u/No_Lettuce2483

I’ve been really struggling with OCD recently, and it’s affecting my relationship a lot. It’s gotten to the point where every day I feel awful in my relationship, we do have some problems but I’ve come to the conclusion the things that are making me feel so terrible day to day are all being caused by OCD and not something he’s done. I have a really bad issue with fixating and obsessing over his past, and it’s gotten to the point when I feel weird sleeping with him or wearing jumpers he’s given me because I’m so fixated and obsessed with the girls he’s been with before. Like he gave me a jumper when we first met, and I used to go through his phone EXTENSIVELY because I was convinced he was cheating on me (he’s never done anything to make me think he would cheat) but I was so obsessed with the idea I would spend nearly 3 hours searching his whole phone every night we were together to see if he was cheating and also to see everything from his past…. I know I’m not proud of it. But I found a photo of him with his ex and he was wearing the jumper he gave me and ever since I’ve never been able to wear it or look at it because all I can think about is how another girl has touched this jumper. But I’m really struggling and I’m hurting my relationship because I can’t stop interrogating him about his past, and it got to the point where he said if I keep asking him he’s going to break up with me because he can’t handle talking to me about all these things anymore. And he also knows how much it’s hurting me. And I found out that he slept with a girl on Halloween and he slept with her in this field near his house, and I nearly threw up because I’ve walked through that field with him so much and now the idea of going near it makes me freak out because I know he’s been with another girl there… it was literally 4 years ago btw.

But anyway, I’ve brung up ocd before to him (like small comments not about myself) and he has no idea what it is and thinks it something to do with being clean. And idk if he will be willing to fully understand it if I talk to him about it, especially because it’s something I’ve struggled really badly with my whole life. But it’s kind of gotten to the point where we both feel like the relationship has become really weird and tense and I just keep saying sorry I’m a bit off right now and I feel like I should tell him because it’s affecting me SO much and our relationship.

me and my boyfriends have been going through a really bad rough patch, and we had a lot of problems and we nearly broke up, and before that he was being so mean and rude to me. like the way he was talking to me was discusting. i was constantly someone he had to talk to and he just turned so mean. we nearly broke up 2 times in the same day, and the second time we had this massive talk and it went really really well and we both agreed the relationship was not working for either of us but we both wanted to rebuild and grown with each other and he was really committed to changing and he didn't just forget the conversation he was constantly asking what i needed and how to deal with all of our issues and how to grow and change, and things were finally so good for about 5 days. then yesterday he woke up and it of no where everything was so bad. he was being SO rude to me and he did so many things and was so off and so so so awful. I'm away right now, and he'[s been really insecure and worrying about me being hit on so i gave him some space at the start and was saying things like "talk to me when you are ready x" and he called me a few hours later and that's when he was acting so awful. i was so exited and so happy when i felt like we were both committed to working on our relationship and not even 5 days later h goes back to this and refuses to tell me anything is wrong. I'm so gutted and i just cant do any of this anymore. I'm away right now on this really expensive course for uni and i feel like its been impacted so harshly because of him, and i know when i get back I'm going to break up with him because i gave him a chance to change and not even a week later things have gone back to how they were. I'm exhasted and I'm so gutted because i know i cant do this to myself and carry on letting him treat me like this. i've made so many sacrifices for him, and done so much for him and he doesn't realise at all nor care about me at all. i have every intenton of breaking up with him, but its just hit me all at once. he used to be so caring and so kind and make me feel so loved and so cared for and i have no clue how i ended up in this mess and how the man i loved and gave so much to is treating me like I'm nothing to him. he was my first real boyfriend, first everything and I'm so heart broken that its turned out like this. i don't know how he can be so cruel to me after everything we shared together. and it was so random as well. I didn't do anything at all and he woke up and just hated me. the morning before and night before he was acting completly normal and he was caring, asking when we can see each other again since I'm away, and now he's gone cold and I'm so gutted and just so hurt. i know i cant stay with him but i don't want to be alone and i don't want to go through the breakup because i know how gutted I'm going to be.

