u/L-Miche

Hey! 👋

Ich bin 28 und komme aus der Nähe von Heidelberg.

Ich suche einfach ein paar Leute, mit denen man sich entspannt austauschen kann, gerne auch einfach online. Dabei geht es mir gar nicht darum, ständig dieselben Hobbys zu haben, sondern eher um die Art, wie man miteinander redet.

Ich habe oft das Gefühl, beim Zuhören nicht nur das Was, sondern gleichzeitig auch das Wie und Warum mitzudenken. Dadurch entstehen bei mir oft Gespräche, in denen ein Thema zum nächsten führt und man zwischen Alltag, Humor und etwas tieferen Gedanken hin und her springt. Wenn du weißt, was ich meine, stehen die Chancen wahrscheinlich ganz gut, dass wir auf einer ähnlichen Wellenlänge sind.

Ansonsten schaue ich gerne Serien oder Anime, spiele hin und wieder Videospiele, koche gerne und probiere dabei auch mal ungewöhnliche Ideen aus. Ich bin generell jemand, der sich schnell für neue Themen begeistern kann und sich dann gerne etwas tiefer damit beschäftigt.

Wenn du Lust auf entspannte Gespräche hast, gerne analysierst, auch mal über ungewöhnliche Gedanken diskutierst oder einfach jemand bist, der sich über den Tag verteilt gerne austauscht, dann schreib mir gerne.

I’m 28 and I’m trying to describe something that feels very fundamental, but also very hard to put into words.

From the outside, I have lived a life. I’ve been in situations, I’ve done things, I’ve interacted with people. There are memories. But internally, none of it is anchored to me. It’s almost like those memories exist, but they don’t feel like mine. They could just as well belong to someone else, and I’m just holding onto them without any real connection.

Because of that, I don’t have what I would describe as a built or grounded sense of self. Not in the way most people seem to have it. When others talk about their past, their experiences clearly form who they are. It’s structured, integrated, and alive inside them. For me, there is no such structure.

This creates a second problem that is even more isolating:I can’t really connect to people or get close to someone, because most people operate from that assumed baseline of a formed self and integrated experience. It’s treated as something completely normal and self-evident. But for me, that baseline is missing.

So when I interact with others, it often feels like I’m not actually being seen. Not because they are doing something wrong, but because they are relating to something in me that doesn’t really exist in the way they expect it to.

It feels more like I’m at a point where I’m trying to establish my existence in the present moment, rather than building on a past that already defines me. And because of that, it doesn’t even feel like my life has properly started yet.

What I actually want is very simple in theory, but seems extremely hard in practice:I want to genuinely experience things and have those experiences become part of me. I want to build a real sense of self from lived moments, not just observe or pass through them.

Right now, it feels like I’m constantly present in situations, but not truly participating in a way that integrates into my identity.

So my questions are:

Has anyone experienced something similar to this?

Is there a way to move from this “non-anchored” state into actual lived experience?

What is the underlying mechanism here?

I’m not looking for surface-level advice. I’m trying to understand what this actually is and how people get out of it, if they do.

Hi!

I’m 28 years old, from Germany, and I work as a MediaDesigner.

One thing that probably describes me better than anything else is that it often feels like I have X ray vision when talking to people. I naturally connect small details, recognize patterns, and often notice things that aren’t said directly. It’s not something I consciously try to do. It’s simply how my mind works.

Because of that, I really value honest communication. I appreciate people who are comfortable being themselves, who say what’s on their mind, and who don’t feel the need to play a role. If you also tend to notice the little things in conversations or often read between the lines, there’s a good chance we’ll understand each other.

I’m 180 cm, have black hair, and an average build.

I’m looking for someone in Germany or the surrounding German speaking countries. Long distance isn’t what I’m looking for because I’d love to build something that can eventually become part of everyday life.

I’d describe myself as calm, loyal, and rather introverted. I don’t need a huge social circle to be happy, but I do miss having one meaningful person to share life with. Someone who enjoys talking about their day, sharing random thoughts, laughing together, and simply feeling comfortable with each other.

In my free time I enjoy going to the gym, watching series, playing video games from time to time, cooking, and making homemade pizza while experimenting with my own recipes. I also enjoy spending time with friends.

