u/AccomplishedServe833

I am a Black woman who moved to Baltimore 3 years ago. I came from a predominantly white city but I lived in predominantly Black neighborhoods. I have been cat called before moving here, but it was definitely not an every day occurrence. I think that Baltimore is great and has a lot to offer. The main problem for me is that men here are extremely aggressive particularly the Black and Hispanic men. It has gotten to the point I have had to call the police. I have been followed because I refused to give them my number. I once had a guy circle around my house several times to stare at me as I was walking to my car. I have been cursed at because I didn’t speak to a man trying to talk to me from across the street while I was at the bus stop (I didn’t even know he was talking to me, considering I was not the only one at the stop). Yelled at as I am walking past. Even security guards in uniform AT WORK making comments. One said “ Damn shorty it’s going to be like that?”. All because I gave him a simple head nod to acknowledge his greeting. Another security guard once followed me out of the store to stare at me walking to my car because I gave him a head nod instead of stopping to talk. Mind you I’ve never seen them treat any of the male customers that walked past them like that. It gets grating to the point I don’t want to speak to any man who actually might be nice. I am trying not to be that way but I genuinely feel unsafe. It is an everyday occurrence.

It is this weird power trip where I as a woman need to open my mouth to speak to them. It’s not enough to just acknowledge them and keep pushing.

I work in customer service and I say hello to customers all day. Some acknowledge me and some don’t. I have never minded. People are busy and in their own world. My only job is to help them find what they need. After work, I don’t feel like talking. I just keep to myself. I am not rude in any way.

I talked to my uncle about it and he thinks that it’s because we as Black women are generally viewed as less protected. Not in the sense of just society, but in the sense of familial protection. Many people assume that we don’t have fathers or husbands or brothers or uncles who are in our lives and willing to protect us. So other men feel comfortable treating us that way because they don’t have any fear of repercussions from another man.

I'm just tired.

Hello all,

I am completely new to standup and just did my first set three weeks ago. However, I regularly attend local open mics.

There is one specific open-mic I go to where you see the same comics every week. I've noticed that most of them repeat the exact same set weekly with very little variation. While I realize the point of an open mic is to practice, I haven't noticed many of them tweak or adjust their material.

This got me thinking about my own process. Obviously, whether or not a joke lands could simply be because it’s not funny, the timing was off, or it was just the wrong audience to get the reference.

As a brand-new comic, how do I tell the difference? How do I know when a joke genuinely needs to be rewritten, versus when it just had a bad run?

I recently left my PhD program. It was a horrible experience… so bad to the point that the dean of the school had to issue me an apology after a 4 month investigation. Regardless I am the one left with the trauma of the situation and an apology does not change much. I regret ever joining that program, and now I am unsure if it is worth pursuing another PhD.

For some background, I am in my late twenties and I worked in industry for a few years after completing my undergraduate studies. When I felt ready I applied for a PhD and was accepted into three programs. I stupidly chose that program to get out of my home state so I packed my things and moved across the country and took a $40,000/year pay cut. My PhD experience was a nightmare... not just the program. The cost of living in this city was not something I could plan for, no matter how much research I did so the finances were also a constant stress.

I originally went for a PhD because I naively wanted my research to help people. In my experience the other researchers around me rarely thought about how their research impacted the patients. It just all felt very detached. It felt more like they were focused on their own personal gains rather than the overall impact of our work.

Since leaving the program I am considering whether it is worth going to another program. Out of all the doctoral specialties, PhDs generally get paid the least especially in life sciences. I now just want to live a comfortable life.

When I think about my other peers who either went straight to a PhD/JD/MD, they have now all graduated and are at least a year into their careers. Those who went straight into industry now have over five years of experience.

A PhD is a sacrifice in so many ways not only financially but it costs you time that you could be using to gain experience and climb the corporate ladder. Academia is very stagnant and honestly, I was shocked when I realized that at age 40 you are still considered “early career” in academia. Versus in spaces outside of life sciences you would be considered a seasoned professional.

If I did go back I feel like I would need to do a dual MD/ PhD or PharmD/PhD to make it worth it so I can ensure financial freedom.

Has anyone gone back for an in-person full-time STEM PhD in their 30s or 40s? How did you deal with it?

Edit: there seems to be some confusion on whether or not my motivation is money. That has never been my motivation going it grad school. My motivation is research. I love doing research. But grad school is a beast of its own. I am a realist and I need money to survive so yes the finances do factor in. I know that grad school is a give and take situation. At what point do the sacrifices outweigh the benefits (e.g, financial gain and CAREER GAIN). That is the point of this post.

I recently left my PhD program. It was a horrible experience… so bad to the point that the dean of the school had to issue me an apology after a 4 month investigation. Regardless I am the one left with the trauma of the situation and an apology does not change much. I regret ever joining that program, and now I am unsure if it is worth pursuing another PhD.

For some background, I am in my late twenties and I worked in industry for a few years after completing my undergraduate studies. When I felt ready I applied for a PhD and was accepted into three programs. I stupidly chose that program to get out of my home state so I packed my things and moved across the country and took a $40,000/year pay cut. My PhD experience was a nightmare... not just the program. The cost of living in this city was not something I could plan for, no matter how much research I did so the finances were also a constant stress.