Me and my boyfriend have been together for about 6 months, and we have ALOT of problems. Like a lot a lot. We struggle with arguments, communication and he has a lot of bad habits that affect me in the relationship. We’re long distance but we see each other very regularly, and he came over for a month and at the end of the month we were just constantly arguing, constantly having problems and when he gets angry he has a tendency to get aggressive. He struggles with it most when he’s playing games but when we’re in person he started doing more and more things like slamming doors and throwing things like his phone or bag around. Obviously when I told my friends this they were all extremly adamant on me breaking up with him and all are worried about my safety. But I do want to say that he’s never hit me or never showed signs or hitting me or gotten close to hurting me, but he does get aggressive when angry. On top of all these other problems all of my friends are obviously upset that I’m still with him. This is also my first serious relationship, and I struggle with putting up harsh boundaries and communicating the way I need to, but he also avoids talking about serious problems and always shuts down when they are brung up. We have been going through a rough patch for the last 3/4 weeks and yesterday he tried to break up with me, then I convinced him to work on things with me, then I went out with some of my friends and decided it was time we broke up because I didn’t see any of these issues changing because I don’t believe he will work on them.

So I told EVERYONE I was breaking up with him, told them all the worst parts of our relationship (there are ALOT of them) and made a lot of jokes making his violence sound incredibly bad (it’s not good but I was making it sound worse then it is) and then I went over to my friends house and tried to break up with him and we had the only honest conversation we have had EVER. We actually spoke about everything, I came down really hard on him about his problems with anger and it hit him in a really deep spot and I told him if he doesn’t change then I’m not being with someone who acts like this. We spoke about everything because I have really bad issues with not trusting him, not being able to talk to him about things that are bothering me and also him not responding to any of my attempts the way he should. He started saying he was going to change and all these things, and we hung up then I called him back and tried to end things again because my friend was obviously adamant on us breaking up and i just couldn’t do it. He started promising All these things and I finally felt like I told him everything that had been building up over the last 6 months. And we sorted most of them out in this like 2 hour conversation. (Kind of but he now knows how I feel and he is promising to work on all of them with me) and when I got home my friend was obviously really annoyed because I went over to her house to break up with him and she just sat there listening to a conversation about us fixing things. I went home and called him and we spoke about everything and not just speaking about it like he was directing the conversation and asking how we change all of our bad habits and agreed to work on his anger and find another way to deal with his anger especially while he’s playing games or during an argument. But I had told EVERYONE I was breaking up with him ON THAT DAY so I text everyone and said I broke up with him because the hassle I would have gotten would have been awful and I know how badly he’s been treating me and how angry and disappointed my friends will be with me if I told them we are going to work things out instead of me just ending it. Including the friend who listened to the whole conversation and she’s dating his friends so she will obviously find out I lied and I’m feeling so awful about it because I’ve been texting her acting like I’m devastated that we actually broke up.

I’m going away for the next 3 weeks and I have 6 weeks where I don’t have to really talk to a lot of them. I was so ready to break up with him the whole day and when I get upset I exaggerate everything and the whole day I was just shit talking him and telling my friends weird things he had done or stuff he had said that was out of context but it was also something that was weird. I know how stupid I look, I know how dumb I sound but i feel so awful for lying to my best friend about all of this. It’s only been like 3 hours and the guilt is already eating me alive. But the conversation we had was so promising and hes started to already show actual interest in changing. Asking what I need in arguments and disagreements, how to handle different things and I have been incredibly harsh on all of my boundries that he was always on the line of. I know how stupid I sound for believing he will change but I love him so much and i want to give it another chance but i can’t lie to my friends forever and i can’t tell them i lied and im still with him. I’m very aware ive put myself in this situation and I’ve involved all of my friends into my relationship drama and it’s genuinely started to affect my best friend because she’s always listening to every single problem we have and watched me say all these things then still stay with him.

