u/MyYakuzaTA

I’m taking a solo trip to Tokyo this winter. I’m looking at places to stay for 7+ days. Last time my ex and I stayed in Shin-Okubo and we really enjoyed our time but it didn’t feel as authentic as id like.

Since now I’m traveling alone, I’m looking for recommendations on what neighborhood to say in that has decent night life (basically chill bars), good food and easy transportation. It would be nice if it’s in a vibrant neighborhood so I can get lost during my day if I want to stay close to where I’m staying.

Non negotiable; must have a Joto Curry 😅

I’d appreciate any recommendations. I’m really excited for this trip. It’s my first solo international trip.

Last week I noticed that my Orion hasn’t been cooling off like it did when I first got it a month ago. I have it at max cold and it’s room temp. I’ll reach out to support in the morning and I know Orion will make it right but dues anyone have any trouble shooting tips to get me through the night?

I just can't.

My STBX and I have been separated for almost a month now, and he lives up the street. We are not mad at each other and things are amicable. I walk the dog on Tuesdays for him when he is working from the office and we still each other every day.

It's ... impossible. I need a clean break so badly. This whole thing would be easier if I didn't have to see him. I'm going to have to tell him I can't walk the dog anymore, and I need space.

I'm planning a vacation when our divorce finalizes in December. I filed our paperwork the other day. Our whole relationship has been me managing him, managing his emotions, managing his time, money, career, all while he was resentful of me for being a nag. Resenting me for having a successful business.

Now I just cry all the time and can hardly work. It's impossible to concentrate and I'm really going through it. I almost wish one of us would have blown up our lives because I feel like anger would be easier to process than this ... friendly divorce.

It only took me two months from our separation date, but I finally filed our paperwork with the court to start the process. I feel incredibly lucky that my ex is willing to file a joint petition and we are doing everything we can to make this process affordable and easy for ourselves. Honestly, I just want it to be over.

Yet, waves of sadness seem to hit me out of the blue. But I finally feel lighter, able to focus again, and claiming space that I've never had.

After 16 years of being together it feels ... great to step out into the world again as a single woman. I hope that we both can find what we are looking for even if that's just figuring out who we are as individuals.

It was so difficult for me to file the paperwork and even though I'm the one who initiated the divorce, as I stood there with the County Clerk, I couldn't help but cry. I don't know if they were tears of relief or sadness, but it was something.

Now we wait 6 months and one day.

Lately, when I tell people that I'm in the process of getting divorced, they mention my glow up, and an event a year ago where everyone (other than me) seemingly "knew I would get a divorce." I appreciate being seen by people who care about me, and I appreciate their kind words, but on some level, it's also heartbreaking because I didn't see what they saw.

It's hard, I've changed so much in the last almost decade, I've lost a ton of weight, had plastic surgery to remove my excess skin, gone to therapy, started working out, have my own successful business. I had always hoped my STBX would come along for the self-improvement journey, but he didn't, and even seemed to resent me along the way.

Hearing people mention my transformation and then mention that they just KNEW I was getting divorced at that point is hard. I didn't know for sure I was getting divorced then, and I wish someone would have said something.

I know that it's my choice, my journey, my life. How much transforming can one person do?
This is just a vent before I crawl into bed and cry for awhile.
I need to fill out the paperwork this weekend. I just cannot bring myself to do it, it feels like a mountain I cannot climb. How can that be possible? How can I have lost over 200lbs, had multiple surgeries, survived a PE, started my own business, and not be able to fill out 2 pages of paperwork?

When my anxiety is bad, all I can do is clean, clean clean. I love feeling like I live in a museum and that I could literally eat off my floor. However, I live alone and sometimes the amount of time I spend cleaning is completely overwhelming.

What are some of the things that you do that help you stay on top of keeping your home, clean and orderly?

I thought I would share some of mine:

- I do laundry the same day every week
- I change out my towel towels on the same day every week
- when I see something dirty, I clean it immediately
- I don’t go to bed with any dirty dishes in my sink
- when I do my dishes in the morning, I’m sure to put away any that are drying
- as soon as I get a box or package, I open it and throw away the box
- I take out my trash if there’s food in it
- if I’m sweeping, I also vacuum
- I put tasks that I forget on my work calendar and set alarms
- I try to only touch things once.
- I open my windows every day, no matter what the weather for at least 20 minutes to let the bad juju out

All of these things end up with me, having an extremely tidy home. What about you?

ETA; the Orion team support has been absolutely wonderful. They contacted me last night and had this resolved by the next day. I appreciate them working with me even outside of business hours. Honestly, this level of customer service is hard to find with other companies and I’m deeply appreciative. Thank you so much for all your support and care.

OnTrac has been attempting deliveries since Saturday. I provided Orion with my phone number and I updated on track with my gate code. However, neither on track or Orion support is able to help me in a timely manner. Per on track now, my delivery is going to be returned to Orion, which is going to cause a 5 to 7 day delay. Per Orion I just need to wait longer to hear back from anybody about my issue.

