Me cousin was at ours that morning doing some work for me Ma and asked if he could take me (age 9) to the match. I'm still amazed she agreed, given what had happened only a few months before.
Plonked on a barrier in the Milburn paddock near the home dugout. Shit meself at the carnage after every goal.
Don't know how to recreate the Only Connect style. Have some pictures instead.
We have:
-Limestone Cowboy (bloke in his 50s, never seen without his cheap cowboy boots and stetson).
-Paul Robeson (pretty, friendly lass in her 30s with a disconcertingly deep voice)
-Paedo Baggins (looks like a hobbit, if there was a paedo one)
-Sally (from 'Long Tall Sally')
-Slow Runner (obvious, this one. Jogs, but slower than walking pace. Very odd)
Here's the link if you want to be REALLY annoyed:
https://www.buzzfeed.com/kanksharaina/lateral-thinking-riddles-quiz
No idea what Ricky is trying to describe here.
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"Once, right? I was talking about this in the week actually, we had this teacher and he must have been sort of like sort of sixty then, and we're all about sort of like twelve. We had to do French. You had to put your thing on the booth. And it was-- I told you this haven't I? "Le chat est sur le mur" and all that, right. And "répéter".
"Cats on the wall", right? And you'd repeat it in French. And of course everyone was going "f--", "c--". Just like-- just for fun. And he heard this and he listened back to all of them and he realized, and he went mental. He went "I don't believe this! Do you know how much these cost?""
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They'd recorded themselves swearing in a booth when they were supposed to be repeating French phrases? Or what?
I did want to write "before your other half", just so we could have jokes about it depending on whose turn it was...
Anyhow, I have been with my wife for almost 30 years. However, we don't fart in front of each other. It's happened very occasionally, but I'm mortified when it does.
Yet, I'm happy to fart away next to colleagues or my kids.
I think it goes back to being a gentleman when we started going out and then it became a habit. And, if I'm being honest, I would hate my wife to do it in front of me, as I'd find it a bit of a turn-off.
But speaking to couple friends, they happily parp away together. So, are we weird?
So its a band, and rhe clue is based on onomatopoeia. An' that.
(I couldn't think of more than one).
1.The noise you make when you listen to them, if you've got any taste (B).
Right. We've had the...interesting question from u/Novel_Feedback3254 about imagining Steve talking to himself in the mirror about totty.
Got me thinkin'.
What's the absolute worst thing they ever said?
The following contenders spring immediately to mind:
-I'm not sounding bad here, not trying to offend anyone, but they do all look the-RIGHT.
-(through a chuckle) Bo Selecta.
-Spud 'Ead
-What do you call them when you...when you get people living in houses? Yeah, she's basically just a squatter with a diary.
-Well have you seen some lesbians? They’re right dogs. Good night.
-Ricky and Steve's massive overreaction to 'Tell ya what, erm, works here, erm, young Alex Zane'.
This may well be catching up on the olds. We may have done this. But I haven't. Alright?
Everyone has to automatically downvote anyone boring enough to say they believe one of the lads's anecdotes to be invented*. That'll learn 'em.
I'm not saying they're all true, (for example, I'm starting to believe some Monkey News was bollocks) but ok, we get it, you can see through it, you're very clever. How's that working out for you?
*Apart from the Christmas Condoms, about which even I am 50/50.
We've had a flood of...oh, no, we haven't.
Might as well give the answers. Sniff.
Inter min. able. (We've had worse).
I con a class tick. (Works).
Auntie dill Whovian.
3 words what the lads (mis/over) use an' that. In their VOCabulary.
The least that Il nerazzuri can achieve (i, Steve)
Korovyev tricks a top-notch bloodsucker (i, Ricky)
Uncle's wife's herb enjoys BBC sci-fi series (a, Karl)
You know, lads who think they're- you know, think they're a bit of a lad and think that that means it's good.
It's just that thing of, you know, get it done right the first time.
No messin' about. So, uh, yeah, it's just that, innit? It’s like, just do it right the first time. Once you've washed up, right? You put the pots away, you don't do 'em again.
Labels what daft lads who go fighting at the football wear. An' that.
My German compass is broken. 'East' has fell out. (L).
Molest Skeletor's fish-themed vehicle (P&S).
The Barbie Girl group is attractive? I'm undecided (A).
They're all mountains and calderas an' that.
How a murderer used to collect his dole (K).
What you might exclaim when you injure yourself trying to catch something you dropped with your foot (K).
What Armitage Shanks do a lot (M).
I know what he means. Weird bloke who taught me violin at school did it when he spoke, as did my uncle Stein, and a jeweller I knew through work when I lived in London.
I wouldn't necessarily go as far as limiting it to those dressed in tweed, however.
Scotch fella refuses a cuppa because he is worried his mother is exhausted (BG).
Ralph Macchio asks his cousin to keep his kid quiet (VJ).
Mr Sheep? Please communicate menagerie etiquette to Mr Parlour (BT).
Last one is tricky. They all work, though.