u/BasicArt5383

So I'm 21 rn and through all of high school and before ofc I never picked a career. Like I scrolled through options, watched day in the life of x career, and while some seemed interesting I could never actually commit or feel passionate about any of them. My entire school life was spent taking every art class offered, and a bunch of other random classes that just sounded interesting. same with extracurriculars too I just tried whatever seemed interesting at the time.

I have a couple of older cousins who right after graduating went to college and though they changed their minds about what they wanted a couple times have jobs and live independently now. By the time I graduated I felt like the only person around who didn't have a single plan for after high school, I felt like college was pointless unless I had a real reason to go, and the stress of having to choose a major and everything didn't help. So I didn't, I spent the first year out of high school, going to europe, volunteering at the animal shelter, and tried a part time job at a store that didn't go well.

I've never been able to like hit the milestones others do, I graduated without a drivers license, i'd never had a job before because school itself was already difficult enough, etc. I forced myself to get my license at 19 because I was so sick of being made fun of for not having it. I got that job too because I was so sick of being made fun of for not having one.

When my older cousin graduated college I felt so jealous and lost, and I wanted people to be proud of me the same way they were her. After I quit the job I had after a month because it caused me to have a panic attack, partly from being treated horribly, I went back to being made fun of again. People always said I was doing so well before and I could tell they were dissapointed in me. I didn't know why all of that stuff was so hard and no one else cared.

I felt determined to prove myself, and find a way to make them proud. So I relied on the only form of success I knew, school. I always got really good grades and was acknowledged for it, My struggles in school were about being completely drained by the time lunch rolled around, and needing alone time to recover for hours.

So despite the fact that I failed so bad I had to go back to regular school the time I tried homeschool in middle school, I decided to go to online college, mostly because I was already 20 and felt way to old to even think about going to college in person.

Anyway so I decided to apply for a school online, I ended up choosing to get a bachelors in english and creative writing, because I love reading and I like writing sometimes but don't consider myself very good at it. Everyone knew that about me and so it sort of felt expected in a way but it was also because I liked it and felt it would give me lots of options later so I wouldn't be stuck in a career I hated.

Then I decided to apply to this college program far away from home just because ig, so I applied, got in, and moved across the country for 3 months for it. It basically involved working retail while I also got to try other stuff, like auditioning and their options for professional internships later basically. That didn't go well either and a month in just like last time I had a panic attack though without the same awful treatment, though i still wasn't treated great.

I felt so discouraged, and along with just not feeling as confident in my degree choice as before I decided to switch majors to environmental science, really just because the program had an envi sci professional internship option. But i regretted switching from the second I did it honestly, and while I wanted to switch back to english I just didn't feel like i'd be able to actually get a career other than a teacher, which I don't know if I'd want.

I also didn't think I'd be able to get a real career in envi sci if I didn't get into that internship. After leaving the program though I felt even more discouraged by my choice, especially because I am still taking english classes that I absolutely love, I'm just not sure if i love them as a hobby or as a potential career.

So because I wanted to pick something I thought might actually lead to a good career while leaving options open for later, I started looking into the health science degree option at my school.

Though I also started therapy and several pro's have strongly hinted at me being autistic which could explain a lot of what i've struggled with and why. I was even told I qualify for an esa, though because of the whole job situation I'm not able to get one.

That also motivated me to find a career that would let me be able to do that. With my brother about to graduate high school and go right into college I also felt even more like time's running out, and I want to graduate the time I would've if I had went at 18, My school lets you have the option to take extra classes that let you graduate a lot sooner, and I could get up to 60% of the way through a health science degree alot sooner if I switch. What I'd probably do with it is try to become a sonographer or something cause I have thought about it before and I think it'd be cool.

I just don't know what I want, or if i'm capable of handling everything like everyone else can, I just don't know what to do, I want to do nothing while also wanting to do everything, like theres tons of stuff I know I just can't do or don't want to do, but theres also a lot I would find cool.

