u/Comfortable-Pain5600

As the title says, 18 weeks and my husband noted that I was coning when doing leg extensions - not a lot, but visible to him. I was only doing about half my usual weight.

Am I completely screwed?! I can't figure out if this means I need to stop weight lifting/do something else/start doing only pregnancy-specific routines. I haven't had coning in any other exercises.

I have a pelvic health physio appointment next week already so will definitely ask then but I'm a bit freaked out about what to do in the meantime.

Hi fellow bookworms 👋🏻

I'm an avid reader but recently fallen off the wagon and been watching just shit tons of netflix. I'm pregnant and just starting to feel the first trimester fatigue lift. I'd like to get back into reading but I've noticed my distress tolerance is basically zero now.

I previously used to read "proper literature" like The Kite Runner and The God of Small Things but I don't think my nervous system can take it at the moment!

I'd love to read some easy going or beautiful, uplifting fiction. Emotional as fine as long as it's not devastating. I'm already reading a lot of non-fiction pregnancy/birth books so no non-fic recs please.

Books I've read and enjoyed recently;

The List of Suspicious Things

Literally anything by Robin Hobb

All the Light We Cannot See

The Alchemist

Long books and series suggestions welcome - I'm a fast reader. Thank you in advance!

I'm 16 weeks pregnant with my first baby and have hit PRs this week and last week during my weight lifting sessions (two different exercises).

I wasn't really trying, just worked up to a good weight and found out it was a PR when I logged it in my app. I've been aiming for 7-8 RPE, not maxxing out by any means but working hard. I've read so much that says not to aim for PRs in pregnancy but what if they just... Happen? I'm not really keen on purposefully dropping my load and making my workouts ineffective. I have PCOS and muscle mass is so important, I do *not* want GDM.

For context, I've been lifting weights for about 3 years but always struggled with consistency. I have to stop from about day 17 of my cycle/dramatically reduce load, otherwise my DOMs would last like a week and I would get migraines on repeat. My cycle was often 30 days or more, so out of every five weeks, I usually couldn't lift properly for two. Since being pregnant however I have consistently lifted twice a week, every week. Weight was initially way lower, like 50% of previous. But now, I'm apparently strong as an ox? Has this happened to anybody else?

Also recovery has been really good during pregnancy, likely due to all the rest I am getting in between gym sessions.

TW; brief mention of pregnancy loss and suicidal ideation BUT overall a very happy story

I'm writing this because reading these stories really saved my sanity when I just could not cope.

Background; when starting IVF I was 32, unknown cause of infertility, husband had a cracking sperm count, we had been trying for 2+ years. Never been pregnant.

At my first appointment I outlined my history and as I was saying it out loud I had a lightbulb moment and said "actually, I wouldn't be surprised if I have PCOS." My specialist agreed, did an internal ultrasound, lo and behold; around 40 follicles. My ovaries looked like clusters of grapes. I started inositol immediately. This was August.

We continued trying whilst having some other tests etc done, with no luck. BUT the inositol did make my periods more regular. I have always ovulated, every month I tested, so that didn't change.

Come October we started preparing for our ER. I started oral progesterone (norethisterone) to help make my cycle more predictable and oh. My. God. It is the WORST medication I have EVER had to take. I couldn't sleep. I was an anxious wreck. A parking attendant was rude to me and I sobbed/hyperventilated so hard that all the windows in my car steamed up. On the drive home I considered that it would be easier to die than to live like this. So, I took the entire month off work. I'm sharing this because when I contacted my nurses about my symptoms they basically gaslit me and said it wasn't normal and to see my GP. But actually, unstable mood is listed in the side effects. When I saw my doctor she said I likely am 'progesterone intolerant' because I have really bad PMS (like probably PMD) and had previous really poor mental health on progesterone only contraception. I am not sharing to scare anyone, just to say if this happens to you (which is uncommon) please please know you are not alone. Get some professional support and take as much time as you can.

Moving on.

Starting stims was a doddle in comparison 😂 I got stimsomnia but I could handle it. The constipation wasn't fun but I followed all the advice on the OHSS posts on IVF threads from the get to and that helped. I responded quickly (PCOS bruh) and went in early for my ER.

We got 26 eggs, 16 mature, 8 fertilised, 6 embryos on day 3 and fucking ONE on day 5.

ONE.

I was distraught. I felt such a deep sense of loss. Our clinic could not tell us why we had such a high attrition rate. I actually contemplated whether God just did not want us to have children. It was so hard on my husband and I. This was November.

We didn't transfer in December, or January. We just needed time. The pressure was so high. We only had one little embryo and we both wanted to go in feeling ready for whatever happened next.

We transferred in February, 4AAB. We got a positive pregnancy test (our first EVER) right after my 33rd birthday. It is on par with my wedding day as the best day of my life.

I was super scared up until our first ultrasound, but there they were, perfect, little heartbeat going. Ever since then I have honestly loved every minute of my pregnancy, even with all the aversions and nausea and the sorest nipples I have ever had.

I have been weight lifting twice a week, consistently. I have a little bump now, which I adore. Our 12 week ultrasound was great, and seeing baby move was magical. At 15+2 I was at the gym and felt them MOVE for the first time ever. Like a little goldfish. I haven't felt it since but it was awesome.

