u/Nice_Look_2634

Hi all! Me (31) and my partner (38) will celebrate our first anniversary soon. After previous failed relationships and years of being single we’re both pretty convinced we found the love of our life in eachother. It’s the most beautiful, safe and stable relationship I’ve event been in.
I’m 100% sure I want to marry that woman.

I want to have children, she expressed that she wants to have family with me too. It’s early days but we’re both in an agreement that we want to get married first and buy a house (as it’s quite hard to get a house in south England anyway, not speaking when you already have a child and your affordability and income lowers). From my calculations we need 2-3 years to achieve these goals first.

BUT I feel so safe and loved I’m experiencing intense baby fever (I would carry). I read, research and worry about IVF, IUIs, my age (I have PCOS too), timelines… I know we’re early in relationship but our age and the fact we can’t just get pregnant like hetero Couples and it requires so much resources and planning doesn’t help. I look at babies around me, my friends having babies and it just makes me sad. I want to be a mother so much.

Anyone experienced it? How did you deal with it?

My girlfriend and I (30F & 38F) had a disagreement and very emotional conversation. We talked it through, apologised, and thought we’d resolved it. But later that night, after we turned the lights off, she suddenly started shaking, crying uncontrollably, punched the wall, and headbutted the wall.

When I’m telling you I was scared, I was terrified. That never happened before, we’re 1y together and planning to move in next month.

She said she was extremely overwhelmed and just wanted to stop crying. When she saw how scared I was she was very regretful and apologised and hugged me all night. She said she decided to to to therapy to work on herself.

I’m shaken and don’t know if I’m overreacting or if this is a serious red flag. Has anyone experienced something similar? How would you interpret this situation?

Im estranged from my dad for two years now. And me and my mum talk briefly maybe twice a year so we don’t have much of a relationship. I was always hoping my auntie will become my mum but she failed to visit me for 7 years now (I live abroad) and slowly stopped calling.

I just feel so lonely. Like I’m alone in the world. I have a living partner although I feel like she can’t understand because she’s very close with her family. And I have two sisters but they have their own lives.

I wish I had a nice family I can share things with. Me and my gf are moving in together and I don’t have a parent to share it with. Father’s Day triggered me too.

Just ranting 😞

My (31F) partner (38F) suffers with severe vaginismus. She is unable to have anything inserted into her vagina to the point she never had smear test (unless under sedation). I should add that ultrasound that she had under sedation still left her in pain afterwards with bleeding.

She expressed she would like for us to try for a baby through reciprocal IVF rule but also highlighted she is open and would love any baby that is ours but not necessarily biologically hers.

We recently had a serious conversation about it and after doing research I shared with her that she will need to undergo multiple transvaginal ultrasounds and egg retrieval. She said she can’t do it. And we were discussing if it’s worth it, the trauma and pain it might I flick on her. She is now quite down and angry at her body not being able to be “normal”. I reassured her that it’s not her fault and I love her the way she is. That I want to be parents with her and I don’t care if it’s her biological child.

But I want to make sure there are no other options. Are there any people here with vaginismus that went through egg retrieval? What’s the reality of it? Maybe it’s possible to be sedated for each one?

Hi all (tldr below),

My girlfriend and I are moving in together soon. I’m in therapy and actively working on my communication and mental health, while she’s very openminded and interested in self development.

One challenge in our relationship is that she struggles with self esteem, expressing her feelings, and setting boundaries with her family. She was parentified from a young age and feels responsible for everyone around her. She often feels guilty when she can’t help, becomes overwhelmed by family obligations, and has told me she sometimes feels trapped by those responsibilities. We’ve talked about this many times, and she usually becomes emotional because it’s clearly something that causes her a lot of stress. I sometimes get frustrated by her difficulty setting boundaries, and she interprets that as me wanting her to abandon her family, which isn’t the case.

I’ve discussed this with my therapist and feel that therapy could really help her. My concern is that she doesn’t have anyone to talk to about her feelings apart from me, and I sometimes feel overwhelmed being her only emotional outlet. I know therapy only works if someone wants it for themselves (I know she considered it in the past), so how can I raise the idea in a supportive way that explains why I think it could benefit her and our relationship, while still making it clear that the choice is entirely hers?

TLDR: My girlfriend and I are moving in together, and I’m concerned about her struggles with boundaries, emotional expression, and family pressure due to long-term people-pleasing and parentification, and I’m wondering how to suggest therapy in a supportive, non-pressuring way.

Hi all! Me (31) and my partner (38) will celebrate our first anniversary soon. After previous failed relationships and years of being single we’re both pretty convinced we found the love of our life in eachother. It’s the most beautiful, safe and stable relationship I’ve event been in.
I’m 100% sure I want to marry that woman.

I want to have children, she expressed that she wants ti have family with me too. It’s early days so we’re not planning family yet, we’re both in an agreement that we want to get married first.

BUT I feel so safe and loved I’m experiencing intense baby fever (I would carry). I read, research and stress about IVF costs, possible reciprocal IVF and her age, timelines… I know we’re early in relationship but our age and the fact we can’t just get pregnant like hetero
Couples and it requires so much resources and planning doesn’t help.

Anyone experienced it? How did you deal with it?

Me (31) and my girlfriend (38) are planning to start a family in next 3-5 years. We both agree that we want a family. She doesn’t want to be pregnant. I’m in two minds (long history of postpartum depression in my family + body image issues + overall fear) about giving birth but if we did it we would probably with her egg first.

We’re both open to an idea of adopting a child as well.

How do we decide? How to be confident in a decision?
It all requires so much planning I feel like decision will have to be made in the next couple of years.

How did you decide?

Edit: I’m in UK