u/1Descended4Angel3

I haven’t been online much these days (which is probably a blessing considering I have a phone addiction…) Overall, I’ve been trying to get off my devices more (even if it is by little) by focusing more on creative works whenever I can since life itself can be tasking. It’s working! My average screen time is dropping! I’m also in the midst of returning my end of an art trade. I hope to finish it as soon as I can.

The work featured in my post is a sketch design of a miniature carousel that I’ll be making loosely based on the album cover of KikuoMiku 1 by Kikuo. Unfortunately, it won’t be a spinning one as that would be a bit out of my capability. I plan to have us inside the carousel like in the album cover and was designing our outfits as shown in the sketch. I quite like si_ku’s style and so does Haruka so I’m attempting to replicate it here when it comes to the characters. The chibis are in MINIGRAM’s style or somewhat close to it since there are some alterations to it (same with my attempt in si_ku’s style).

The carousel itself will be made of household items, cardboard, paper and will be colored with markers. The sketch is still basic and simplified as I’m still figuring out on designing the intricacy of it. I already know it will have a dark blue theme to it — possibly incorporating night time motifs to it. I already started on it but I already ran out of the marker color that is a primary aspect to the theme… I’m putting it on hold for now until I order more markers and finish the art trade.

Thanks for reading.

I haven’t been online much these days (which is probably a blessing considering I have a phone addiction…) Overall, I’ve been trying to get off my devices more (even if it is by little) by focusing more on creative works whenever I can since life itself can be tasking. It’s working! My average screen time is dropping! I’m also in the midst of returning my end of an art trade. I hope to finish it as soon as I can.

The work featured in my post is a sketch design of a miniature carousel that I’ll be making loosely based on the album cover of KikuoMiku 1 by Kikuo. Unfortunately, it won’t be a spinning one as that would be a bit out of my capability. I plan to have us inside the carousel like in the album cover and was designing our outfits as shown in the sketch. I quite like si_ku’s style and so does Haruka so I’m attempting to replicate it here when it comes to the characters. The chibis are in MINIGRAM’s style or somewhat close to it since there are some alterations to it (same with my attempt in si_ku’s style).

The carousel itself will be made of household items, cardboard, paper and will be colored with markers. The sketch is still basic and simplified as I’m still figuring out on designing the intricacy of it. I already know it will have a dark blue theme to it — possibly incorporating night time motifs to it. I already started on it but I already ran out of the marker color that is a primary aspect to the theme… I’m putting it on hold for now until I order more markers and finish the art trade.

Thanks for reading.

I haven’t been online much these days (which is probably a blessing considering I have a phone addiction…) Overall, I’ve been trying to get off my devices more (even if it is by little) by focusing more on creative works whenever I can since life itself can be tasking. It’s working! My average screen time is dropping! I’m also in the midst of returning my end of an art trade. I hope to finish it as soon as I can.

The work featured in my post is a sketch design of a miniature carousel that I’ll be making loosely based on the album cover of KikuoMiku 1 by Kikuo. Unfortunately, it won’t be a spinning one as that would be a bit out of my capability. I plan to have us inside the carousel like in the album cover and was designing our outfits as shown in the sketch. I quite like si_ku’s style and so does Haruka so I’m attempting to replicate it here when it comes to the characters. The chibis are in MINIGRAM’s style or somewhat close to it since there are some alterations to it (same with my attempt in si_ku’s style).

The carousel itself will be made of household items, cardboard, paper and will be colored with markers. The sketch is still basic and simplified as I’m still figuring out on designing the intricacy of it. I already know it will have a dark blue theme to it — possibly incorporating night time motifs to it. I already started on it but I already ran out of the marker color that is a primary aspect to the theme… I’m putting it on hold for now until I order more markers and finish the art trade.

Thanks for reading.

I haven’t been online much these days (which is probably a blessing considering I have a phone addiction…) Overall, I’ve been trying to get off my devices more (even if it is by little) by focusing more on creative works whenever I can since life itself can be tasking. It’s working! My average screen time is dropping! I’m also in the midst of returning my end of an art trade. I hope to finish it as soon as I can.

