u/Ok-Crazy3288

(30/f)

Worked a desk job for the last 6 years and its driving me insane, pay in unstable since its contract work and ive been leaning towards lifeguarding, i was a swimmer in HS and lived in places by the water and have done alot of open water swimming for years. I should be certified with my NL and SI by late august.

Things im **not** worried about:
- my swimming ability
- working with kids and instructing

Things that worry me:
- pay
- actually being hired, i would love full time if possible.

Someone pls tell me paying for all these courses, which are expensive af, is worth it so i can stop stressing, are lifeguards and instructors really in that demand?

Seeing a girl for 2 months, we have been texting every day since, maybe 6 dates total, very long dates, amazing chemistry + conversation right out of the gate, exactly my type, cut off all other connections to focus on her.

Her profile said; longterm relationship, monogamy, wanted to settle down.

We ended up having sex for the first time a couple nights ago, it felt special and it was amazing, but maybe 15 minutes after we ended that, as we are cleaning up, she looks me in the eye and says something along the lines of:

"im scared of commitment and dont wanna rush things, and i dont want you to be jealous. even tho i am not seeing other people, i dont want to feel restricted, i really really like you alot and want to keep seeing you."

uhg,.

Which started a long convo.

I eventually asked her randomly "when you picture yourself settled down, what does that look like? do you picture a man or a woman beside you?" (shes bi)

She said she didnt know...and then she said she wishes two women could have a baby... and then says shes scared of dating a man because she'd be losing her queer identity....

huh

It didnt hit me in the moment but ive had 24 hours to think about all of this and i feel sick to my stomach. fuck. please tell me i shouldn't feel weird about this, please tell me i feel sick to my stomach for no reason.

My type is soft masc with long hair and a pretty face, and i feel like this type is really hard to find so i kinda transitioned from a semi-femme presenting person to literally my description, and im finding it really fun so far and im noticing an insane amount of attention from other women.

I guess there really is a masc shortage because the moment i changed my dating app pics to soft masc vibes i started getting crazy amounts of likes and even getting approached in public.

Im enjoying it for now but i was just wondering if anyone else did this for either type of presentation?

I feel like my presentation can be pretty fluid but im also a people pleasure sometimes but idk if the attention is fueling me or im just having fun exploring, maybe both. either way, I like looking visibly gay so thats a plus.

25 first dates later and never felt a click, i thought something was wrong with me, I finally felt the click again and its mutual, someone stop me im gunna u-haul and we've only had 4 dates but GOD DAMN I MISSED THIS FEEELING, I MISSED THIS HIGH, AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASDLKFHOASIDSDFY249-I2UWHRPSKAJDNMFPA;OSRU8TY1-P3978GUOASPklasjhdflkasdjf