u/Additional_Carrot279

Hello everyone. I am 21 (F) and have been struggling with crazy intense OCD over plans, specifically relating to my relationship with my boyfriend.

To give some background:

We have been together since high school- we have been dating now for 5 years. We moved to Chicago together, then back to our hometown. We have had a lot of amazing experiences and adventures. I’ve always felt very secure in our relationship. I had a mental health crisis I have recovered from and he has been my rock.

That being said:

The past 6 months or so I have developed extreme thoughts over him making plans. Also, me making plans. I wake up in a near panic- especially when he mentions plans in the morning. I feel like he is not considering me, although that is untrue. It is to the point where there is not much either of us can do to help me calm down until it passes about an hour later. I have no idea what this is called or if other people have struggled with developing random anxieties like this? I just got diagnosed with OCD about a month ago and trying to figure it out still.

The thoughts sound like:

- what if he would rather hang out with them than me?
- does that mean he doesn’t like me?
- what if I am too tired later?
- what if I cancel and regret it?

Then I call him and make it exponentially worse because he never seems to “say the right thing”. Impossible I know. Then I will send him a series of texts and then unsend them all

Then I will ruminate about that. Etc…

Any help is appreciated.

I am 21 years old and recently, I have been having significant trouble with how much I drink- rather than the frequency. I will start with one beer at happy hour, which will delve into taking shots, which will end up with me on the floor. This doesn’t happen often- but offsets me when it does (probably once a week). I have switched medications lately and I am wondering if that has something to do with me losing control, as that never happened before. I will use last night as an example:

-I started by getting off work and grabbing a beer with my boyfriend at a local BBQ place
-we then grabbed shooters because I “wanted to get a bit drunk and have fun”
- I take 3 shooters in the span of 2 hours
- we go on a walk, super fun
- he says something that sets me off for some reason, and I walk home alone
- I get home and have a very intense panic attack- I’m sure being rude to him in the process
- I pass out and miss our friends coming over (he can’t even wake me up by shaking me)

I struggle with OCD and am just not sure how worried I should really be, if I’m overthinking it, or have a genuine problem. Any advice is appreciated.