r/asexualdating

i ❤️ nerds and am allergic to cats (unfortunately)

Hi all! My name is Shóna. I’m just trying to find a relationship where I don’t have to keep trying to explain myself. I’m aceflux and sex-indifferent. What I’m really looking for is someone who will hold me and I just want to be cuddled and kissed and it not have to turn into something else. I’m from Ireland and living here. I’m ok with doing an LDR but living in Ireland is preferred. I’m looking for something between the ages of 24-30, I’m 26 years old.

Some info about me:

-I’m asexual (aceflux) and monogamous

-I’m 5’3 and I’m chubby and don’t work out

-I have some tattoos

-I love BL and if you also like BL that’s a bonus

-I’m not really religious or political so I don’t have much opinions on them

-I have dentures and missing teeth because of something that happened when I was a baby

-I have two specific friends that I RP with on discord and you can ask about it.

-I’m an introvert and can be nervous at first but once I’m comfortable with you I’m much more relaxed and weird 🤣.

Please feel free to DM me if you wanna get to know me more. I look forward to chatting ☺️

Hi i am new to reddit and all that but i figured i could try to give this a shot!

I'm Gabriel, I'm 23 almost 24 from Switzerland and i recently figured out that i am ace. I would love to meet new ace people for friendship or for more :)

Some infos about me:

- I'm pan and monogamous

- I'm 5'3/1m60, average build but i dont work out

- i am not sex repulsed i would say i am indifferent to it but mostly leaning toward not interested

- i have some tattoos but i want a lot more

- i can speak french and english but thats it

- I'm politically very left and agnostic

- i know i have longish hair in my picture but i actually shaved my head recently i just suck at taking pic so i dont have a more recent one

- I'm an introvert and shy but i love metting new people still!

- i love to travel and wanna see the world

- but beside traveling i am quite a home body and would rather spend a cozy evening at home than party for exemple

- I love art and i draw sometimes, i enjoy video games, listening to music, reading, horror movies but i enjoy watching shows and movies in general and a bit of everything and i am always open to recommendations same thing for music. I love discovering new things :)

- I love animals and would love to have a cat or a dog soon but i cant for the moment sadly

I am open for a long distance relationship and beside a deep connection with someone i am not looking for anything in particular and am quite open! If you are interested you can shoot me a dm I'd love to chat :))

Hi! 26yo sex averse Ace living in Arizona USA. As much as finding someone local would be amazing, those odds are…not great. But I am not committed to my state (or country for that matter) and I’m open to long distance as long as the time zone difference is under 10hrs max, AND with the goal of closing the distance one day.

Stats/likes:
• Left politically
• Agnostic
• Riddled with adhd and other goodies
• Introverted but not shy
• 5’8 (172cm)
• Brain rotted humor
• I love reading, painting/drawing, photography, traveling, nature, video games, junk journaling, tattoos, and anything horror/weird/fantasy/nerdy.
• Not much of the party type but I do love a live gig night with a friend (or you?? 😏wink wonk). I lovee discovering new music and have been trying to go to more live shows this year. If you give me recommendations I will actually listen to them! Some favorites: Cocteau Twins, Motionless in White, Hozier, Ghost, Flyte, Jutes, The Smashing Pumpkins, The Cranberries, Spiritbox, The Sunday’s, etc etc. I’ll stop there and spare you the blah blah blah yap hshs.
• Huge animal lover so I’m pro any pet, but if you do not like dogs/don’t want/can’t have them this will not work. That might sound silly I know, but I gotta have at least one dog I’m sorry ok :’)
I have a not so interesting blue collar job but I do love my team of grumpy “work uncles”. It’s not the forever career but I’m still trying to figure out what that will be. So if that’s a red flag for you, there it is I suppose.

Looking for:
• Between 25-32y.
• Open minded and not afraid to be themselves.
• Willing to go slow and actually get to know each other.
Ultimately I’m looking for someone and somewhere for me to belong to. I’ve met some cool people along the way but still searching for that person that I fully click with x

I feel like I’ve been typing forever so I’ll leave this here. If you read this far thank you.

Hey everyone!

New here and trying to navigate the accepted realization of being on the Ace spectrum. Quite frankly, it makes sense. I’m a 33yr old female from Ontario, about 2hrs from Toronto. Half Canadian, half Jamaican on my dad’s side. Sarcastic with a dark sense of humour.

