I, Luna, iz singing at Grace's bar tonait. Dere will be catshee songs laik "everybody wants to be an cat" (obvisee) an "what's nu pusseecat". All da frens can sing along. Also I is sure Grace will be serving da tastiest churutinis an other drinks, laik always. I hope to see eberyone dere tonait.
Luna, faimus singer
As we all know, fren Oscar u/scabsfox iz da longest an haz da longes wiskuss. I fink, I mebbe haz da longes leg. Luk! Mine leg iz as long as mine hole bodee.
Yu also haz anee eggstra long bodee parts?
Francis, fren of snakk
Hi frens, A lot of frens said dey wud join me for meals if i wants. So now I haz an dindin pawtee, or brekki, or snakki. Juss come whenever yu want. Iz bring yus own bowl, if yu haz yur fabirite fud yu can bring it. If not, I also haz fud, mossly squishy wif chicken or fishie. I also haz spare bowls here if yu need. We can eet at da table or all ober da place ob course. All da frens invited.
Francis, fren of snakk
​
Hi frens, mine sisfur Luna went over da rainbow last week, an now i iz having dindin by mineself. Da hooman still does eyewater when dey gib onlee one bowl of fud. How much water is in an hooman? Shouldn't da eyewater be empty sometime?
I always do an starb song in front of fud room an get exite when fud come out. Sisfur Luna always came running when da bowls were put down an pushed me away to choose the one she wanted. So now I still wait when mine bowl is served. I iz not used to having fud by mineself yet an I also miss Luna a much.
Firs pickshur is me, Francis. Secund is Luna, herms is sitting on a soft cloud OTRB now. This herms hello OTRB careful is sad https://www.reddit.com/r/otrb/s/wo9yTMEJ7f
Francis, fren of snakk
Hi frens,
Dis morning I wasn't feeling well an had trouble breathing. So mine hooman rushed me to da pokey place. When da hoomans planned to do some dire gnosis, to see if its a treatable cause. I decided, I don't need da pokey lady's assistance an did an quick bridge crossing mineself. Dey still did an eggs ray an saw an tumor in mine lungs which probably ruptured. I had 17 gud years on erf. I lub sitting in mine bockses an crawling under da blankit, also doing dark time singing crimez. I also always made sure I get mine fud and treats firs by pushing my twice as heavy brofur Francis away.
Mine hooman is doing big sad an eyewater all day an gibing Francis eggstra treats an Francis gibs dem eggstra purrs an lap time snuggles.
Luna, faimus singer
Frens, dere haz been meny repawts on da hoomans doing an starb to frens. I haz also been victim to da starb. Da bowl was almoss emptee az yu can see. So I did an complain to mine hooman. Dey say "dere still fud in da bowl" NOT ENUFF OBVISLEE! An dey did not fill it up. Dis series of events call for akshin. We muss stand in sole daretee wif da frens doing an starb. By sharing ours fud an doing an reskoo of da fren when need. Also we muss pawtest! Togetha we can fight da hooman dumdumness. I haz helded dis speech at fren Olaf's pawtest on # Eggiforhoku:
"Frens, da mews iz ful ob disturb events. Firs Prince Hoku, hansum sunnovagun was starbed by denying Eggie. Den juss a short fureber later an other fren, Mikki was starb when hooman say dey had fud haff-our ago. We, da kitteh communetee can not take diz. Iz onlee matter of furebers untill each of us can fall viktim to an Starb. Dats why we muss protess before iz too late.
An starb to one of us is a starb to all!
We will not rest untell all da kitteh an different shape frens get da fud dey want! Stand in soly daretee wiff prins Hoku an awl de odder suffering from potia Controll or haff-our!"
Francis, fren of snakk
Da hooman putted down diz perfectly gud bocks an wanted to take it out for the re-cycling. But as soon as it touched da floor I did an fit an sit in da bocks. Iz great bocks, with hiding space an all. I will not be evicted! Diz bocks will not go to cycling!
​
Bockses wifout cats for cats wifout bockses!
​
Luna, faimus singer
Da litebocks made diner saw picshers wiff us. But ours hooman finds dem akshallee a bit skarree. Dum dum hooman, we's not really diner saws an da picshas don't luk laik us much.
Luna an Francis
Frens, ai is doing a big confoos. Da hooman sumtime comes out of fud room an have sooopa inzeresting smell on dems hands. Dey say is from cutting herbs for hooman fud. Dis parslee makes me want to do an rubrubrub an small bite allover da hand like nip does.
Today dere was another smell, interesting but not as good. I did an rub, but didn't really laik da smell.
Da hooman say iz DILL... But pikkul iz dill! Big dill! an da hand dit not smell like pikkul at all. Dey say on da hands iz da real dill an pikkul iz nipz.
So I iz doing big confooz. Iz da pikkul not da dill? Iz hooman lying? Iz nipz an dill da same? But why smell differen?
Soo many queshun. Can somecat tell me: what's da dill wif dat?
Picshur iz me trying an think outside da bocks.
Luna, faimus singer
Dis hoomans make moosik wif kitteh artist. While dis sound good (obvislee, is kitteh song) da hoomans are getting all da faim an da fren onlee get one spoon full of nomnom. All da inspiration for song comes from da oranj fren. Hims shud get all da faim an treats for da song.
Lunas, faimus singer
Frens, I had da weeredes dreem eva. I was doing an nap an mine timfoil hat slip off. Den I was dreeming dat Luna an me was flying out da window into da sky. We had an fun vacation, somefing was weerd about it. Now dat I wake up it feels, da nap was elebenty billion furebers long. Da supa weerd fing is: Luna meow, dat she had da same dreem.
Did we miss anyfing here?
Francis, master of naps
Hello fellow kittehs, Iz me, Francis. I iz normal kitteh. So iz Luna. Accusashin, dat Luna was acting weird were wrong. Hermz sing da song of ours people (kitteh).
Aliumz don't exist. Take off da tinfoil hats an open your mind to fresh thoughts. Tinfoil hat iz bad for yu. Take dem off now. Faraday cage hat is bad for yu. Take it off now.
Thanks for yuz atrenshin,
Francis, Kitteh not Alium
I iz doing a save wif da hat. But i iz doing a big concern about Luna, hermz seem different dan usall. What do I do? I iz a bit scared. Don't tell hermz I asked.
Francis, master of naps.
Frens, mine hooman is soo Dumdum. I likes da lap time when dey is sitting at da litebocks table. When I get on da lap i usually follow dese steps:
1.sit on da table firs, den put one paw on da lap for two furebers. I put all mine weight on dat paw, to test the stability of da lap. Da hooman is not allowed to move in that time. When i has maded sure, the lap is save to step on, the nex step is
But sometimes da hooman will do an complain, when i put all da weight on one paw. Dey will say iz too heavy. Eckskuse me? I iz lorge stronk gentlecatto. I iz heavy, but not too heavy. An den sometime de outrayyge happen: Dey gib me an PUSH, so i walk on the lap wifout kompleting step 1 an 2. I still get onna lap an cuddle, but it iz different when not doing it rite. Picshers is me doing an skrem for justhiss.
What are mine legal opshins on dat matta?
Francis, fren of snakk an master of naps