Do I sound like an angsty teenager?
I often enjoy writing on the more "silly" side (always loved Shel Silverstein) and there's evidence of that in this poem, but ultimately it's a sad poem. I like the tone, but I'm curious what other readers think of it. Do you find it odd? Do I sound like an angsty teenager? (I'm an adult.)
Rhinoceros
I am a rhinoceros
A wild and lovely sight
Armed and armored, yet somehow
As if a docile dairy cow
I know not how to fight
I'm an unassuming beast
Though fearsome to behold
My beautiful and striking blade
that's so enchantingly displayed
Is worth its weight in gold
Yes! I'm a rhinoceros!
I'm treasured and I'm prized!
But he who treasures only cares
To snag me in his hidden snare,
His powers exercised.
My sword is quickly overcome
And taken from my frame
My armor an illusion; it
Protects me not, and here I sit,
Rhinoceros, but maimed.