u/Exotic_Snapchatter

Hey everyone! Happy June!

To all the men out there struggling with mental health, whether you’re intersex, transgender, transmasc or cisgender, remember to take care of yourself. Happy Men’s Mental Health Month!

To all the transgender women, we love you we see you and we support you. Go girls!

To all the transgender men, try something new like trying a new workout or trying a new injection spot for T. Go boys!

To all the lesbians, femininity is a beautiful thing no wonderful thing, no wonder you want to envelop yourself in it. You are beautiful.

To all the gay individuals, you are not weak, you are strong brave handsome and you deserve all the love in the world.

To all the non-binary people umbrella people, I don’t understand why gender is even a thing, you all prove it doesn’t matter - it’s what’s on the inside that counts. I love you!

To all the intersex people, you are valid, you are real, and you are seen. We love you!

To all the bisexuals out there, it doesn’t matter who you end up with as long you love each other and are there for each other. The same I’m here for all of you!

And to everyone else; happy June everybody! Let me know what you’re up to this month - nothings too small!

Hey so I have a huge suspicion I may be intersex but I’m not sure. My genital area doesn’t look or feel right but I don’t know what it’s meant to look like because my school gave me a total of 3 sex ed lessons all pushed onto me as if I was female (I identified fully as a transgender male at the time and they knew this but refused to allow me to socially transition. I did remark multiple times how useless these lessons were to me if I planned on not keeping my body as it is as soon as I turned 18). Seeing as I know nothing about that, please try not to hate on me I am purely looking for advice. I am not explicitly asking for medical advice, just sharing my experience - I will be contacting a doctor as soon as my carers allow me to do so.

So from as early as before the age of 2/3, I am aware I always strongly felt and communicated how much I viewed myself as a boy. I grew up in foster care until I was 4 with an abusive foster carer who never educated me or spent time with me. I had no idea what the difference between boys or girls was but I just knew I felt closer in experience to the foster siblings who were called “boys” than I did the ones who were called “girls”. I hope that makes sense.

As I got older, I was raised fully as female by my adoptive family but always expressed my identity differently. I begged my entire childhood for short hair because I wanted to look like the other boys. I begged every September to not have to wear a skirt to school and had meltdowns when my parents told me I wasn’t allowed to wear shorts instead. Whenever we would go to get me new school shoes at Clark’s, I’d have full meltdowns because I was forced to pick from the girls section and not the boys section - I always wanted the thick soled boys shoes that velcroed up (I still want them although they wouldn’t fit lol).
When I was 8, I started showing the first signs of puberty but I didn’t know what was inherently masculine and what was feminine, I just knew my body was changing. I started to grow thick, long hair under my arms; I started to be a bit more curious about what people had in their pants and how it worked, what it was for etc.; I was even more drawn to fighting and rough play than I had been before (which was already a lot); I stopped socialising with girls completely however a lot of the boys rejected me because they saw me as a girl. I know some people say 8 is a normal age to start puberty and some people say it’s a little early - not sure if it’s relevant but I thought I’d add it.
Around the age of 9, the people who regularly bullied me for being weird (now meaning autistic) started bullying me for having a bit more of a gruff voice than the “other girls”. It wasn’t bad but it was substantially deeper than them. So I trained my voice to sit higher.

By the time I was 10, I was fully irritable constantly, my anger was uncontrollable sometimes and when I got upset I would just want to break things and hurt people. I knew I couldn’t control it but nobody else would listen, they just thought I was being difficult.
Around this time, I was assessed for autism (which took a total of 2 years to be fully diagnosed); Tourette syndrome (diagnosed within 18 months) and I was assessed for ADHD - please note, this first time around I was assessed for ADHD as a female and I was told I didn’t have it.
One day when I was around 10.5 I started bleeding a lot from my genital area and we assumed it was my period starting, it stopped after about 3 days and didn’t come back again for 3 months.
When it did come back, it was horrible. I had tummy cramps that felt like I was being stabbed from the inside with a blunt knife over and over; I bled through layers and layers of clothing within an hour; my mood swings were even worse than they had been before and all I did was shout, break things, and hurt people (which I am NOT proud of).