I just wish I was like everyone else, everyone else just knows what they like and what they want to do forever, my therapist even said i'm not ready for a big decision like the major switch extra classes thing, which made me even more determined to do it because that made me feel even more incapable.

I don't know if i'd be going into something I like or can even handle, and I feel like i'm always running out of time and won't be able to do anything. Do you have any advice about what I should do for my major, and school in general?

TL;DR: is changing my major again along with taking extra classes to graduate on time worth it, or am I not doing it for the right reason?

So I'm 21 rn and through all of high school and before ofc I never picked a career. Like I scrolled through options, watched day in the life of x career, and while some seemed interesting I could never actually commit or feel passionate about any of them. My entire school life was spent taking every art class offered, and a bunch of other random classes that just sounded interesting. same with extracurriculars too I just tried whatever seemed interesting at the time.

I have a couple of older cousins who right after graduating went to college and though they changed their minds about what they wanted a couple times have jobs and live independently now. By the time I graduated I felt like the only person around who didn't have a single plan for after high school, I felt like college was pointless unless I had a real reason to go, and the stress of having to choose a major and everything didn't help. So I didn't, I spent the first year out of high school, going to europe, volunteering at the animal shelter, and tried a part time job at a store that didn't go well.

I've never been able to like hit the milestones others do, I graduated without a drivers license, i'd never had a job before because school itself was already difficult enough, etc. I forced myself to get my license at 19 because I was so sick of being made fun of for not having it. I got that job too because I was so sick of being made fun of for not having one.

When my older cousin graduated college I felt so jealous and lost, and I wanted people to be proud of me the same way they were her. After I quit the job I had after a month because it caused me to have a panic attack, partly from being treated horribly, I went back to being made fun of again. People always said I was doing so well before and I could tell they were dissapointed in me. I didn't know why all of that stuff was so hard and no one else cared.

I felt determined to prove myself, and find a way to make them proud. So I relied on the only form of success I knew, school. I always got really good grades and was acknowledged for it, My struggles in school were about being completely drained by the time lunch rolled around, and needing alone time to recover for hours.

So despite the fact that I failed so bad I had to go back to regular school the time I tried homeschool in middle school, I decided to go to online college, mostly because I was already 20 and felt way to old to even think about going to college in person.

Anyway so I decided to apply for a school online, I ended up choosing to get a bachelors in english and creative writing, because I love reading and I like writing sometimes but don't consider myself very good at it. Everyone knew that about me and so it sort of felt expected in a way but it was also because I liked it and felt it would give me lots of options later so I wouldn't be stuck in a career I hated.

Then I decided to apply to this college program far away from home just because ig, so I applied, got in, and moved across the country for 3 months for it. It basically involved working retail while I also got to try other stuff, like auditioning and their options for professional internships later basically. That didn't go well either and a month in just like last time I had a panic attack though without the same awful treatment, though i still wasn't treated great.

I felt so discouraged, and along with just not feeling as confident in my degree choice as before I decided to switch majors to environmental science, really just because the program had an envi sci professional internship option. But i regretted switching from the second I did it honestly, and while I wanted to switch back to english I just didn't feel like i'd be able to actually get a career other than a teacher, which I don't know if I'd want.

I also didn't think I'd be able to get a real career in envi sci if I didn't get into that internship. After leaving the program though I felt even more discouraged by my choice, especially because I am still taking english classes that I absolutely love, I'm just not sure if i love them as a hobby or as a potential career.

So because I wanted to pick something I thought might actually lead to a good career while leaving options open for later, I started looking into the health science degree option at my school.

Though I also started therapy and several pro's have strongly hinted at me being autistic which could explain a lot of what i've struggled with and why. I was even told I qualify for an esa, though because of the whole job situation I'm not able to get one.

That also motivated me to find a career that would let me be able to do that. With my brother about to graduate high school and go right into college I also felt even more like time's running out, and I want to graduate the time I would've if I had went at 18, My school lets you have the option to take extra classes that let you graduate a lot sooner, and I could get up to 60% of the way through a health science degree alot sooner if I switch. What I'd probably do with it is try to become a sonographer or something cause I have thought about it before and I think it'd be cool.

