u/Hot_Relative_110

Personally I’d bring in just two artists and their music; DJ Shadow and Devon Hendryx, more because of tapes like Endtroducing… and The Ghost~Pop Tape. Both have a lot of songs that would fit really well and I’d like to make som visualizes with some of their music over some NGE type stuff, what about you guys

I was on the phone with my girlfriend who kept admonishing me for not speaking out and reaching out for more help. I’ve got a father who keeps wondering if I’m doing okay since I seem so off lately. But all that circles my mind is “how do I tell them.“

How do I tell them that I know their love is conditional, but that I keep it with me because they’re all that I have and my entire world.

How do I tell them about these envious thoughts I always have about other trans women.

How do I tell them that I feel like I’ve always taken the path of least resistance, walking wide and fronting, just to realize to myself that I’m fooling nobody?

How do I tell them that the man I’m becoming is nothing like the person I wish I could be, because I know my girlfriend would rather leave and that my father thinks it’s all escapism.

How can I tell them about the relief I’ve felt thinking about transitioning later in life?

How can I tell them that I’m still uncertain about it all because it’s not like there’s any diagnosis; that I wish desperately to have gotten some sort of diagnosis so that people would see that what I feel isn’t complete and utter horseshit

I don’t know anymore

I’m sure that Detroit is much more expensive than anywhere else in Michigan, seeing how it’s literally Detroit and all. But I want to get into a skilled trade where the apprenticeship starts off at $18.69/hr and ends off at about $27.18/hr within three years. Apparently by becoming a low-voltage technician I can be making about $33 bucks an hour, some say $42, and I want to look at making music on the side; is this doable for Detroit?

Another debate was just held, and I’d like to hear everyone’s thoughts because I’ve got plenty

Ive been bumping LOTS of more industrial, rave type, or just flat out loud music recently and need more recs, so far my fav projects have been man bites dog by femtanyl and jenny death by death grips, any recs?

Ive wanted to elaborate on this for a while because people don’t seem to get what I mean when I say this. i don’t agree with the typical left critique of Post-Mao China as a state capitalist society mainly because the arguments in favor of referring to it as such are questionable at best, and completely leave out elements such as the Worker’s Congresses and the fact that agriculture is largely held collectively depending on townships, and run by individual families from what I have read. But socialism is nowhere near a fitting label for the following reasons;

1. China’s commitment to “harmony.” I’m referring to policies like Hu Jintao’s Scientific Outlook on Development as evidence of this and one of the core reasons why China is corporatist in my eyes. What Hu said was that economic growth should be balanced with humanist values and social welfare, which would bring them towards what he elaborated as being a “harmonious society.” It’s been integrated quite a lot into Xi Jinping Thought from what I can tell, and China has sure as hell followed through with this policy of balancing a controlled private sector with mitigating growing economic inequality and unrest. Or would that not just be reconciling class struggle? That’s exactly what it is, and praise it all you want, it doesn’t make it socialist and shouldn’t be regarded as a successful example of socialism.

2. The SASAC. This is the state body responsible for China’s state-owned enterprises, which are split into various different enterprises depending on the sector or industry. So like the State Power Investment Corporation, Electronic Corporation, Telecommunication Corporation, you get the deal. This is the same kind of blueprint various Fascist states have had, in which corporatism was one of its commanding pillars; this isn’t to call China Fascist by any stretch whatsoever, but the parallels between this and documents like the Labor Charter of 1927 and the Charter of Carnaro are worth noting. Of course, plenty will make the argument that the Worker’s Congresses are proof of a socialist mode of production, since they’re integrated within SOEs and private sector firms. But this just leads me to my next point.

3. The mere existence of the Worker’s Congresses. Sure, you install a built in union within every state-owned enterprise to make sure that the have a say in management despite more top-down management. You make sure that the power of the private enterprise is kept in check by this built in union. This is how you harmonize, democratize, and reconcile the worker’s struggle with necessary private enterprise. Do I have to say more? The only thing I haven’t seen them do is call themselves “producers” instead of workers and managers, but aside from that they share a lot of parallels with the corporatist lies of the past.

You can admire China for their noticeable anti-capitalist attitude, or more accurately anti-Western attitude, and you can respect their dedication to “controlled“ capitalism. That just means that Norway would also be an appealing example of what socialism looks like to you.

I’ve largely come to terms with the idea of being transfem, but in the midst of all this second guessing and a feeling of despair/isolation, I‘ve started to notice small bits of euphoria showing up out of nowhere.

For example, once I had been swearing a pretty baggy shirt with some really short shorts and despite my leg hair, I kinda felt like a girl. Or maybe I’d noticed how much my hair has grown out and realize that’s pretty fem.

I’ve also got a really weird (but apparently common) tendency to have certain reactions that are probably euphoria, like certain parts of my body reacting to seeing me in girl clothes, and this is seemingly kinda frequent though I havent shaved or even cross dressed in a LONG time since I’d been out shopping and went off alone.