Just after I turned 11, my mum got concerned about the heavy bleeding and took me to a doctor; I was having a period every 4-7 weeks on average. This doctor was a woman and she was lovely, she was called Sarah. When my mum mentioned the heavy bleeding, she also mentioned casually about how my temper was so bad and out of control BUT it didn’t appear to line up well with the period, it seemed like it was a seperate cycle of its own every 5-7 weeks.
Dr. Sarah diagnosed me with pre-menstrual syndrome, prescribed Rigevidon (brand name, please google for more information on the ingredients if you’re unsure); and sent me on my way. She did not do a physical exam, ask any other questions or do any form of testing.
Now some people say that Rigevidon feminises your body and some people say it masculinises your body. I’m not sure which way around it was for me but I suspect if it did anything, it mainly feminised me as my masculine signs were already starting to show before I started the medication.
When I was about to turn 12, I was in an abusive school and I started getting depressed but I also started feeling what I now know to be gender dysphoria. Due to both of these things, I stopped talking completely until I had left that school and been put on Sertraline at 200mg.

When I was 13, I started at a new school after being out of education for a couple of months (again) which was due to my temper causing me to be kicked out of school (again). This would be one of 14 total places of education I have attended in my life.
I was quickly learning the terminology surrounding transgenderism around this time and I came out in confidence to a few of my teachers. They refused to allow me to use a different name or use different pronouns (I begged for a year every single day). One of the teachers also told a student known to be raised by homophobes that I “thought” I was transgender (whether by accident or not, this was NOT appropriate) and this student outed me to the entire school. I was bullied for the entire time I attended and the teachers didn’t do a single thing about it no matter how many times I reported it. I had my hair cut short around this time.

Around this time, I started getting extremely self conscious around my genital area - this next bit may be a bit TMI but it’s important for me to share. Fair warning:

So I have no idea what is normal but here is what I have:
I’ve been told that the clitoris on a girl sits under a “hood” which is supposedly the outer flaps of skin and that it’s a fairly small firm bump; apparently the underneath is supposedly open/exposed most of the time? So you don’t have to peel skin back to see anything. I do not have this.
Instead, I have a regular female looking outside from the front which is made of just two pieces of skin between my legs. Underneath, it is sealed shut but you can peel it open slightly. Underneath this skin, there is nothing except an opening (leading to the uterus); in front of that opening is a large long piece of red tissue - it has always been there my entire life and it has always been the same scale it is now - when straight but not stretched, it measures around 4cm however it can stretch when pulled up to 7cm without pain - it can physically stretch further but it becomes painful after that. It folds over, twists, and acts like a regular piece of tissue - it is NOT a firm bump. There is nothing inside it usually; it kind of has the look of a red deflated long balloon (😭?!).
It does swell with blood and erect the same as a male’s genitals do however I cannot see at this stage a definite head to it.
Behind this piece of tissue, is a much smaller identical piece attached to the back of it that I assume is what keeps it pulled up to my body. In the groove where these pieces meet, sits my urethra, right at the back base of the main piece.
Hair growth is apparently abnormal. I’ve been told girls grow thin-ish hair just on the front (again, not sure if this is true). I have hair growth everywhere. I have thick, coarse, rough dark hair on the front, in between, in and around this red structure and all the way through towards the back section. This hair has been there since the age of 9.

