u/Full-Pea-859

Close to a diagnosis and thinking about my options. I’m only 31 and the thought of being on drops the rest of my life sounds awful.

I’m 31 years old and close to a glaucoma diagnosis. I’m researching treatment options as there’s already damage to both of my optic nerves and I’ve heard the drops can cause redness and irritation. Are there any that don’t do this?

I’m scared and need to vent and I also have a few questions. For reference I’m Canadian.

I went for a regular eye check up at an optometrist’s and they found the pressures in my eyes are high. They sent me to an ophthalmologist and I’ve seen him 3 times now and every visit he’s tested my pressures by physically putting something on my eye so it’s more accurate and it’s always either at the highest number for “normal” or a bit above normal. There’s also damage being done to both of my optic nerves. If I hadn’t gone for my check up I would never have known because my vision is good and I don’t need glasses. But I’m only 31 and I’m scared. Sounds like next time I see him if it’s high I’ll be diagnosed with glaucoma. I have a 2 and a 4 year old and the thought of not being able to see them one day rips my heart apart.

I would rather do a laser option than use the eye drops. He has an SLT laser in his office to treat glaucoma but he’s said because my eyes are small and I struggle so much not to blink while he’s testing my pressures the laser would be very difficult and that it is uncomfortable. He mentioned a DSLT laser which takes 2 seconds vs 2 minutes with the SLT and it’s not painful. According to him there’s no DSLT lasers in Canada and I would need to go to America to have it done there. I am open to this option but obviously I need to find out a lot more first. Has anyone done the SLT or DSLT and can speak about their experience? Where did you have it done? Any side effects? Other treatment options?

I am completely open to any and all information anybody has. I don’t know anything about glaucoma or the treatments outside of what my ophthalmologist has told me but I want to educate myself while I still have some time. I’ll be seeing him
again in 6 months.

Thank you so much in advance

My 4 year old only poops once every 2 days, occasionally every 3rd day. The goal is to have him poop once a day. He ate prunes in the morning for about a week now refuses. I tried prune juice. Tried it but didn’t like. I need more ideas!

Considering staying at Harrison hot springs resort in late August for a night as a getaway for my husband and i’s anniversary. I’ve heard negative things about it though, like it’s not kept well. Are we talking about bed bugs and mold type thing or just outdated stuff? Because I’m not picky and don’t need everything to be fancy. I just want a nice night with him kid free and enjoy the pools that they have.

My son’s birthday (and mine) are right in the middle of December. This year he will be turning 5. All of his past birthday parties I’ve scheduled them for beginning of December but this year I will need to schedule it either last weekend of November or a couple days before his birthday.

The reason I’ve been doing his parties so early is because I’m always afraid of getting one of us sick (we are a family of 4 including a 2 year old) and not being able to enjoy Christmas. My dad also has COPD so I worry about him catching something from all of the kids and people being in an enclosed space and him catching something and not being ok for Christmas. I cherish Christmas so much and I don’t always know how many Christmas’ I have with my parents because they are a bit older. People also usually have lots of Christmas events to attend to it’s nice to have the birthday party before they all start up.

I’m also a mid-December baby but I think my parents just did my parties within a few days of my birthday. I just don’t know if it’s weird of me to be doing his parties so early? I don’t know if my son is going to start thinking it’s weird as he gets older and question it. Of course we try to make his actual birthday special still. Am I the only December baby parent that thinks this way?

I’m looking for a new video monitor for my kids rooms but I hate the clicking sound the cameras make when night vision is turned on or off. Are there any baby monitors that have a setting to keep the night vision on even when the light is on in their room?

Thanks!

My daughter turned 2 a few months ago. She is a super smart, loving little girl. She’s had a cold for about a week, but mainly just snottiness now and some tiredness. Whenever she’s over tired or doesn’t feel good, she can become very difficult. She’s does this thing where she suddenly gets worked up, almost like a tantrum or just a freak out, and needs to be on me, pushing her legs or arms into me, and screams into my face. She’s almost inconsolable during these tantrums. Food (even sugary foods most times), play-doh, kinetic sand, crafts, twirling her around or going upside down, etc usually don’t work. Depending on how worked up she is. These tantrums can last 5 to over 30 minutes. The only thing that almost always works is tv and of course I feel guilty putting the tv on every time she’s upset. The other day she stopped immediately when my husband put some watermelon in front of her despite us offering other food before.