I originally went for a PhD because I naively wanted my research to help people. In my experience the other researchers around me rarely thought about how their research impacted the patients. It just all felt very detached. It felt more like they were focused on their own personal gains rather than the overall impact of our work.

Since leaving the program I am considering whether it is worth going to another program. Out of all the doctoral specialties, PhDs generally get paid the least especially in life sciences. I now just want to live a comfortable life.

When I think about my other peers who either went straight to a PhD/JD/MD, they have now all graduated and are at least a year into their careers. Those who went straight into industry now have over five years of experience.

A PhD is a sacrifice in so many ways not only financially but it costs you time that you could be using to gain experience and climb the corporate ladder. Academia is very stagnant and honestly, I was shocked when I realized that at age 40 you are still considered “early career” in academia. Versus in spaces outside of life sciences you would be considered a seasoned professional.

If I did go back I feel like I would need to do a dual MD/ PhD or PharmD/PhD to make it worth it so I can ensure financial freedom.

Has anyone gone back for an in-person full-time STEM PhD in their 30s or 40s? How did you deal with it?

Edit: there seems to be some confusion on whether or not my motivation is money. That has never been my motivation going it grad school. My motivation is research. I love doing research. But grad school is a beast of its own. I am a realist and I need money to survive so yes the finances do factor in. I know that grad school is a give and take situation. At what point do the sacrifices outweigh the benefits (e.g, financial gain and CAREER GAIN). That is the point of this post.

I recently left my PhD program with my masters in neuroscience. The environment was not right for me and my supervisor and I truly did not get along. Because I left so abruptly I did not have time to look for jobs in advance. So I have been unemployed for the last eight months. I was able to get an interview with a top company and made it to the final round, but I didn’t get the position. My time in my PhD program was so traumatizing that I am seriously reconsidering whether or not I want to remain in the field. I thought my next step would be to apply for another program, but at this point, I’m not sure if it is worth it. I would like to pivot.

Regardless I’ve applied to 200 jobs in the biotech field and barely anything. I feel like my neuro masters is useless. Most of the jobs that I’m applying for require an advanced degree in immunology, chemistry, or molecular biology. I do have a B.S. in molecular biology. As well as three years of industry experience after undergrad. I was considering pivoting to patent law. But a lot of the life sciences patent positions require a PhD. Not sure what to do. I’m not sure if it’s worth going back for another masters in chemistry or immunology.

Additionally, I’m concerned about not having a letter of recommendation from my previous supervisor. I do have other mentors and my previous supervisor from industry around me who were willing to write me a letter, but they are not directly involved with my most recent research.

Has anyone pivoted from biotech and what did you do?

I now have a 4.2 star rating due a bad one/star review. Mind you I’m a new tasker. This client hired me the night before. Even though I have in my bio that I require 24 hours notice. I decided to take the job because I needed the money. I asked clarifying questions such “is there any heavy buildup that might require more time?” The only thing they mentioned was the stove top. I also asked the client when this needs to be done and they said that it needs to be done by 10 AM, only giving me 1 1/2 hour to clean. What they did not say was that this was for a move out. The house was covered in trash, food, and clothes. And she just sat out in her car the entire cleaning and instead helping to pick up her items off the floor so I could sweep the floor and mop. Additionally, the kitchen was heavily soiled, covered in spoiled food, grease, dirty dishes, and empty alcohol bottles. Quite frankly it was hazardous conditions. I think she thought I was going to help her pack all of her clothes and items. I have tried my best to weed out customers like this, but this is not the first time that I’ve had to deal with someone who was not truthful about the condition of their house. For experienced tasks, what are the questions that you ask to weed these people out? also, do you have any policies in place where you charge the client in full if they lie about the conditions of the house? (Mind you I am not shaming anyone for having a dirty house. But they need to be honest.)

I now have a 4.2 star rating due a bad one/star review. Mind you I’m a new tasker. This client hired me the night before. Even though I have in my bio that I require 24 hours notice. I decided to take the job because I needed the money. I asked clarifying questions such “is there any heavy buildup that might require more time?” The only thing they mentioned was the stove top. I also asked the client when this needs to be done and they said that it needs to be done by 10 AM, only giving me 1 1/2 hour to clean. What they did not say was that this was for a move out. The house was covered in trash and clothes. And she just sat out in her car the entire cleaning and instead helping to pick up her items off the floor so I could sweep the floor and mop. Additionally, the kitchen was heavily soiled, covered in spoiled food, grease, dirty dishes, and empty alcohol bottles. Quite frankly it was hazardous conditions. I think she thought I was going to help her pack all of her clothes and items. I have tried my best to weed out customers like this, but this is not the first time that I’ve had to deal with someone who was not truthful about the condition of their house. For experienced tasks, what are the questions that you ask to weed these people out? also, do you have any policies in place where you charge the client in full if they lie about the conditions of the house? (Mind you I am not shaming anyone for having a dirty house. But they need to be honest.)

P.S. I had a feeling that she would leave a bad review just based on the fact that she lied about the conditions of her house so I took pictures and I’m going to appeal the review and submit the pictures of evidence to taskrabbit. Hopefully they can at least ban her from the app. I mean the house was just really bad.