u/Good-Grief-Chief

Im having a window of clarity right now but it’s bad. My impulse control has completely vanished, im making HORRIBLE decisions and could potentially ruin my life if I continue.

I was in the process of getting a diagnosis back in 2019. I had a therapist for over a year (the longest I ever with a therapist) and she said I check all of the bipolar disorder and we were talking about medication when I lost my insurance.

I’m broke. The only coping mechanism I have is weed and it’s failing me. I don’t know what to do.

This isn’t even the first time he’s said that to me. I know you want me to break up with him you’ve already made that clear. You’re probably right.

Sometimes I feel like I deserve it. I hurt him a few years ago pretty badly and he forgave me and decided to stay. Things were good for a while after that. Until they weren’t.

At what point will I have repaid my debt?

We had another argument today. It ended with him yelling at me, screaming about how he hated me and he wish he never would’ve moved in with me.

We’re 13 years into this relationship. Just moved into this new house, and things have been stressful. Things were stressful before we moved, but moving Just made everything worse.

We’ve had problems in the past and we both considered breaking up with each other at various points in our relationship, but we worked through those problems and now we’re here again.

I can feel it coming. I just don’t know how much longer it’s going to take.

You are the worst boss I’ve ever had. I’ve never thought of you as a friend, I could never be friends with someone as racist, sexist, and arrogant as you.

You’re so fucking full of yourself, it’s disgusting. If I’m not worshipping the ground you walk on I’m being “insubordinate” 🙄

I haven’t even talked about the gross stuff yet. Dude you’re disgusting. We work in a medical environment. We come in contact with BODY FLUIDS and I’ve seen you wash your hands once maybe twice in the 2 years I’ve worked with you. Ive seen you work BARE HANDED around these bodily fluids, not wash your hands, and EAT AFTERWARDS 🤮

You’re goddamn 50yrs old you know better.

Evil nasty man.

I know you’re going to blame me for the mess you made yesterday. Because it’s my fucking fault of if I don’t clean up after you like your Slave bitch. Someday I won’t need this place. This was always just a stepping stone to something better and I’m about to step the fuck out of this shit.