But yesterday just got me. She’s been screaming into my face every day for the last few days, Ive been sick and haven’t been feeling good, I have health anxiety around being sick and it’s been triggered the last couple weeks, we are going on a trip in a few days so my brain is loaded with an endless to do list and my sister in law snapped at me the other day. Not excuse for how I behaved but they played a role. Oh, and my period started 20 minutes after I lost it yesterday.

But here’s the specifics of what happened. She suddenly started screaming and would not stop when I had to put her down after being on the couch together because I felt sick and needed to go to the bathroom. Her screaming went on for at least 20 minutes. I tried sitting on the floor with her and just being calm and present. In the past that has helped. But not this time. I saw no end coming. I tried laying on the floor to maybe feel more inviting to her? I tried stickers, etc etc. I couldn’t take it anymore so I turned the tv on. But she still kept going. And wouldn’t stop. My ears hurt. I felt sick. The whole house was a complete mess. I tried to stay calm but the scream just came out. I think she cried for another few minutes after I broke down crying but I was able to put her on the couch. I went around the corner into the kitchen, sat on the floor and sobbed. Not cried. I sobbed. I knew I wasn’t being quiet but I couldn’t hold it in. My poor 4 year old son came over, usually he’s glued to the tv, but he came and gave me a big hug and the look on his face when he saw me completely broken makes me so sad.

I probably traumatized them. I may have created a really shitty core memory for my son. I absolutely failed. I’m seeing a counsellor for frustration in motherhood but I think I need to see her more. I talked about it with my daughter this morning. I said “mama was sad yesterday right?” She said “yeah on the floor” (me crying on the floor). I said “were you scared when I screamed? She said yes. I said I’m sorry, mamas get mad and sad sometimes, and said I love you and gave her a hug. I talked about it with my son yesterday too. He’s too young to be emotionally supporting me. I will never expect that from my children.

My daughter sleeps great but last night I heard her whine a few times and I knew she was unsettled. She took forever to fall asleep for naptime yesterday because of my outburst. I usually fall asleep pretty quick but it took me over 2 hours to fall asleep last night. My son got frustrated this morning and screamed (usually he’s more calm so I know his scream was because of yesterday) and my daughter was playing with a Little People and said “I’m sad” and my character said to hers, “because (son) screamed?” She said “yeah, I want a hug” so our characters hugged. She said “I’m happy now” after but I know that was because of me.

I feel like a piece of shit mom. I’m a stay at home mom. My life isn’t even that hard. My mental health just sucks half the time and I hate that my children are the victim of that. I have such a weight on my heart now. I just want to keep my fucking shit together and be a good, happy mom.

Edit: you guys have made me feel so validated. Thank you for the real examples of how you’ve also hit your breaking points and that I haven’t completely ruined my kids. I’m very glad I posted this. I appreciate all the comments ❤️ I’ll keep trying my best and lean more into my counsellor

My daughter turned 2 a few months ago. She is a super smart, loving little girl. She’s had a cold for about a week, but mainly just snottiness now and some tiredness. Whenever she’s over tired or doesn’t feel good, she can become very difficult. She’s does this thing where she suddenly gets worked up, almost like a tantrum or just a freak out, and needs to be on me, pushing her legs or arms into me, and screams into my face. She’s almost inconsolable during these tantrums. Food (even sugary foods most times), play-doh, kinetic sand, crafts, twirling her around or going upside down, etc usually don’t work. Depending on how worked up she is. These tantrums can last 5 to over 30 minutes. The only thing that almost always works is tv and of course I feel guilty putting the tv on every time she’s upset. The other day she stopped immediately when my husband put some watermelon in front of her despite us offering other food before.

But yesterday just got me. She’s been screaming into my face every day for the last few days, Ive been sick and haven’t been feeling good, I have health anxiety around being sick and it’s been triggered the last couple weeks, we are going on a trip in a few days so my brain is loaded with an endless to do list and my sister in law snapped at me the other day. Not excuse for how I behaved but they played a role. Oh, and my period started 20 minutes after I lost it yesterday.

