u/Least_Homework_9720

I feel like it must be so peaceful and quiet for people with good mental health and it’s hard for me to even imagine existing that way.

I always feel like everyone knows how to navigate social situations and speak in a corporate environment except me. Like, did everyone learn this in college? I have been in corporate for almost 10 years now and the fakeness and the unspoken expectations and the jargon still feels incredibly foreign to me.

I don’t feel like I struggle with social situations or societal expectations anywhere else outside of work. Is there somewhere everyone learned this stuff or is there something wrong with me?

I’ve struggled with one particular aspect of my job. Items from people on my team will get emailed to me for quick-turn reviews and with all the emails I get, they can easily get missed.

I get a lot of email notifications generally, sometimes multiple notifications for the same individual comments that are coming through workfront and they’re often coming from the same person, making it difficult to separate those from these review emails. So due to confusion with so many email notifications (and a lot of the workfront ones also use the word “review” making it easy to mix them up), sometimes the urgent review emails are getting missed by me. And I feel terrible about it.

However, I find it odd that my coworkers never shoot me a message in teams to make sure I got the email they sent. I don’t want this to be a frequent occurrence, and I’m trying to be better at staying on top of reviews when they come in and tried to use rules to organize my inbox which has helped the problem a lot, but it still happens sometimes. And my coworkers have always gone over my head to my boss to complain instead of checking with me via teams…I just find the lack of effort to confirm receipt to be incredibly odd.

In my work experience, when you have something urgent you want someone to handle right away, you use IM over email. I don’t want to make things harder for anyone and I’m really trying to stop making this mistake. At the same time, am I being crazy to think it’s reasonable to shoot me a quick IM if I haven’t responded to an email? Isn’t there also an option for the sender to flag priority of emails as urgent to help keep them from getting lost in my inbox? Should I be organizing my inbox differently, like is there some technique/standard I don’t know about? I just feel there are better ways for me and my coworkers to work together to fix this issue and I am willing to do whatever I can do on my part, but these don’t seem like very big asks to me as we’re all on the same team trying to help each other get the work done.

I feel like I go through this same cycle over and over. I start a job. It’s good for a few months, then for whatever reason I lose motivation and I can’t get it back. I start making mistakes and missing deadlines, everyone gets mad at me and I feel like I’m in a hole I can’t dig myself out of even when I’m trying my hardest and actually want to. I want to apologize to my coworkers and make things right and get on their good side but it feels impossible.

I have also never had a job that keeps me consistently busy. It’s always feast or famine and right now it seems my whole team is light and without much work to do. And it’s really hard for me to adjust back and forth from having so much to do and nothing to do, not to mention the work I’m doing isn’t something I’m passionate about. The only thing that has excited me about this job is finding lots of opportunities for process improvement and trying to bring ideas to management but nothing is ever implemented. And I feel like I’m doing a lot of things wrong but no one will be direct and tell me. Instead everyone seems to try to work around me rather than with me and it makes me feel ashamed and inadequate.

The career I have isn’t even what I want to be doing and I strongly feel I need something more creative but I also need to pay the bills. I hate this. I feel alone, disconnected l, stupid, useless and purposeless. This isn’t what I want to do with my life but I feel like there is no alternative and I’m just stuck, and much as I don’t love this job they’ll probably fire me and then things will be even worse because this job market is so bad.

How do I find even the tiniest ounce of motivation right now?

I have a friend who is T1 and sadly we do not live close, so I’m limited in how much I can help them. I am concerned they are a danger to themselves, I’ve tried very hard to be supportive, but I feel pretty ill-equipped to help them in the way they need, and they don’t seem interested in seeking adequate professional help or resources.

Has anyone this sub come out the other side after struggling with mental health related to managing t1? What worked? What didn’t? If it took some pushing/convincing for you to get professional help, what made you actually do so? Are there any specific resources/treatments that really helped you mentally? Is there anything I can say that is helpful/anything I should avoid saying that you hear a lot that is not helpful?

I feel very lost/unhelpful to my friend, so I really appreciate your perspectives and suggestions. Thank you.

I don’t know if this is the best sub for this but I don’t know where else to go and I feel alone and stuck.

I have a friend who’s struggling with their mental health and they keep coming to me for months now to vent about their SH behaviors in somewhat graphic detail. They live in another state than me, and I feel like even though they’re going to therapy they’re not making any effort to try healthy methods of coping with their emotions

I’ve kindly suggested at least twice that I think they need a higher level of care. I’ve sent them resources in their area. I have told them how devastated I would be if something happened to them. But they will send me a lot of concerning messages that make me worry they’re an immediate danger to themselves and won’t respond for hours.

I have my own mental health struggles. I’m not a therapist. I can only do so much. I don’t want to leave my friend feeling alone and judged, and I have experienced another friend taking their own life before, so I’m incredibly sensitive about trying to be supportive, but I also feel so drained and stressed.

Does anyone have advice on how to set boundaries here without making my friend feel abandoned/judged?

I’m really struggling to figure this one out. And honestly part of the problem is I am having some sleep issues which I’m looking into. I get tired and sometimes oversleep or can’t make it through the day without napping and then I struggle to wake up to get ready to leave my house for plans I have.

I have tried a few things like adding alarms to remind me to start getting ready so I don’t get distracted and alarms that remind me when it’s time to leave the house but it seems like a lot of the time no matter what I do I end up being 10-20 mins late and while my friends haven’t said anything, I’m sure it bothers them and I hate myself for not being able to be on time like a normal person.

What else should I be trying?

I’m really struggling at work and have been for some time. I feel like everyone on my team is upset with me based on passive aggressive behavior, and people just generally not interacting with me or sharing information with me much. I have also struggled with being able to focus and manage deadlines because of some health and personal issues that have been going on for me for a while, and I probably should have asked for more help or brought it all to my manager’s attention sooner but I just didn’t know how.

I’m at a place where I am starting to feel better, the personal issues have gotten better and I really want to repair my performance and dynamic with my team but I feel like everyone is very angry at me and has given up on me.

Is there a way I should approach this with my manager? I feel like I don’t know how to talk about any of it. I don’t want to come off like I’m trying to play the victim role and I want to take accountability. I don’t blame my coworkers for losing patience with me, but I also don’t feel like I’ve been given direct/clear feedback about what I have been doing wrong either. I am looking for other jobs just in case, but the job market is bad and I would still like to resolve things with my current team if I can. I just don’t know how.