When I was just turned 14, I started getting tiny little cracks in my voice. I’d had a couple when I was 11 but nothing major. These were a bit more severe. It wasn’t an obvious “voice breaking” crack but it wasn’t normal either.
I also noticed a bit of a shadow on my upper lip and my hair started growing just below the middle of my ears but it wasn’t anything major.
At this point, I had major gender dysphoria and the bullying around my identity was so bad. I just wanted my education so I sat at the back of the class with headphones on all the time listening to music (soothes my autism and my tics) and completing my work on my Chromebook. I had a lovely teacher around this time called Hannah who understood how badly I was shunted away from socialising with my peers and did nothing but wanting to help me - she unfortunately didn’t have much power in the school. She didn’t allow anybody to make comments within her earshot though and was okay letting me sit with my headphones - she knew I could understand the work easily anyway and I didn’t need the explanation the rest of the class did. If I did need a bit of help, I’d just raise my hand and she’d come over so I could lift one side of my headphones and have some help. I am forever grateful for this teacher - she got me through the worst part of my school life. She tried her best to use neutral pronouns for me when she could but all the staff had basically been told to keep referring to me as a girl so she couldn’t always do it.

As I reached 15, I practically stopped the feminine traits of my puberty and my body just began masculinising as much as it possibly could.
All my body hair got thicker and darker, my arms and legs grew out hair as long as 1.5cm which was also thick and dark and my voice got substantially deeper. I became a bit more irritable however my psychiatrist had prescribed me some medication to take the edge off.
The only thing my brain could do was sexualise people and things (I was told this was down to my OCD but I don’t think so personally because it wasn’t a compulsive thought, it was just there.. constantly).

I reached 16 in March 2025 and I was put into the UK care system 4 days before my 16th birthday (my temper got too much for the parents who now basically want nothing to do with me).
I was in abusive care for three months with an unregistered carer and moved every night to a different house across the country. This lasted throughout the entirety of my GCSES. This carer didn’t allow me to take my Rigevidon (causing me to become seriously ill which I had told the school and they did nothing about), he didn’t allow me to take my antipsychotic medication (the thing stopping me killing him lol), and he “forgot” to feed me constantly. Most days I would be woken around 7.30; refused my medication; I’d get to school and rush down a drink before heading to the classroom; I’d enter, sit down, get a load of the usual comments thrown at me, and just sit with my headphones on (I had a different mix of teachers at this point. Hannah was now my English teacher and I rarely saw her. None of the others liked the fact I had headphones on but they gave up eventually knowing I’d just have an attitude or start disrupting the class); I was living purely on a bowl of chips at lunch in the canteen and on Thursdays it was Chinese noodles. I have ARFID and traits of Anorexia so I struggle eating anyway and the constant comments towards my body didn’t help.
Over the weekends, I wouldn’t eat at all. I wanted to, I begged to. But this carer had cut off my food and activity allowance.

I know you’re thinking “why is this relevant”. I have a feeling the severe chronic stress and the lack of food and medication was the main reason for why I haven’t grown to what I was expected to be by now. I was expected be 5’10 - 6’ by this age due to my biological parents being freakishly tall. I am currently still growing however I am only just under 5’7.

Anyway.. by the time I was 16.5 my voice was showing real signs of breaking. It would crack and squeak constantly; high notes when I sang were impossible, it would just go silent.
I also had a few regular carers (I was now in a residential placement) pointing out they could see a couple of light mustache hairs, not just a shadow anymore.
I ended up in youth court because of threatening to hurt someone for illegally following me off the premises (that’s a whole separate story). I don’t think my temper is JUST due to my autism or PMS. There’s no way; it’s far too severe. Plus autistic temper feels different and it’s caused by overstimulation. I can be sat perfectly happy, nothing will happen and I’ll just suddenly get filled with rage and want to break everything.

I am now 17 and I have full light beard hairs coming in everywhere; it’s not even patchy. It’s fully on my cheeks and jawline. I have thick sideburns filling in and I have dark mustache hairs where it hugs around the top lip.

