u/Legal_Coconut_5619

Every album so far has felt very distinct with its colour scheme and visual direction. Dogrel was all very black and white, a hero’s death was blue, skinty fia was red, and romance was green but the album cover was blue and pink. Now the new album seems to be black and blue, but the cover is blue and pink again with a similar face? It seems really strange to me for a band who have been so big on visuals. I wonder what it means or if it’s just a coincidence.

I’m a woman in my mid 20s and my mindset has become very victim like and I feel like everyone around me just has it better. I’m autistic and struggle a lot with executive dysfunction so instead of trying to sort my problems for years I’ve defaulted to this, but it goes beyond that too.

For example, I’ve been having pain during sex for years and no doctors have been able to help, so I’m constantly jealous of all my friends and other women who get to experience this without pain and it feels so unfair. Same with my mental health issues, I’m like damn some people don’t sit around the house all day because of their anxiety and depression, how is that fair. I also have lots of self worth and confidence issues, so I’m constantly like damn I’ll never get to be super pretty like other girls get to. Etc.

I really want to make a change to my life and stop feeling like this but I really don’t know how to. Life just feels like a constant reminder of what I don’t and never will have. I constantly just think that there are no redeeming qualities about myself that I wouldn’t want to swap with someone else.

I had SRS over 4 years ago in the UK. I also had a cosmetic revision around 2.5 years ago. I’m pretty happy with the aesthetics, but the function is making me miserable.

The idea of sex being pleasurable has become a completely foreign concept to me. I can orgasm pretty easily if I watch or read something, but apart from that there isn’t much to enjoy. Oral feels like nothing or painful, being touched just hurts and feels horrible and frictiony, my clit constantly feels bruised and irritated, I have so much scar tissue internally that I’ve just given up on dilating and still not had PIV 4 YEARS POST OP.

I’ve been to see my surgeon many times, I’ve been to see gynos, I’ve had an MRI, internal exam etc. All I’ve figured out is the scar tissue. I also have this sort of slightly yellowy discharge most days.

What can I do? I can’t conceptualise sex being pleasurable anymore and I’ve basically just become a fucking service top lol, which isn’t me at all. I’m getting so frustrated with it but I’m only in my 20s and I want a good sex life. I thought this surgery would help me enjoy sex way more and while it’s really helped with my dysphoria, it’s totally fucked up my idea of what sex should be and feel like.

I do get some pleasure sometimes btw, but it’s almost always overridden by pain eventually.

Some advice would be amazing because I really need to do something.

Currently doing ERP and my friend came over earlier and walked all over my house with her shoes on. My brain is screaming at me to clean all the floors but that would take so long so I’ve decided to go to bed and see how I feel in the morning.

I just can’t figure out what a normal reaction to this would be. Is it my OCD if I clean the floors? Should I just be leaving it and living with it? I’m not sure.

I’m a woman in my 20s and I just finished university. I really need to find a job soon or I’m gonna have to move back in with my parents who live in a different city where I don’t have any friends. However, I’ve looked and any job I like the sound of requires a bunch of experience I don’t have. I’m starting to freak out a little bit…

I have OCD and IBS which can take up a good few hours of my day sometimes. This means I can’t really get an office job or a job where I have to start early. I could get a bar job but I’m struggling to find one atm and urgh I just feel screwed. I’d love to work for myself, or a remote job, or something in fashion or music or writing but they all feel so impossible and I’m so worried about moving back home. Am I screwed?

I’ve been trying to do ERP but it’s so incredibly hard. My OCD all revolves around poop. I’m constantly convinced I’ve pooped my pants, I can’t fart for that reason, I often worry I can smell poop, or that there’s poop on the floor. I have to shower each time I go and also clean the floor in case any fell off the toilet roll and onto the floor. I have to clean the toilet seat every time I go to the toilet as well. I also end up cleaning my whole apartment floor and changing my bedsheets often because I’m convinced I pooped myself. It just never stops. Also I have IBS and have explosive poops sometimes and when that happens I essentially clean my whole bathroom because I’m worried it’s gone everywhere.

So far I’ve managed to avoid cleaning the floor a couple of times, I’ve managed to wash my body once in the shower instead of twice but not much better. It still takes me 20-30 minutes to wipe, I’m still cleaning the floor and toilet seat etc.

I don’t know what to do. I feel like I need to embrace the poop and accept the chance of there being poop everywhere, but it feels so gross. I’m so scared of having skid marks, or of bringing a date back to mine and it smelling of poop or them standing in some poop on the floor. I’m worried of being dirty compared to everyone else because I just have no idea what’s an acceptable level of poop to be on someone now. I have no idea at what level people are happy when wiping and things like that. Especially as a woman I feel such shame about being dirty or gross or not being as clean as other girls idk. I just need some advice. Thanks!

I’m a trans woman in my 20s and I’ve been fully transitioned for about 4 years now. I started transitioning as a teenager and so generally I seem to pass very well. I’ve only told a couple of close friends that I’m trans and afaik the rest aren’t aware. There’s three guys in my friend group who’ve tried/are trying to get with me, I’ve got with guys before who haven’t known until I told them and my friends ask me about pregnancy and periods as do doctors, so unless the whole world is trying to catch me out then idk I think I look pretty good.

It took me a LONG time to get here and I spent quite a while looking visibly trans and I would get asked what my pronouns are constantly, only gay men would be into me etc. This gave me self confidence issues for YEARS that I’ve only recently got over and I feel better about myself than ever at the moment. It took my ex girlfriend who at the time I thought was the love of my life breaking up with me to get a reality check with it all.

However, tonight a woman in the pub who I was chatting to said to me something like ‘wait can I ask what your pronouns are?’ and I’m a little scared of spiralling back and losing my confidence because I’m like did she know I’m trans??

I exclusively date women now and I’m pretty visibly queer, I dress like a lesbian and wear baggy clothes, I have a shaggy wolf cut kinda thing going on, I don’t wear makeup etc so idk if she might’ve thought I was non binary or something as it was a fairly queer bar with a few others trans people knocking about, but idk I need advice on how to not let this totally ruin my self confidence.

I also sat there last night and watched two other trans people I know who are visibly and openly trans (not friends with but my friend knows them from work) talk to guys and try and get laid and I was sat there thinking wtf is wrong with me why do I care so much that I can barely talk to strangers and they’re just confident and don’t give a fuck.