I’m preferably looking for a LTR but want to ease into it! I’m looking for deep connections and appreciation, not a quick relationship. I favour romance and I’m sex neutral but leaning more on not interested. I’m open to friends; male, female, nonbinary ect.

I have far too many hobbies that have been sent into the graveyard. However, I always revive them eventually! Currently, gaming, learning cello and kickboxing are my go too ! I love travelling and my 2yr old American bully Hendrix! I have a good job but eventually would like a career change!

Instead of putting all my favourites here; I’ve made a couple 3x3’s for my favourite anime, games and tv shows/movies! They’re ever changing but usually stay the same!

Feel free to message me and good luck everyone ☺️

(I'm emboldening keywords so you can skim over this before reading it in full if you're still interested. Hopefully that's helpful.)

Hi! It's me Marc, trying my luck again here. Before I say anything else, I should clarify that I am allosexual, but I am terribly lonely and have been for at least 6 years, if not longer, and so I'm trying everywhere that I can on the little chance that I'll meet the right person. It's not against the sub's rules me posting, so here goes. I know there are some demisexual/greysexual women on here, but there might also be some asexual women who are open to doing stuff of that nature, but don't want it in and of itself, if that makes sense. It's for those women that I'm writing this post. Hopefully I have enough to offer them as a person, be it in looks, or be it in this thinking-feeling creature behind the looks, enough to offset any inconveniences posed by our differing levels of sexuality. I'm open to 'negotiating' how this can work. Yes, I'm that weird :) I think about things like a computer programmer, so please excuse my peculiar way of explaining things.

I know some asexual people don't have physical types, maybe some do, but in any case, I do. It's not very complicated. I'm physiclaly attracted to women of a similar physical type as myself. You can see me, I look like I've been starved hahahaha. I'm 6'2 and 62.1kg. I'm technically an 'ectomorph'. And, yes, I'm obviously a nerd ha. Lol if you could imagine me with a wig, maybe differently coloured hair, and probably shorter, because women are usually shorter, and I don't care about height, then that ought to do it xD Please don't take that so literally. If physical attraction wasn't a thing for me, maybe I'd date a man. But biology is as biology is.

Right, now that we've got that out of the way. Like I said, I'm Marc. I'm 29, and I live near Manchester, England. I'm 'child-free'. I can't live with pets (because I really don't like their bodily waste, chiefly). I can be your pet xD Or you mine, I'm easy. And I'm not one for long-distance travel because I'm not sure I could sit on a plane for 3+ hours.

I'm open to long-distance dating provided you have a reasonable way of getting to me because if I'm honest, I probably won't be able to get to you. I'll help you as much as I can, but I should be clear, it's a lot easier to move to Britain if you're a doctor, a nurse, or a social worker, or maybe a software developer, or some other STEM field. There are certain careers which the government really likes, basically. If you're already in Britain, we could meet half-way on the train or something. If you're not, I guess I just have to be an excellent landing party :)

I'm looking for somebody who won't just bail on me over the tiniest of thing - and believe me, this happens a LOT, I'm 29 but I feel a thousand years old. I hope you'll agree that availability, openness, clear communication, and effort are key to making this work! Please, please don't ghost me after your first or second message. Just don't message me in the first place if you think you might want to do that. If we're not a fit, please just say so, instead of disappearing and leaving me wondering. I will treat you with the same kindness and respect.

I'm a very open person. I value honesty, but, of course, I try and be polite. I'm a bit socially awkward sometimes, but I try and not make a complete fool of myself. I generally mean no harm. I care a lot about the people I let into my life. Even though I'm 29, I still love a bit of silly fun. My sense of humour is a mix of dry, absurd, abstract, dark, and a bit dirty lol. But I think I know when to be serious. I can be a bit sensitive, but I'm good at gritting my teeth and not causing drama. I probably get attached too easily, so please don't abuse that lol. I mostly keep to myself. I don't do night clubs, big parties, loud concerts, that sort of thing. I prefer 1-1 interactions or small groups. However, if for some reason I find myself with an audience, I will perform xD I do like a bit of a sing and dance. I have limbs which are rather flexible. I like to spend time in my cave, but I also love going for walks around the woods and fields or around town, or even sometimes up a hill (though I haven't been for a while), and I love the occasional bus-trip. So watching films together, TV series, or perhaps playing a game, or whatever takes your fancy, are on the cards. Or we could just be old school, and, y'know, snuggle. I also am wont to go down intellectual rabbitholes. I tend to get fixated on things, and then sometimes just switch over to something else, or stay on the same thing for weeks. When I was a kid I used to love getting dressed up, but as an adult I haven't had any in-person friends who have wished to do so, so I'd definitely be open to cosplay. We could have a costume chest at the end of the bed! :] Or just roleplaying over text could be fun. Even better in-person, of course. With the costumes. Everything's better with costumes. Including making tea. My bunker to survive the apocalypse would have to include a UV tea garden.