My facial structure is masculine; I have a very solid square jaw, I have a sharp jawline (getting more obvious now I’m getting rid of my fluid retention). I have high outset cheekbones (which people have always commented on). And the kicker: I have an extremely obvious v-shaped hairline receeding at the temples concerningly rapidly. It’s slowing down slightly but still going back.
I am not on any form of treatment except asthma inhalers and the rigevidon - hopefully soon I can stop the rigevidon as I am looking for a full hysterectomy due to the severe symptoms I have surrounding periods and the fact my carers are unable to understand that I do not “need a break” from it every 3 weeks and they are to give medication as instructed - they also don’t seem to understand they are not allowed to refuse such vital medication due to my “attitude” (which is usually caused by them not GIVING me the damn medication).

Anyways I have no idea if I’m intersex or not, it seems like it to me but my brain thinks it’s too good to be true that I have some naturally male features. I hope this helps someone else somehow, I will update in the future on how this journey continues.
Feel free to ask any questions.
Happy pride month :)

so it turns out i might not be transgender ftm at all. it’s extremely likely im actually intersex and have CAH. i’m going to try and see a doctor to be tested soon :) ill update yall as it goes

Hey there Reddit,
I’m currently in the UK and I turn 18 in March 2027. I’m looking to move to Canada - specifically the Ottawa area, as soon as I can (likely as soon as I turn 18).

I’ve been trying to research for weeks and nothing is clear. One website tells me one thing then another website tells me the opposite.

I wish to attend a high school in Ottawa (which I have pre-selected) and I also wish to find a part-time job that allows me to afford to live there.
I am trying to find a full-time job here in the UK as soon as possible to start adding to my savings amount ready for the move.

My questions regard permanent residency and having to leave Canada.
If I’m able to go to school, i’ll likely go into Grade 11 as I only completed the equivalent of Grade 10 in UK education (I’ve been told that’s how it works). I was planning to move using an IEC working visa but then discovered you also need a study permit if you wish to attend school, I’d be okay with paying for a study permit in addition to the visa however I also found you have to intend to leave Canada after your study permit expires (I do not want to return to the UK. I wish to remain in Canada likely for the remainder of my time on the planet).

I’m wondering how I get around this. I have no family and I want to move there knowing I can stay and get citizenship as soon as I’m eligible but I also would love to attend school as I have no completed formal education (I moved around an awful lot which caused me to attend 14 schools in my life with huge gaps in between education).
Please help and provide any clear sources you can. I’m hoping there’s a way to move AS a permanent resident so I can attend school, work part-time, and live there for as long as I wish but I’m not sure if that’s possible - money isn’t exactly an issue as I have a large amount of savings and I’m looking into work at the moment.

Thank you so much in advance, if you need any more information or misunderstood something, please just ask. I’ll usually respond within 24 hours!
(Please also make sure you explain things I may not understand fully such as abbreviations or how to apply for certain things. Thanks)

Testosterone causes a higher body temperature in general and it causes you to sweat more than estrogen does.
Surely if we’re looking purely at function, it would make more sense for it to be the other way around. If men were the main hunters, surely their body temperature would make more sense to be lower seeing as exercise raises your temperature even more?

Probably only for the brits here.

When I was a kid coco pops tasted fresh and chocolatey, the milk would end up as chocolate milk.

Now? they taste of air and there’s basically nothing on them and they just go super soggy.

TW: Discussion of water and personal signs of early phobia

I have severe thalassophobia and I think I just realised a couple of childhood signs.
When I was about 3, my dad took me swimming in the sea with my little floaty and I SCREAMED my head off, my memory of it is purely just not being able to see anything but waves and I remember being in shock for the few days after that. I think it was one of the first times i’d been in the ocean and I don’t know where the fear stems from but that was a sign.
The other sign is when my mum used to take me out to walk the dog, we had to walk along this thin causeway (it’s like a natural bridge across a lake) and i was always TERRIFIED. I’d break out in a sweat. I was scared i’d fall in and I was also scared something else would jump out of the water at me. I’d refuse to walk across unless I was holding her hand.

