r/seducingwomen

Hi, David here!

Many inexperienced men believe that if they show interest, e.g. ask a girl out or try to kiss her, and the girl does not reciprocate, then it is game over.

The truth is that it all depends on your reaction to her reaction. If you go for the kiss and she turns her cheek to you, and you react by being hurt or overly apologetic, then it may likely be game over.

Same also goes if you get all sulky and butt-hurt if she turns you down for a date. But if you instead react by smiling, shrug it off, and continue the conversation as if nothing had happened, then your self-confidence may generate more attraction than if you had actually gotten what you wanted in the first place.

The most important thing when it comes to asking someone out is to do so in a low pressure way where you communicate to the other person that you will not be upset if they say no.

The longer you wait to ask someone out, the more likely it is that you will become more invested in the relationship's outcome. This will only make it harder for you to remain cool and nonreactive when interacting with the person. So quit putting it off and go for it already!

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BTW, I just finished putting together my dating advice eBook "How to Date Any Girl" version 4.0 and would LOVE to get some honest feedback from you!

I decided to give it away for free for the time being.

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The eBook is 27 pages long and gives you a practical step-by-step solution to meeting women (15+ years of knowledge put into it).

You can get the eBook by clicking here!

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This book is the result of going out and socializing with girls for over a decade. I have put in there all the fundamentals I have learned over that time so I would really appreciate all the feedback I could get!!

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What are your thoughts? Do you have any tips to add?

Let's discuss in the comments :)

Thanks for reading and have a GREAT day!

David Davidson

I'm 19, 6 feet tall, around 85 kg, and physically active. I'm posting because I genuinely want to understand what happened to my sexual health.

When I first got into a relationship with my ex-girlfriend, my sexual performance was completely normal. I had good erections, could last a long time, and most importantly, I had a strong sense of control over when I wanted to ejaculate. We had sex regularly for quite a while, and I never considered myself to have a sexual problem.

Later, we stopped having sex for a long period and became physically distant. During that time, I also stopped normal masturbation. I still watched porn, but sometimes I would masturbate by rubbing against a pillow or another surface rather than using a normal technique. Eventually, my girlfriend and I got back together and started having sex again.

That's when I noticed a huge difference. I still wanted her and genuinely wanted to have sex, but my body wasn't responding the way it used to. At first I thought it was simply because we hadn't had sex for a long time, so I told her that too.

But even masturbation didn't feel the same anymore. During sex, my arousal felt extremely intense and I felt like I had almost zero control over ejaculation. One time I ejaculated around 4 seconds after penetration. I could see the disappointment on her face, and after that I couldn't get my erection back.

That experience seriously affected my confidence. I started worrying about whether I would get hard, whether I would last, and whether I would disappoint her. Eventually I started avoiding meeting her because I was so insecure, and our relationship ended.

I've also tried Viagra a few times. At first it seemed to help with getting an erection, but it didn't solve the main problem. Even when I could get hard, I still had extremely strong sensations and almost no control over ejaculation.

I've tried Kegels, gym/exercise, changing my masturbation habits, and various things I've found online, but nothing has really fixed it.

Now, if I receive sexual stimulation, I can sometimes ejaculate in under 10 seconds. With oral stimulation, I may last around 10–15 seconds at most.

Another strange thing is what happens mentally after ejaculation. Sometimes I suddenly feel extremely irritated, regretful, or even start disliking the girl I was just attracted to. I can think, "Why did I do this?" or feel like I completely lost interest. I don't know if this is related to anxiety, arousal, porn, hormones, or something else.

My masturbation habits are also unusual now. I don't really get much pleasure from normal masturbation. I usually use a very tight grip and repetitive rubbing, and sometimes I don't feel much sensation at all.

What confuses me most is that I didn't always have this problem. I previously had good erections, good stamina, and good ejaculation control. Now I feel like I have almost no control, and sometimes I also struggle to maintain an erection when anxiety kicks in.

I'm only 19, and this has already affected my confidence, relationships, and willingness to have sex.

So I'm trying to understand what could be happening.

Could this be premature ejaculation? Could performance anxiety be causing or worsening it? Could my masturbation habits or porn consumption have affected my arousal/sensitivity? Could there be a pelvic-floor or physical issue? Or could something else be going on?