I have OCD and anxiety, and I eat a restrictive diet. I view myself as a work in progress. As a consequence, I'm currently unemployed, but I did work for 6 years as a software-engineer. I guess I shall seek out another work-from-home office-y type job when I'm able. Right now I could only do part-time, but employers tend to want 9-5, you see. I do have savings to buy a flat from when I was a software-engineer, so I'm not a complete financial liability. Lol am I housewife material? xD So I guess it makes sense if you have some challenge of your own, else you might view me as a dead weight, albeit maybe a sometimes pretty one lol.

Hopefully some of this was enjoyable to read. If you're interested, please send me a brief intro to yourself with like two photos, and we'll see where this goes! I love getting to know somebody new :)

And just a personal gripe, if the 'no kids' or 'no pets' thing is a dealbreaker for you, then you don't need to tell me that. I already know I belong to a minority of people. It seems whenever I post this somebody likes to tell me that, and it's honestly not necessary :)

Have a nice rest of your day!

~Marc

They tell you to lower your standards, to settle for "good enough."

I'm here to tell you: don’t listen to them.

Greetings, all. I am Matthew. I write to you from a place that sounds like it belongs in the Twilight Zone: the intersection of profound limitation and radical possibility. You see, when I inspected the unlucky hand the universe dealt me, that's when I chose to sculpt a meaningful life from the wreckage.

My body is a battleground. To me, living with a constellation of non-visible chronic illness—Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome, Mast Cell Activation Syndrome, Small Fiber Neuropathy, Sjögren's Syndrome, and more—is not a tragedy. It is an apprenticeship in resilience that most people will never experience. Every day I wake up and fight wars inside my own flesh, and I win. Not because it doesn't hurt (it does) but because quitting was never an option. By the way, I don't expect you to already know those conditions. We can talk more about them as time goes on. I've lived with most of them since I was a child (although the diagnoses arrived much later), so I have a very good handle on them.

My mind is a laboratory. I study biology not as a collection of facts, but as poetry written in the language of cells. I dissect philosophy not to memorize arguments, but to sharpen my understanding of what it means to be human in an inhuman world. I think about ethics, the experience of human suffering, and about how it’s never too late to make the most of anything. Like many of you, I also take care to manage mental health issues like anxiety, depression, and ADHD but also more advanced challenges like CPTSD. I am neurodivergent (living with Asperger's) so I think and communicate somewhat differently, but because I actively try to accommodate your communication style, it's not an issue (I didn't even get a diagnosis until 24).

My heart is a fortress. I am demisexual not because I lack passion, but because my capacity for romantic love is so absolute that I choose to reserve it for one person, one lifetime. I’m not about surface level or games. I’m about devotion that builds slowly and intentionally, loyalty forged through shared depth rather than fleeting chemistry.

Hobbies and Interests:

I’m usually a cozy homebody, choosing to spend quality time with people I care about in a quiet setting. I love the occasional board game, and I’m willing to try new ones with patient people. I don’t play video games much these days, but when I do, I prefer to play casual games with friends (mainly Stardew). When I go out, I like to walk and talk with people as I get to know them. Visiting parks, walking trails, and just getting out in nature are simple (and free) things that I really enjoy doing. I find peaceful coexistence and presence in a shared space to be especially recharging. I keep a journal and a gratitude journal, and I meditate intermittently--I'm trying to make it a habit. I'm an avid reader and passionate writer. I'm always looking for new hobbies, so if there's something you're really into, I'll try just about anything at least once--especially arts and crafts.

