u/Disastrous-Sand7943

I’m turning guy turning 18 in a week and have been occasionally hookup up with a 20yr old dude the past month. I can’t get past the feelings I have for him and it honestly hurts.
Hes the sweetest guy ever. I have pretty severe gross scars on my thighs from SH when I was younger. I’m so self conscious and insecure about them and it makes being intimate with someone really hard. He was really sweet about them, was judgemental and he always makes sure I’m ok during sex. I lost my virginity to him and it was really nice, it’s always passionate and we cuddle afterwards.

I don’t talk to many people but I feel like I can be myself around him which I’ve never really felt with someone before. But I know he barely knows I exist and doesn’t ever think about me. He leaves me on delivered on snap for a day and only snaps back before the streak ends. I’m his #2 best friend on snap which makes things confusing though. While I’m on delivered he snaps so many people throughout the day. I know he’s hooking up with other guys.It’s not his fault I have a crush on him, it’s a me issue but I just really have to lose this because it’s getting me down. I’ve started leaving him on delivered, I’ve stopped trying to initiate a conversation. It just hurts that I know I’m nothing more than a hookup to him. He’s not even specifically my type at all but he’s a cute guy and was so kind and nice every time we have met up. Pls help me lose this, it feels bad

I’m turning guy turning 18 in a week and have been occasionally hookup up with a 20yr old dude the past month. I can’t get past the feelings I have for him and it honestly hurts.
Hes the sweetest guy ever. I have pretty severe gross scars on my thighs from SH when I was younger. I’m so self conscious and insecure about them and it makes being intimate with someone really hard. He was really sweet about them, was judgemental and he always makes sure I’m ok during sex. I lost my virginity to him and it was really nice, it’s always passionate and we cuddle afterwards.

I don’t talk to many people but I feel like I can be myself around him which I’ve never really felt with someone before. But I know he barely knows I exist and doesn’t ever think about me. He leaves me on delivered on snap for a day and only snaps back before the streak ends. I’m his #2 best friend on snap which makes things confusing though. While I’m on delivered he snaps so many people throughout the day. I know he’s hooking up with other guys.It’s not his fault I have a crush on him, it’s a me issue but I just really have to lose this because it’s getting me down. I’ve started leaving him on delivered, I’ve stopped trying to initiate a conversation. It just hurts that I know I’m nothing more than a hookup to him. He’s not even specifically my type at all but he’s a cute guy and was so kind and nice every time we have met up. Pls help me lose this, it feels bad

I’m 18 in a week and have been hooking up with a 20 yr old. (Age of consent is 16)
I’m a guy and I’ve seen him 4 times and lost my virginity to him. However I have strong feelings for him. He’s the kindest guy and really understanding. I have pretty bad scars all over my thighs from my past.I’m really insecure about these as they look disgusting and makes hooking up hard. He was really sweet and caring about it. During sex he asks me if I’m ok and he is just really caring.we cuddle afterwards. I can’t stop thinking about him and I know it won’t be reciprocated. I know I’m just a hookup to him and he barely knows I exist.
He leaves me on delivered on snap for a day while snapping others a lot however I am #2 on his best friends list. I know he’s searching for guys on hookup apps too and is probably hooking up.
It just hurts because I feel a connection to him. I feel like I can be myself around him and feel really comfortable.
It’s not his fault I like him and I need to take responsibility and lose this because it hurts knowing he’ll never feel the same and probably never thinks of me. I feel like I’m a hookup option when he can’t find anyone else. How do I lose this?

I’m 18 in a week and have been hooking up with a 20 yr old. (Age of consent is 16)
I’ve seen him 4 times and lost my virginity to him. However I have strong feelings for him. He’s the kindest guy and really understanding. I have pretty bad scars all over my thighs from my past.I’m really insecure about these as they look disgusting and makes hooking up hard. He was really sweet and caring about it. During sex he asks me if I’m ok and he is just really caring.we cuddle afterwards. I can’t stop thinking about him and I know it won’t be reciprocated. I know I’m just a hookup to him and he barely knows I exist.
He leaves me on delivered on snap for a day while snapping others a lot however I am #2 on his best friends list. I know he’s searching for guys on hookup apps too and is probably hooking up.
It just hurts because I feel a connection to him. I feel like I can be myself around him and feel really comfortable.
It’s not his fault I like him and I need to take responsibility and lose this because it hurts knowing he’ll never feel the same and probably never thinks of me. I feel like I’m a hookup option when he can’t find anyone else. How do I lose this?