I want to give my relationship one last try and see if he actually changes and obviously if he doesn’t I will end things, but the conversation we had was so promising and I believe he wants to change his behaviour because now he knows I’m not willing to put up with it.

Me and my boyfriend are long distance, and we just spent a month together and we are going through a bit of a rough patch. This is one of my first relationships and we have quite a few problems and before we saw each-other we were just non stops roguing and then we saw eachother and it was all normal for 2 weeks then the last 2 weeks of the stay we were constantly arguing over small things. He started doing things like removing posts of me on his Instagram and he changed his phone background from a picture of me to a default background. Then he sat me down and said he no longer felt like doing anything sexual because he was “tired” and usually we are very sexually active because we see each-other so little but he said he wanted to stop it all together. (We still did some stuff but like once every few days when we used to sleep together up to 3 times a day and he would always be the one who initiated it) and we were just arguing tones and he did a lot of things that really hurt me like he lied to me about a few things from his past and then when he went back home he asked for space and said he had no energy and wanted to text and call less and only call at night. That was about 4/5 days ago and the space has been eating me alive. I spoke to him about it and said I was really worried and he said I had nothing to worry about and none of his feelings had changed, the month together was just a lot and he wanted some down time. But I can’t help but still feel terrible. I know that he loves me, but he’s done nothing but show me he’s losing feelings. Weather he said he isn’t or not, but I have a really hard time communication how I’m actually feeling and that’s what was causing so many of our arguments.

I don’t know how to tell him that I feel like he hates me half the time, or that I feel genuinely unloved in this relationship and I want him to do some things to show me that he loves me not just telling me. Because he’s noticed I’ve been off and it’s just putting more and more space inbetween us because I’m pulling away and then he’s noticing somethings wrong and he kept asking me if I even missed him or if I was starting to hate him and I feel so bad because all I’ve been doing is missing him to the point it’s eating me alive but telling him this feels pointless. I don’t want to have to beg him to give me more attention and the second I ask for anything it feels worthless because I know I asked him to treat me like he loves me.

And before anyone even suggests breaking up please don’t the last thing I want is to break up with him I just want to feel closer to him. So any break up advice will just be ignored.

Ok basically, me and my best friend have always been very very close and about half a year ago we both got into a relationships and the guy in with is the first guy I’ve ever properly dated, and we have quite a few issues and we argue alot but it’s started to make me and my best friend drift apart. I went through like a month or two where the relationship was really draining because we’re long distance, we hadn’t seen each other for a while and I’m super insecure when it comes to relationships and I couldn’t communicate how I actually felt so it just ended in constant arguments. I was talking to my best friend about all of it and I was relying on her too much and put all of my relationships onto her by accident and we’ve spoken about it and I apologised because I realised how much I was relying on her and how it was actually affecting her. But recently me and my boyfriend have been arguing quite a bit over just little stuff and my best friend HATES him so every time I talk to her we end up talking about him and she just makes rude comments about him, constantly tells me to break up with him and I just constantly feel so judged for staying with him and I constantly feel pressured to break up with him when I’m not going to or don’t want to.

I definetly got her too involved in my relationship and like I said I’ve done a lot of reflection and realised I was being too much by constantly ranting to her like literally every day just upset and confused with my own issues and it did get too much, and I know exactly why she is telling me to break up with him and I know she’s doing it because she loves me but it’s just too much. Like every time I post a photo of us together, she will always reply to it saying mean things and we used to do stuff like that as a joke but now she’s dead serious and every time she is in the same room as him or talking to him she’s constantly digging into him and just being rude to him, he retaliates and I always defend her and tell him to not be rude to her but I also have the some conversations with her in private and ever time we have the same conversation, we go out again and I have to remind her like 10 times to stop being rude and saying shit to him. It was my birthday to other day and I posted a photo of the flowers he bought me and she replied just saying “omg wow he did the bare fucking minimum” it was just too much and she’s constantly judging him and she isn’t judging me directly but she’s so involved (and I know it was my fault for getting her involved in the first place) but every conversation I have with her I just feel like she’s making back handed comments about him and about me for staying with him and it’s genuinely constant just lectures and constant comments about how I should break up with him.

