u/Alienshe88

My baby has never latched on to my left hand side and she caused nipple trauma on the first latch to my right. In the ward we then were encouraged to supplement with formula and I was told my baby did not have a tongue tie.

I started pumping and fed my baby about 90% breast milk, 10% formula for the first few months. We later found out my baby had a posterior tongue tie and a high palate. The tie was divided and her tongue movement is better and she will latch, but her sucking motion is poor and she struggles to transfer milk.

I hired an IBCLC who was helpful, and we would nurse in the morning, although this was more of a bonding exercise as I would still have to pump after.

My cesarean incision has reopened again, at 3.5 months. I think it is not healing properly under the flap, and I am struggling to lose weight, which I think might be partially related to BF hormones.

I am feeling very done with pumping, but also very guilty with the idea of moving to fully formula feeding. I am not able to keep my supply up with what my baby drinks per day now, and honestly pumping makes me feel trapped and depressed. Even with properly fitted flanges, I hate the sensation of pumping, and I hate the constant pump washing.

But when I mention formula to any lactation consultants / feeding advisors, they literally look disgusted and horrified, and I am struggling not to judge myself for wanting to give up only 3.5 months in.

I had wanted to breastfeed for the first two years, but triple feeding for 3.5 months is literally draining the life out of me. Any advice is welcome.

EDIT - I forgot to say, I think my baby is starting to teeth now, and she bites my nipples with her gums, which is adding to the frustration.

I posted here 25 days ago about how my baby won’t latch. For background - I had my baby via planned cesarean at 39 weeks. In the recovery room, the midwives supported her to latch but after an hour of her on my nipple it was totally SHREDDED. I kept trying to latch her despite the pain until the midwives advised me to rest my nipple. However, she wouldn’t latch on the left side at all. I ended up hand expressing colostrum and feeding her this on my finger. Between the nipple bleeding and bruising and overzealous hand expressing, my poor boobs were bruised and sore. the nurses advised supplementing with formula (they kept describing her as “too fractious to latch”) and she has quickly developed a bottle preference.

Since then, I have had a couple of feeds and ONE good day where she randomly decided to latch on my nipple SIX times. But other than that, she still won’t latch. I tried a nipple shield on my left breast; which she has never latched on before, and she did feed but it very much felt like a shallow latch and more nipple feeding than breastfeeding and I can’t seem to get her to latch any deeper.

My period started yesterday and for the first time since birth I can feel my hormones going haywire. I’ve been pumping, but I quite frankly cannot keep up with pumping every three hours. I feel like a dairy cow chained to the sofa and it makes me miserable and I feel stressed at the thought of it. Plus; alongside feeding baby, it’s literally all I am able to do, a continuous cycle of feeding, washing, pumping, feeding, washing, pumping. I can barely leave the house before it’s time for the next pump. The midwives and health visitor and feeding clinic have discouraged the use of hands free or portable pumps stating that they don’t empty your breasts properly but I feel like I’m losing my mind now. Am I just not supposed to leave the house for the next year for more than 2.5 hours at a time? I don’t even know how to care for my baby whilst she screams when I’m trying to pump at the same time.

We are still waiting for our ENT clinic appointment to see if she has a tongue tie but the HV said she is only borderline on assessment. Baby screams bloody murder and becomes distressed when trying to latch her. I swear sometimes I hear her little bones clicking when I try to move her in to a BF position but they just keep telling me to keep trying.

I googled that my period returning is a sign that my prolactin levels aren’t high? Will my milk dry up? Is it normal to feel completely insane with your first period after pregnancy? The only person I want to be with is my baby and want to scream at everyone else.

The HV keeps saying “breast is best” as though I don’t already know that and don’t desperately want to breastfeed my child. But I don’t think I can keep pumping much longer, it makes me feel miserable and trapped. I don’t understand why she would latch for one day and not want to again. The feeding clinic said they would make a referral for more support for me but I haven’t heard anything.

Rant over.

Just curious how everyone is managing at this time!

Im a FTM and baby is five weeks old. Time has lost all meaning. I don’t know what day it is half the time and am running on anywhere between 2.5-5 hours of sleep a day. I spend nights in the living room with baby whilst my partner sleeps, before they take over in the morning. I seem to have a very sleepy baby, but she mostly only wants to contact nap. I tried to put her in her crib SIX times last night, and she only settled once, sleeping for a total of 1.5-hours. I got one hour of sleep overnight after listening to her flap her legs about until I pick her up again and she falls soundly asleep in my arms immediately 🫠 [We have a bedside crib and baby is struggling to latch, so not EBF so not prepared to try co-sleeping yet. We don’t have any family nearby to help out].

