u/Entire-Volume6660

Its the most unreal thought that I have, but I feel like if I was so watched by someone I parted ways from recently...

In public spaces, restaurants, neighborhoods and even Social media (althought they've hinted me before that they checked my posts one time)

I feel watched no matter how unreasonable it sounds.

I've tried fighting those thoughts by saying:

1. They're busy with their own life

2. Why would they even wanna watch my life anyways?

3. Its my anxiety rising

3.No needs to drain myself for something thats definitely not going on

4. And that Im safe

But I wonder how other people cope with this feeling too

I do so often, ever since I've met them.

It truly was lovely until we parted ways, and now I only dream them even more but only of goodbyes and of me seeking them so bad.

Its painful.

I have a history of hypnagogic dreams (nightmares), in which I experience utterly pain and paralysis

Which is coming back to me again.

When I met them they disappeared but now back again.

And always dream of my hopelessness and even physical pain at times recently

Got a nightmare today and a dream of them after the nightmare...

I wonder if anyone would like to share their experience in how we tend to recall those we love in dreams.

Literally, and we can't talk about it because we're not seeing eachother again and I find it quite funny. They're about to be 37 and Im 18

I feel like this was going for a long time

My ex therapist used to do so, and hinted it clearly, but not sure if its normal, because of just curiosity for your clients daily life you know...

I've planned it but never did anything in the physical world because it feels disappointing...

Wondering if they know that at some point their cycle ends...

Can it be an idea thats not set on stone too?

Because even all theories and definitions are perceptions too.

Although the most believable ideas are the ones that touch the most souls, the perception that even feels like your own.

In my opinion existential thoughts are the most deepest form of self understanding, and the understanding of the self leads into something much more deeper and superficial. You can realize that the place we're you are (in your form) is too a way to channel the truth.

And the truth is, everything and nothing at once colliding.

But thats just my own truth (one of the many I behold)

What's yours?

​

Can it be an idea thats not set on stone too?

​

Because even all theories and definitions are perceptions too.

​

Although the most believable ideas are the ones that touch the most souls, the perception that even feels like your own.

​

In my opinion existential thoughts are the most deepest form of self understanding, and the understanding of the self leads into something much more deeper and superficial. You can realize that the place we're you are (in your form) is too a way to channel the truth.

​

And the truth is, everything and nothing at once colliding.

​

But thats just my own truth (one of the many I behold)

​

What's yours?

​

You see through this container, its very strange, yet a norm.

When things become the norm, the questions and strangeness fades.

The magic of feeling that questioning again is that coming in contact with the unknown so many can't handle to submerge into because nothing is answered.

But what if that was the answer, nothing and just feeling the deep truth

Because truth is impossible to be worded.

Truth is all and nothing

Everything that exists

Nothing that has existed yet and has transcended

​