game-playing.

If you message me, please write a real introduction with your age, location, and a bit about yourself so I know you actually read this. Low-effort messages like "hi" or "hey" will just be ignored.

I am an afghan closeted ex muslim looking for friends. I like movies, music, sports etc. Dm w age

Hello!

So apparently, finding a wife the normal way is difficult, so here I am outsourcing the task to Reddit.

I'm 30, a British Pakistani lawyer in the UK, which means I can argue professionally but would much rather debate where we're ordering takeaway from.

Looking for an open-minded woman who's after something serious and wants marriage eventually. Bonus points if you're emotionally intelligent, kind, and don't think pineapple on pizza is grounds for divorce (although we can negotiate).

I'd love to meet someone I can be completely myself with—no pretending, no walking on eggshells, just two people who genuinely enjoy each other's company.

What do I bring to the table?

- Stable career.

- Dry sense of humour.

- Can probably win any argument... but will happily let you think you did.

- Will absolutely spoil you with thoughtful gifts, surprise dates, random coffee deliveries, and unwavering hype whenever you try something new.

- Makes a solid cup of tea. This is legally important in Britain.

I'm happiest exploring new places, trying good food, binge-watching something we'll both pretend not to be addicted to, or having conversations that start with "What's for dinner?" and somehow end with "Are aliens real?"

If you're looking for someone who has left religion behind but hasn't left kindness, loyalty, or family values behind, we might get on well.

Send me a message. Worst case, we exchange memes. Best case, we have an embarrassing "So... we actually met on Reddit" story for the wedding.

Friends told me to try this sub and see if it takes me anywhere so here goes!

I'm 20 and have been an atheist for almost 10 years now. I come from an Arab shia background and would want a partner with a similar background who can speak the language and understands the culture and willing to take things slow. I am still currently closeted and probably will be for a long while so if you are as well, we could be a match!

Currently working in engineering and studying. I like certain traditional aspects of marriage, but do like a mix western & eastern culture quite a bit. I also like to keep a busy lifestyle however always make time for people. I believe I am good at communicating so want someone who is similar.

Looking for someone who is serious, ambitious, outgoing, patient, emotionally mature, non-avoidant, financially stable, curious about life and chatty.

I enjoy travelling, hiking, watching shows/movies, reading, art, learning and chatting.

Would like to have children in the future but not completely made up my mind.

Willing to relocate in the far future if the circumstances are right, but would prefer to stay in the uk (it is more accepting/safer for ex-muslims). LDR is fine for short term.

I'm a feminist, support lgbtq+, pro palestine and am somewhat left leaning although i don't involve myself in politics much anymore. No smoking/drinking etc. If you are homophobic, anti-feminism, zionist or a serial smoker/alcoholic/drug/porn addict etc pleaseee do not reach out. No hookups/adultery or wtv pls and ty

Age preference: 22-26

If you think we would get along, send me a little intro about yourself and we'll see where it takes us!

Hi I'm an ex muslim and an atheist living in Iraq. I come from a very religious family and community so I often feel isolated and emotionally drained because I have to hide who I really am.

I'm simply looking for someone I can talk to openly and honestly. If you're interested in having genuine conversations and exchanging ideas, I'd be happy to get to know you.

Thanks for reading.

Greetings!

I am an ex muslim woman and I am looking forward to finding my life partner. Please don't reach out if

1. You are looking for flings

2. You don't like building some sort of trust and friendship first

3. You are in a hurry to get married.

4. You want your partner to pretend to be religious infront of family

I love food, cinema, animals and a lot of other things- we can interact and find out more about each other.

Location- anywhere will work as long as you are willing to eventually meet and close the distance.

Physical attraction does matter so it would be nice to see each other after we have built some trust. I am 5'2 and would prefer if you're at least 5'6 - 5'7

Ty

Like anywhere else on the internet, there are scammers and people who misrepresent themselves in this subreddit too.