Again, I don’t know where my phobia comes from but I have severe childhood CPTSD so maybe something happened in water too? I’m not sure.
I’m wondering if anyone else had any early signs of this phobia or any other phobia (if you’re comfortable sharing ofc).

What are our favorite episodes, scenes and seasons?

Personally, I love season 8. I think they developed the characters super well in the last season and there’s a lot more exciting moments.
My favorite early episode is when the car ends up in the kitchen (and i love how they did the scene the exact same with the same wording in Fuller House).
Favorite moments have to be Jesse singing Forever to Becky, Vicky and Danny meeting, and Stephanie’s wedding in the first season.

Hey guys, I’ve been looking at getting into some more masculine things. I don’t exactly have any specific personality or hobbies - I like sport, music, working out.
I want to be able to pass better as a stealth guy anyway but I need to also build up a personality because I literally don’t have a set one.

I like music, bands and concerts so I guess getting some posters for my bedroom wall and getting some band shirts couldn’t hurt.
I also want to invest in some dumbbells so i can work out at home.
I’m looking at getting some more instruments again (I play acoustic guitar but I want to learn electric, I also play piano and drums. But all I own is an acoustic guitar at the moment).

I’m trying to get into baseball and hockey partly because i’m moving to canada permanently in a few months.

Does anybody else have any ideas? My mother keeps telling me to watch Star Wars, I’m wondering what else cis guys like.

Also does anyone have any tips or resources for masculine makeup especially guyliner for when i go to concerts.

My music taste switches a lot but I mainly LOVE NF, I liked One Direction as a kid, I like Alec Benjamin, Alex Sampson etc. but I stick to the same artists so I need some new recommendations.

Disclaimer: No, i’m not trying to change myself or my personality. I’m trying to build one. I never really knew who I was because I lived in my imagination as a kid 24/7 and when i started living in reality, I hated myself and everyone else bullied me so badly I just did what other people did and never learnt to do my own thing.

I vividly remember the episode when Jesse is about to move in with Becky and he’s comforting Michelle. I remember him saying “it’s only a 10 minute walk down the road and 2 seconds by Jet Plane”. But I just rewatched the episode 10 years later and didn’t hear or see that part of it. I’m wondering if anybody else remembers this?

I recently changed my first, middle, and surnames but i’m not sure how to actually get used to them and identify with them.

Does anybody have any tips?

I’ve been trying to change my surname for ages but nothing feels right!!

Ideally it needs to work with the name Samuel/Sam

I love names that have animals in them like Wolf, Fox or Lynx.

Preferably it would be a medium-long length name.

I like names that have a bit of meaning and I’m looking for light french roots or deeper canadian roots if possible.

I really would like a unique surname not something that super common but I also don’t want it to be cringey and just sound like I got it off a fantasy website.

Thank you in advance!

(also if you have any middle names that would be helpful too thank you)

Hey so just a disclaimer that some of what i’m about to say is obviously nowhere near as bad as what other people have gone through nor is it close to what my biological parents put me through.

For context, I was adopted by these people as a toddler and have no contact with previous guardians - I am now no longer living with them.

We’ll start with the ‘dad’. I saw a comment on TikTok the other day that said ‘I had a father, I didn’t have a father figure’ and that hit me hard. I have never felt close to him even as a child. I have always felt so trapped especially when I came out as transgender (FtM), I actually made an anonymous post on a different reddit account a few years back when I came out venting about their lack of acceptance and how I planned to move out as soon as I could - they read that because they found it while stalking me online and proceeded to guilt trip me into apologising.

When I came out, he didn’t even say anything and just went straight back to watching the television which hurt me. He never respected my name or pronouns and still doesn’t. He says he accepts me but I don’t believe you can accept someone without respecting them. When I changed my name (all parts), he got angry and said I was no longer his child and he didn’t want to speak to me again. I had tried to contact him around a week ago to speak about something and all I got was insulted and interrupted, I couldn’t even speak. After an hour of not being able to speak, I shouted over the phone the exact words ‘Will you just listen to me?’ and he hung up and blocked me. I haven’t spoken to him since nor do I ever plan to again.