Aside from the cuddles, I’ve been entertaining myself watching movies and Im considering setting myself a weekly “theme” (ie., cult classics, art documentaries etc) to help pass the time when baby is snoozing on me. I keep thinking about reading books but I’m worried that will make me tired.

I haven’t got a carrier yet, but thinking I might as well spend some of the night doing chores or food prep when we have one, as the house is an absolute bomb site 😂

Just wondering how others are managing this sweet & sticky time warp. Do you have any kind of routine yet?

Had almost finished a can of goodrays electrolyte drink when I realised it has lions mane in it, which is not recommended when breastfeeding 🫠🫠🫠
It has 250mg per can - will I need to pump and dump or will this small amount be okay? Baby is struggling to latch, so I am mostly pumping, and is only 19-days old, which is why I’m worried.

Thank you!!

Had almost finished a can of goodrays electrolyte drink when I realised it has lions mane in it, which is not recommended when breastfeeding 🫠🫠🫠
It has 250mg per can - will I need to pump and dump or will this small amount be okay? Baby is struggling to latch, so I am mostly pumping, and is only 19-days old, which is why I’m worried.

Thank you!!

I posted in the US subreddit earlier in the week and am really glad I found this one. I am basically just looking for a little bit of reassurance / experiences from others that babies can learn to latch later on??

I had my baby via planned cesarean at 39 weeks. In the recovery room, the midwives supported her to latch to my breast, but between not knowing what a good latch and a bad latch feels like and generally being dazed and in love with this little human, after an hour of her on my nipple it was totally SHREDDED. I kept trying to latch her despite the pain until the midwives advised me to rest my nipple. However, she wouldn’t latch on the left side at all. I ended up hand expressing colostrum and feeding her this on my finger, which she loved. Between the nipple bleeding and bruising and overzealous hand expressing, my poor boobs were bruised and sore. the nurses advised supplementing with formula (they kept describing her as “too fractious to latch”) and she has quickly developed a bottle preference. She has maybe latched on my right nipple three times since and appears to have no interest in my breasts and just starts to cry when we try.

I’ve basically been naked for the last 15 days doing skin to skin with her. She has only rooted once on my breast but quickly gives up. We ordered hospital grade pump to combo-feed alongside formula. She’s had her tongue checked and doesn’t seem to have a tongue tie, she actually seems to have a really strong latch but just won’t take my nipple at all. She will literally try to latch ON TO MY NOSE or my (male) partners nipple, but she becomes distressed on my boobs :(

My next plan is to try nipple shields. I was hoping pumping would bring in my supply enough to keep her interested (I can get between 80ml and 150ml per pump atm) but it doesn’t seem to have worked.

I guess I’m just looking for reassurance that some babies might suddenly decide they want to latch when they are a bit older? I feel like with pumping I’m going to be tied in to an exhausting schedule of pumping and cleaning. I got told that the rugby hold might be best for my breasts as they are on the larger side, but it feels very awkward and not natural to me. Cross cradle feels more natural. Just don’t want to feel this disheartened already.

Thank you!!

Hi everyone, I have just found this community and it is really helpful. I guess the answers are already here, but just looking for reassurance that babies can learn to latch later on??

I had my baby via planned cesarean at 39 weeks. In the recovery room, the midwives supported her to latch to my breast, but between not knowing what a good latch and a bad latch feels like and generally being dazed and in love with this little human, after an hour of her on my nipple it was totally SHREDDED. I kept trying to latch her despite the pain until the midwives advised me to rest my nipple. However, she wouldn’t latch on the left side at all. I ended up hand expressing colostrum and feeding her this on my finger, which she loved. Between the nipple bleeding and bruising and overzealous hand expressing, my poor boobs were bruised and sore. the nurses advised supplementing with formula (they kept describing her as “too fractious to latch”) and she has quickly developed a bottle preference. She has maybe latched on my right nipple three times since and appears to have no interest in my breasts and just starts to cry when we try.

I’ve basically been naked for the last 12 days doing skin to skin with her. She has only rooted once on my breast but quickly gives up. We ordered hospital grade pump to combo-feed alongside formula. She’s had her tongue checked and doesn’t have a tongue tie, she actually seems to have a really strong latch but just won’t take my nipple at all.

My next plan is to try nipple shields. I was hoping pumping would bring in my supply enough to keep her interested (I can get between 80ml and 145ml per pump atm) but it doesn’t seem to have worked.

