How to ask this question?
My husband and I have been invited to the wedding of the daughter of his best friend. We've been hearing about the wedding planning and how "badly" it's been going for months. Long story short, but the daughter wanted a small wedding of immediate family (which would mean that friends like us would not be invited (and my husband and I were fine with that)), and the wife overruled that because she wants her and her husband to be able to invite all of their friends. I think they're up to 200 guests.
I'll spare you all the details of the disagreements between mother and daughter, which have been many, but, long story short, the daughter picked a very picturesque church out in the sticks (for the best outdoor pictures, so let's all pray for sun that day) and the mother picked the swankiest reception spot in town. The wedding is at 12:00 (mass with communion) and the reception is at 6:00. That leaves a fair amount of time for the guests to have to kill before the reception starts.
I have not heard anything about the family having anything for the guests in that interim period (we've been to family weddings where someone has a casual open house in between). My husband and I live halfway between the two locations and have been thinking about inviting some of the guests (i.e., mutual friends who we've known for years) to stop off at our house in between the ceremony and reception. We would have light refreshments, and we would all just hang out and chat for a couple of hours until time to head to the reception. Heaven knows, if there's nothing else planned, my husband will definitely go home for a while.
Is it ok to ask the parents if anything has been planned for the guests between the ceremony and reception? If so, should I tell the parents what I'm thinking about? It's clear that the wedding planning has been extremely tense and I don't want to upset anyone, but the alternative for some of our friends is to drive to their homes and almost immediately turn around to drive to the reception.