But here’s the specifics of what happened. She suddenly started screaming and would not stop when I had to put her down after being on the couch together because I felt sick and needed to go to the bathroom. Her screaming went on for at least 20 minutes. I tried sitting on the floor with her and just being calm and present. In the past that has helped. But not this time. I saw no end coming. I tried laying on the floor to maybe feel more inviting to her? I tried stickers, etc etc. I couldn’t take it anymore so I turned the tv on. But she still kept going. And wouldn’t stop. My ears hurt. I felt sick. The whole house was a complete mess. I tried to stay calm but the scream just came out. I think she cried for another few minutes after I broke down crying but I was able to put her on the couch. I went around the corner into the kitchen, sat on the floor and sobbed. Not cried. I sobbed. I knew I wasn’t being quiet but I couldn’t hold it in. My poor 4 year old son came over, usually he’s glued to the tv, but he came and gave me a big hug and the look on his face when he saw me completely broken makes me so sad.

I probably traumatized them. I may have created a really shitty core memory for my son. I absolutely failed. I’m seeing a counsellor for frustration in motherhood but I think I need to see her more. I talked about it with my daughter this morning. I said “mama was sad yesterday right?” She said “yeah on the floor” (me crying on the floor). I said “were you scared when I screamed? She said yes. I said I’m sorry, mamas get mad and sad sometimes, and said I love you and gave her a hug. I talked about it with my son yesterday too. He’s too young to be emotionally supporting me. I will never expect that from my children.

My daughter sleeps great but last night I heard her whine a few times and I knew she was unsettled. She took forever to fall asleep for naptime yesterday because of my outburst. I usually fall asleep pretty quick but it took me over 2 hours to fall asleep last night. My son got frustrated this morning and screamed (usually he’s more calm so I know his scream was because of yesterday) and my daughter was playing with a Little People and said “I’m sad” and my character said to hers, “because (son) screamed?” She said “yeah, I want a hug” so our characters hugged. She said “I’m happy now” after but I know that was because of me.

I feel like a piece of shit mom. I’m a stay at home mom. My life isn’t even that hard. My mental health just sucks half the time and I hate that my children are the victim of that. I have such a weight on my heart now. I just want to keep my fucking shit together and be a good, happy mom.

We are going to penticton for a 5 day stay in a couple weeks with our 4 and 2 year old. I’ve been googling to find good, kid friendly places to eat, best beach spots and kid entertainment but figured I would ask here too.

Are there any restaurants with a grassy patch for the kids to run around on near our table, or a playground type thing?

Any fast food type places right on the beach?

Best beach areas with kids?

Any entertainment type things on going soon? Can also be indoor since we might want to escape the heat for a bit. I’m aware of roll n stones entertainment centre and the indoor swimming pool!
We will also be going to tickle berry’s ice cream

Anywhere else worth looking into? Open to all ideas!

Thanks so much!

Has anyone else’s potty training taken over 2 years?

My son is 4.5. We started potty training right after he turned 2. Looking back he was too young and not ready but I was inexperienced and fell for the fear mongering in the “Oh Crap” potty training book.

In the beginning when he had no pants or underwear on he would go to the potty right away and do amazing. But once he has something on he does not care if they’re wet. In the beginning it took months before I felt confident enough to put underwear on under his pants. He still will rarely tell me when we’re out if he has to pee. And when he does tell me he’s already gone in his pants a bit and needs to go immediately. Sometimes it’s VERY obvious he has to go pee and when we ask if he has to go he says no then ends up a bit wet before he bolts it for the bathroom or we’re telling him to go. It’s been a road of so many ups and downs but the main issue is he simply does not care if he’s wet. Still 2.5 years later. Sometimes when I know he’s wet I’ll ask him if he’s dry or wet, he says dry, and sure enough when I check he’s wet.

We just came back from a 3 night camping trip and he wet his pants a few times on the trip and has been a nightmare the last 5 days we’ve been home. The biggest thing that bothers me now is that I’ve been telling him, every day, multiple times a day, for months, to put down the seat and flush when he’s done peeing in the toilet. Just now I told him to put the seat down on the downstairs toilet. His underwear was a bit too wet so I tell him to go upstairs and change himself. He just went upstairs, peed in the upstairs toilet, but left the seat up and didn’t flush even though I told him 2 minutes ago to do that in the downstairs bathroom.