I've personally come across people pretending to be someone else or using fake identities, and in one instance, someone even claimed to be an ex-Muslim when they weren't.

I also spoke to someone who initially seemed kind and humble, but after I declined their proposal, they became abusive and started insulting me. Thankfully, I hadn't shared any personal information that could have been misused.

This is just a reminder for both men and women: please be cautious before sharing personal information, even something as simple as your full name. If you decide to meet someone from here, choose a public place, let a trusted friend or family member know where you'll be, and prioritize your safety.

Most people here are genuine, but it's always better to be cautious than to regret it later.

Stay safe, everyone!!

Hiii, I’m a 24 year old ex Muslim from London, for about 2 years now 🥲. I left Becuase of the sexism and homophobia mostly. I grew up with Muslims so most of my friends & siblings are all religious with a very religious mum unfortunately 🥺. Looking for some friends. Drop me your Instagram and we can connect

hi alll looking for girlfriends and a likeminded guy. i became ex-muslim properly about 4 years ago. bored as hell with this life, hopefully i dont regret posting this here

Hey there, Palestinian, agnostic, Looking for a genuine long-term relationship with someone who wants to build a life together. I currently live in the UK and would prefer to meet someone here, but I'm open to a long-distance connection at first if we're both looking for the same thing and willing to eventually close the distance

23f most likely agnostic, I don’t like to label myself. Looking for a relationship that ends in marriage with an Arab American (I will ask for identification so do not bother to try to deceive me)

-Age preferably 25-35
-American citizen born and raised (no green card hunters)
-Arab and speaks Arabic decently (I will test you)
-Sexuality must be straight.
-Established in your career and financially stable. Ambitious and wants to live a comfortable life, travel, own a house etc.
-No crazy unhinged history with drugs and alcohol like addiction.
-No criminal record. Clean digital footprint.
-Well rounded person. Raised with morals.
-Can’t be into hookup culture or have a huge past with it (I’m disgusted by it for many non religious reasons.)
-Monogamous marriage only (no open relationship)
-Nothing physical before marriage (just my personal preference as my body is sacred to me)
-Not open to his family about being exmuslim and wants to present as Muslim but live our lives our own way, i hope to move to a different state.
-Presents as Muslim in front of family.
-Into fitness and health.
-Still values marriage and wants a deep connection with someone, thoughtful, kind, respectful.
-Not selfish and respects women (that’s a tough one ik)
-Good conversationalist and educated. We can talk about our interests later.
-Can maintain a good relationship with my family.
-Dresses well and presents well.

If this describes you, shoot me a dm and introduce yourself. If you’re ever weird at one point, you’re getting blocked. I have zero tolerance for losers who are just looking for female attention, i can spot that a mile away.

Bengali 27F.

Just trying out my luck here since idk many people from Bangladesh who are atheists/agnostics. I feel like I can't relate to most people here tbh.

About me, I'm an ambivert. I'm very open minded. I get along with people easily if we vibe. I love watching films, travelling to different countries, trying out new food and although I don't cook much but, I've been said to be a good cook. I have done my bachelor's and am currently employed. I plan to settle abroad soon so would prefer someone who has the same goal.

I'm a great listener. So if you're an extrovert that's a plus for you and honestly I get along more with extroverted people. But not tooo extrovert lol.

I am ambitious so I prefer someone who is too. Having a good humor, loyalty, kindness, respectful - these are non negotiable.

I do not plan to give birth but I'm open to adopting children if it matters to my partner.

Feel free to dm on Reddit if things align (I'd prefer someone who's currently living in Bangladesh).

I’m a 27F from a Canadian Pakistani Muhajir family from Indian Punjab before partition. My parents had a cousin marriage (Mamu’s daughter weds Phopho’s son) so sadly I have two severely mentally disabled siblings and support my single mom as my dad passed away 10 years ago due to health reasons.

