u/Admirable_Method9916

i want to get into dating , and im scared if i dont enter now , it might be too late , but im not financially stable yet .
i earn enough for one person , but i wont be able to spend on my woman much, so should i be getting into dating?? , is financial instability a turn off for women? not looking for marriage btw , just casual dating .
i would love spending on my partner but im not in that place rn.

no matter how hard i work , i wont be able to clear any interviews ,because i just cant talk .
i dont feel like working at all ,bcuz i just know social anxiety will hold me back ,i wont reach anywhere good in my career.
if i dont do well in my career then whats the point of working hard.......
social anxiety will always hold me back so working hard feels meaningless.......

im antisocial , i hate talking to people , absolutely despise it and ive only ever heard that you get successful in my field of work only through connections and good networking.....

so for the past few months ive been telling myself that its useless for me to work hard bcuz no matter what i wont be successful bcuz of my antisocial behaviour.

this makes me not want to work hard and just sit around all day being lazy and not studying(im in college rn) . i keep giving myself the excuse that im antisocial , so its pointless for me to work hard bcuz im reaching nowhere without talking to ppl.

is there a way i can condition my mind to work hard even though i know i wont be successfull in any way?

i thought it was an issue with me that i wasnt energetic enough to live life , but nah i keep finding out so many men who just have 1-2 hobbies and are content and happy with a smaller social circle .

but ive always seen women doing activities and going out more and travelling wayyyyyy more and just doing activities and being social and participating and fun stuff more . why is this?

how come they have more energy than us , i wanna be like them

i have tried to do stuff outside and i dont enjoy anything at all , it always just feels stressful.
the reason i post this here is because genz is the generation that is in the 20s and i assume everyone loves being outside , but what is that yall enjoy about being outside????

being at home is so enjoyable and relaxing , i could be at home for a month straight without stepping out easily .

its annoying because everyone likes to go out around my age(20) , but i simply hate it , it feels like im doing something wrong even though im so happyyy

i just dont understand AT ALL how friendships are supposed to work.... , i feel like i put in too much effort at the start by talking more and trying hard to make jokes and what not and i end up making many friends , but as i get more comfortable with them , i see that i fall back into my extreme introverted roots ,i seem to stop talking all together , i dont talk AT ALL , i dont feel like it , ever.|

When i get comfortable , i ignore all my friends , kind of like ghost them , bcuz its so mentally exhausting to talk to them again , or anyone at all . but at the end of the day i still end up feeling lonely , but i also die inside at the thought of conversation.

even the good friends that i made back in school days , they tried to reach and contact me , but i just ignored them , they are such good ppl but idk why , it feels like too much pressure....

it sucks cause my natural state is to not talk to anyone at all , but i also end up feeling lonely at the end of the day . does anyone relate to this at all ? how do yall genuinely manage friendships? it used to be something so easy as a kid , but now so insanely difficult for me as a dude in his 20s.....

idk whats wrong with me , but i just cant view posting on insta as a normal thing ,the fake smiles , the poses and the showoff nature of the posts.

i cant even view them as sharing something with your friends , everything feels like they are trying to rub it in my face that they had an awesome weekend. taking pics for insta feels weird...

how do i fix this mentality , its wrong to think this way , i want to post on insta too but it just feels wrong ,i dont want it to feel wrong , i want to post on insta bcuz everyone is posting on insta my age and i just feel left out......

does anybody think this way ? how do i stop thinking like this ?how do i stop overanalyzing things and just let things be and enjoy..... :(