u/LeilaJun

Switched my 14-year-old mattress to a Brooklyn signature medium and I can’t sleep through the night suddenly.

I feel like I’m floating on top and never actually get comfortable, I’m waking up every couple hours, and the upper right quadrant of my back is hurting.

I can’t spend the next 30 days exhausted and not sleeping because it takes that long to make a switch, what the hell?!

I’m F43, 5.1ft and 130lbs.

Hi! It used to be so easy for me to look up recipe I had saved. I used AllRecipes and a french website like it, and I had years of saved recipes in there.

But allrecipes got acquired and lost my account, and I can’t login to the French website anymore.

Since those years, I have saved recipes everywhere form TikTok to the NYTimes recipes app, Instagram and recipes emailed to me by family.

The problem is that when I want to cook something, I just don’t know where to look for my saved recipes!

I tried to have a Notion page with subpages, I organized it with Recipes Done Savory / Sweet, and Recipes to try Done / Savory. But that’s not working out as I hoped.

I saw an ad a while back for some app but I’m sure you’d have to pay.

My goal is to have one simple centralized place with title of the recipe and a photo or something (length of time maybe).

Anyways, has anyone found a solution for this very modern problem?

Thanks in advance!

Hey, I’m (43F) finding myself in a situation that feels quite tangled, and I would love some outside perspectives from other expats.

There are a lot of different parts to this puzzle, it’s not a straight forward this or that situation at all.

Geographical background: born in the middle of france, lived on a French island 3-11, teenage years in france, 4 years in MI, 3 in Boston, 1 in Virginia, 3 in RI, and the last 14 years in NYC although 2 of those I was living in Mexico.

Core issue: I’m finding myself without a local or any other central place with a community of family and friends. I have plenty of people in my life locally, including in community and regular people, but none I would count as actual close friends, people I could call favors in (I’ve tried), or people to put down as emergency people.

Problem: Between all the many changes my entire life between geographical changes, divorce and career changes, and without kids or even a church lol, I don’t have the benefit of a shared past history or of having a structure helping build that kind of closeness. So I think that’s also part of the issue.

When did I have that in the past: I had what I’m looking for several times, for example when I lived in MI, in MA, in VA and in Mexico. I think part of the issue is NYC.

Where people are: Parents and siblings moved to another part of france, where I don’t have old friends. I have couple friends there now since 2020. I have some high school friends in my hometown and in Paris. I also have a cousin in Paris. Have some friends in MI and MA, but wouldn’t want to move there. Some friends in Mexico too.

Family background: always complicated, which is why I moved away in the first place. Somewhat better now, but I wouldn’t wanna to move back home to soon after be expected to take care of my mom (she didn’t take care of us growing up). I like seeing them 1-2 times per year for a month ideally.

Love background: Divorced for 11 years, I’m regularly dating people, but no one that transformed into a proper long term relationship, which really compounds this issue a lot. I do find dating and relationships much easier in france overall, people there commit more easily and are just more reliable socially as a whole.

Personality: I’ve always made friends very easily and continue to do so, everywhere I go. I’ve also been a community builder for 20 years, both virtual and in person. I host and gather people, and it’s easy for me to reach out to people to make plans. I go to meetups in the city all the time, many regularly, where I’m seeing people regularly.

Work / money: I changed career four years ago, and I’m now working mostly remote (US) and a desk job, which I like. I’m now making a stable income after years as a freelancer, so working in the U.S. is really helping with saving for retirement and all of that. I could have the same quality of life elsewhere as far as money is concerned, but without the saving capability.

Health: I’ve been dealing with multiple chronic health issues for a few years, much I’m in the middle of hopefully sorting or managing at the moment. It’s a lot of appointments weekly. That’s easier to stay in NYC for that.

Living: I live in my own 1BR apartment in NYC, where I’ve been in the entire time I’ve been in the city. I love my neighborhood although it’s far from the center, so it doesn’t help the friends / community situation at all. However the only other neighborhood I could afford is equally as far, so no point in moving within the city. NJ isn’t more affordable either.

So what to do?

Every time I think of a solution, there’s an equal amount of problems that rise for the solutions it would provide. If I move to Paris, I’d lose my U.S. income and I wouldn’t live near nature like I do now.

Making more friends doesn’t help, I keep making them but it doesn’t translate into the kind of communities I’ve had in the past.

Moving somewhere else in the U.S. seems like it would be yet another starting over.

Moving back to Mexico scares me with my health, because it’s where I started most of my health issues. And also, I’d lose my U.S. income.

TL;DR: Can’t find solid local group of friends and communities despite being outgoing and having plenty of people in my life. Solving one problem create a new one between all different kinds of categories from love to health, money to family.

Hi, I’ve had clear discharge for four years, and mammograms and ultrasound say no cancer.

I met with a breast surgeon today and she ordered an MRI because she said I have “copious” amount of leakage.

She said most likely she’ll need to do surgery and remove several ducts, which could cause a flat nipple and loss of sensation.

So, for those of you in the same situation, did you do the surgery or not? Why or why not?

If you did the surgery, how does your breast look like now? I really like my breast and nipples, so I’d really think twice about an elective surgery if I’m gonna spend the rest of my life with a flat nipple.

Thanks in advance!

Hi! My mattress is a hands-me down that’s at least 14 years old, so it’s time.