Her family is also incredibly involved. There was this whole incident where me and my boyfriend got into an argument and we were living together while my parents were away, and he was going to go home after the argument because it got really heated and I called her over because I didn’t want to spend the night alone and she brung her older sister and he ended up coming back, they started calling my parents telling them that I wasn’t allowed to stay in my house alone with him and that they weren’t leaving without me and then her older sister called the police for genuinely no reason at ALL it was so uncalled for because my parents were away and her older sister was on the phone saying all this stuff and saying that they wouldn’t let me stay in my house anymore and I had to go to their house and then they were going to book my boyfriend a hotel and he came back, and we were upstairs talking and making up because we had just had a huge argument and she thought he was refusing to leave so she called the police and they made me stay at their house for the night and then her other sister kept sitting me down and saying I had to make the “right decision” and they were constantly pressuring me to break up with him over an argument that they esculated and that me and my boyfriend had already made up over. I went home and we just kept staying together because we were over the argument and made up and had a whole conversation about it and when I told her I didn’t break up with him she started texting me saying “I can’t help you anymore you had your chance to leave and you just didn’t” and every time it’s just constant pressure and lectures about how I’m wrong for staying with him.

Me and my boyfriend do have quite a few problems but it’s my relationship and she started texting all my other friends telling them what happened and now all my other friends just wont stop making comments and constantly telling me to break up with him and judging me for staying with him and her whole family is doing the same. She also always compares her relationship to mine like every time we have an argument or something she always says “we’ve been together for the same amount of time and we don’t have this issue.”

I completely understand where she’s coming from but my relationship is my relationship and a lot of the arguments were coming from both of us and a lot of my insecurity’s and miscommunication and it’s something I want to work on instead of just breaking up with him when I don’t want to do that at all. Now every time she calls me or texts me I’m just dry or when we call I get burnt out and just run out of social battery and hang up decently fast because it’s the same conversation over and over and it’s making me just not want to talk to her if all of our conversations are going to be talking about my boyfriend and how I should leave him. Then she called me last night and started saying “u are neglecting your friendships and your whole life to be with him and you need to prioritise your friends over him” because he was staying with me for a month and i was spending a lot of time with him obviously because we were living together for a month straight. And me and her WERE calling and texting and hanging out throughout the whole month and I would see her maybe 2/3 times a week and call and text her every day but after the whole argument it was just the same conversation so I pulled back and now she’s just constantly telling me how I’ve changed and how im putting my whole life on hold for him when im doing nothing differently. It’s the summer so im not doing anything and I’ve been so stressed with my relationship and a time of other things that I just haven’t had the energy or social battery to talk to a lot of people but I still make and effort to see all my friends it’s just a bit less while I was with my boyfriend.

I get she’s worried about me and it’s all coming from a place of love but it genuinely is just draining me on-top of everything else I’ve got going on right now and it’s too much and when I try to pull away for some space she lectures me again about how I’m ruining my life and friendships for a boyfriend after I was a bit dry with her for like 3 days.

Basically, I have a really big problem with my boyfriends past and Its something I’ve always been jealous and insecure over. He’s had a lot more relationships and slept with a lot of people before me, but he’s the first person I’ve ever done anything with besides kiss. He’s told me about every time he’s slept with someone and there was 2 one night stands with two different girls that he slept with at parties when he was really drunk, and the others were girls he was in serious relationships with but he’s only ever slept with one girl more then once and it was over 5 years ago when he was younger. But there’s this one time he hates talking about. He got black out drink and slept with his friends girlfriend when they were on a break and he specifically hates talking about it (he doesn’t like talking about any of them but there’s a very big difference in the way he talks about this specific situation) and I’m not entirely sure he consented or remembers consenting so naturally it’s something he doesn’t like bringing up because he blacked out and woke up the next morning and found out what happened. He deeply regrets most of the times he slept with people because he was drunk for most of them. I never found out who the girl was and never pushed. He’s been very transparent about that since we first started dating.

