u/Doodleseatingdoodles

It’s a really sad situation, but I’ve worked at a daycare for 8 years now and I’ve known his family for 6 years now. About 4 years ago his wife developed breast cancer just after the pandemic and then became pregnant. She chose to keep the baby which also meant that she couldn’t do chemotherapy. Thus his son was born, but the cancer had then spread to her brain and she died when the baby was only a month old. I’ve been helping the dad out and honestly I feel like his son is almost my son. Now his son is three and still goes to our daycare and his 7 year old daughter loves me, as I to them. I keep my distance though and stay professional, but then a few months ago he started texting me out of the blue talking about his family dynamics and personal stuff. I saw it coming, sure enough he asked me out to dinner. I’m glad he’s trying to move on and wants to date, just don’t date your babysitter!

I feel weird about it. He’s a great guy and great dad but I work at the daycare his son goes to and also still want to help with the children. I feel bad for them, I said I didn’t want to be romantically involved and now he’s awkward towards me with short answers with periods at the end. I don’t want this to ruin the relationship I have with the children, but I think it ultimately might.

My coworkers keep joking that if he dates me he doesn’t have to pay for babysitting anymore.
Stop being weird and let things go back to normal!

Edit: he’s 37 and I’m 33. Not too weird, age wise

Edit II: 1: I did not expect this to blow up so much.
I’m not going to do it, even if internet strangers are telling me I have to and some are saying I was leading him on. How!?! This isn’t a porn scenario, it’s real life. I can tell which comments are men and which are women. I’m getting private messages saying I need to find him someone…no I don’t, Theres dating websites.

Think about it, I’m a huge avocate for keeping kids out of dating until it’s serious and that wouldn’t be an option even IF I liked him, which I don’t. I want my own family and my own life. This isn’t my family. The kids would have to be serious also right away and I don’t want that. If it didn’t work out I would feel so guilty and like I abandoned them. The whole issue is how he’s reacting to me saying no.

I’m 33, made the rough choice to leave my boyfriend and had to move back home with my mom. I can’t afford to live on my own, literally would have to live out of my car. All of my furniture is in a storage unit that I pay monthly for.

My mom is a severe alcoholic and I went to foster care two separate times in my childhood. The first time was because she beat me badly for trying to run away from home. I was only 7. And the second time was because my 2 year old brother was found wondering the streets when she was on a drinking bender and I wasn’t home at the time. I was 10.

Last night she asked I come downstairs, my family was playing operation. Sounded like fun and I go downstairs and we’re all playing fine when everyone said they were tired and went to bed. My mom had been drinking White Russians and as soon as my brother left, she turned to me and said that my step dad thinks I resent her. I didn’t know how to respond. I don’t hate her but I obviously don’t think she should win mother of the year. She then went on to tell me that everything I’ve been telling everyone is a lie.

I exploded. I haven’t even been talking about my childhood to my siblings (I have, but not recently) but we went to foster care, this isn’t a fever dream. I know it happened. She beat me so badly she tried to keep me out of school and it was the school who called CPS.

I immediately went upstairs on my computer and ordered documents of my CPS records. I’m not even going to show them to her, that will just escalate things and I need somewhere to live. But how dare she try to tell me it never happened.

I’m not leaving my bedroom today. I don’t know why she chose now to do this to me? My siblings are starting to have their own kids and maybe she doesn’t want her grandchildren hearing anything? shes just going to tell me I’m crazy and that shes a perfect mom?

I need to apply for public housing