What would be good brands / models with the following requirements?

Here’s what I need in a mattress:

I’m a combination sleeper (back / sides), so mattress needs to be responsive.
It needs to keep me cool.
No springs, memory foam ideal.
Queen size.
Can be rotated and flipped.

And in case it makes a difference, I’m 43F, 5.1ft and 127lbs.

Thanks in advance!

Sharing this here because I haven’t seen it mention much, if at all, so far.

Pelvic floor issues can totally be a big factor in low motility. Particularly tight pelvic floor.

To check it, go to a pelvic floor PT for an assessment.

For women, this can include an internal exam, but it’s all based on consent, so you can turn it down. Practitioners are trained to be gentle and caring, so they won’t be pushing you at all.

If you have a pelvic floor issue (which honestly might be all of us with SIBO), you will have to do pelvic floor therapy with weekly appointments and daily at-home exercises, for maybe 2-3 months.

This can help up to 50% of bloating too fyi!

So if you’ve been on this journey forever, really try it because it could be a big help. And do some research on it, it’s actually interesting and makes total sense as to why it would have such an impact on low motility.

I’m thinking of going in that direction after years of recruitment, and I’m wondering how different or similar the day to day it.

Is there has much flexibility of schedule and hours in customer success as recruiting?

What are pros and cons compared to recruiting?

Just in case it makes a difference, I have experience in tech and commercial construction recruiting.

Thanks in advance!

Preferably in old San Juan, but flexible.

Obviously it’s on the 4th of July, which might complicate things.

Thanks in advance!

I recently started thinking of joining some boards.

I come from high-level music and entertainment worlds, so I’m thinking of joining a board of something something cultural. I’m also interested in anything related to work being done locally or internationally for women and children.

If you’re serving on boards, how did you find the one(s) you’re serving on? What was the process to join like?

Now that you’re on it, what does that look like as far as responsibility and time commitment?

And finally, what are you personally getting out of it?

I have a lot of experience with community building, marketing and event planning, so that would probably be the sort of things I’d be best suited to help with. Not so much fundraising or accounting for example.

Thanks in advance!

Unless you have a history of psychosis and such, personally or in your family.

But if you’re healthy and thinking about it, just hop on over the fear! It’s so worth it!

And you can start small too. Just a tiny psilocybin dose can be soooo helpful.

You can work your way to bigger trips, and to big plant medicines like ayahausca.

But don’t overthink it. You won’t find the answers you’re looking for in your head. Ever. No matter how much you keep searching.

Just face the fear and start with a tiny mushroom dose. That’s it. Low stakes. At home. Chilling. No big deal.

Have an intention. Have a friend to text. Have a playlist and maybe something to write on.

That’s it.

Hi! I hear so much “if he wanted to, he would” and it just seems so simplistic to me. I know sometimes I want to and I don’t, not just about romance but about lots of things in my life.

So for those of you who also wanted to but couldn’t, and still managed to end up with the girl, what happened?

What made you not be able to do it, and how did you end up together anyways?

It started doing that whole thing of writing one sentence at a time per line a few months back, and I can’t deal.

I keep prompting it to only write in full paragraphs, but it either does it for one or two responses then reverts back, or only does it for the first couple paragraphs then goes on to single sentences again.

I tried changing the settings to different tones and such.

I’ve opened new chats.

It’s doing it across the board, no matter the prompt, topic, chat or anything.

I’ve been using Gemini more as a result but i really miss good ole chatGPT.

Any answer for this?

Hello!

Is there such a thing in the city as a weekly bachata class followed by social?

I love bachata, even though I’m more of a beginner.

So I’d love to find a place that does a class first, followed by a social. Just going to classes isn’t worth it to me because it’s usually too much commute and too expensive just for 1h. And I’m not good enough just to go to socials.

Ideally in Manhattan (west side preferably) or Bronx around riverdale. I live in Inwood.

Thanks in advance!

Hi! I’ve taken ayahsuca, MDMA and mushroom trips in the past, always in a therapeutic context.

Most of them led to insights and somatic release, with helpful integration after.

Now, my main focus is to start taking concrete actions towards this goal of mine that really matters to me.

So I was thinking of doing mushrooms with an intention like “Help me follow what is aligned with my actions. Help me move toward my mission concretely. Help me cross the threshold into my mission concretely.”

Has anyone got to taking concrete actions for a goal as a result of a mushroom trip?

I’m not sure if it’s possible as most of my trips were about insights and somatic release more than giving clarity and motivation for the future.

Thanks in advance!

For those of you who used psychedelics as plant medicine, what made you stop?

Did you know you were gonna stop before your last trip, or was it the result of the last trip?

Do you think you stopped for good, or for a chunk of time?

Hi, I’ve been on Asmanex for 15 years and always super stable.

Asmanex I’s being discontinued in France (not sure for the US), so I went to a pulmonologist who switched me to Simbicort as needed.

I immediately started getting bad anxiety, with heart palpitations, shaking, and at times crying. My mental chatter went up, and life just suddenly sucks.

My sleep also went to shit, waking up several times through the night, and last night couldnt even go back to sleep for 2h in the middle of the night.

Normally, I sleep through the night and mental health isnt bad.

For those of you who also got mental health effects from Simbicort, did those ever go away or did you end up switching to another med after a bit?

Thanks in advance!