u/Busy-Door6682

There's no solution to being a short guy. You can get surgery if you want, but it's expensive, painful, and there's issues of limb proportionality afterwards. You can try and make up for it by being buff and rich but people will just mock you for overcompensating. You have to go above and beyond to present yourself as the perfect guy just to get an inkling of the affection and intimacy that your average tall guy gets.

The worst part is the women who make fun of short men are primarily referring to guys that are 5'7 to 5'9. If you fall below that, you aren't even perceived as a man. You see it all the time on here where a short guy vents about loneliness, someone tries to cheer them up, and then the OP reveals that he's like 5'3 or something. And everyone else just kind of goes silent, because they were under the impression that "short" here was referring to 5'8.

It's also crazy how rare it is to actually find a woman who genuinely likes short guys. I feel like there's so many fetishes out there for so many different kinds of people, but short guys only get appreciated by gay dudes. Some women don't "mind" short guys, but that usually doesn't mean anything cause they still overwhelmingly prefer tall men. So really what you're left with is women who exclusively date tall guys, women who date guys taller than them, and then women who don't mind height but still usually date tall guys. I've seen more women into scat than short men. Sobering, isn't it? I know it was for me. Even if a woman actually likes short guys, she still gets shit for it from her friends and family. I've seen woman dump their short bfs cause the mockery became too much. Brutal.

I don't hate or resent women for their preferences. If I was a woman, I'd like tall guys too. I mean, why would I wanna settle for a mediocre short guy who I'll never feel feminine around over a proper tall masculine guy who makes me feel safe and comfortable? It makes perfect sense. This isn't anyones fault. It's not society's fault, it's not women's fault, it's not men's fault. It's just a fact of life. It is what it is. The world can't all be winners. Some of us were meant to lose.

I tried posting on kitchencels but it got removed so I hope this fits. I was overweight and quite a nerdy introvert, didn't have much social skills and barely any life skills. When I finished school I became a NEET, barely left my room, played video games all day, went down the red pill, the whole nine yards, did it for a few years, back then incel wasn't really a thing yet but looking back that's what I'd get called if I did it today.

Eventually with support and encouragement from my mom I tried to break out of it, I started working, studying, reflecting, changing my attitudes towards women and life, learning life skills (cooking, cleaning, how to drive etc). I started paying my way and tried my best not to burden my mom anymore (honestly the biggest regret I ever had about being a NEET, the delays to my own life and whatever else I can live with, because being a NEET sucks in some ways but it's also really awesome.).

Anyway, fast forward 6 really hard years, I grew as a person, emotionally, psychologically, philosophically, figuratively and physically, lost 90lbs, became quite a good cook (i get lots of compliments on it from friends of both genders), got a well paid career, started enjoying more hobbies, made good friends and felt like I'd caught up on life except for romance, still no luck. But more than anything, I was really happy and content with the life I had built for myself, I just wanted a partner to share that with, not because I was desperate to be with someone but because I felt my cup was overflowing and I wanted to share it.

I developed a crush on a good friend (I know, typical incel), but it was mutual and we both already knew each other well and knew we had similar outlooks and life goals aligned well since we'd been friends for awhile.

Now almost six months in of official girlfriend, it's been a rollercoaster of emotions some very happy moments like falling in love, losing all of my firsts, finally having someone to hold and a partner to share life with and yet I'm the unhappiest I've been in years. She's completely different to how she was as a friend, I feel like I'm being emotionally, financially and physchologically abused that's only gotten noticeable / worse as it goes on. She regularly insults me, talks down to me, has isolated me from my friends and hobbies, didn't trust me and thinks I'm gonna cheat on her and has gone through my phone looking for infidelity of which obviously I didn't and wouldn't ever do (your my first ever partner like what, where was all of these other possible people), has these extreme emotional reactions to even minor events that make her both withdraw (silent treatment) and also insult me/ blame me for something I often never would have thought of. is constantly demanding an endless stream of gifts, holidays and other things (she was caught speeding by a camera and had a meltdown when I didn't offer to pay for it or claim that I was driving to take the demerit points for her).

I just feel like why did I even spend those tough years coming out of my room and growing, was this all I was worth anyway?

Not to make it all sound negative, she has been good in a number of ways, didn't judge me much on my lack of previous romance and has never thrown my feelings back in my face even when I've cried and been vulnerable.

It's ironic but literally as I was typing this out, she called me, angry that I'd only messaged her three times today (at this point it was almost 2pm) and asked me to buy her a gift card to a store she likes. Her favourite phrases include: bare minimum, if you wanted to you would, if you loved me you would, you don't love me enough, you never put any effort in (meanwhile I carry our relationship, I plan all the dates, events, gifts, communications and conflict resolutions) One of the messages was me saying when I'd call, tried to call her a few times across a 20 minute period during a small break I had today (she didn't pick up but called me a little bit later when I had to go back to what I was doing but I still tried to make time for her and wish her a nice day, I said I didn't have time to go buy the gift card but we can talk about it later, she hung up and messaged me "forget it").

I feel like typing this, I know that I need to end it but even so I'm just feeling quite down about it. I don't want to think all women suck but this isn't even that different to a lot of the relationships I've seen other guys have, men getting treated like ATMs seems pretty common.

TLDR Stay an incel, it's a lot safer, the world sucks and the world will remember that you're worth nothing. Beef birria toastie.