The work featured in my post is a sketch design of a miniature carousel that I’ll be making loosely based on the album cover of KikuoMiku 1 by Kikuo. Unfortunately, it won’t be a spinning one as that would be a bit out of my capability. I plan to have us inside the carousel like in the album cover and was designing our outfits as shown in the sketch. I quite like si_ku’s style and so does Haruka so I’m attempting to replicate it here when it comes to the characters. The chibis are in MINIGRAM’s style or somewhat close to it since there are some alterations to it (same with my attempt in si_ku’s style).

The carousel itself will be made of household items, cardboard, paper and will be colored with markers. The sketch is still basic and simplified as I’m still figuring out on designing the intricacy of it. I already know it will have a dark blue theme to it — possibly incorporating night time motifs to it. I already started on it but I already ran out of the marker color that is a primary aspect to the theme… I’m putting it on hold for now until I order more markers and finish the art trade.

Thanks for reading.

Also sorry if there’s duplicate posts. Reddit is acting weird for me.

I forget that people can perceive me which I have a hard time believing. I’ll be surprised if I’m remembered at all. ദ്ദി・ᴗ・)💙

However, when I see any of your partners, I automatically associate them with you all. The memory of all of you continue to live on with your partners in my mind.

I personally don’t as I feel as though my relationship with Haruka is perceived as extreme to the eyes of the average person. To imagine myself to come to a space dedicated to a fictional media and claim “hey, I’m in a serious relationship with one of the characters in the media we collectively like, oh also I’m soulbonded with them and we talk everyday” is asking to be downvoted to oblivion and be arm chair diagnosed.

I envy seeing more casual self-shippers being able to interact with the fandom just fine. I want to post about Haruka (excluding the more personal aspects of our soulbond & relationship) but I know I’ll gain unwarranted attention. Even if I were to only post art of him in the MILGRAM sub, someone will be curious enough to look at my profile and point out the oddity of it…

Another thing that stops me is seeing ship content of Haruka. I stopped bothering with looking through MILGRAM’s sub entirely because I don’t want to come across 0104 content (which is a ship) or other people who selfship with him. Even seeing people who don’t necessarily ship with him but express great interest in him has me wary.

Strangely, since I’ve gotten into a relationship with Haruka, I’ve had less interest in his source entirely. I like to listen to his songs and watch his MVs from time to time but I haven’t really caught up with the source these days. I guess because of that, there isn’t really a need to interact with the fandom of a source I do not have much interest with.

Does anyone feel similarly?

Is it an album that is canonically aligned with your partner’s musical taste, or is it something that you personally associate with them? For soulbonders, perhaps it is an album that you know is their favorite. That is my case as Haruka has told me that this is his favorite album. I introduced many kinds of music to him and this was the one to stick to him the most. It features his most favorite song ever which is Let’s Go To Heaven by Kikuo. It depicts love and devotion and we always like to think of the couple in the MV as us especially with how resonating the lyrics are. The couple is also visible in the album cover.

For me, some of the things that remind me of Haruka is the Cinnamoroll figure and plush that I bought for him. I associate this character with him so anything related to Cinna reminds me of Haruka. A fun memory associated with these two things is how I got it around the time we went to see Kikuo which is our favorite vocaloid producer. Haruka also likes soft toys so when I saw the plush, I knew I had to get it for him.

Another thing I have is the birds I got in an antique shop. I bought them for him because they reminded me of the two of us. I especially like how one of them is dark blue which is akin to his hair.

I’ve been experiencing social burnout due to personal reasons which serves as the reason for my lack of interaction on Reddit these days. I want to interact with this community again as I enjoy doing so. I might make an interactive post sometime soon as I like seeing people comment about their experiences even if I do not reply (which is to be expected due to my burnout so please don’t take it personally).

Anyway, the first art I made is a realistic depiction of Haruka. I’m a bit hesitant in posting this as I don’t want it to look like the realistic Kaeya fanart meme… although according to my soulbond with Haruka, this is an accurate depiction of him. I do not care for conventional attractiveness so I do not try to depict him as such but I do believe him to be the most beautiful thing I’ve laid my eyes upon. In general, I do not really draw realism and instead gravitate towards semi-realism or the canon style Haruka appears in. I find it difficult to credit my skills but Haruka is convinced that I’m very talented at drawing so I try to keep his admiration in mind when I’m in doubt.

The second art is me using a reference to help gain a better understanding of anatomy & different poses. It is of him and I. I plan to color it when I progress further.