I guess I’m just looking for reassurance that some babies might suddenly decide they want to latch when they are a bit older? I feel like with pumping I’m going to be tied in to an exhausting schedule of pumping and cleaning. I got told that the rugby hold might be best for my breasts as they are on the larger side, but it feels very awkward and not natural to me. Just don’t want to feel this disheartened already.

Thank you!!

I will be 39-weeks tomorrow and, just a couple of days ago, I received a phone call with the offer to move my elective up by three days. I jumped at the chance, as I have found pregnancy incredibly difficult (anxiety, OCD, PGP and exhaustion throughout). Over the past few weeks I’ve been in and out of triage with incredibly painful contractions and episodes of reduced movement and I feel absolutely huge - baby and bump are both 97th percentile. I am not coping well in this heat! I can’t catch a breath, I’m constantly falling asleep, everything hurts and my feet are swollen.

But I cannot for the life of me imagine a baby is going to come out of me tomorrow? I think
I’ve spent a lot of pregnancy dissociated from the fact I’ll have a baby because I’ve been so worried about losing her. But now there is going to be a baby. TOMORROW?

Is there anything I should be doing with my last evening?! I’ve just had my bloods taken and the only advice I’ve had is about fasting and omeprazole. Didn’t have a chance to attend the prep class due to the date being brought forward. I thought I might have to “scrub” or something in preparation, but they just said nope, have a normal shower and turn up.

Any advice or reassurance would be appreciated!!! My bag is packed but is there anything that I should add? Thank you!

Hi everyone!

I hope this is okay to post here - just looking for some advice from other women who have struggled with hormonal contraception in the past.

I’m currently a month away from my due date and the doctors have been asking me what I want to do about birth control after baby arrives. I am having a planned caesarean, and they offered to fit a coil during the procedure, but I am really not keen on having something that I cannot stop myself if I have a bad reaction.

I have only taken hormonal birth control for about a year over 18-years ago (Microgynon) and I HATED IT - I gained loads of weight and cried all of the time. Since then I have relied on condoms, or with my current partner, FAM. I’m not going to risk it after baby (one and DONE), but I didn’t have any pregnancy scares until we actively started trying, when I got pregnant on my first (MMC) and fourth cycles. Despite this, the doctors have told me YOU WILL GET PREGNANT if we don’t use contraception. We have condoms ready.

However, the thing that is making me reconsider birth control is that I was sure I was having perimenopause symptoms (I’m 37), alongside daily vestibular migraine symptoms (which have disappeared in pregnancy) prior to conceiving. I am unable to take certain types of hormones due to ocular migraine risks, so the doctors have suggested progesterone-only pills. But is progesterone partly why I have been feeling absolutely wiped out during pregnancy? I’ve had insane fatigue the entire 8-months and can’t imagine feeling this way on top of caring for a baby.

Has anyone been in a similar situation? Did migraine and/or perimenopause symptoms return quickly for you after birth?

Any help would be very much appreciated!!

Not looking for medical advice, just wondering what has helped others in similar circumstances. I know to call triage.

34+1 and I ended up in maternity assessment earlier this week as I was worried about not being able to feel my baby move as much. Turns out, she was absolutely fine in there, but had turned to face my back, where I couldn’t feel what she was doing. placenta, amniotic fluid level and her heart rate were all great on monitoring and ultrasound. Then she turned back and now I can feel EVERYTHING again.

Everything, to the point, that I am exhausted! Baby girl is moving constantly. My whole belly will shift and ripple about. Yesterday, I started getting stomach cramps. I wondered if it was the iron tablets I’ve been prescribed, but then it started to feel more like period cramps. All day. I took paracetamol, had a warm bath and a nap, but woke up and they were still there.

I woke again this morning to the same thing - it is mildly painful and “jolts” when she kicks me. It’s like she is jiggling her way through the cramping. Does this sound like irritable uterus? They don’t feel like timetable contractions and there is no pattern.

I will call triage back if it doesn’t pass, but I feel like I live there at the moment and everytime I go get checked, I’m fine. No concerns about my urine or BP. No signs of infection. Haven’t passed my mucus plug, no bleeding, no waters. Just bloody uncomfortable and my belly feels stretched and sore and like it’s going to pop.

I’m booked in for a planned section, but I honestly can’t see myself making it another 5-weeks? Baby girl has 90th centile legs so I’m just wondering if everything is getting cramped and stretched?

Going to drink a litre of water and see if that helps. Does this sound like an irritable uterus?