u/Jude_the_obscurest

This more of a "what do you think?" Post, not really looking for a definitive answer, I dont think there is one. People often say "it's not your loved one, its the disease" when the loved one does something out of character. Ive also read that as the brain changes, societal norms fall away, leading to people acting inappropriately. So it gets me thinking - if someone with dementia, especially in the earlier stages, does something that would normally be out of character, is it because they just dont have the inner voice telling them not to do it, or is it something that never would have occurred to them? I'm thinking internet girlfriends, gambling, making an expensive purchase of something they don't need, things like that. Obviously if they are having hallucinations that would change behavior in a different way, and if they have incontinence thats a physical issue, that's not what I'm talking about. When my MIL had dementia my daughter said she actually seemed happier and less worried. My FIL was more worried, because he took care of her despite his own dementia. So, was she less worried because her brain changed in ways that made her less concerned about making a good impression and therefore she was happier and more relaxed, or is it something else. And when your LO grabs the nurses butt, is that brain changes that reduce societal norms that say thats not ok, or is it something they wouldnt even have considered before? I know theres no way to definitively say and maybe it doesnt matter, but these are the things I think about as I navigate my own journey in this hellhole.

My LO has a credit card with a freeze on it but he keeps charging things on it anyway. I dont even know how that happens. Just one more thing he has done that will take me hours to unravel. I'm so damned tired.

I read something in another thread about Boomers being really dismissive of millennials, and considering we birthed them it made me pause. And there is so much that I admire about millenials, so I wondered what others think. Of course I understand this isn't universal, just like not all Boomers are dismissive. I'll go first: 1. I am amazed at how confident they are in the workplace. Knowing their worth and being willing to ask for what they want. I was always so afraid to ask for a raise, or to understand my importance in the scheme of the organizations I worked for. I only came into my own in my 50s. The desire to have work life balance. I know its hard to achieve, but I think we all want it and again, millennials I know are willing to ask for it. 3. Father's taking a bigger role. I know many fathers who are taking an equal, or at least closer to equal, role in parenting than my kids dad ever did, and MUCH bigger than my dad did. Being responsible for making doctors appointments, picking up and dropping off at daycare, groceries, meal prep. I think their children and their relationships will benefit.

I have a lot of cookbooks. For a while I collected vintage cookbooks. But looking at my collection, I have so many cookbooks that I've made one or two recipes from. Most, if not all, of the recipes i use can probably be found online, and if not I'm thinking of typing them up, saving as a pdf and then tossing the cookbook. It just made me wonder, does anyone use cookbooks anymore?

My husband has some serious health issues, and i think that is a contributingfactor to this issue. I've noticed "old person smell". He doesnt shower as often as he used to, but he does wash up and its not a sweaty BO smell but it is noticeable. I read some things here that Persimmon soap will help with old person smell, so I got some for him. Now he smells really unpleasant. Has anyone else found the smell of the persimmon soap worse than the nonenal smell? Is there one brand or type that is better than another?

I was at the League of NH Craftsmen fair at Sunapee today and there were several low passes by very loud jets. I googled but didn't see anything happening today.

My LO hasn't had much of an appetite for a very long time and he's quite thin. Suddenly, over the past few days, he is eating all the time. This morning he got up, had a big bowl of cereal. 10am he's making a sandwich. I said it was a little early for lunch and he said "well I'm hungry". So ok. Then he went back to the fridge twice more for more food. The last several nights he eats a decent dinner then an hour later hes looking for a snack (usually a sweet/ dessert) then an hour later he's getting crackers or cookies or fruit. I'm not looking for advice, and he coukd stand to eat a little more, its just freaking me out because his mother did the same thing, she would sit at the table and ask if she was getting lunch even though she had just eaten. I'm also noticing constant movement, picking at his skin, jiggling his legs, biting fingernails. I feel like this is evidence of further decline. God I hate this so much.

Had my first NH corn of the season and it is delicious. I look forward to corn, tomatoes, peppers and cantaloupe.

I have a couple of hours between appointments and don't want to drive back to the office. Sliding the steering wheel up and in and putting the drivers seat back leaves plenty of room for my laptop on my lap, and then I can plug it in to the AC plug, hook in to my mobile Hotspot and just work away. The AC plugs were one of the things about this car that was attractive to me.

I'm convinced that hospital cafeteria food is about the best bargain out there, and its often decent food. Tuna melt for 4.00? Salad bar looks fresh and good. Yes please. My mother and her friend used to eat at the hospital on a regular basis.

Noticing lots more ads on the pod and of course lots of dick pills and peyronies disease which just made me wonder if the majority of listeners are men. It certainly seems the ads are targeting men.

Is how so many things he does become a problem i have to solve. So many little things happen every day that I have to fix. Trying to be helpful, he empties the dishwasher, but the dishes were dirty. Little things like that, but then I have to figure out what has been washed and what hasn't. Someone calls his phone and schedules an appointment to clean our heating system, but it isn't our usual company and he doesnt realize it was just a sales call and he doesn't tell me so I have no idea until some stranger shows up at our door. It is exhausting.

I have a 2025 Max Platinum. I bought it for two reasons. First, I am planning to take a longish road trip when I retire next year and that may involve sleeping in the car on occasion. Second, my partner has a medical condition that means when we travel together there are a LOT of supplies that we need to bring with us, and more than a couple of days supplies would not fit in my previous car. There are lots of things I really love about the car, but it is kind of big for me (which i wanted but have had a hard time getting used to). The car is at the dealership and they asked if I'd be interested in selling. Am I crazy to consider it? It looks like they'd give me close to what I paid for it. The other thing is that my partner has changed his treatment protocol so there is no need for that much space. Ack. Moving to a slightly smaller car with better gas mileage is attractive to me, and I'd walk away with approx 10k in my pocket. I've never been a "new car every 2 years" person, I usually keep my cars 10 years.