u/35Slick

Help for cell phone bill

REQ: $70,NY,repay $90 on 9/14, cash-app/ Venmo/Apple Cash, missed paying phone bill now it’s off need it for work

Feel I find myself alone
in a room full of faces,
No place to call a home
a life full of displacement.

Voices I seek to silence
screaming louder than life,
History filled with violence
full of struggle and strife.

Reflection in the mirror
one that I can't stand,
Seeing life a little clearer
always been a one man band.

Beaten down by words of hate
seems in everything I do,
Always knew this was my fate
unsure why I fight it's truth.

I grow weaker with each day
almost can feel my body struggle,
Everybody's walked away
so unworthy of their troubles.

Tortured by the madness
struggling to make it out,
Better off being lifeless
all I do is let folks down.

Laughter no longer possible
constantly just overwhelmed,
Nothing but an obsticle
no one steering at my helm.

Communication through addiction
finds us in this fractured state,
Once again I did some bitch shit
didn't stop to contemplate.

Acussations fueled rage
you said stay out my mind,
Had my self wrapped in a cage
each new argument Id find.

The confrontations I avoided
manufacturing this here life,
So self righteously appointed
swore I deserved you as my wife.

Feels like destruction I do best
making sure things fall apart,
Started out both feeling blessed
now remains two shredded hearts.

It seems I've reached an empass
time to bury my worst traits,
Seek higher ground a new path
or is this destination my true fate.

Tired of wasting heart felt words
that always fall upon deaf ears,
Tired of begging a few minutes
of those I find worth years.

Tired of the judgement
because I have a heart to care,
Tired of the convalescence
my state can’t mentally repair.

Tired of this life I live,
like I’m always locked in struggle,
Tired of the blame you give
pass the buck on all your troubles.

Tired of being the bad guy,
like my heart don't fuckin matter.
Tired of the sleepless nights
the way I crave your laughter.

Tired of the sadness felt
seems I never make the mark,
Tired of the recklessness
the way you bleed my heart.

Tired of this darkness,
finally sick of endless fights,
Tired of wishing I was stronger
need strength to end this life.

Tired of writing down this story,
finally broken to my core
Tired of asking for a shot at us
guess I’ll just barricade that door.

Counting back my yesterday’s have no worries for tomorrow, Play memories back in every way see my time with you is borrowed.

Never seeking to be found always hiding in the dark, Then that day you came around captivating my whole heart.

Fires ragged within my soul refused to be snuffed out, Perfectly you filled the roll as if we were playing house.

Tragically things came about now we’re in this empty place, Wish we could find a turn around know we need a saving grace.

Venomous can be our words poisoning in countless ways, Speaking them truly absurd silence the key to saving face.

Much more this is than just a note many things still left unsaid, I love you more than all my quotes, fix this thing before I’m dead.

Send this off in final verse hope there’s chapters left to fill, Apologize for all the hurt don’t want to alter your free will.

You can't begin to fathom all the demons
that I face. Each day's a constant struggle just
hoping for some faith.

Things I need to change, wish I listened
to the lessons, having you beside me
was far beyond a blessing.

I foolishy betrayed you, of your love
I took advantage, consequences I now
face I can't even fucking manage.

You told me I'd be bad for you,
I guess that shit was true,
turned out to be a travesty,
that left you feeling used.

I promised you the moon,
with no way I could deliver,
You were busy loving me,
while I blew lines and sipped my liquor.

Now there's someone new with you,
and yeah it kinda makes me sick...
I know that he's the better man,
maybe I should shut my lips.

Yeah I'm outta line right now,
don't stop listening just yet,
I know I killed our dreams,
before the ink had set.

I know this doesn't matter,
my existence out your mind,
I'm thanking you for loving me,
apologize for running blind.

Tired of wasting heart felt words
that always fall upon deaf ears,
Tired of begging a few minutes
of those I find worth years.

Tired of the judgement
because I have a heart to care,
Tired of the convalescence
my state can’t mentally repair.

Tired of this life I live,
like I’m always locked in struggle,
Tired of the blame you give
pass the buck on all your troubles.

Tired of being the bad guy,
like my heart don't fuckin matter.
Tired of the sleepless nights
the way I crave your laughter.

Tired of the sadness felt
seems I never make the mark,
Tired of the recklessness
the way you bleed my heart.

Tired of this darkness,
finally sick of endless fights,
Tired of wishing I was stronger
need strength to end this life.

Tired of writing down this story,
finally broken to my core
Tired of asking for a shot at us
guess I’ll just barricade that door.

Counting back my yesterday’s have no worries for tomorrow, Play memories back in every way see my time with you is borrowed.

Never seeking to be found always hiding in the dark, Then that day you came around captivating my whole heart.

Fires ragged within my soul refused to be snuffed out, Perfectly you filled the roll as if we were playing house.

Tragically things came about now we’re in this empty place, Wish we could find a turn around know we need a saving grace.

Venomous can be our words poisoning in countless ways, Speaking them truly absurd silence the key to saving face.

Much more this is than just a note many things still left unsaid, I love you more than all my quotes, fix this thing before I’m dead.

Send this off in final verse hope there’s chapters left to fill, Apologize for all the hurt don’t want to alter your free will.