Idk if this confirms anything even more but maybe

I’m done getting everyone’s consent before I live my life. I’ve always wondered when I can let myself be adorable, be something much more beautiful, be me, and that day is today.

I’m a girl. In spite of it all, I’m a girl and my name is Mia. In spite of my younger age, in spite of how I look, in spite of those around me, I am Mia.

I just hope that I can be okay with that myself, that all the self-doubt can wither away, and that I can finally start becoming Mia.

Ive got zero intention of staying with my parents for much longer than I have to. As soon as I get out of high school, I want to move from California to a place like Portland or Minneapolis, because those places are solidly accepting and affordable.

Still though, they’re drastically affecting how I go about evaluating myself and what I want to do in life. I’ve taken an interest in hormones when I’m of age and have a union job that can cover that, but I’d have to hide as much as I can from my parents because how else can I explain this to them? How can I ever explain to my father who’s raised me as a man that I’m a girl? How can I explain to my mother that the man she gave birth to is a girl? How can I ever explain to my little sister that her big brother is a girl? Hell, I’ve got two very transphobic brothers, and entire family of relatives I know wouldn’t have any clue what to do about my transition; what the hell do I even do?

And then there’s the flip side of this; why am I going to keep putting myself last for these people? I’ve given up on my emotional health, on logic, on actual educational opportunities, and now all I want to do is prepare for a skilled trade so that I can have some years to myself without the stress of college. I‘m realizing that I’ve become a shell of a man trying to please everyone, trying to be the “strong” and lovable man even when it just feels like one big practical joke. I don’t know how to explain all the times that I’ve looked into the mirror and sworn that I saw a girl. I dont know how to explain what I felt on weed or with little things like the GTA character without getting dismissed. I don’t know how I can explain that all my life I’ve wanted to be someone softer and cute and adorable, that I can’t fucking stand the thought of having to preform any longer, that I envy other trans women so much and that I just don’t wanna be me anymore. And I’ll be damned if I had to act like fucking Blair White just for people to see that what I’m feeling isn’t just bullshit made in a lab and engineered into my brain or whatever the fuck my family thinks. Fucking crazy asses. I’m only 16, I don’t want to have to worry about this bullshit but how can I not.

This has been something that has bothered me (16) for a while now, and I have no idea what to make of it, because there’s not much clarity I can gain getting high before i’m even 18.

When I was 14 (yes, I was an idiot), I had gotten hooked on weed through my friends. Vaped when I was sad, vaped when Trump beat Harris, vaped just to vape. At one point, me and my little sister had to stay with my grandma who lived much closer to the school. I’d already been questioning my gender for a while, going as far as crossdressing online for a bit (I was an utter mess), but for the entire week that I stayed with her, I’d wake up every morning just… blank. Not really feeling anything but numbness and a light misery. But I’d hit the vape and all of a sudden, I don’t feel as happy as I would before, I’d just feel extremely fem/dysphoric and had no idea what to do with it. Like I’m not sure if It was because it was a muha, which is 80-90% THC so obviously my brain is going to go haywire, but I remembered it randomly and idfk

16 and never did learn to love myself because there was always something missing. a sort of grime i couldn’t wash off my face, almost. i realize now that what i was feeling, that softness id wanted to erase through sheer strength and rage, likely was dysphoria. and the more i realize it, the farther i spiral. I can’t believe this could be me, that all this time i might have wanted to be a girl, and now that i see how much everyone around me prevents me from doing anything about it, i cant help but die a little bit more inside. the envy I’ve had for trans women has only gotten worse and I barely have the will to live without so much as a fucking meat sack to talk to. at my wits end, its not just comfort i want. i want to finally fall in love with myself

hey yall i’m going to be starting a talk show about left-wing politics in general, i’m an anarchist so slight bias, I’m keeping it largely anonymous but I wanted some input as to what I should be talking about from yall.

So far I want to address the following:

- What Anarchism Is

- The Genocide Against Black America

- other more cultural/music based topics (it’s not strictly politics, that might be boring)

all input is welcome and I hope to hear from yall :]

Hello y’all, I am 16 years old and I intend on becoming a low voltage technician for IBEW, focusing on things like sound & comm. I am relatively new to the field and as such would like to gain some knowledge and hands on experience in the field to be a more viable applicant since I know IBEW is competitive. With that in mind, since I live close to a community college here in SJ County (CA) that offers dual-enrollments via my high school, I have tried to apply for such a program, but it doesn’t look like the necessary courses like ELEC 30, 29B or 11 are available for the time being. I’d also chosen some classes that don’t seem to really fit my CTE priorities (Physics, already took Algebra 1 in my freshman year), so I’ve looked at getting into an ROP over the summer or an extracurricular during my junior year, if not both. My question is, is there anything else I can do to gain more experience and make myself a more viable candidate?