I just don't know what I want, or if i'm capable of handling everything like everyone else can, I just don't know what to do, I want to do nothing while also wanting to do everything, like theres tons of stuff I know I just can't do or don't want to do, but theres also a lot I would find cool.

I just wish I was like everyone else, everyone else just knows what they like and what they want to do forever, my therapist even said i'm not ready for a big decision like the major switch extra classes thing, which made me even more determined to do it because that made me feel even more incapable.

I don't know if i'd be going into something I like or can even handle, and I feel like i'm always running out of time and won't be able to do anything. Do you have any advice about what I should do for my major, and school in general?

You lack a certain subtly
You had something to tell me
I knew Immediately

Do I wanna be your apple spice
Something sweet and something nice
Something sour in the way you like

Pretty little birdies in the window
Fading through the curtain like a ghost.

We pass in the hallway 
Your eyes light up 
Sitting side by side
Like were a rom com

This whirlwinds gonna 
Knock the house right down

Hands brushed under the blanket
On movie night before you ask to move in
Apartment shopping, diamond rings, bassinets

I’m in a whirlwind 
Can’t touch the ground
You talk about forever
And my heart pounds

You had my name blown up in lights
Then missed the sign as you walked by
Tore it down as you said goodbye

You planned for forever
But meant never
Guess the whirlwind 
Couldn’t be eternal
 
Questions left in the rubble
What might have been
Without the trouble

I’ll never know the answer
But i’ll be
Wondering how you are in the moonlight

Basically I'll have times where my mood is super low for a few days or whatever, and then i'll start eating lots of carbs and sugar, sometimes caffiene, I'll impulse shop, i'll start planning my entire life in 1 day and start like applying to stuff or considering like 5 different things to apply for.

It's the reason i'm in college for English, the reason I applied for a college program I left last month, the reason I changed majors to environmental science, the reason I now want to change majors again back to english, and the reason I spent money to take extra classes on the side in a completely unrelated path(medicine), Also the reason I'll consider applying to different certifications(started sub teaching application, and IT certificate), or extracurriculars and stuff. It's so hard and I need it to stop because It's probably not gonna end well for me but I have no idea how to not do that.

I barely even know why I do it other than as a response to the low mood or whatever, I was actually given an antidepressant med but because I absolutely hate phone calls I haven't refilled it, so I have no idea if it will help whenever I eventually get around to it, hopefully soon but I just can't I hate phone calls so much.

I have no idea what I want to do with my life, I kind of want to do everything, I hate being chained down to one option forever. I also want to graduate early, and graduate with high honor and be in the honor society, which I mean will take a lot of work in my classes plus the extra ones I'm taking now.

I don't know there's so much I want to do, I feel like i'm running out of time and will never be able to do stuff if I don't do it all now. I'm already 21, I feel like the clocks ticking so fast. I sort of have since forever. Even as a kid I would join stuff on a whim but it feels way more damaging when it's such big life decisions being made all in one day.

I genuinly don't know what to do so if anyone has any advice about what to do college wise and just in general about all of this I'd appreciate it alot, it's really alot.

So Basically there was a guy(23M) who asked me(21F) out, and I knew for a while that he had a crush on me and could tell instantly the day he was gonna ask. Even though I'd been asked before once by someone else and had no issue saying no, this time was different. For some reason I genuinely considered saying yes, and my family encouraged it.

So I said yes, so we had lunch together a couple of times, I showed him a Tv show I loved, that kind of thing. Anyway things moved very quickly after that, He started talking about moving in together and marriage and kids, and it had only been like 2 days, it felt like being in a disney movie. It was so stressful.

He also told me that he was keeping our relationship secret from his family because they wouldn't approve(absolutely no offense is meant, but his family is mormon for context and I'm not). I guess the stress got to him too much or something because on day 3 he broke up with me.

