u/Kaelith69

Idk if this is a vent or me just trying to make sense of my own brain but I’ve been having a really rough time lately and OCD feels like it’s taking over everything.

I feel like people hear OCD and immediately think hand washing or arranging stuff neatly but mine feels way more weird and honestly exhausting to explain. Like rn because it’s raining, wet floors and shiny surfaces are driving me insane. Tiles, ceramics, glass, wet roads, that weird sheen on smooth surfaces... I genuinely hate it. It’s not just “ew I don’t like it” either. It makes me feel physically disgusted, irritated, nauseous, like my skin is crawling and I wanna crawl out of my own body. Even seeing it sometimes feels overwhelming. Sometimes bare human skin gives me that exact same disgust feeling too which sounds insane typing out loud. Meanwhile dogs, cats or animals don’t trigger that at all for me, I can pet them fine. But then people act like I’m contradicting myself or faking it because “how are animals okay but humans aren’t?” and honestly idk how to explain it either.

Then there’s the anxiety side of things. My brain feels loud all the time. Like painfully loud. So many thoughts, worries, random spirals and I can’t shut it off. There are so many things I wanna talk about but it feels impossible to explain because half the time I don’t even know how to put it into words in a way people will actually understand. Sometimes I get hyper aware of breathing too and suddenly it feels heavy or weird, like I know logically I’m breathing okay and nothing is wrong but it still feels suffocating somehow and then I start focusing on it more and make myself anxious again.

And honestly it gets lonely. Some days it gets mentally exhausting enough that those dark kms thoughts show up, not in a “I’m gonna do something” way, more in a “I’m tired of being stuck in my own head and I want this to stop for a while” type way. Therapy, meds, psychiatrist etc yes I’m already doing all that before anyone says it, and there are practical limitations to those things in my life that I don’t really wanna get into here. I’m not looking for “go get help” comments. I’m more wondering if anyone here actually relates to this kind of OCD, especially the disgust/sensory side of it, and if anything practical helped make day to day life even a little easier because rn it feels really lonely and exhausting living like this.

Idk if this is a rant, vent or me just dumping thoughts somewhere but I’m having a really hard time lately.

There’s so much stuff in my head I wanna talk about but at the same time it feels impossible to explain any of it properly. Like even if I say it out loud, idk if anyone would actually understand what I mean. It gets lonely after a point. My brain feels way too loud all the time and I just can’t switch it off. Sometimes it even feels physically suffocating too. Like I know I’m breathing fine and there’s probably nothing wrong, but it still feels heavy and uncomfortable like I can’t breathe properly and then I start focusing on it more and make myself even more anxious.

I’ve OCD too and honestly that’s what triggers most of my anxiety. And rn with the rain it’s even worse. This sounds stupid af to explain but wet floors and shiny wet surfaces genuinely make my skin crawl. The sheen on tiles, wet roads, random wet surfaces... it makes me feel disgusted, irritated and weirdly nauseous. Like I wanna throw up and crawl out of my own skin at the same time. My body just feels uncomfortable and anxious for no reason and my brain keeps screaming at me about everything.

Some days it gets so mentally exhausting that those dark kms type thoughts pop in, not in a “I’m gonna do something” way, more like feeling trapped and wanting all of this to stop for a bit. Meds and therapy do help, but not always and definitely not fully. I think the worst part is feeling like nobody around me really understands what it’s like living with anxiety/OCD every single day. Like surviving with a brain that just never shuts up. Idk maybe I just needed to get this out. If anyone’s dealt with stuff like this or found anything that genuinely helped, I’d honestly appreciate hearing it.

Idk how to explain this properly tbh but I just cannot relax rn. My body feels weirdly restless and tense and my brain just won’t shut up for even 2 mins. Took my Clono thinking okay this’ll probably calm things down a bit but it doesn’t really feel like it’s helping and now I’m lowkey stressing about that too :/

The weirdest part is my breathing. Does anyone else suddenly become super aware of it? Like it starts feeling manual or something. Sounds dumb typing it out but it’s like now that I noticed it I can’t unnotice it. The more I think about it the weirder it feels and then my brain starts spiraling more.

It’s not even some huge dramatic panic attack thing, more like this uncomfortable anxious trapped feeling where I just can’t settle down or switch my brain off. Kinda scared, kinda frustrated and honestly just tired rn. Anyone else get this? What actually helps when anxiety gets like this?

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Booked my BE 6 Fe2 on March 2nd and so far it’s mostly just been waiting.

Got the booking confirmation mail and reference ID back then, but after that there haven’t really been any updates from Mahindra’s side.

Asked the dealership a couple times and even they said they haven’t received much info yet either.

So just wanted to know from others here, how long did it take for you guys to get updates like:

production allocation, VIN, delivery estimate etc?

Not complaining or anything, just trying to get a rough idea of the actual waiting period people are seeing rn.

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For me it’s probably childhood itself tbh. My parents were extremely strict and getting beaten was kinda a normal thing growing up. Once I even had boiling tea thrown on me. Didn’t really leave much physical damage somehow, but mentally thats a different story.

I still remember being like 8 years old and getting suicide threats from my parents over really small things. One memory that stuck with me was my dad buying me a tiny toy car worth maybe 40 rs or something, and my mom threatening suicide because apparently I already had “too many toys.” Looking back at it now it sounds insane.

Also had chillies rubbed into my eyes as punishment 🫩

Physically though, the closest I’ve probably come to dying was a cycle accident. I was going down a really steep slope during heavy rain and the brakes just stopped working completely. The road connected into a T junction and right opposite there was a brick wall. I remember panicking because I couldn’t decide whether to turn left or right since the cycle was going way too fast.

Ended up crashing straight into the wall head first.

To this day I genuinely don’t know how I survived that without broken bones or blood or anything major. Somehow walked away almost fine physically, but ever since then I’ve been kinda scared of two wheelers.

So What’s the most traumatic thing you’ve gone through? Could be physical or psychological.....

So I got a pc ,mobo dead probably thinking of getting it repaired so wanted to ask if there are any good spots other than computer care !

people who've been bullied in school, like physically or mentally, by classmates or even teachers... how did you cope with it and get through that phase?

what kept you going at the time? did you just endure it or did something actually help?

also if you told your parents, how did they react? did they support you or brush it off?

and now looking back, were you able to forgive or forget the people who did it, or does it still stay with you?

just curious how different people handled it and what actually worked for y'all.