I’m a 17 yr old guy. He’s 20. Throughout my life I’ve been really self conscious and insecure. My legs are covered in scars that look pretty severe and horrible.
I’m in a better place now and had a few hookups with someone and sex for the first time with them. The guy is such a nice guy, really understanding and kind and never judged me. I feel like I can be myself around him which is really rare for me. He wasn’t disgusted by my body which felt nice.
I can’t stop thinking about him and I know I’m nothing more than a hookup to him. He leaves me on delivered while his snap score goes up throughout the day. However I’m number 3 on his best friends list. I know he’s on hookup site and hooking up with other guys.It’s ok and not his fault I like him. How do I lose attachment. It hurts someone I really like barely knows I exist. I’m trying to become less excited when receiving a snap from him and just don’t open it for a day. I need to lose this. It’s hard. How do I become unattached?

I’m a 17 yr old guy. Throughout my life I’ve been really self conscious and insecure. My legs are covered in SH scars that look pretty severe and horrible.
I’m in a better place now and had a few hookups with someone and sex for the first time with them. The guy is such a nice guy, really understanding and kind and never judged me. I feel like I can be myself around him which is really rare for me. He wasn’t disgusted by my body which felt nice.
I can’t stop thinking about him and I know I’m nothing more than a hookup to him. He leaves me on delivered while his snap score goes up throughout the day. However I’m number 3 on his best friends list. I know he’s on hookup site. It’s ok and not his fault I like him. How do I lose attachment. It hurts someone I really like barely knows I exist. I’m trying to become less excited when receiving a snap from him and just don’t open it for a day. I need to lose this. It’s hard. How do I become unattached?:)

I’m 18 and don’t have a lot of experience. The FWB knows I’m pretty shy but I usually just moan “fuck yeah” “your dick feels so good” or say how hot he is.
What can I say. I don’t want to be unnatural and say something just to perform.
What would turn him on. Idk?

I’m 18. This post might be a little explicit.

So I have been diagnosed with sexual OCD about being asexual. This is where I severely obsess over the fact I might be asexual because it scares me. It’s a little deeper than that and there is absolutely nothing wrong with people being ace at all. This ocd has been so severe in the past I have had multiple hospitalisations I really just wanted to know if I sound like I might be?

I’ve known I was gay since very very young. Always known I’ve liked men. Around 11 when going through puberty I was always very very attracted to people and horny. Eventually when 15 I got the worry I might be asexual because I don’t get as horny anymore. Doctors have told me it’s just ocd why I’m worried about this. My compulsion to cope with this worry is masterbating.

I usually do this once a day.

Lately I’ve been using hookup apps and have been sexually active with 2 people. I know if I find someone attractive and good looking. I would never sexually engage with someone I did not think looked nice.

I have used a toy and it feels nice while watching porn.

I have specific porn actors I watch.

Every time I’ve done something with a guy I get an instant erection before even starting to kiss. I love going down on someone and tasting them.

I had sex for the first time a few days ago and I thought it was nice and would definitely do it again.

However I cannot cum. I don’t even get close when with another person. I worry I never get horny and only engage with people to prove I’m not asexual for my OCD. My penis is not sensitive at all, I barely feel anything and can’t even jerk myself off when with someone else. I barely even feel when someone goes down on me.

However after hooking up I want to do it again but can’t be sure if it’s because of my OCD.

I get erections when thinking about hookup up again.

I worry I’m no longer drawn to people’s face or looks anymore and I no longer feel attraction.

I worry I could easily live the rest of my life without sex or craving it

I’m not sure if that’s just my ocd feeling real or if porn is frying my brain.

I really just need to know if I sound asexual or if my doctors are right and it’s just the intense worry. Pls be totally honest. And I can not stress enough that just because my OCD is about being asexual I have nothing against asexual people! I absolutely love when people are themselves and so glad yall have a sub where you can come together and embrace it❤️❤️

OCD is very complicated and can make a minor or normal problem become scary even if there’s nothing to fear, so pls don’t think I’m against asexuals or think it’s bad to be that way!!