If anyone has experienced something similar — especially someone who used to have normal sexual control and then developed very rapid ejaculation and/or erection problems — I'd really appreciate hearing what you eventually discovered and what actually helped.

I'm not looking for a miracle supplement or random internet cure. I want to understand the problem properly and figure out what I should research or whether I should see a urologist/sexual-health doctor.

Any serious advice or personal experience would be appreciated.

I’m wondering about what all do you think about confronting directly if you like someone or just cold approaching someone you find attractive. I’m done with this constant self-rejection. Even the dating apps seem to be more of a trap since they barely work and are built in a way to keep
You searching for more. Whenever I go out to cyberhub, galleria or malls (DLF noida/Saket Select city etc.) I see even average or below average looking guys beg really pretty women I really don’t get where are they getting them from do they know them from before or like where do they even meet from. I never understood where do they all get them from but if it was dating app then it would only be impossible for them to get that pretty women. I just feel lost in life and don’t understand about what should I even do regarding the same.

Alright so I met this woman at a party and here is how the conversation went;

Me: Hi

Her: Hey

Me: Has anyone told you you did that dress a favor by wearing it? Because you look really stunning.

Her: Look, I know I'm pretty, but honestly such kinds of conversations really bore me. Could we just have a normal conversation? Please?

Me: Got it. So what kind of work do you do?

Her: I don't work.

Me: Oh. Well, what would your dream career be?

Her: Owning a hardware and cosmetics store.

Me: Interesting. Is there a relationship between the two?

Her: Fucking hell! You and your questions. So what if there is or isn't a relationship, huh? What will you do with that information? Why don't you just get to know someone first before asking these dumb ass questions?

Me: I thought being curious and asking questions how I get to know you?

Her: \* sigh \* Tsk \[Walks away\]

I admit the compliment might have been a little too strong (Fuck you, Heineken.) But when she let me know she was uncomfortable, I tried to recalibrate. I don't know why she ended up exploding on me. What do you think I might have done better?

My gf(51F) and I(54M) have been dating for about 3 months now..and our sex life is incredible. Just for reference we are not your typical 50somerhings. We're very young at heart ..we work hard and play harder. Anyway, whenever ever we are engaged in any type of intimacy or sexual banter she finds the need to always say that its my dick she wants or that she wouldn't feel like she does if it wasn't for me or with me..

For example , I might say ," you like getting fucked baby" and her response would be , " yes, i like being fucked by you".

And I totally understand the need to express ones desire etc to the person that you're with, however when we are in the heat of intense sexual arousal, part of the excitement and enhancement is our dirty banter...so I don't feel that's accurate to say this every time or all the time . I think it would be normal to say, *yes, baby i liked being fucked." it just seems more authentic and real.

For some reason , I feel like she's thinks i need some over reassurance or that she's just trying to convince herself of something. Either way , we have discussions but its always the same .

I guess my problem is that it can be an emotional set up for disaster when or if those desires manifest and change ..and then I'm left with disappointment and made to believe something that I already knew was inherently not true or realistic ...

I finally got tired of waiting to have a girlfriend to have sex, or even have the chance. I only got to that point once, so I'm pretty inexperienced when it comes to seduction and even more with hook-ups. I'm trying to up my skills at seducing and understanding the unwritten rules of casual meetings. Really, I'm asking for even the more essential advice you can think of, because even the most obvious things can be not-so clear for someone as inexperienced as me. For example, some years ago I did not even know how to properly socialize and when I found out that asking questions about the other person was a good way, I really was impressed by how I did not think of it before.

Some tips I'd like to know could be:

- How are conversations handled in a relationship like this? Should I take it while relaxing, tryna be myself and not preoccupy or should I strive to be more seductive? I mean, is it necessary for me to persuade the girl?

- Secondly, how can I be seductive? I mean, literally, what should I say? Which topics should I avoid and which should I prioritize? Is it simply saying compliments or is there another way? Which compliments should I use? How can my personality be seductive? Is it confidence, is it smoothness? How can I be smooth?

- Third, what should I avoid saying or how should I act if I screw up?

Anyways, those are all my biggest concerns right now, I'm y'all can give me some good advice for at least some of my concerns. I know the best way to learn is to try, test and learn from my errors, but at least I'd like to have a base, knowing the basics, especially in a world I know so little about. And I know, doesn't matter the situation, the condom stays on.