Due to my sensitive family situation, I have a hard time trusting people and developed some anxiety. Due to marriage pressures, I am not sure how to do it safely with someone who could pretend to be “Muslim” or find out who is genuinely trustworthy and wants to be childfree. I would greatly appreciate if anyone else from a similar background dealt with this and how to best approach dating and eventually marriage.

More background: I was born in Qatar, raised in Canada, and recently completed my master’s in environmental studies at the University of Waterloo. I’m trying my best to become financially independent, but sadly the Ontario job market has been tough. My mom is a kind supportive woman and a bit liberal-minded.

A 20 years old guy here

Not looking for relationships, just need some platonic friends to spend some good time in Islamabad. I'm currently doing an internship so I'll stay for a month and I want to explore the city too! In budget of course.

I'm from a very boring place where there is nothing fun to do & I feel like I'm the only ex Muslim there. I feel left out and detached from everything but I know this is not the case.

So this is my brief intro, I spent most of my time listening to music (mostly Pop or Indie but other genres too). I'm the type of person who will listen to my favourite songs on repeat for several hours to make sure I appreciate it enough.

I like reading books and watching netflix and I don't finish either of them most of the time. I find pleasure in buying a new book more than actually reading it (I'll read them later, there is a long life ahead! That's what my mind thinks lol).

I can play chess and badminton too and I'm an above average in both (which means I can kick your ass pretty easily /s) at least in my friend's circle.

I smoke and drink occasionally. I'm a social smoker ig?. I smoke only with my friends so I don't affect the vibe of everyone but never alone. It's just not for me when I'm alone.

I also love long walks and spending my time in nature. It's the only good thing about my place.

Personality wise, I'm a chill person but kind of an introvert and I'm not good at hiding my fake emotions or facial expressions.

So if anyone wants to be friends and thinks we might have something in common, hit me up! I'd love to meet a new person (I don't have social media so we can only meet in public).

We can eat something together, share our stories or thoughts while taking a walk in the park, or explore a new place! Anything that feels easy and comfortable for both of us.

Thanks.

Hello lovely people on here..

I'm 29 female. From Morocco.

Looking for a man.

I'm agnostic, so my dating pool is very small and reddit is the place to find my favorite type of people, the atheists, the radical leftists, the nonconformists, etc..

I'm also open to having friends, and just fun and insightful conversations. I like to discuss politics, philosophy, religion, social issues and dynamics.

I'm looking for someone intelligent, mature, respectful, 26 and older..

My flaws are that I'm moody, a bit insecure and overthinker. I'm not very social too.

Most important traits I'm looking for, intelligence, kindness, and depth. I prefer the quiet nerdy introverted type of man.

Physically, I don't have a specific physical type, unless you're overweight, then no I'm sorry. I'm fit myself, petite on the skinny side. Medium olive skin tone.

Thanks.

I'm currently based in the Maldives, where I work in a software company(but I'm not a software engineer). I enjoy learning new technologies, cooking, and continuously challenging myself to grow both personally and professionally. I'm also planning to pursue my Master's degree, most likely in the Netherlands, next year, and I'm excited about the opportunities and experiences that journey will bring.

By family background, I'm Muslim, but personally I'm agnostic. I don't strictly follow religion, though I do participate in family traditions and religious occasions out of respect. I believe faith is a personal choice, and I value kindness, honesty, and integrity more than religious labels.

I'm ambitious and career-focused. I enjoy traveling, exploring new places, trying different cuisines, watching movies, and having meaningful conversations(sometimes deeply philosophical). We may not be a good fit if you are easily offended by a joke or just easily triggered in general. I believe love isn't something you simply find it's something that grows. To me, love is the natural outcome of a relationship built on mutual respect, care, trust, and understanding.

What I'm Looking For

• Muslim background (preferably someone who is moderate, agnostic, or not deeply religious)
• Indian, open to relocating internationally
• Kind and emotionally mature
• Well educated
• Honest and communicative
• Family-oriented

If what I've shared resonates with you, I'd love to get to know you. I'm not looking for perfection just someone who's genuine, curious about life, and willing to build something meaningful together.