u/Grapeloser

(I literally just recovered from the worst meltdown of my life so forgive me if this is worded poorly)

So today I was at my brothers graduation and I had to wake up stupidly early to get there. It’s in the middle of a busy city centre and I was driven by my dad to get there (I love my dad but he is a very easily angered man and that can stress me out sometimes)

It is BOILING hot outside and there’s no AC in the hall where the graduation is taking place and I’ve never been to the city centre where my brothers uni is so I’m an an unfamiliar environment.

We finish the graduation and I’m holding it together but we have time to kill before dinner so we decide to go shopping.

By this point it’s around 2 o’clock and I’ve been up since 7 and I went to bed at 11 and the fatigue is really starting to kick in(I really need at least 10 hours of sleep to function not including time spent lying in bed in the morning).

A lot of walking later we decided to go to a pub but it’s SUPER busy and I really don’t cope well with crowds and especially in dark enclosed noisy spaces and I just completely break.

I start crying and having a meltdown but internally I feel like I’m taking the spotlight away from my brother on his day which is why I held it in for so long making the meltdown worse. AND my family starts to fuss over me which I hate but I’m completely non verbal so I can’t communicate only making the situation worse.

I eventually get my voice back and scream that I wanna go home and my dad begrudgingly agrees to take me home but he isn’t happy about it and in the car he just complains to me about how he’s missing out on the fun and how annoying it is to drive 1 hour home just for me to do nothing but cry and sleep.

I just wanted to know if I’m valid for going home because my dad is kinda pissed at me and I think my mum is really worried about me and now she’s not going to have a good time and I just feel really guilty that I’ve ruined my brothers graduation when today should be about him.

I can give more details in the replies if you want

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Is there any advice or something I need to be doing to go faster because my current average is like 2 minutes (with occasional word checks so I might be cheating as well)

I was considering buying a HBO Max subscription to binge watch the show (I know piracy is a thing but I used to do that and got a virus so im traumatised) but I heard that its heavily censored in the UK.

I was just wondering is it THAT bad to the point the show is unwatchable or will my watching experience be basically the same as it would be normally (Ive never watched the show the whole way through before so I dont really have a refrence point)

People love Bees and think they’re amazing pollinators who can do no wrong but when it comes to there bald counterparts people are terrified of them and think they’re aggressive and dangerous. I get that they sting but I think there about as aggressive as bees just leave them alone like most people do with bees