What I'm looking for:

Someone who also rejects the toxicity of settling, but embraces healthy compromise. Someone who sees the chaos of this world and wants to build something beautiful from it anyway, together. Someone who:

• Values depth over distraction
• Seeks meaning in a meaningless universe
• Wants to change the world (not just navigate it)
• Understands the awesome power of simple human choice
• Knows that love is an act of revolution

What I offer:

In a committed relationship? Absolute loyalty. Unwavering support. A partnership forged in fire and tempered by adversity. Someone who will stand beside you when the world tries to knock you down—not because I'm perfect (I'm not) but because I know what it means to fight. I will:

• listen when you need to be heard
• challenge you when you need to grow
• offer deep, stimulating conversation (without condescension)
• map the constellation of your scars (because they’re beautiful)
• build a life with you that prioritizes intention over convenience, authenticity over performance

Practicalities:

• open to chatting with ages 20-40
• open to US only for romance (midwest preferred, not required)
• if you’re just looking for friendship, I’m open to that worldwide

Conclusion:

If you're someone who's tired of games, who values authenticity over impression management, and who wants to build something real instead of just collecting matches on an app, let's talk. No pressure or expectations, just two aces seeing if there's something there. If you've made it this far, that's proof enough to me that you're someone worth getting to know. Message me.

Thanks for reading. Be well.

Hello! This is a part 2 of my original post, because I believe I was too vague. My name is Emma (19F), and Im currently living in Idaho, but I was born and raised in the California bay area. Someday I plan to move back there fully. I truly hate dating, and I think I may just settle for a dog and die alone.

I am sex-indifferent. I completely give up dating others when they desire sex. I thought it was the only way to keep a man that promised me love, but I don’t have to settle for that. It’s down-right painful. I want hand-holding, pining, cooking dates, venting about our hobbies, etc. I want romance. It’s all been there done that for me. I know what I want in man. I’m drawn to the idea of an older, protective, emotionally dominant man who adores me, takes care of me, and makes me feel wanted and special. What I want in a relationship is to be the soft one. If you haven’t a clue on how to do basic stuff like chores, taxes, etc. Kick rocks. The only mother I want to be is with our children (Yes, I do want children in the future).

Here’s some stuff about me.

- Female

- 20 in June

- I write profound short stories, and poetry.

- Mixed. Mom is black/mexican, Dad is white/Native American

Hi all!

I'm not much of a Redditor but I was directed here by some friends of mine so here goes nothing!

I'm an artist living in a quiet country town in south west Queensland Australia. I cook, clean, and pay taxes.

When I'm not working, I'm at home drawing comics, making games, doing woodwork in my shed downstairs, or feeding the small army of stray cats that love to hang out on my lawn.

I'm looking for someone creatively minded who I can bounce ideas off. A creative sparring partner, if you will. If you're looking for someone ok with parallel play, but still likes hanging out on the porch and chit chatting the afternoons away, hit me up! I'm looking for you! 😁

Hello!

This feels very awkward to me, but I wanted to give this a shot!

I’m an aroace (sex and romance repulsed) woman from Wisconsin looking to make friends with other aces. I’d also be interested in a QPR with another aroace person. Being ace can get lonely and I’d like to find someone I can share a close bond with.

A little about me:

I’m pretty introverted and can be kind of awkward at first, but usually warm up pretty quickly if we vibe. I’m currently a student and work in a library.

I play/make a lot of music in my free time. I play the cello and a little bit of guitar. I used to play in a punk band, but mostly do indie and experimental stuff now. I’m a big fan of classical music, punk, jangle pop, and jazz.

I love classic literature and philosophy. I promise it’s not in a pretentious way, but in a cool and mysterious kind of way ;) I’m currently reading Crime and Punishment and just started The Gay Science.

Outside of that, I like learning languages (Mandarin and German), sewing, history, and historical fashion.

What I’m looking for:

I’m looking for someone around my age (21-33) with similar interests. I’d prefer if you were close-ish to me, but I might end up relocating, so I’m open to meeting people from anywhere.

In terms of dealbreakers, politics is the biggest one. I am a leftist and my politics are important to me. If you are right-wing, it’s not going to work out.

If anything I’ve written here interests you, feel free to reach out! I look forward to hearing from you! ^_^