If you read this and thought, „I know exactly what he means” I’d genuinely love to hear from you.

Tell me a little about yourself. What’s something you’re passionate about, or what’s a small thing that always makes your day a little better?

Hi!

I’m 28 years old, from Germany, and I work as a MediaDesigner.

One thing that probably describes me better than anything else is that it often feels like I have X ray vision when talking to people. I naturally connect small details, recognize patterns, and often notice things that aren’t said directly. It’s not something I consciously try to do. It’s simply how my mind works.

Because of that, I really value honest communication. I appreciate people who are comfortable being themselves, who say what’s on their mind, and who don’t feel the need to play a role. If you also tend to notice the little things in conversations or often read between the lines, there’s a good chance we’ll understand each other.

I’m 180 cm, have black hair, and an average build.

I’m looking for someone in Germany or the surrounding German speaking countries. Long distance isn’t what I’m looking for because I’d love to build something that can eventually become part of everyday life.

I’d describe myself as calm, loyal, and rather introverted. I don’t need a huge social circle to be happy, but I do miss having one meaningful person to share life with. Someone who enjoys talking about their day, sharing random thoughts, laughing together, and simply feeling comfortable with each other.

In my free time I enjoy going to the gym, watching series, playing video games from time to time, cooking, and making homemade pizza while experimenting with my own recipes. I also enjoy spending time with friends.

If you read this and thought, „I know exactly what he means” I’d genuinely love to hear from you.

Tell me a little about yourself. What’s something you’re passionate about, or what’s a small thing that always makes your day a little better?

Hi!

I’m 28 years old, from Germany, and I work as a MediaDesigner.

One thing that probably describes me better than anything else is that it often feels like I have X ray vision when talking to people. I naturally connect small details, recognize patterns, and often notice things that aren’t said directly. It’s not something I consciously try to do. It’s simply how my mind works.

Because of that, I really value honest communication. I appreciate people who are comfortable being themselves, who say what’s on their mind, and who don’t feel the need to play a role. If you also tend to notice the little things in conversations or often read between the lines, there’s a good chance we’ll understand each other.

I’m 180 cm, have black hair, and an average build.

I’m looking for someone in Germany or the surrounding German speaking countries. Long distance isn’t what I’m looking for because I’d love to build something that can eventually become part of everyday life.

I’d describe myself as calm, loyal, and rather introverted. I don’t need a huge social circle to be happy, but I do miss having one meaningful person to share life with. Someone who enjoys talking about their day, sharing random thoughts, laughing together, and simply feeling comfortable with each other.

In my free time I enjoy going to the gym, watching series, playing video games from time to time, cooking, and making homemade pizza while experimenting with my own recipes. I also enjoy spending time with friends.

If you read this and thought, „I know exactly what he means” I’d genuinely love to hear from you.

Tell me a little about yourself. What’s something you’re passionate about, or what’s a small thing that always makes your day a little better?

Hi!

I’m INFJ, 28 years old, from Germany, and I work as a MediaDesigner.

One thing that probably describes me better than anything else is that it often feels like I have X ray vision when talking to people. I naturally connect small details, recognize patterns, and often notice things that aren’t said directly. It’s not something I consciously try to do. It’s simply how my mind works.

Because of that, I really value honest communication. I appreciate people who are comfortable being themselves, who say what’s on their mind, and who don’t feel the need to play a role. If you also tend to notice the little things in conversations or often read between the lines, there’s a good chance we’ll understand each other.

I’m 180 cm, have black hair, and an average build.

I’m looking for someone in Germany or the surrounding German speaking countries. Long distance isn’t what I’m looking for because I’d love to build something that can eventually become part of everyday life.

I’d describe myself as calm, loyal, and rather introverted. I don’t need a huge social circle to be happy, but I do miss having one meaningful person to share life with. Someone who enjoys talking about their day, sharing random thoughts, laughing together, and simply feeling comfortable with each other.

In my free time I enjoy going to the gym, watching series, playing video games from time to time, cooking, and making homemade pizza while experimenting with my own recipes. I also enjoy spending time with friends.

If you read this and thought, „I know exactly what he means” I’d genuinely love to hear from you.

Tell me a little about yourself. What’s something you’re passionate about, or what’s a small thing that always makes your day a little better?