All we do is fight these days
spitting words straight full of hurt,
so much for all our yesterdays
when we knew each others worth.

Can’t fathom you don’t like me
used to show me so much love,
Don’t wanna take this lightly
suddenly I’m not enough.

Everyday it’s something new
not sure how much that I can take,
Wish we could rewind a few
knowing this is not our fate.

You tell me that I never cared
and how I always let you down,
Wishing the I love you’s spared
left you feeling like a clown.

Here I have this final thought
one last thing I beg you ponder,
This love for once we fought
will simply now just wander.

All we do is fight these days
spitting words straight full of hurt,
so much for all our yesterdays
when we knew each others worth.

Can’t fathom you don’t like me
used to show me so much love,
Don’t wanna take this lightly
suddenly I’m not enough.

Everyday it’s something new
not sure how much that I can take,
Wish we could rewind a few
knowing this is not our fate.

You tell me that I never cared
and how I always let you down,
Wishing the I love you’s spared
left you feeling like a clown.

Here I have this final thought
one last thing I beg you ponder,
This love for once we fought
will simply now just wander.

Wish you could feel I’m sorry
for all the hell I’ve caused,
The pain inside that’s scarred me
and created all these flaws.

I hurt you in so many ways
most folks just can’t imagine,
Thinking of those better days,
knowing plenty we have had them.

Pieces from another life
way before we ever met,
Even though your now my wife
seems this shit we can’t forget.

Separation from our yesterdays
now the only chance we’ll have,
Knowing if we stay this way
not a chance that we will last.

Liquor seems our kryptonite
sends us each into a rage,
we can say that’s not our life
it’s getting older as we age.

Time to shift the focus
build ourselves a better path,
if we can this shit is hopeless
all that’s left will be our past.

Take my hand and follow me
for I found us a new road,
Even if you’re struggling
I will carry both our loads.

Thats what you call love
shit is realer than can be,
souls both fitting like a glove
without you there is no me.

My existence was irrelevant
until you walked into my life,
let’s just say for hell of it
you relieved me of my strife.

Struggles all I ever knew
until the day you brought me hope,
Fucked around a time or two
always left me feeling broke.

These dreams we had were shattered
long before they stood a chance,
Come together 2 lives tattered
not a novelists romance.

We’ve overcome each obstacle
and the reason for their cause,
Together we’re unstoppable
keep pushing past our flaws.

Wish you could feel I’m sorry
for all the hell I’ve caused,
The pain inside that’s scarred me
and created all these flaws.

I hurt you in so many ways
most folks just can’t imagine,
Thinking of those better days,
knowing plenty we have had them.

Pieces from another life
way before we ever met,
Even though your now my wife
seems this shit we can’t forget.

Separation from our yesterdays
now the only chance we’ll have,
Knowing if we stay this way
not a chance that we will last.

Liquor seems our kryptonite
sends us each into a rage,
we can say that’s not our life
it’s getting older as we age.

Time to shift the focus
build ourselves a better path,
if we can this shit is hopeless
all that’s left will be our past.

Take my hand and follow me
for I found us a new road,
Even if you’re struggling
I will carry both our loads.

Thats what you call love
shit is realer than can be,
souls both fitting like a glove
without you there is no me.

My existence was irrelevant
until you walked into my life,
let’s just say for hell of it
you relieved me of my strife.

Struggles all I ever knew
until the day you brought me hope,
Fucked around a time or two
always left me feeling broke.

These dreams we had were shattered
long before they stood a chance,
Come together 2 lives tattered
not a novelists romance.

We’ve overcome each obstacle
and the reason for their cause,
Together we’re unstoppable
keep pushing past our flaws.

Time it seems escapes me
as I’m sure is true for most,
Contemplating what my fate be
now it’s got me chasing ghost.

Some days I can’t remember
most years are etched in stone,
For your love I will surrender
it’s like I know it in my bones.

Hours I’ve spent pondering
the things our future holds,
Now I’m just left wondering
alone out in the cold.

We broke down in so many ways
comprehensions out of sight,
Persistently begged you to stay
until I saw your fading lights.

Left here with the ghost of you
memories don’t seem to fade
Wishing for a love renewed
I’m just trapped here in this cage.

All we do is fight these days
spitting words straight full of hurt,
so much for all our yesterdays
when we knew each others worth.

Can’t fathom you don’t like me
used to show me so much love,
Don’t wanna take this lightly
suddenly I’m not enough.

Everyday it’s something new
not sure how much that I can take,
Wish we could rewind a few
knowing this is not our fate.

You tell me that I never cared
and how I always let you down,
Wishing the I love you’s spared
left you feeling like a clown.

Here I have this final thought
one last thing I beg you ponder,
This love for once we fought
will simply now just wander.

All we do is fight these days
spitting words straight full of hurt,
so much for all our yesterdays
when we knew each others worth.

Can’t fathom you don’t like me
used to show me so much love,
Don’t wanna take this lightly
suddenly I’m not enough.

Everyday it’s something new
not sure how much that I can take,
Wish we could rewind a few
knowing this is not our fate.

You tell me that I never cared
and how I always let you down,
Wishing the I love you’s spared
left you feeling like a clown.

Here I have this final thought
one last thing I beg you ponder,
This love for once we fought
will simply now just wander.