Now for the second part of the story, he has this friend (who’s a girl) and he’s always said that they were just friends and that they had been friends for years and I’ve never once worried about her because he has a lot of friends who are girls and I have a lot of friends who are Boys and he’s never given me a reason to not trust him, he still talks to this girl and goes out 1 on 1 with her every few months and again it’s never something I’ve ever thought about or cared about. Then we were talking a few weeks ago and I found out the dated and he never told me. I was upset but he said they never even kissed and it was only for a few weeks so I forgot about it and moved on. Then we were talking yesterday and he mentioned her and his best friend used to date and the friend has only ever had 2 serious girlfriends and she was the first one, and I immidetly put 2 and 2 together and realised she was the one he slept with. I asked him and he kept denieng it saying that it wasn’t her and I just thought he must have been talking about another friend and I got them mixed up, and he started this speech saying he would never sit here and lie to me and he kept saying she wasn’t the girl he slept with, then finally admitted that it was in fact her and then got mad at me because it’s not something he liked to talk about and I was pushing him to tell me, which I apolagised for and said I never meant to push and what not. But I’m extremly upset over the fact he lied and I kept finding out more and more details. It went from they were just friends and never anything more, to they dated, to they slept together. And he still talks to her and I can’t tell him not to, but I feel so uncomfterble with him seeing her especially going out with her alone and spending time with her when I know they slept together before.

I already have a massive issue with dealing with his past and I just feel so defeated and conflicted because I have no clue what to actually do. I don’t want to bring it up again because he hates talking about it and I want to respect that, but I’m also so hurt that he lied to me on 3 separate occasions and he still talks to her and sees her.

Basically, me and my boyfriend are long distance so we see eachother every month and tomorrow he’s coming over to mine to stay for a few weeks, and last week we got into a really bad fight and since then everything has been off. My main issue is I can’t bring stuff up because when I talk to him about my feelings he shuts me down, refuses to admit his actions hurt me and calls me pathetic. I’m on the verge of breaking up with him but I want to give it one last go before I decide to actually break it off because I love him a lot, but this morning I brung up something he did which made me really uncomfortable and he completly shut down and hasn’t spoken to me all day, and he leaves in 11 hours to come to mine. We call every night and tonight I called him and things just went south and it ended in me saying that things are Obviosuly not ok and he told me to leave him alone so I am, but I’m so worried he won’t leave his house tomorrow to come to mine because when he gets in these moods he will literally shut down completely. He’s already paid for these tickets and everything and saved up a lot of money but I don’t think it will change anything. So tomorrow, if he comes down I will give this relationship one last go and try really hard to make things work but if he doesn’t, I’m going to break up with him and tell him things aren’t working out. I feel so awful like I can’t sleep and I just don’t know what will happen tomorrow and I do love him a lot but recently our relationship has been so awful so I actually am freaking out right now. This isn’t exactly a post where I’m asking a direct question but I just need to rant because I feel so awful and I’m so worried and on edge because I have no clue what’s gonna happen and if we break up I know I’m going to genuinly be depressed for atleast a month I’m going to feel so awful.

