u/Clear_Background_151

Hi, I’m a sex-repulsed asexual looking for friends and maybe something more down the line. I don’t want children and I don’t smoke, drink, or do drugs for health reasons.

A little bit about me: I’m an artist in more ways than one. I like to draw (mainly pencil sketching), scrapbook, and take photographs with my camera. I try to go hiking every weekend so I can exercise while working on my photography skills. I enjoy traveling, but don’t get to do it often because I have no vacation time :,)

Some of my other hobbies are listening to music (Built to Spill, Radiohead, Pennywise, Bad Religion, Pool Kids, Green Day, Nirvana) and playing video games (Legend of Zelda, Minecraft, Omori, Terraria, Stardew Valley).

Fun facts about me:
- Most of my clothes are thrifted and I love vintage clothes
- I have a degree in general studies and minors in history and philosophy
- I have a postcard collection documenting nearly every country/cool sight I’ve visited in the last few years

If you think we’d get along, feel free to send me a message. Tell me a little about yourself (name, age, where you’re from, hobbies, little quirks, etc). I’ll likely not respond if you send a simple “hi” or “hello.” I hope to hear from you!

I (F) have a crush on a guy from my work. I’ve been trying to get rid of it because he’s probably allo. I’m not looking to get rejected for being ace again, plus it would make work awkward if he rejected me. Anyone else do this too?

I’m (f22) in a relationship with my partner (m24) and I’ve been struggling to be romantic. This is my first relationship and this is his sixth relationship. Our relationship is new and we’ve still trying to get to know each other and find what works for us. My partner is very affectionate, open about his feelings, and romantic. I on the other hand, struggle to express those same things that come easily to him.

I get overwhelmed by his romantic gestures quite easily. He compliments me often and it gets me overwhelmed. He gave me a nice gift for my birthday the other day (flowers, a note, and a box of cookies) and I got overwhelmed by it. He says he’s been feeling like I don’t love him because I am standoffish and not very affectionate. He’s not wrong. I’m not good at expressing affection or being romantic. It doesn’t come naturally to me, it feels like something I actively have to go out of my way to do.

I thought I would be good at being romantic. For years, I’ve wanted a relationship. I would dream of it crave it. I always imagined myself being super romantic, touchy, affectionate, and sweet-spoken. Now that I’m actually in a relationship, I’m distant, standoffish, and unaffectionate. Being romantic with my partner doesn’t particularly entice me even though I love him. I’m not repulsed by the idea of it, it just feels ‘meh’ to me.

This has left me wondering if I’m aromantic. I’ve wondered if I was aromantic in the past, but this is the first time I’m genuinely asking myself this question. Am I truly aromantic or is there just an incompatibility between me and my boyfriend?

Me (22) and my boyfriend (24) have been together for 8 days. He’s my very first boyfriend, as I’ve never been in a relationship before. He has been in 5 relationships prior to ours. Ever since we got into our relationship, he’s been moving things very quickly. He says “I love you” frequently, talks about marriage, smothers me in compliments, and wants to call every day. He even bought me an expensive birthday present… which I feel awful about… I told him not to get me anything and he didn’t listen… This is a lot for me, especially since this is my first relationship. I told him I wanted to take things slow, but he hasn’t been doing that at all.

I called him yesterday to let him know that his clinginess and pushiness was overwhelming me. I didn’t want to talk about things like marriage so early into our relationship. I also said that the intense affection has been overwhelming me and I would appreciate it if he could dial it back. He took it very well and said he would change his behavior. He apologized multiple times as well.

Next day, we call before I head to work. He says he wants to call me again after work. I say “no” because it’s my birthday and my family may be surprising me and my plans aren’t set in stone. He kept pressuring me into calling him and I gave in. I was so shocked by his behavior that I lost all my backbone. He also kept being overly affectionate with me during the call even though just yesterday, I told him to dial it back. He kept calling me beautiful and smothering me with other compliments while staring at me (we were on FaceTime). I understand wanting to admire your girlfriend, but this is so much to handle… I felt uncomfortable…

I want to end the relationship because I feel he has betrayed my trust and boundaries. I explicitly told him my boundaries and he disregarded them the very next day. Am I overreacting or am I justified in my feelings?

I was dating an allosexual guy and things were going great for a while. We had a lot in common, got along great, and he said he didn’t see my asexuality as a dealbreaker. We were in love and started getting into a relationship after a month of dating.

He took me on a Valentine’s Day date and was acting off the entire time. I kept trying to make him laugh since I thought he was having a rough day. The next day, he wasn’t replying to my texts. After a few hours of silence, he sent me a breakup message. He didn’t want to date me anymore because I was asexual.

He took me on the Valentine’s Day date so he didn’t have to be the jerk to dump me on Valentine’s Day.

I was devastated and became severely depressed for months. I eventually gathered my bearings and gave dating a shot again. I struggled with dating since I couldn’t find myself clicking with anyone. I’ve been dating on-and-off since I got dumped last Valentine’s Day, but I can’t develop crushes or fall in love anymore.

This makes me feel like something within me is severely broken. I have a deep desire for romance, but I don’t have the motivation to act on it anymore. These polarizing feelings tear me apart sometimes. I used to be so optimistic about romance, but I feel like getting dumped completely changed me as a person.

How do I get over the hurt I feel inside? How do I regain my ability to fall in love? It’s been over a year, I feel like I should be over this by now.