We stayed in touch for a couple of months after that but lost touch eventually, neither of us ever reached out to each other again after. Until a couple years later when I suddenly get a facebook message from him saying he's ready to get back together(not kidding that's how he said it).

At this point I have already been questioning my sexuality for a while and discovered I'm very likely AroAce. Anyway I said no and he seemed hurt by that. I felt really bad because It's not like he's a bad person he's actually pretty sweet. I'm not sure if I should've given it another chance, if I should have just said yes but lets go slow, I have no idea if I really liked him, and now I feel like the entire relationship I was just leading him on, or maybe I just needed things to go slower, I have no idea, but I haven't spoken to him since and I think I could be in the wrong for how things went.

Originally when applying for colleges my major was English with a focus in creative writing, and an Art History Minor. I basically chose it out of interest in those topics and nothing else. I then thought it would be cool to do something important, like environmental work, so my plan was to keep my english degree and then do a masters in environmental science and law and basically become an environmental lawyer or something, maybe even join the peace corps someday.

A couple months ago though I decided to switch my major to environmental science but keep creative writing as my minor, partly for the sake of ease. I do genuinely love science too. I haven't actually taken any science classes yet, i'm still doing prereq's and english classes, but i'm already regretting my decision, especially since my current classes are Film History and a Literature class and I love both of them so much. I even got to do screenwriting in my creative writing class and loved it. Genuinely my current classes make me feel so passionate and excited.

I just genuinely have no idea if I should reverse my decision and go back to english and art history or if I should go with environmental science for maybe better career opportunities. So genuinly what should I do?

So I (21) recently moved in with my mom and 2 sisters. I've always been a very picky eater, and am picky about other stuff too. Me and my mom get into sort of arguments about me waking her up because of my shower schedule and being a night owl, about me being extremely picky about water, and about my food preferences.

Anyway she's on a super tight budget because she's in between jobs right now, and I already convinced her to buy 2 boxes of a food because I eat the same thing everyday. Anyway so my 8yr old sister has Celiac Disease and so mom always makes gluten free meals. She made spaghetti and garlic bread for dinner and I didn't enjoy it because of how thick the noodles were.

She essentially got mad at me for being so picky and said I had to finish it all. She just bought a different food that I wanted so I asked for that and she said no, but said I could have that food if I ate all of the food she made. I eventually was able to finish it and got the food I actually wanted but yeah.

I just wonder AITAH because of how picky I am and for not wanting the food she made because of the tight budget she has right now and the strain ig my pickiness is putting on her?

So I (21F) just moved fully into my mom and sister's house. I was raised by my grandparents, moved away on my own, and have now moved in with them.) I've always been really close to the older of my 2 sisters (13 and 8). At least I thought so.

Anyway, we always had sleepovers and movie nights, danced together, and she would tell me stuff, you know. As we could talk for hours about everything and always made eachother laugh. But after they moved away to a different state, things changed. We barely even texted eachother.

When she came out as lesbian, I sent her a pride flag emoji, hoping it'd show my support, especially since I knew the rest of our family wouldn't support her at all. I don't know if that was the response she wanted, though.

Almost 2 years after the move, I visited, and my sister told me that she vapes. I also found out she used money from our grandparents to buy it. I then heard what I thought was her sharing that vape with our younger sister. So I confronted her, and she denied it and told me to back off, basically.

I think I heard her crying that night, and I felt so bad because I love her and I know she's only doing it cause she's hurting. Since moving in, I found out some kids at school were saying things about her, and it, of course, made her really upset. I wanted to ask her about it and wanted her to tell me about it, but that never happened, and I have no idea how to talk to her about it or let her know I care and will try my best to be supportive or help or whatever she needs.

All I've been able to do is ask her how school was and have small conversations with her, but nothing like it used to be. I know she hated moving and wished they never did. She did agree to go to a concert with me this summer, but yeah. I just need any advice on what to do to make things better or fix our relationship.