Me and my boyfriend had quite a bad argument, and it made me look at him a lot differently. The argument itself was bad we were yelling at eachother, and when I get upset I tend to get really clingy and when he gets upset he gets really overwhelmed and just shuts down so I was sending him paragraphs trying to sort things out and he was acting really cold and nearly blocked me and was just being really rude but I understand he was upset and he apologised after but the actual thing we were arguing over was such a stupid argument, basically his friends were saying bad things about me and he just couldn’t understand why I was upset this random guy I’ve barley spoken to was calling me all these slurs and calling me ugly behind my back and to my boyfriend, and he just stood up for the guy and wouldn’t admit that he was wrong. I asked him just to stand up for me if he said something that he knew would upset me and he just refused. We got over the argument, but ever since then it’s just been one thing after another and it’s genuinly just all these small things and I’m so upset about all of them and I can’t talk to him about it because he just thinks I’m accusing him and shuts down and he just can’t admit he’s wrong so he will defend himself and not even try to understand why I’m upset of take into consideration how I feel. We ushally have little things like this (not a big argument) but just small things that last for a few hours and it’s just been so much recently and we’re long distance so we haven’t seen each other in a little over a month and I see him again in 4 days and he’s staying over for a month… I feel so weird now and I just can’t look at him the same way and I want to feel like I’m in love with him again but I just see alll the arguments and how he’s made me feel the past few days. We’ve always had a lot of problems, and a lot of them were coming from my insecurities but I just want to look at him and feel comfterble and loved, we are acting normal again, and I do like talking to him and spending time with him but my trust in him has been damaged, and things before this argument were genuinly really really good. I was getting over all the issues with overthinking we’re basically gone, and I felt so secure in the relationship because I had a massive issue where the second we got a little annoyed I would genuinly freak out start sobbing and nearly throw up because I was convinced we would break up. I don’t want to feel this way about him, I want to love him again fully and look at him and see all the really good parts of our relationship but right now I can’t remember any of them. I even feel weird thinking about sleeping with him and doing all these intimate things with him, because I just feel really indifferent to him right now and I don’t want to feel this way anymore. I don’t know what to do because I feel so worn out and so burnt out because all I’ve been doing is trying to make this relatiobhsip work and work through all my own insecurities which were a REALLY REALLY bad problem but i just want to feel normal around him again, and I don’t know if I ever will.

Just a disclosure as well I don’t want to just be told to break up with him, because it is something I’m debating but I want to give this relationship my all before I end it because I do love him a lot, and I’d rather try my hardest and if it doesn’t work and things are like this by the end of summer I’m going to end things, but I’m hoping this is just a rough patch.

Me and my boyfriend just had a huge fight, I was really upset over something and I brung it up and he completely disagreed with what I brung up (it was a specific thing but I don’t want to go into detail) and then I added my friend and his friend who are also dating because the issue also included them and my friend started saying stuff to him and it escalated the situation so much more and me and him started yelling at eachother and my friend told him he’s treating me awfully and he just ended the call, then he called me back like 15 minutes later because we call every single night and he said he’s calling me because we always call but he’s still mad at me and my friend, and in my opinion he’s in the wrong and I wanted to resolve the issue so I tried to have a long and calm conversation with him explaining my side but it made things a bit worse and I’ve had a lot of talks with him about reassurance because things like this make me feel AWFUL and usually they aren’t as bad as this argument, but I said I really wanted reassurance that he still loved me and that everything was fine and he just said everything wasn’t fine and that we were still arguing and that he just didn’t feel like saying I love you at the time and I kept asking him to talk and he was in a really bad mood and he’s really stubborn and reluctant and he ended up hanging up on me after an hour of me trying to sort things out, and ever since then I haven’t been able to sleep or do anything. I feel awful. I feel so weird and sick and awful like I’m fully willing to give up my whole argument even tho I know he’s in the wrong and it’s over something pretty fundamental but I just can’t bare to be in an argument I just want things to go back to normal again, and we’re long distance so we see eachother every month or so, and he comes over to mine for a month in 9 days and he hasn’t booked his ticket yet and I’m so worried this means he doesn’t love me anymore or he wants to end things, and I’m half expecting to wake up blocked. I have really bad issues with this, like every time we get into a little debate or his tone shifts if anything I literally convince myself we’re breaking up but now we’re actually arguing and he’s upset and asleep and it’s the middle of the night and I can’t sleep at all, nothing I do is helping and I have to be up in 4 hours but I just can’t sleep without him on the phone and this is all pathetic but I’m so upset and nauseous idk what to do and I’m so angry and I just need to vent but I just want to talk to him again and I want things to be fine and I’m so worried we will break up over this. I can’t sleep at all and it’s making me feel 10x worse and I just need advice on anything because I don’t know if things will be ok, and I don’t know if he will chose to try with this relationship and I’m so scared I just don’t know what to do.