I know if they find this post they’ll know it’s me and I will add updates as that progresses as they do.

Now onto the ‘mom’. While I have that natural attraction to want her to care for me and the traumatized part of my brain wants to see her as a parent; I wouldn’t say I love her. I used to but recently I don’t see the point.

I can’t even remember how it started to be honest but three days ago, I was speaking to her over a phone call as we usually do and she kept interrupting me which, naturally, made me angry. As soon as I called her out for it, I got a whole earful of ‘This is why you need therapy’, and ‘Sort this out yourself’ (the situation being the fact SHE abandoned me and kicked me out of her house a year ago and left me with abusive staff that I have to live with). I hadn’t said anything wrong and for three days I have been trying to reach out and get her to answer my calls to talk through the situation. As I said to her this morning: ‘You can’t expect an apology if you won’t speak to someone and all you’re doing by refusing to talk it out is bringing both of us down further’.

I have opened up on many occasions about my severe depression and how I can’t see a future more than 2 months from now. I’ve had depression for 8 years and I’ve received no help.

As for where I currently live:

I’m not allowed to leave the building at all.

I’m not allowed anything like scissors (even safety scissors) to continue my hobbies like knitting and crafting; nor am I allowed anything to continue sewing which I also enjoy.

They have been told and I keep telling them constantly NEVER to mention food around me as it will trigger my disordered eating and therefore I will not be able to physically eat for days - all they do is either come in every 5 minutes and ask what food I want OR they come in while I’m asleep (which I’ve also requested to stop) and leave random plates of food on the floor then proceed to complain at me the next morning for ‘the messy plates’.

Ive barely eaten properly for close to 2 months and even if I wanted to, there’s no healthy food in the house and leaving my room feels unsafe, unsanitary, and loud.

They talk constantly as well as purposely cough and clear their throats whenever they walk past my room (I only have a problem when it’s what they’re doing which is forcing it and laughing at me when it causes me pain). For context, I have severe tourette syndrome and those sounds trigger it and if I’m stressed enough, it can trigger seizures.

I’ve been refused my emergency inhaler on multiple life-threatening occasions, I’ve been refused endometriosis and PMS medication because ‘of the way I spoke to them’ (I calmly asked multiple times for a staff member to leave MY room because he was shouting and slammed the door into me causing multiple bruises).

I haven’t included much information on my soon-to-be ex-parents but to give you an idea:

- As a kid I’ve been chased up the stairs and even after surrendering and apologising I’ve had my legs slapped until they’re red raw

- I’ve been disowned by one person due to my choice in legally changing my name (which i plan to do again soon as they now know the name I chose and I feel unsafe with them knowing that information given how easy it is to track people).

- I’ve attempted to take my own life and I’ve harmed myself on many occasions due to the pressure and abuse I’ve been through.

- (They don’t know this one so if they read this I’ll be in big trouble:) I developed an alcohol dependency between the ages of 14-16 and I developed a nicotine dependency between the ages of 16-17 and I also gave in multiple times to other substances but never developed a dependency.

- I feel sick and tired of being told ‘This is why you need therapy’ yet the same person won’t pay for my therapy (due to legal name issues and the fact i can’t leave this room, i’m unable to get a job but if any of you know an online job id be able to do, that’d be fantastic)

- I’m literally starving to death and have lost my cats, the family it turned out I never had to begin with, my sense of identity, my trust in people, and my opportunities of college.

If you’ve read all of this, give me advice on your attention span lol.

Part of me tells me I’m overreacting but the other part says that situations are all different and it definitely feels like psychological abuse to me especially as I never realised it until the age of 15.

If you have any questions or would like more context, please ask. Any advice would be helpful as I’m not able to legally be independent of them for another year. Thank you Reddit!