u/Constant_Outside9950

I’m only 4 months separation, a week into filing. He left very suddenly leaving me and daughter in house with no goodbye. My STBX is having our 5yo daughter two nights in every 8 days. Between that, he literally doesn’t speak to me or her. He went once 8 days no contact and also when me and daughter went away, he never got in touch to ask how she was or if we got there ok.
I’ve spoken to him about it in the past, especially because she’s asked to speak to him and he didn’t reply.
I have no idea what is appropriate co parenting contact and if I’m asking too much as an ex partner. It makes me uncomfortable just rocking up to drop her off when we have literally no contact from him.

For context, my recovering addict husband left us suddenly just under 4 months ago. Of course I’ve discovered he’s been seeing someone else already as well.
He has her for 2 days in every 8. Recently, his days changed and he ignored a couple of texts about our 5yo daughter, one where she was asking to speak to him. My question is how do you deal with the minimal contact your co parent offers? I’ve spoken to him twice about speaking to her and keeping up contact but he says he doesn’t want to talk to me and that’s why he didn’t reply. I also took my little girl on holiday and he didn’t even check that she was alright there.
I’m struggling to make sense of this massive chaotic change in him - he was such a loving doting dad, albeit when he was high - and I feel really uncountable just dropping her off after a week of nothing from him to her. However, I am also struggling between using contact with her as a pawn or advocating for her and the respect she deserves.

Just found out my husband (not even filed yet) has been seeing a “friend” on a few dates. He left very suddenly on a Saturday afternoon just under 4 months ago (after a month stay at rehab I will add). Anyway, I am obviously devastated by the discard and then this bombshell landed on me.
My question is, whilst I’m navigating this pain and this man who no longer feels like my husband, what kind of conversation should I next approach? I don’t want my daughter introduced (yes probs because of pain) but she’s also only 5 and is only just getting her head around her dad suddenly no longer living there.
Just looking for advice on the type of conversation I can have that will protect my daughter but also my peace?

For context, my husband hid a secret addiction for 5 years and when I found out in March this year, he went to rehab for a month. He got out then left me 5 days later, saying he didn’t love me.
I’ve since found out he is now seeing someone he’s been “friends with for 20 years”. I’ve no doubt this made his total discard of me and our daughter very easy for him.
How can I start to take my life back and see this as positive? I feel like I’ve been strung along supporting this man , seeing him through hardships and I’ve been left for some new woman and he’s already playing house with her barely 4 months after he left.

How much of my STBX addiction am I at liberty to share with others?
For context, he walked out on me and our children 4 months ago and no one can quite believe his abandonment. He still sees the kids but his decision to leave was completely out the blue, only 5 days after getting out of rehab at the time.

I find when I’m explaining my story, the addiction is such a massive part of it. Sometimes I share it, sometimes I don’t. I covered his secret for 3 years before finding out he’d been using the entire time and he started telling others about it. I followed his lead, but obviously now that’s not the case. So much of my experience went completely unnoticed and unheard and so now I feel like this is my story just as much as it is his. Still, I’m worried about pissing him off.

I’m keeping my married name so that I share the name with my daughter.
I know it’s not a big deal but I’m a teacher so my name will be used every day. Just wondering whether to go for Miss or Ms - what did people do?

Ex left me 2 months ago so I’ve been getting a lot of legal advice and I feel really well informed with everything.
I’m looking to keep the family home, pay him some equity, get it drawn into the financial order.
How much did people pay in total for the full divorce after paying the initial £600 fee? I know there’s a £60 court fee too but just had one legal firm quote me £2k-4k.

I’ve been going through absolute hell for the last 8 weeks since my husband left me and my daughter unexpectedly saying he didn’t love me.
Since then, I’ve been shown nothing but true love. My friends, my family and my colleagues have rallied round me so much. Cooking me meals, taking me out, buying gifts, turning up at my house, sending countless messages and constantly listening to my same old stories.
Anyone know how I can show gratitude to all these wonderful people?

I’m in the UK.
My husband is seeking divorce but has not yet applied for it.
I am wanting to stay in the family home for the sake of my daughter. We need to agree a buy out figure. If we agreed on less than 50%, which we are both thinking, what is the likelihood that the judge will challenge the consent order on the basis of it not being fair? We were thinking 35% to 65%.

I’m in the UK. My husband is seeking divorce but has not yet applied for it.
I am wanting to stay in the family home for the sake of my daughter. We need to agree a buy out figure. If we agreed on less than 50%, which we are both thinking, what is the likelihood that the judge will challenge the consent order on the basis of it not being fair? We were thinking 35% to 65%.

My husband is seeking divorce but has not yet applied for it.
I am wanting to stay in the family home for the sake of my daughter. We need to agree a buy out figure. If we agreed on less than 50%, which we are both thinking, what is the likelihood that the judge will challenge the consent order on the basis of it not being fair? We were thinking 35% to 65%.

How often do you talk to your children when they’re with your ex? This week will be the first time my daughter is with her dad for more than one night, meaning I’ll have my first full 24 hours without her and I’m thinking of wanting to ring and just ask her about her day. Is that unfair when I have her 5 days out of the 7 and he doesn’t ring her?

My husband walked out on us and wants a divorce 5 days after coming out of rehab. We’re only 6 weeks in and he’s at his parent’s house so we’ve not filed yet. She goes there twice a week and stays with him there. Just wondering what custody looks like for people? Do you just work on the assumption they’re remaining sober? He’s a great dad and my daughter loves him but obviously I’m thinking of her welfare.

My ex set up brown noise on Alexa and I’m wanting it set it up on mine. It’s a specific one that plays with a little jingle at the start and then plays all night. I think he said he paid 99p for it a few years ago. Anyone any ideas how I can set it up? I’ve tried on the skills section but none of them sound the same

My husband is in NA and got out of rehab a few weeks ago, clean after 5 years. 5 days later, he said that he can’t fight for our relationship as he doesn’t love me and we’re no longer compatible. The conversation was totally out the blue and he said it suddenly then just walked out.
He’s always been such a family man. Whilst in rehab he was very much fighting for our family, constantly saying how much he valued our 15 year relationship.
What really hurt is he said that he’s been unhappy for a while and “self medicating”, which just does not line up with how he acted, what he said, our wedding, baby etc everything. He’s now got me questioning if he only ever felt happy because he was using, despite us being together for 10 years before his addiction.
I’m just wondering if people have experience of a Q who has bolted so early into their recovery? It felt like he felt the pressures and flew to his mum’s.
(He hasn’t met anyone else in rehab as I know some people will say this!)
I’d like to add though that I am now doing better 4 weeks on. I have accepted this is the end of our marriage and I’m determined to move on with my child for their sake.

My husband left suddenly on a Tuesday afternoon and has retained it’s been the right decision for 2 weeks now. How do you mourn the loss of the family life you thought you would have? The grief is so immense.