This is a really weird post and I don’t know exactly what I’m asking for but none of my friends are up, and I have no one to talk to and I just miss him and idk what to do.

I’m diabetic so I’m really prone to things like thrush and UTIs and i saw my boyfriend about 2 weeks ago and now im sure i have thrush and i just got some treatment for it, but i was talking to my mum and she said if i have it then he has it too and i need to tell him to go to the chemist and get some treatment for it. Its not like a really bad infection and its extremely easy to treat and I’ve been on antibiotics recently so I know why I have it, but I don’t know if I had it when I saw him. I didn’t have a lot of symptoms but I never really noticed anything until recently. I’m on the implant too so we don’t use condoms or anything and we don’t see each other often so when we do see each other we sleep together a lot, but I looked it up and it said it’s rare to actually give your partner thrush because it’s not considered a STI. He hasn’t mentioned any symptoms but I don’t know if that’s something he would actually share with me because we’re really close and it’s not unusual for us to talk about this stuff, but I don’t think it would be someone he would even flag or bring up unprompted. I really don’t want to have this conversation and tell him I might have given him something. Thrush can go away on its own and there’s a low chance he has it anyway, but I feel like I still need to bring it up because it’s his health and if he does have it he will just pass it back to me next time I see him because I’m really prone to getting it. Any advice on how to have this conversation or whether I should tell him or not?

I’ve always struggled with OCD, it affects every aspect of my life but it’s something I’ve learnt to deal with and I have very efficient coping mechanisms for when I do get into a spiral but I just got into a new relationship and now it’s affecting my whole relationship. I obsess over his past so much. I think about it every time I speak to him and every time I’m not speaking to him. I literally think about it every day and I’ve never dealt with this form of OCD before so none of my usual coping mechanisms work. I can’t stop looking up his ex’s accounts, imagining him with them or every time I speak to him and he does something sweet all I can think about it if he’s said or done it with one of his ex’s before. I want to stop it because it’s starting to ruin my relationship but I just can’t. How the hell do I stop.

Me and my boyfriend have been dating for a little over 4 months and I have never really dated anyone before and he’s been in a lot of long term relationships, and as we’ve become closer and the relatiobhsip has become more serious I’ve started to get really jelouse of his past girlfriends. For some context I have really bad OCD and it’s something I’ve always struggled with and I saw somewhere that retroactive jelpusy is a form of OCD, I don’t know how true that is but it might explain why I’m finding it so hard to let go of. I’m also fully aware this is a me problem and I really want to get over it because I don’t want this relatiobhsip to end because of this, but I’m having a hard time trying to get over it this all started because I found a photo of him and his ex together on a friends Instagram page from this time last year, and ever since then it’s just gotten worse and worse. I started getting nosey and looking up their instagram accounts and then it got really bad and I literally couldn’t talk to him because all I could think about was how every single thing he’s done with me he’s done with AT LEAST one other girl. He’s had 7 relationships, slept with at-least 6 people and I’ve had like 2 talking stages a year ago that lasted like a week and never went further. I spoke to him about it and it made things worse. I got an in depth time line of every girl he’s been with and the conversation ended with him just getting upset because he knew how hurt I was and he hated that his past made me feel that way. It went away for like a week but not it’s come back even worse and it’s all I can think about and I just keep picturing him and all these girls together and I can’t stop stalking their accounts and every time I see a girl he’s been with all I can think about is him being the way he is with me, with them and it makes me feel genuinely sick to my stomach. He also has this thing where he doesn’t really like making out for long periods of time, which is fine but it’s like 10 seconds max and he’s told me how him and his ex’s have made out for hours on end. He doesn’t bring them up after our conversation but before he made a few comments like we were picking a movie to watch and he suggested a film he watched with his first proper girlfriend and like first EVERYTHING and said how they watched it together and made out for the whole film and he wanted to watch it again. Then he said stuff about how he wanted to try braiding my hair because his first girlfriend taught him how to and like little things like that. He also still has all of them on Snapchat and after our conversation he said he blocked all of them because he knew it made me unconfterble but it’s just made things 10x worse. Every time I talk to him all I can think about is his ex’s, every time I’m not talking to him it’s all I’m thinking about. When we’re together and doing stuff like cuddling or sleeping together all I can think of is how many girls he’s done it with before and it makes it all feel meaningless. And I know it’s different because it’s with me but it doesn’t change a thing for me. I can’t bring it up again either because I don’t want it to cause any actual problems especially because there’s nothing he can do about it and it’s an issue that’s completely coming from me.