I’m SO frustrated. OnTrac is the only delivery that has issues delivering to where I live. Everyone else business code. all I wanna do is be able to sleep again and talk to somebody who can actually help me which is apparently not on track or Orion. Why did I spend $2000 on something when I could’ve bought an eight sleep for the $750 off for Memorial Day?

Today my ex-husband is moving out of our condo. I have so many mixed feelings it is wild.

Part of me is excited to claim my space as my own and start my life the way that I want to. Free of his criticism and just on my own. another part of me is absolutely terrified to be alone.

He is taking the dog that is very blonde to me and while I adopted another dog two weeks ago, I feel so incredibly sad. As we’ve started to go through this process and even before that I’ve been able to grieve our relationship but now it really feels real.

His side of the dresser is empty. His closet is empty.

I’m going to spend the weekend doing a deep clean and completely decluttering. For whatever reason whenever I look around all I see is a mess and it makes me insane.

It’s such a strange feeling. We’ve been together for over 16 years and it all officially ends today. I can’t believe that tonight I will be sleeping alone in a new bed.

I know that’ll be fine and this is what I wanted but here we go. Wish me luck.

My STBXH and I are going through such different emotions when it comes to the divorce. I feel awful for him, but at the same time, I just cannot - do everything for him anymore. He is moving out on Friday and I am giving him a huge amount of things that I purchased before we were ever together to help him. I'm also physically helping him move.

But the tension at home is so high. I wish I could speed up time and that it was Friday already. I'm ready to clean everything, paint the bathroom, get a new rug.

I just need to move on.
After being in this relationship for 16+ years and doing EVERYTHING, the cooking, cleaning, domestic chores, and having a completely dead bedroom - I cannot hear what I've done wrong. I've been supportive and kind, but it was never good enough for him.

I've been staying at my mom's house while he's out of town and I am officially home tomorrow. I don't know how I'll navigate those days other than being out of the house as much as possible.

I don't have much support around me, no friends really. I'm sorry for the rambling vent, I just don't have anyone to talk to. I keep trying to tell him, this isn't failure, life has seasons and ours changed at different times. There's no going back.

He's finally consulting an attorney.

I know he needs time to grieve and realize that it's truly over, I just wish he could do it in his own space, while giving me mine. I'm so tired. I'm just so tired.

In a woman going through perimenopause and I’ve been having difficulty sleeping for about a year now. I wake up every night just congested in sweat or too cold.

My mom has an 8 sleep I’ve been sleeping in for the last week and I’ve never had better sleep.

They are incredibly expensive. Does anyone have any thoughts or experiences with this system to help me make a decision on whether I should get one or not?

In a woman going through perimenopause and I’ve been having difficulty sleeping for about a year now. I wake up every night just congested in sweat or too cold.

My mom has an 8 sleep I’ve been sleeping in for the last week and I’ve never had better sleep.

They are incredibly expensive. Does anyone have any thoughts or experiences with this system to help me make a decision on whether I should get one or not?

About 10 years ago, (6 years into my relationship) I went on a massive weight loss and heath journey. At the time, doctors and therapists told me that my long term relationship may end statistically. I didn’t really think much of it. With therapy, weight loss, and time, I realized that things that were ok with me when I was overweight, like being treated poorly, not having physical affection, never receiving compliments, was no longer ok with me. As my weight dropped, my self esteem healed.

I expected my husband to be able to keep up with the changes, or love the new version of me, but he didn’t. And you can’t really expect someone else to change.

At the end of the day, I lost 230lbs. I had skin removal, went to therapy and now I truly love myself. My friends and family say that as soon as I started losing weight, they knew my relationship/marriage was over. I don’t know.

I read online that a big sign of someone moving on from their relationship or marriage is improving their physical image. Is that a bad thing? Was I wrong to think that he’d love this version of me?

Will anyone appreciate this version of me?

I wasn't sure what flair to use.

My ex and I have an amicable divorce. He's moving out in a just over two weeks. I'm not mad at him, he's a great friend and I hope that we can remain friends, but looking into the future, I don't know what to do about social media.

I'm not active on Facebook but I am on IG, and almost all my posts that have pictures of me, are with him. I'm not trying to erase my past, but how do you move on from that? Delete the posts? Delete the pictures?

Part of my healing process is cleaning and purging. I just need to do it. This includes removing our mementos, pictures from the wall - but also IG? I know it will hurt him to see that I've done that and I don't want to hurt his feelings. I just ...

What did you do?

My ex and I still live together - he’s moving out in a few weeks. This process has been so amicable. He’s taking the dog that I love more than anything, and I may be adopting a dog tomorrow. We were together for 16 years.

But I’m so depressed. Deeply.
I have a situationship and it’s a long story but he’s the only one who checks in on me emotionally. My best friends barely talk to me. My sister is across the country.

I want to throw away all my things.
I want a clean start.
I go to bed at 7pm. I’m never like this.
I’m not myself.

When will I feel better? When he moves out? In weeks, months, next year?