Now, before I ask my question, I just wanna say, I'm just exercising my free will. So, try not to judge me lol. I find myself in a predicament and came up with a...idea of a solution. And I'd like some, um, guidance, maybe?...Idunno, but anyway...

So I'm fully verse. But usually, like 95% of the time, I top. There's like a plethora of bottoms where I'm located. And I'm ok with this. But once in a while, I get into the mood to bottom. And I'm not just saying, I want to just sit on it. No, I need ACTIOOOOOON!!! I want my soul touched. Pinned down, bust down, all around. Rounds. Till the paint drips down the walls. I'm talkin, IN ITTTTTT!!!!.

Ya know?

But, where I am, there aren't many black dudes around, and that factors into why I top most of the time. And while, I'm not against being topped by a white guy...that face, you're making right now, yeah. I feel the same way. In my mind, I only see myself being topped by other black men. Personal preference. But you also need to know what you're doing. Can't have people playing around in my bootyhole.

For example: I had one guy that had me on the bed, bent over, and had my cheeks in each hand, and kept shaking them, mumbling "sexy" whatever's. Mind you, I though he was gonna eat it. But no, he just kept shaking it, and kinda "blowing" on it or something...Then, when he put it in, his stroke was so...weak. There was plenty of dick, but he wasn't really "fucking" me. Kinda miner "taps", and "grinding", but no "stroking".

I don't want to say I was bored, but...for some of us, it takes a lot of effort to clean out. And no one whatsoever their efforts to feel wasted.

Mind you, this isn't like a fantasy or something. I know how I like to be handled when I'm in the "Downward Dog" position. I've come to realize I enjoy being "stressed out". There was this one guy, who, mind you, was two hours late, who had me pinned to the bed like a pretzel. He was assertive, long-winded, and had me stressed for a couple of hours. Outstanding.

I would like to add, this is not a size thing. It's a skill thing. I had one guy who, I admit, I prejudge. "Good size, but I've had bigger. No biggie though." I didn't think he'd be deep diving. I thought it was gonna be a standard hook-up...

This man had surgical precision. I could feel him in my toes. R. Wiggum - "I'm in danger."

So, it's fair to say my options are a bit scarce out here.

So here's my solution:

I'm thinking of trying to make connections in other places. I'm single. And I should be mingling. But in the location I'm in, there's not enough "us" for me to mingle with. And at this point in my life, don't mind taking a flight somewhere for a weekend and re-discovering where my spleen is.

Distance is a construct anyway.

So I figure if I reach out online, and connect with other black men, explain what we're looking for, yada, yada, this would be a great way to scratch this itch. Takes more time, but I'm betting on the quality of the interaction because of the time. They feel me out a bit, I feel them out a bit. Exchange some pic, FaceTime from time to time. Talk about status and boundaries.

Figure out a safety word.

Then get into it.

If I was getting my insides-turned-outside every six months, I'd be a happy camper.

And I, by no means, am looking for a male harem. Just one or two skilled individuals who can match my frequency, that I can hit up every couple months and be like "Yo, what's your weekend look like?". No complications, no hag-ups, no weird stuff, no tapping out, just two people(?) playing Twister, enjoying each other's company for a moment. And then carrying on.

My questions being:

1. Is this a bit extra? Am I doing the most?
2. Does anyone have this sort of dynamic, or similar, in their life? And how's that been for you, if you don't mind me asking...
3. What online spaces would be the best to reach out on? ( I was thinking of A4A. God, I miss the days of "BGC"...R.I.P).
4. Any questions? lol

I don’t even know how to explain this, but I can say, without a doubt, I love myself. It took me along time to get here, but I’m here. Life is “Life-ing”, but I’m doing the damn thing. But as I get older, I keep seeing more and more things that I can’t help but to question. For example, if I want to date, I don’t have any resources or guidance in doing this. If you look at almost any subreddit for gay men, the relationship advice is…morbid. Not the most inspiring individuals. I know gay dating is hard, but it’s crazy how we have such a negative view of the idea, without any self-reflection. Like, GM’s date based on sexual positions in the bedroom, then talk about how GM’s don’t know how to be in relationships…but that’s it. I have no idea how to interact with another gay man, without there being a “condition”. It might be someone being a total bottom, or being dominant, or submissive (rarely), or having to open the relationship, or having to be someone’s BBC (Yup, that’s just a regular Tuesday). Like, there’s no discussion of these things and how they’re an actual factor our social dynamics. Then there’s the “unrequited feelings” we have for people who can’t return our affections. Instead of being told “I need to stop liking straight guys”, I should’ve been taught to look at why? What attributes make be attractive to this man, so I can recognize those same qualities in someone that can return my affections, mutually. Or the possibility of not having this human experience, because it’s a numbers game (I live in the Midwest. As a black guy, my pool of bachelors is pretty abysmal, before I walk out the door, before hello)…By no means am I sad I’m single. I just wish we had better resources on navigating on how to build those type of connections…but I’m pretty sure I’m screwed…

So I have this track that I'm trying to mix, but every time I start, I end up having to start over. I'd like some guidance on how I should start or where I should focus my attention on, or just any guidance really...

I’ve been listening to a lot of home-recorded voiceover demos lately, and I keep noticing something interesting:

Even when the performance and mic are solid, some recordings still don’t quite sound “professional” in the way commercial VO does.

From what I can tell, it usually isn’t the voice or the gear itself, but more things like:

• room reflections / untreated space
• noise floor (even subtle hiss or hum)
• inconsistent vocal levels between takes
• proximity/placement differences from session to session

It feels like those small technical issues stack up and affect how “broadcast-ready” the final result sounds, even if the read is strong.

Curious how others here think about that balance between performance vs recording environment — especially for home setups.

What do you feel is the biggest factor that makes a home VO recording sound “less pro”?

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Hello,

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I'm just ranting but, being gay is exhausting, outside of the obvious reasons. From a human experience view point, I feel like...less than human? I'm not sure if those are the right words, but its a couple of things..."small" things that add up over time:

• Trauma bonding over (non-existing) relationship issues. We are actively the villains and victims in our own stories, and choose not to take responsibility in our own narratives. You CANNOT talk about how hard it is dating and you're a total bottom/top/side, etc, etc. That literally lowers your pool of eligible bachelors. And every "condition" or "requirement" you think you need is actively makes it harder for yourself. YOU are the problem. And YOU will most likely be the problem, until YOU are ready to "advance the plot)
• Being a minority: White people are majority in this community. And most white people, like any race, want to interact with people who look like them. And there's nothing wrong with that, but with them being the majority in this community (and I'm going to include everyone that appeals to traditional European beauty standards...its a spectrum of opportunity and privilege), being a minority IS less in this community. This isn't debatable. And being that anyone outside is seen less than a person, more of a tool (B.B.C., Latino, Top, etc). Like, if I want to just be around other black people, I have to fly somewhere. And, honestly, this makes me just feel "less"...
• Then there's the whole aspect of what is recognizable as "gay": Despite us wanting to not to be put in a square, or stereotyped in a way, when we see something that doesn't look or sound gay, we do two things: Either it's fetishized, or dismissed. If a person doesn't fit the frame of reference we've built for ourselves, regardless of anything, it's seen as "wrong"...But in that aspect, I feel like I'm "alone". I know I'm not.

But, also, I am. I'm a black guy in the midwest with weird hobbies.

And at the end of the day, I don't know how to explore my sexuality, outside of the "parameters" set in this community, outside the sexual, racial, and/or physical dynamics...sigh...being a human is so exhausting...

Just looking for some people to play with.