Any tips to help get over it? (I am considering going to therapy to try see if that would help)

Me and my boyfriend have been dating for about 3 months, and as we start to get closer we’ve had a few issues and he’s completely unable to talk about his emotions. I understand where he’s coming from and how he feels, because I used to be the exact same but when I was a child, we’re both 18 which is arguably still young but im old enough to have a basic understanding of how to handle my emotions and he just doesn’t. This past week we’ve had ALOT of issues, I got super insecure about his past relationships and got really weird for a few days and he got really stressed out and overwhelmed about some stuff in his life that he’s always had a massive issue with. We both got over them decently quickly but it definetly made the relationship feel weird and rocky. He gets into weird moods sometimes where he doesn’t feel like talking or he just gets overwhelmed and shuts down for a few hours which is fine but he’s getting into these moods nearly every day, and he won’t tell me anything apart from “I’m annoyed” and only after I push about it. It’s been nearly every day for the past week and a half and it’s starting to get to me because i can’t tell if it’s about me, or if it’s something else but he won’t talk to me so I can’t help him in any way and I just feel shit when he does this because I’m unable to do anything until he calms down and ignores it. He’s said he hates communicating full stop which really annoyed me because you can’t have a healthy relationship with no communication, but he’s perfectly ok to communicate with me and listen to my feelings and he’s extremely supportive and caring and reassures me when I’m upset about anything but when it comes to him he’s like a stone wall. He brings up big things but with small things like these he just gets super weird, ignores me, hangs up abruptly if we’re on call and just doesn’t talk to me for the next few hours or if he does it’s just us calling in silence until he calms down.
I tell him all the time that he can talk to me about anything and he just says “I don’t want to talk”
I want to help him but I have no clue what to do because he’s so stubborn

Overall, I do really like the implant. Me and my boyfriend don’t have to use protection and I never have to worry about getting pregnant. However, I’ve noticed I’ve been SO much more emotional. Like things have been going on in my life that would have made me really upset and overwhelmed anyway but I’ve been reacting so much to all of it which i would have never done before. It also made my period a lot more painful for someone who never gets cramps. It hasn’t been too long since I got it, but I’m so scared these things are just going to get worse or not settle.

I’ve been dating this guy for a few months, and I e never really been in anything serious. I’ve had intense crushes on people but all I’ve actually done is just had small flings or had like one night things with guys at parties while we were both drunk. However he’s been in 2 serious relationships where he was deeply In love with them, slept with 5 (now 6 including me) people and he’s had at least 7 relationships and talking stages. I love him a lot and he loves me but I can’t stop thinking about all of the girls he’s been with before. Like when we’re doing something sexual the only thing I can think about is how many girls have done this exact same thing and how none of it is actually special because it’s happened so many times before. (I know that’s not true but it feels that way) I brung it up to him and it made things 10x worse and now I know every detail about all of them because I thought asking would make me feel better, and now every time I talk to him all I can imagen is him with other girls and it’s eating me away. I don’t want to end things but I don’t know how I’m supposed to get over this, and I don’t know if I can.

Ok so I got the implant, and I know it can stop your periods which I’m fine with, but I got it inserted like 7-8 days before my period so I was fully expecting to get my next period, and it stop or do something to my next one but I’m like 5 days late and I’m never late. I’m definitely overthinking but I’ve had so much sex after I got it Inserted (I waited the full 7 days after insertion) but I’m TERRIFIED somethings wrong or I’ve gotten pregnant.