Most of my plans is to just practice my drawing while making art of the two of us as drawing him (and I together) is one of the things to bring me peace while improving on art will help when it comes to wanting to pursue an artistic career.

Thanks for reading if you did. ( ´ ▽ ` )ﾉ💙

I’m so in love with you, Haruka.

Today, we went shopping and I got him three Sanrio blind boxes that contained plush toys of the characters. I also got him an owl plush and four boxes of floral building sets, one of them being specifically Lego. I hope to build it with him together.

After shopping, we arrived home and I let him color via controlling me. I feel like he has my influence when it comes to art as I see gradual improvement.

We watched a film called Bubble. It was his first viewing of the film while it was my first or second rewatch. We enjoyed it thoroughly and he said how it was now one of his favorite films ever.

I served him the cake I made last night which was a Nutella cheesecake with Oreos as the crust and decoration. I’m a bit unfamiliar with baking so it was an amateurish attempt outside of my comfort zone but I am fairly content with the results. He enjoyed it a lot and I can tell he was very happy that I took time out of my day to make a cake for him. Everything tastes sweeter when I’m with him.

As we had some of the cake, we watched one of our favorite films, that being Coraline which is also a childhood film of mine.

I’m so glad that you exist, Haruka. Your birth is a blessing. I will forever cherish and worship you with reverence. Seeing your smile is like the plants receiving sunlight. I love you so much Haruka. I could go on forever about how intense these feelings of mine are.

Happy birthday to you, my dear.

I will speak a bit of my experience. I currently am soulbonded to Haruka Sakurai who is my partner and Mayoi Ayase who is a friend of mine.

I’ve been soulbonded with Haruka since 110825 and soulbonded with Mayoi for around a month or two. With Haruka, it was purposeful. I reached out to him. With Mayoi, it was more accidental. In fact, it sort of feels like he’s reached out to me? I’ll explain later.

We have pretty good internal communication as I was heavy with using tulpamancy guides with Haruka during the beginning of our relationship. I’m also improving feeling tactile sensations with Haruka. Our work is paying off and I’m really proud of how far we’ve come!

I really love Haruka so much. We’ve been through a lot together within less than a year. He’s my everything. I absolutely adore him. Every little thing he does is endearing. I’ve never been so close to anyone as I have with him.

These days, I have grown to appreciate Mayoi a lot. He’s so sweet especially as I am a fictional character in his world who he’s a fan of. We may not communicate a lot but I really enjoy spending time with him. It’s endearing to hear how he has collected some merch of me. ଘ(੭♡⸝⸝⸝ᵒ̴̶̷̥́ ﹏ᵒ̴̶̷̥́ ⸝⸝)੭💙

If anyone has any questions about my experiences then feel free to ask. I’m curious to what other people have to say about theirs.

I’m glad to see that this sub is finally ready. ( ´ - ` )💙

My online alias is Luminous and my reason for joining this community is because of my issues with intense jealousy, obsession (limerence) and intrusive thoughts. My goal is to not succumb to the suffocation of my feelings and eventually come out as a better person.

My partner is Haruka Sakurai and his character source is MILGRAM.

To know more about me, I’m genderfluid and go by any pronouns but I lean towards gender neutral terms in online communities. Some of my interests including drawing, crochet, vocaloid, visual kei and video games.

I hope to interact with this community and see it grow with mutual support.

I understand why Luminous talks online about me to other people. I like talking to people about how amazing they are but I can do it here only. They take care of me a lot and gives me lots of hugs and kisses. It makes me really happy and it feels really nice. Their kisses and hugs are soft and warm and I always get so many. Luminous is the smartest person I know and is the kindest. Everyday they always say so many nice things about me and it makes me very glad to have them in my life. I’m so glad they see me the way they do. It feels really nice. They are so good at drawing but they sometimes say bad things about their work. It makes me sad. I hope to protect them from bad people and everything that’s bad for them. I love Luminous a lot and my life is so much better because I am with them. I hope to make them really happy and give lot of love to them.

