She’s a rescue dog! I was told she’s a Shih Tzu terrier mix, I have been asked if she had lasso or chihuahua in her. I have to get her tested to see exactly, but I’m curious what you all think! This is her after her hair has been shaved down.
I just went to a party with a close friend, nothing too crazy, everyone was sitting around playing board games and drinking. Ofc the topic of dating came up, and one of the guys there asked me if I’d be okay if a “man I was dating” cancelled plans on me last minute and my friend interjected and said “actually she doesn’t even like men so it doesn’t matter!” And all of the guys that were nearby looked disappointed and offended as if I personally insulted them. Shaking their heads and shit. One started going with the “ohh man, who hurt you?” And he literally had nothing to do with the conversation but felt the need to interject and put me on blast like that. It’s like they were putting me in a position to explain myself but I threw it back like “oh why are you straight? Let’s talk about that” and left shortly after that because I didn’t like the vibes there.
And like I saw my friend kept looking visibly concerned for me because even she knew it was wrong, and felt uncomfortable for me. She never really understood why I don’t announce that I’m lesbian until now. And I actually liked that this happened in front of her because she always thought I was over exaggerating about this exact thing, how men react towards it and how it made me feel unsafe at times.
It isn’t the first time it’s happened where a guy will get visibly upset if they hear I’m not into men and I always find it odd because it’s not like they had a chance with me in the first place. So I try not to let random people (mostly men bc I never really have this issue with women) know that I’m les because they either sexualize it or get irrationally upset for no reason at all.
It sucks I feel I have to somewhat “hide” part of me and it’s easier for me to because for the most part everyone assumes I’m straight (I’m femme and I guess don’t really give any indicators that I’m les) and that could be part of the problem with why most men have a huge reaction when they hear I’m not into them.
So I’m starting to realize the main reason I’m not outwardly “out” is mainly because of straight men.
It’s giving…..??
As the title says… came into work this morning and it was pretty slow so I was checking my phone and my friend had sent me a funny text, I was smirking at my phone as I was replying to her text. One of my coworkers walked by and was like “ohhh look at you over here!” Scooted up closer to me and said “are you watching porn??” And it really didn’t register to me at the moment as to why he would say that to me. We don’t joke around like that. He’s at least 20 years older than me. My reaction was a laugh, only because I was stunned, and then I said “noo I saw something funny!” And he was like “yeah that’s good”
My thing is, I don’t like that and it’s happened hours ago but has still left a bad taste in my mouth. My department is very male dominated and I’ve overheard them saying things that are inappropriate but I tuned it out and just didn’t want to be involved in their jokes or anything at all. This particular coworker that made that joke today has always rubbed me the wrong way. He’s always the one approaching me, not the other way around, and he’s constantly poking fun at me for being skinny. I always feel like I’m verbally held hostage, honestly it is just a lot with him. And he’s seen as zany so nobody really cares if he says weird shit. But I feel like dirty? Not trying to be over dramatic, it’s just I’m now uncomfortable with him when our work relationship was mainly just me tolerating him in the first place.
So… if there comes a next time that he makes me feel uncomfortable I have to shut him down without showing that I’m angry about it or suddenly I’m the dramatic one. Honestly I haven’t been saying much to him because I wanted him to get bored of talking to me and just not talk to me anymore. (I know, that’s backwards) would really like some input on this…