You got this
Write down how you want to quit
Do you want to use an app? An audio book?
Use what you feel comfortable with (patch,gum,lozenges)
Go easy on yourself
Quitting smoking can feel hard,do whatever you feel comfortable with ( example: don’t beat yourself up if you have a cigarette,be in the moment,ask yourself what’s working for you)
I believe in you
Hurts I’m not your person
I know feelings can be scary
People fuck up
It all depends on how we handle the aftermath
Being an adult/friend means (in my eyes),taking the good with the bad,acknowledging when you fucked up,apologizing for shitty behavior,being accountable with your actions and behaviors
I’m not blaming or pointing fingers
I’m saying I miss you as my friend
I feel so confused and hurt about last year
How do you see me?
What am I to you?
The book “How to be an Adult in Relationships” has helped me a lot in how to mindfully love
I love you
All of you
You deserve love
I don’t know what your plan is (I don’t know if you intend to reach out to me or not considering what happened last year)
I wanted to give you a heads up that I will be in British Columbia in September from sunday til monday.
I’m doing this as a courtesy.
I don’t expect a response.
I don’t expect anything.
I hope you are doing good.
His memoir has been eye opening in regards to how addicts feel during addiction
I have severe ADHD (struggle to form a verbal sentence unless I’m medicated),autistic,and auditory processing disorder
I’ve dabbled in drugs in my late teens and early 20’s
I thought I could self medicate with meth when I was 19..?
In chapter 10,Perry talks about how opioid use led to his colon exploding,had a bowling ball sized hole in his stomach (didn’t know that was even possible) and you what he asked the doctor to prescribe him?
OPIATES
His colon exploded
He was placed on EPAC (not sure if that’s how it’s spelled) machine. (I think that helps you breathe)
Was in a coma for 14 days and had to learn how to walk
This happened to him in 2018 (I think)
When I was 22,I took coke on a mostly empty stomach.
I ended up having a seizure and was in a coma for 3 days
Missed my birthday
You know what I wanted to do when I went home?
More coke
This was 20 years ago
Turns out, there is a link between ADHD addictive behaviors
I believe the only reason I’m not doing coke right now is because I got diagnosed for ADHD and got a prescription for Adderall
Adderall (for me) is a life saving drug
Vyvanse is a lifesaver as well
My question is,anyone else experience addictive behaviors as well?
EDIT: I have codependency issues and I feel like that alone can lead to addictive behaviors.
Thoughts?
His memoir has been eye opening in regards to how addicts feel during addiction
I have severe ADHD (struggle to form a verbal sentence unless I’m medicated),autistic,and auditory processing disorder
I’ve dabbled in drugs in my late teens and early 20’s
I thought I could self medicate with meth when I was 19..?
In chapter 10,Perry talks about how opioid use led to his colon exploding,had a bowling ball sized hole in his stomach (didn’t know that was even possible) and you what he asked the doctor to prescribe him?
OPIATES
His colon exploded
He was placed on EPAC (not sure if that’s how it’s spelled) machine. (I think that helps you breathe)
Was in a coma for 14 days and had to learn how to walk
This happened to him in 2018 (I think)
When I was 22,I took coke on a mostly empty stomach.
I ended up having a seizure and was in a coma for 3 days
Missed my birthday
You know what I wanted to do when I went home?
More coke
Turns out, there is a link between ADHD addictive behaviors
My question is,anyone else experience addictive behaviors as well?
The text says :
“In previous chapters,we’ve framed addiction as a disease. People have an addiction because they have a disease,not because they’re unkind,selfish,or immoral.
Their addiction doesn’t define them. I’ve seen this first hand many hundreds of times where people who once engaged in awful behaviors and treated other people horribly were returned to thoughtful,loving caring people once they were
in recovery and had taken care to undergo the healing that comes from proper addiction treatment.
So,detachment isn’t about detaching from the person,it’s about detaching from the disease and the chaos,dysfunction,and horrible behaviors that it entails.
Detachment isn’t about coldly distancing ourselves from the addict;it’s about correcting a dysfunctional relationship with someone we love.”
You are allowed to have boundaries
You are allowed to say “If you treat me with disrespect, I will end this conversation.”
That’s not mean.
That’s showing yourself love
You can love someone but you don’t have to be involved in the chaos
When they are ready to clean their side of the street (be respectful to you and themselves), you can invite them back into your life.
Be kind
Let’s try to understand one another
Dear K,
I’m sorry I didn’t read about addiction sooner
I was incredibly naive and thought you had everything under control (like how I handle my ADHD)
I’m sorry I didn’t give you your space
I’m sorry I didn’t stick to my boundaries
I have worked a little bit on my codependence
I know if we started talking now,I might struggle with setting boundaries and might slip into codependence with you
It hurts so much that you don’t see me romantically anymore
It hurts that you don’t want me as your person
I want to see you
I want to be your cheerleader
I want to be your shoulder to cry on
I still think about you
I’ll always love you
You’ll always be in my heart
If you don’t see me as your person,please give me a chance to get over you
Then,we can talk
Then we can be friends
I love you
Please be gentle with yourself
Give yourself grace
Reward yourself when you’re ____ amount of days sober
Show yourself love,respect, and kindness
I miss you and hope you’re doing really good
Love,
You know who this is
I’m a dismissive avoidant in recovery
I’m neurodivergent (ADHD/autism,audio processing disorder)
I used to think addicts were low lifes
Then I met my ex
He was my best friend
He was incredibly kind,really good listener,very supportive, and creative
While he and I don’t talk right now,I still
love him. I still think he is a good person.
I have worked on myself since Fall ‘23
I have just started reading/listening to about addiction
It sounds like a really lonely (isolating) and intense thing to go through
I may not know a lot about it,I’ve listened to enough about it that I think we should think about what they are going through.
Everyone behaves a particular way for a reason
(are they hurt? are they upset?)
Let’s be thoughtful to one another
Be kind
Attachment: Be kind from Everything,Everywhere,All at Once