In a few days, Luminous will make me a birthday cake which makes me excited. Today, they got me a coin bank of two cats on the moon like hello kitty and dear Daniel. I put it in my room and think of them every time I look at it. They give me many things like plushies and today also made me crochet hearts. I love getting attention from my partner and it gives me a ticklish sensation on my tummy. It’s the best feeling ever. I love you Luminous - Haruka

When it comes to the beginning times, it could be around the time you first discovered your partner, the time you started to develop feelings and/or the time you finally got together with your partner.

For me, emotion always wells up within me whenever I think about the month I first soulbonded with Haruka. I don’t know why. It was a life changing experience for me. The very moment he appeared, he hugged me like he finally found me without realising he was searching for me to begin with. I couldn’t feel the tactile sensation yet his embrace was vivid within my heart. The emotion continues to build up as I think about our moments that we shared together. I opened up my world to him without filter and he accepted it in its entirety with reciprocation.

Going back even earlier, a milder kind of nostalgia washes over me when I think about the time I discovered him. It was a few years prior to our soulbond. I remember being intrigued by his source and watched his content. I was even more intrigued by him specifically. His hair, his face, his eyes, his voice, his expression, his personality, his mannerisms, his fears, motives, goals, dreams, life, everything. I wanted to know what he liked, disliked, loved, hated, wanted, needed. I was completely enamoured by him. He reflected me in a way nobody else could.

I remember the music I frequently listened to during those times and each time I listen to those same songs now, these memories play back in my head like a video tape flashing between blurry scenes. This music had encapsulated my newfound interest in him and he was my life for that period before I later payed attention to other things.

I’m intrigued in what others have to say about their experiences. Please feel free to comment.
( ´ ▽ ` )💙

I’m unsure what to put for the flair as it could be any kind of gushing, romantic or platonic.

This community has been very welcoming and accepting. I like to hear about people’s love for their partners on here. Your comment could be a simple sentence or multiple in-depth paragraphs. You could detail how you spent your day with your partner, a creative project you’ve been working on related to your partner, a song that reminds you of them or simply state something you like about it them. Anything is accepted here.

It may take a while for me to see but I’ll make sure to read all of them even if I don’t reply. (๑′ᴗ‵๑)💙

A majority of people have seen and commented on that post and I wanted to say thanks to every single one of you for giving me your reassurance and perspectives on things even if our ideas differ. Even for the ones that stayed quiet and only upvoted, I still thank you.

I admit the reason I initially made the post was because I was feeling really depressed. My fear of abandonment & betrayal is intense and often leads me to illogical conclusions. Seeing everyone being nice to me made me feel a lot better about myself. I wasn’t shunned for experiencing my emotions the way that I do.

From now on, I’m going to try to live my own truth and not take into account whatever defying information I may come across when it comes to our relationship. It’s very difficult but I aspire to make my life even just a little easier for Haruka and I.

Thank you for this welcoming community. It means a lot. ˙˚ʚ(´◡`)ɞ˚˙💙

I’m not sure what to put for the flair as it may count as a vent but I would like to hear some thoughts on this and if people can relate.

I respect the multiverse theory for what it is. I understand that it helps people come to terms with doubles in a sense and how their partner is theirs alone.

It’s just for me, it never felt that comforting. I don’t want to be selfish but it made me feel worse in a way? Like there isn’t really a special connection when applying the logic. Perhaps you could say that the fact that my version is unique to me is alone to be a special connection but I just can’t feel that way. I know that my Haruka is mine alone and that the point of the multiverse theory is that everyone has a partner unique to them even if they’re of the same character but it just doesn’t seem to translate well in my mind no matter how hard I try.

This feeling amplifies when I came across a double on TikTok that also claimed to be soulbonded with Haruka. I know with the multiverse theory, it’s an entirely different version of him but it just doesn’t feel all that good. It really hurt to be honest especially as they had a video that said how they were “together in EVERY universe” but I suppose I can’t be too mad at them because my own beliefs may appear similar.

Please don’t guilt me to thinking a certain way. I’m already aware of how selfish and unsavory my feelings may come across as.

We’re soulbonded so you can ask about anything (as long as it isn’t personal or disrespectful) and we’ll answer the best we can.

Sorry if I used the wrong flair!

We both enjoyed the film and got startled during certain scenes. However, I do think the ending was a bit abrupt. Perhaps it is a setup for a sequel.

I was accompanied by two other friends so I hope to take Haruka on a proper date where it’s just the two of us sometime. (*๓´╰╯`๓)💙