u/JessamineGeorge

I'm sick of christmas,same routine every year.

After dinner i'm sent to the attic for board games for the family,talk about a trivial pursuit.

Confusion last month at the Trump-Xi summit.

It has been revealed that Donald arrived at the chinese chip negotiation bearing dips.

My brother's extreme OCD is a daily struggle and i support him all the way with it.

Looking on the bright side,i may well be the owner of the cleanest Toyota in the western world.

My wife insists on everything in the house being from the 1970's.

She wears the bell bottom trousers in our relationship.

Just to be clear,we have decided to take legal action regarding these star wars puns.

Regards,M.Pire.

My friend turned his split personality into his superpower and changed his name to 'Lex Luthor Vandross'.

Now he's not only a very good soul singer,but also the greatest criminal mind of our time.

I had tickets to see the Glen Miller tribute orchestra at Carnegie hall.

Didn't go in the end,i just wasn't in the mood.

Just finished the daily dog walk,a couple of poops and many pees..not much from the dog though.

I have to say i was relieved to get to the end of dry january.

I was getting sick of sherry.

Got to hand it to Nicola,with all that's happened she still found it within herself to return a favour and send Peter a gift in prison.knowing his love for exploring the prairees in a motorhome,tonight he receives a small lassoo.

The owners of Ben and Jerry's,in their wisdom have adapted two of their bestsellers to celebrate the trans movement..the strawberry,they added nuts..and the pistachio they removed the nuts altogether.

I love it when i discover a new geographical fact.for example,Sweden has 267000 islands..mainly uninhabited..267000!..boy,Jeffrey missed a trick there didn't he,called himself a business man?..even donald's mask would have slipped pitched those numbers..not that i would want to be known as the man who supplied that financial advice!

My speed date asked me to describe myself in one sentence.

Me-'l'm a man for all seasons'.

Her-'like Paul Scofield in that movie?'.

Me-'No,i work for MacCormick'.

Here at the corrective plastic surgery center we are

inundated.we use humour to get through.today a client came in with hung up eyelids,cheeks that were borderline frozen which caused her great difficulty expressing herself.

Her case profile has been titled 'Madonna'.

Confusion tonight at the Trump-Xi summit when the president turned up at the chinese chip makers negotiation bearing dips.

Confusion tonight at the Trump-Xi summit after the president arrived at the chinese chip makers negotiation bearing dips.

Confusion tonight at the Trump-Xi summit after the president arrived at the chinese chip makers negotiation bearing dips.

I had front row tickets to see the BBC symphony orchestra Glenn Miller tribute evening at Carnegie Hall.

I didn't go in the end,i just wasnt in the mood.

I'm a big fan of irony.Did you know that due to local logistics,Amazon experience great difficulty delivering to the rainforest!.

I hope the local boat betwork are price pointing accordingly.Fight the power.🙂