And today, we heard their heartbeat for the first time ever at our 16 week midwife appointment. I thought I would be hard stressing because I know 3 people who have lost babies at 16 weeks in the last year or so, but no. I felt cool. Our baby is doing well and I know it in my bones.

I'm making a conscious effort to trust my body to grow this baby. I pray for them every morning, every night, and often in between. I am incredibly grateful and so in love with our baby.

If you managed to make it to the end, thank you for reading my story. I really, truly, sincerely hope that you all get to meet your babies one day (if you haven't already!)

I have so much love for this group. Thank you for everyone who has shared their stories before.

Hi fellow nerds,

I'm expecting my first baby and my husband and I are trying to find names that cross both of our cultures. He is Coptic Egyptian and I am white Australian. Our kids will live in the UK/Australia.

We have liked quite a few Greek names because many Coptics have Greek names, and they are very common in Australia due to the high number of Greek Australians.

Today my lovely husband threw a wee spanner in the works... He wants to name our baby Cleopatra if it's a girl. On the face of it I do actually like it; she's a strong Egyptian queen, and I love her story/mythology. It means "glory of the father" which I also love. We would nickname her Cleo or Patty (which I actually think is so cute). But it just feels quite big and heavy, EVERYONE knows the story of Cleopatra. FWIW my husband and I are both very strong people who are comfortable living as our authentic selves, and I hope our children will be the same but you never know.

Also, our top pick for a boy is Leonidas, "son of the lion". So if we have a boy and a girl, Leo and Cleo is not really on. I'd prefer Patty and Nidas but they might not!

Our other top picks for a girl are;

Alexandria

Iris (my husband is not a huge fan but I adore it)

Aurora (not Egyptian but lovely)

Open to all thoughts but just please keep in mind I'm pregnant so be honest but kind 😅

Are pregnancy pillows worth it?

I'm 16 weeks and already feeling like I need something between my knees at night. I am a super hot sleeper so trying to find something as cool as possible. I'm looking at this one which is quite expensive, I feel like all the non-synthetic ones are though. https://www.etsy.com/uk/listing/711522508/organic-pregnancy-pillow-body-pillow?ref=share_v4_lx

Any thoughts? Has anybody had a similar pillow and loved/hated it?

Hoping for some solidarity or maybe a kick in the right direction.

I'm expecting my first baby (exactly 16 weeks today!) after almost 3 years TTC, and successfully conceiving via IVF.

My job is stressful, we don't have enough hours or staff but it is a really important job. I run a service that provides specialist infant feeding support to mums, including writing policies and training staff etc. I care about it so, so much.

Except... I really don't anymore. Since becoming pregnant all I can think about is finishing work and being with my baby. I'm exhausted. It feels so long away and I just don't know how I'll do another 20 weeks like this. My plan once I finish work is to be a SAHM and then, eventually, build a private practice providing infant feeding support. At the moment though, every day just drags. I can't drink coffee because it makes me sick, can't eat dark chocolate for the caffeine boost, even tea is a bit hit and miss.

I feel bad for the mums I am supporting, as they deserve so much better. But I'm honestly just so tired. I've also started having a lot of insomnia, which is definitely contributing. Did anyone else have insomnia around this stage, did it get any better? I also get awful premenstrual insomnia and had terrible stimsomnia. I'm terrified I'm just not going to sleep for the rest of my pregnancy and I'm going to ruin my reputation because I now suck at my job.

I'm looking for advice on my very specific situation, apologies in advance for all the details!

We have a flock of 5 girls, mixed breeds (Bova Neras, Lohman Brown, Brahma, Blue Maran). We got them at point of lay about 9 months ago so they are probably a year old now. They all get along rather well. The bottom of the pecking order is never excluded from food, dust baths with them all, etc.

We have a 15m squared run and let them have occasional supervised free range time (they have a taste for my roses that I cannot abide). Our Brahma is currently in a cage in the coop because she is broody - so not involved in current politics.

We got 2 new point of lay hens 3 days ago. After some debate we decided to try, on advice from the breeder, just putting them in the coop at night and see how they went when they came out in the morning. It did not go well. Our girls are chasing, resource guarding (despite us hanging treats, scattering treats everywhere and putting in a new feeder and drinker - plenty of options). One of the new hens has lost a few feathers on her back and they are both also hiding from the gang of original chickens.

Yesterday, we took our girls out of the big run and put them in a 2mx1m run, cover with food and water and with a cat carrier to lay in. We reintroduced our gentlest hen a few hours later, she continued chasing and resource guarding against the new hens. We've taken our existing hens out again today, and plan to keep them separated all day today.

We've put in a hay bale and some boxes to act as barriers but it's not enough to slow our gangsters down.

My question is; how do we fix this? Do we just keep them separated for as long as possible and re-introduce really slowly, or try another of our girls with them tomorrow? Our existing girls are acting like gangsters and the new ones just seem so sweet and scared.

TLDR; have two runs available, one small one big. New hens initial introduction didn't go well, how can we fix it?