It is very hard to not get frustrated. He’s been at home with me but in a couple months he’s going to preschool and I want to see improvements. I have to try so hard not to yell. Yes he’s had periods where he’s been fairly good but the regressions makes me feel like I’m failing. My 2 other friends kids who are 2 have potty trained themselves and say they have to go pee when they’re playing together. My 4.5 year old is STILL struggling.

Edit: don’t even get me started on night time stuff. He’s in a pull up every night. By the morning it’s heavy and wet. Maybe partly my fault by not restricting his fluids a ton before bed but I think it will be a LONG time before he’s dry at night

Am I the only one? I hate this feeling and I hate being frustrated with him so often.

My son is 4.5. We started potty training right after he turned 2. Looking back he was too young and not ready but I was inexperienced and fell for the fear mongering in the “Oh Crap” potty training book.

In the beginning when he had no pants or underwear on he would go to the potty right away and do amazing. But once he has something on he does not care if they’re wet. In the beginning it took months before I felt confident enough to put underwear on under his pants. He still will rarely tell me when we’re out if he has to pee. And when he does tell me he’s already gone in his pants a bit and needs to go immediately. Sometimes it’s VERY obvious he has to go pee and when we ask if he has to go he says no then ends up a bit wet before he bolts it for the bathroom or we’re telling him to go. It’s been a road of so many ups and downs but the main issue is he simply does not care if he’s wet. Still 2.5 years later. Sometimes when I know he’s wet I’ll ask him if he’s dry or wet, he says dry, and sure enough when I check he’s wet.

We just came back from a 3 night camping trip and he wet his pants a few times on the trip and has been a nightmare the last 5 days we’ve been home. The biggest thing that bothers me now is that I’ve been telling him, every day, multiple times a day, for months, to put down the seat and flush when he’s done peeing in the toilet. Just now I told him to put the seat down on the downstairs toilet. His underwear was a bit too wet so I tell him to go upstairs and change himself. He just went upstairs, peed in the upstairs toilet, but left the seat up and didn’t flush even though I told him 2 minutes ago to do that in the downstairs bathroom.

Edit: don’t even get me started on night time stuff. He’s in a pull up every night. By the morning it’s heavy and wet. Maybe partly my fault by not restricting his fluids a ton before bed but I think it will be a LONG time before he’s dry at night

It is very hard to not get frustrated. He’s been at home with me but in a couple months he’s going to preschool and I want to see improvements. I have to try so hard not to yell. Yes he’s had periods where he’s been fairly good but the regressions makes me feel like I’m failing. My 2 other friends kids who are 2 have potty trained themselves and say they have to go pee when they’re playing together. My 4.5 year old is STILL struggling.

Am I the only one? I hate this feeling and I hate being frustrated with him so often.

2nd edit: I wish I had posted this sooner. I feel so validated and not like a complete failure. Also some great tips in here. Thank you everyone

My son starts preschool in September so I want to get him a fun book to maybe help put him at ease and affirm his emotions. Any recommendations??

Hi there. I have a 4 year old boy who has always been high sleep needs. The last few weeks he’s been waking earlier around 6am instead of his usually 6:45-7:15ish wake time. He goes to bed at 7:45. He’s been very very tired since waking early.

I’ve made his room pretty much pitch black, put a wash cloth over his ok to wake clock so he can still see the color but it’s not lighting up the room as much, been giving him warm milk before bed, removed a blanket so he’s not too hot, given him a softer pillow, tried a nap a yesterday but he didn’t sleep, and turned up his sound machine a bit. He’s pretty sensitive to the sounds of my husband (also his dad) getting up and getting ready for work in the morning (yes I’ve stressed to him so much that he needs to stfu lol).

We have put him to bed a bit earlier when we can but it doesn’t seem to help a ton and it’s hard because our daughter (2 y/o) goes to bed at 7:45 every day, earlier doesn’t work for her so the sound of us putting her down in her room right next to his room keeps him up even though we try to be super quiet. I think we might have to try even earlier.

I think my son’s sleep needs have decreased a bit but he’s still not getting quite as much as he needs. No major changes in our life recently. Has anyone had their ~4 year old do this? Is it a growth spurt? Developmental leap? Tips to help him? I’m so tired of seeing him so tired and just want to help him.